Chapter Five: PG

Middle-Earth

            "... Then we looked behind us and saw something glowing underneath the protective padding, so we grabbed our bags and went into the light. And then we ended up in a mysterious land..."
            "And since I had three cans of 7up, I had to go peeeeeeeeeee REALLLLY REALLLY BADLLLY!!! So I wandered off to look for a nice place to 'go', while Nicole stayed with our stuff! Then that's when I found you!"
            "Why did you squeeze MY butt?!?" asked Obi-Wan. Vanessa blushed while the whole fellowship, Nicole AND Skywalker looked at her.
            "Well... you're... so... squeezable and well... HOTTTT like HELL." Obi-Wan went into a shocked daze, just like before. Nicole tried to keep a straight face, and just barely succeeded.
            "Anywayz I heard Vanessa screaming and I followed it, and heard her talking about alcohol, um... and well that's all you need to know."

Obi-Wan got up and started to head back to the 'flying machine'. "I need a drink." Vanessa, Nicole and Skywalker ran after him,
            "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO... etc. (etc. etc.)"  Nicole started to quote her wisdom.
            "Alcohol is bad for yo-" was all she got out, when the orc, that Vanessa had supposedly hurt, (when her Elijah was up his ass) stood up and started to charge them. Legolas brought an arrow to his bow and let it fly and hit him where the sun did not shine. All the guys that were sitting crossed their legs. Vanessa ran to Obi-Wan, who hugged Nicole in his arms, and Vanessa to Skywalker who cradled her in his. The four walked back to the group and sat down. Legolas and Frodo looked so jealous ("awwwwwwwwwwww elf boy and hobbit man are jealous!")
            "Hey I'm not a boy! I'm 2931 years old!" (*Writers look at each other...'humph' oh well*)
            Gandalf knew these woods better than anyone. He would never leave people who didn't know the area alone in them, they WERE orc infested (as you know...).
            "Why don't you join us on our quest?"
            "Really?" Nicole looked up from the cradling arms of Obi-Wan.
            "Oh yeah, you already know about our mission so...so... you could help!" Legolas jumped in literally.
            "I'm sorry we don't know your task...quest...destiny...thing! (or thang!)"Obi-Wan asked.
            "Well then you can't come!" added Frodo teasingly. Sam hit him on the head.
            "That's very mean Mr. Frodo... tomatoes?" Sam offered him some and Frodo took it gladly.
            "This won't pay for how much it hurts, BUT it'll just have to do... fooooor nowwwwwwww! (dun dun dun dun dunnnnnnnnn)"
            "How did you come here anyway?" Vanessa questioned Skywalker...
            "We were getting drunk and well... I fell back on the control panel...spilling my drink on it, so...we went waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa (Breath) aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa (Breath) aaaaaaaaaaaaaa (Breath) aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay *gasp, gasp* off course." Obi-Wan dropped Nicole and went over to Skywalker...
            "WHY YOU LITTLE...!" Obi-Wan started to 'ring' his neck (think Bart and Homer Simpson). The only noise Skywalker could make was...
            "ARGCHERCH *gurgle* POOPIE *gurgle* ARGCHERCH!" Nicole and Vanessa pried Obi-Wan's hands off of Skywalker, while the others talked. Obi-Wan was getting a lecture on how 'wude' it was to try and strangle 'his' student. While Vanessa cradled Skywalker, Legolas and Frodo looked in jealousy. Aragorn went back to the four who were in the same general direction as the 'flying machine'.
            "We would be honoured if you would join us! I am Aragorn son of Arathorn; this is Gandalf the grey, our leader, Legolas son of Thranduil, Boromir son of Denethor, Gimli son of Groin (oops we mean Gloin) and of course the hobbits. Meridoc Brandybuck (Merry), Peregrin Took (Pippin), Samwise Gamgee and Frodo Baggins." Everyone looked up and/or waved hello, at their name.
            "Well I'm Vanessa an-"
            "And I'm Nicole."
            "I'm Obi-Wan Kenobi and this is 'my' (TEENAGER) apprentice, Anakin Skywalker."
            "I'm 19!!!!!!" The girls laughed at this.        

"So you're going to defy the natural written 'LAW' of J.R.R. Tolken and have a fellowship of 13?!" Nicole wondered/asked.
            "OH *CENSORED* WE FORGOT OUR BOOKS, in the forest somewhere. IT HAS MY... STUFF in it!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
            "YA mine TOO!!" Nicole added as the girls looked all innocent and batted their eyelashes, flirting shamelessly... So everyone went off in search of their 'stuff' which they called 'backpacks'.