Vegeta ½

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the second chapter to yet another Goku and Vegeta buddy fic

by

mkh2

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Disclaimer: Bwahahaha! I finally found a full-proof way to make DBZ and all related characters and products mine! ::holds a little bean in the air:: Now, it says here on the directions to take a pot, fill it two-thirds of the way with soil, put the bean in, cover it with an inch of soil and top with peat moss. Water generously. ::follows directions:: Oops – a little spillage here! ::wipes up:: Ah, it should be ready and done to get me what I want in roughly – oh, roughly a thousand years. Dag nab it! ::throws away directions:: Ah well, looks like DBZ and gang won't be mine any time soon. Looks like I'll just have to be content with borrowing the characters, ne? Oh Goku, Bejee, where are you?

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" " – denotes speech

' ' – denotes thought

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Vegeta ½ chapter 2

'Meet Bejee!'

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"Wait… you… really are Vegeta?" Goku asked, eyes wide and innocent.

"Yes I am Kakarrotto!" snarled Vegeta, shivering lightly from the wet clothes and light, cool breeze.

"But, but, but you can't be!" exclaimed Goku, shaking his head vehemently.

"And why the HFIL not?" growled Vegeta, eyes narrowing.

"Because – Vegeta doesn't have boobs!" Goku pointed out. "Unless, they aren't real are they?" Goku floated close and… *poke!*

Vegeta turned bright red, mortified. "Dag-frag nib it!" she swore, the words coming out garbled. 'He- he touched me!"

"Oh, they are real, but you curse like 'Geta when he's embarrassed, soo….." Goku frowned thoughtfully. "Hi Veggie!"

After Vegeta finished slapping Goku around the head for touching something which he… she… whatever… was so sensitive about, they went in search of the guide – maybe he knew somethi—

"Hello! Hello! There you are! I been searching for you! Must tell you about cursed springs!"

"Oh, cursed are they?" growled Vegeta, spinning on her heel to face him.

"Ah, I see you already found out, no?"

"We already found out, yes!" chirped Goku, pointing at Vegeta. "Well, at least 'Geta did!"

~

"So, you're saying that, that thing you were yelling about was that the springs were cursed?" Goku asked the poor spring guide.

"Ah, yes," he replied.

"We kinda already knew that!" yelled Vegeta, gesturing to her new body. "It's kinda hard not to notice!"

"Well, you can fix that," said the man.

"What? How?" demanded Vegeta, yanking him up by the collar.

"Simple – hot (or warm) water."

"Excellent." Vegeta dropped the man, tapping her fingers together.

'Creepy – she does that Mr. Burns* thing too well,' thought Goku, shivering slightly.

"Yes, hot water changes back to original form, cold water changes to curse form," said the man, breathing more clearly now.

"What? This is permanent?" Vegeta rounded on him.

"Yes – that's why this such popular training ground – best training when do all possible to not be cursed."

"NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNnnnnnnnnnnnnnooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

~

Vegeta grumbled angrily, as she watched Goku set up a fire to try and heat up some water. "This stinks. This stinks big time. This really, really stinks. This – "

Goku sighed. "Maybe we could think up a name for your female form while you contemplate how much this situation stinks."

"Oh, shut up you! This is all your fault!"

"Well, if you hadn't gotten all riled up over a little bit of teasing, you wouldn't have landed in the water in the first place, Bejee."

"Bejee? What's that?" Vegeta blinked, tucking her feet under herself.

"Eh, it's sort of a play on Veggie and, ah, Bijou," said Goku.

"Bijou? Isn't that French?" asked Vegeta.

"Think so."

"I'm not French! Do I look French? No! I'm saiyajin!" Vegeta snapped.

"Look, it's just an idea, and frankly, Bejee suits you."

Vegeta humphed slightly and looked away. "So, ah, where'd you get the Bijou thing from anyway?"

"Oh, Gohan was trying to flip to the news channel and he came across a bunch of dancing, singing, bouncing, talking hamsters."

"Hey! I'm not a hamster!" Vegeta howled, bright red in fury.

"I know that! But I liked the name – it's cute."

"I'm not cute!" Vegeta grabbed a stone and clenched it in her fist.

"All right, all right, you're 'uncute' – happy?" Goku poked the pot of water. 'Hm, looks like it's finally getting a little warm.' "Ah, Veg – "

"That's even worse!" shrieked Vegeta, chucking the stone and - *sploosh!*

Goku stared in shock. "Vegeta! You just killed the pot! And that water had just gotten warm too!"

Vegeta flushed. "Feh!"

"Fine, fine," said Goku, sitting down tiredly next to the doused fire. "We should at least try to consider a way to cure you of this."

"Right, perhaps another spring?" Vegeta suggested, leaning forward slightly.

"I think we should call Bulma to get her opinion." Goku got up and turned, intent on finding a phone.

Vegeta's eyes narrowed; she jumped and landed feet first on Goku's head. "Waugh!" Goku fell face first in the dirt.

"Listen you! You will not tell Bulma about this – just say that we're going to train here for a while longer. I will not have her seeing me as a woman!"

"Isn't that going to be a little hard to hide?" Goku asked. "I mean, you do have some rather big, uh, well, those." He poked one.

"Gaah!" Vegeta started slapping Goku over the head. "Don't do that! You should know better!"

"Hn, yeah – Bulma did say something about that… I haven't done the "pat-pat" test in years!"

"'Pat-pat'?" asked Vegeta, cocking her head to the side.

"Yeah, pat-pat! …don't you know what it is?"

Vegeta shook her head – what is it?

"Then, I'll show you!" Goku reached over and *pat-pat*.

Vegeta turned red. "KAKARROTTO!!!!!!!"

"Yipes!" Goku turned tail and ran.

~

Over at the information booth, the little round man watched two giant trails of dust zipping around on the ground, voices coming from somewhere inside them.

"Get back here and fight like a man!"

"Maybe you should be a man first!"

"Dingle bop lap nib it!"

The little man blinked. "Nope, tings never boring around here. Where's my smoothie?"

~Owari~

Well… that was kind of amusing. It was a lot harder to remember what was supposed to be going on in this chapter than originally participated. 'Course, it didn't help that I kept getting sick all week… Feh.

Unfortunately, I have no real concept of how long it took me to write this – less than an hour combined I think (I know it was less than an hour originally…) So, I'm not putting the times on the bottom this time around.

* I do not own Mr. Burns or any of the Simpson's characters. Never have, never will.