Disclaimer: "Snape's Worst Memory" belongs to J.K Rowling as does just about everything else.

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Chapter Eight: James Potter, Resident Trouble Maker

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Number 32:

I don't know what it is about the end of the term, but every year, right before final exams, during, and after, Potter and his cohorts always seem to pull lots of pranks and get into trouble. Well, more trouble than usual. And this year, he's tied in asking me out with all of his pranks.

What a bloody nuisance.

Just yesterday, he charmed all of the desks in the classrooms where we have lessons together to have L.E + J.P engraved into the wood. Sounds harmless right?

Wrong.

You thought Potter could be harmless? I laugh at you.

It was Emmeline who first noticed the engraving on my desk and once I realized what it was, I tried to cover it up with my hand lest anyone notice it. As soon as my skin touched the letters, they turned bright green and my voice could be heard saying "Lily Evans + James Potter."

I must have turned at least five shades of red, each a darker color than the last. At first, I thought that was just something that Potter had done to my desk, but no. So naturally, Potter spent his entire day "accidentally" touching the engravings to embarrass me and get a laugh out of the other students.

How typical of him.

At least I can say with grim satisfaction that Potter received a detention from Professor McGonagall for his idiotic prank. I say grim satisfaction because by the time I got to Potions at the end of the day, the Potions Master was getting rather irritated with people just happening to touch to the carvings. Hestia, who was my potions partner, just happened to set our crushed nettles on top of the engraving on my desk. When I went to pick up the dish, my finger rubbed against the letters and sent the stupid thing off.

I received a detention for "rudely disturbing the class". Stupid Potter. That's twice in one year that he's caused my to get a detention. I've gone from no detentions in four whole years to two in one year. And it's all Potter's fault.

I swear, someday, I will get even with Potter for everything he has put me through. I don't know what, when, or where, but I will find a way if it takes me the rest of my life.

Watch me become obsessive compulsive over this. Of course, he'd like that wouldn't he? I'd just bet.

Number 33:

I detest people who bully other for sport, tormenting and mocking them in front of a crowd of on lookers. Hence, I detest James Potter, because he is one such person. Today, after our Defense Against the Dark Arts O.W.L, he and Sirius Black teamed up to hex and publicly embarrass Severus Snape.

Emmeline, Alice, Hestia and I were sitting underneath a beech tree on the lakeshore looking over out notes for our upcoming O.W.L when a loud bang drew our attention. Across the lake from us, were Potter and Black hexing the pants off of Snape. Which they very nearly did I might add.

We watched them for a minute or two before I decided to take action. My friends were in shock. Me, help Snape? A Slytherin who's famous for his knowledge of curses?

Yes.

Personally, I've never cared for Snape on way or another and he's a little too interested in the Dark Arts for my liking. Not to metion that his friends are supporters of this idea of "pureblod" and bully Muggleborns like me.

But suddenly, it was no longer about Snape and Potter. It was about my being able to help someone in the same position that I had been in so many times before.

Having the mickey taken out of you in front of a crowd is about as much fun as having your fingernails peeled off. Not that I would know about the fingernail part, but I do know about being humiliated in front of a crowd.

Back when I was in primary school, I only had one friend, Victoria Turner. Nobody else wanted to be my friend because of all of the strange things that happened around me. Now I know that they were caused by being magical, but no one knew at the time, and people were sometimes scared of me.

I had to help Snape because I know how it feels.

I marched right over to Potter and demanded that he leave Snape alone.

It's the strangest and stupidest thing, but lately, whenever Potter addresses me, his voice suddenly becomes deeper. I suppose that he's trying to appear more mature than he is, which shouldn't be too hard, since he has all the maturity of a five year with a box of finger paints. Still, Potter's voice change just adds to the ever-growing list of reasons why he is the most pathetic person in the whole of Britain.

Me: "Leave him alone! What's he ever done to you?"

I admit that was a pretty pointless thing to say since Snape doesn't exactly pass up an opportunity to hex Potter or his friends. I have only myself to thank for Potter's "witty" comeback.

Potter: "Well, it's more the fact that exists, if you know what I mean…"

Me: "You think you're funny, but you're just an arrogant, bullying, toerag Potter. Leave him alone."

Potter: "I will of you go out with me Evans. Go on… Go out with me and I'll never lay a wand on old Snivelly again."

Is it just me, or have we not been over this several (thousand) times before? Earth to Potter, my answer has not changed since yesterday.

I told Potter that II wouldn't go out with him if it was a choice between him and the giant squid.

I meant that too. I'd rather tell people that I'm going with a squid than with James Potter.

Snape then hit Potter with a nasty curse that cut a gash in the side of Potter's head and sent blood flying everywhere.

However, Potter gave as good as he got when he hung Snape upside down in midair. I can tell you, Snape's pants are something that I never want to want to see again in my entire life. Ick.

I almost laughed, but then I remembered my purpose there was to defend Snape, not mock him. I told Potter to let Snape down and he complied by jerking his wand up sharply, causing Snape to fall to the ground in a heap. No sooner had Snape begun to stand up, than Sirius placed the full body bind curse on him and he back on the ground, stiff as a board.

