Hey readers! Danika here. I decided to take a little break in this chapter to introduce some very important characters.

First of all, what do we love