I yelled at the both of them to leave Snape alone (I'm beginning to wonder if they aren't deaf. How many times do I need to repeat myself before I'm heard?) and pulled out my wand, ready to take drastic measures.

Potter sighed deeply and dramatically before taking the curse off Snape. Given Potter's supposed feelings towards me, I really don't think he would have hexed me anyway.

He said, "There you go. You're lucky Evans was here Snivellus."

And that's when it happened. Snape replied, "I don't need help from filthy little Mudbloods like her."

Now that was unexpected. I spend ten minutes of my life defending him and he turns around and calls me a…Mudblood? So much for trying to help out those in need.

So I told him that I wouldn' bother in future and to wash his pants. And I called him Snivellus.

I am such a hypocrite. I know that he called me a Mudblood, but that's no excuse for my poor behavior. In my anger, I became what I was trying to defend Snape from. I stooped to Potter's level.

Potter: "Apologize to Evans!"

Me: "I don't want you to make to apologize. You're just as bad as he is!"

Potter: "What! I'd never call you, a – you-know-what!"

By that time, I'd had it. Seriously, I snapped. I'd had enough of Snape, of Potter, and just everybody at that point. So, then and there I told Mr. James Potter, Quidditch star and trouble maker what I thought of him.

What I truly thought of him, omitting nothing.

Me: "Messing up your hair because you think it looks cool to look like you've just gotten off your broomstick, showing off with that stupid Snitch, walking down corridors and hexing anyone who annoys you just because you can – I'm surprised your broomstick can get off the ground with that fat head on it. You make me SICK!

After my little tirade, I choose to return to the girls' dormitory without my friends. I really felt like being alone at the moment. I mean, I was just exceedingly rude to Potter. It's not that deserves anything less, but that's twice today that I stooped to his level. By saying what I did, I am no better than he is now.

As I walked away I heard him call out my name.

Potter: "Evans! Hey, EVANS! What is it with her?"

What is it with me? I'll you what's "with me". What's with me is that I don't find Potter to be a very nice person. When does he ever do things for other people besides his friends or himself? Never, that's when. He is mean, not to mention sneaky and conniving. I do not find James Potter to be very endearing person.

End of story.

Number 34:

What am I going to do with him? Seriously, now, you would have thought that my delightful speech would have had some effect on Potter, but he doesn't seem to be taking any of my words to heart.

Over the last week I have been avoiding Potter with a passion, but the more I try not to see him, the more I do.

Earlier tonight, I was in the library, and unlike previous times, I was activiely trying to avoid to Potter. Well, as was completely expected, he found me. I tell you, it's quite hard to hide when you have red hair when there are ten other people maximum in the entire school with the particular shade of hair. Normally, I don't mind having red hair; I'm pretty unique in that respect, but sometimes I wish that I had a more common color of hair so that Potter would have a bit more trouble finding me in a crowd.

Looking for Lily? Oh, sure. See that burst of red over there in that back corner. Yeah, that's her, the girl with that humongous book propped up in front of her face like she's hiding from someone.

Thanks a lot. You gave away my position.

Potter: "Hey, Evans. What's up?"

Me: "Nothing."

Potter: "What are you studying for?"

Me: "Transfiguration."

Potter: "Need help? I'm good at transfiguration, what do you need to know about?"

Me: "I'm doing fine all by myself Potter. Please leave me alone."

Potter: "No can do Evans. I'm on a mission."

Me: "Really."

Potter: "What are you studying?"

Me: "Are you going to go away anytime soon?"

Potter: "Nope!"

Me: "Fine! I'm working on an essay about animagus. Happy?"

Potter: "Really? I can help you with that. What do you need?"

Me: "I need you to leave me alone so I can work in peace."

Potter: "All right."

I thought he was going to leave me alone when he reached over, stole the book I was reading out of my hands, and ran off through the library laughing like a maniac.

I wonder if that curse Snape sent at his head didn't do something to his brain.

I chased after Potter and my book, but I couldn't find him anywhere. None of his friends or mine had seen him. So I went back to the library to get my stuff, and while I was gone, somebody took my favorite quill!

Just when I thought that things couldn't get worse, they did. I was walking down the corridor next to the Charms classroom when out of nowhere, Potter appears, takes my hand and starts running down the length of the hallway at breakneck speed. At this point, I was beginning to seriously wonder if Potter hadn't fallen off his broom and done something to his already impaired brain.

I tried to jerk my hand out his, but he held tight. When we reached the portrait hole, he finally let go and I took this opportunity to slap him. He just smiled at me and said what a nice dream this would make. Oh bugger, bugger, bugger.

No number, but worth writing down:

Summer holidays starts tomorrow and halleluiah I can't wait! An entire summer without Potter!

Could life get any better?

Of course, I can't pretend that he won't send me letters; I know he will, but I won't open them. I plan to send every single solitary letter that James Potter send my way right back to him.

Oh, I'm so happy I could sing, but for the sake of the other girls in my dorm, I'll hum instead.

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Thank you to all of my wonderful reviewers!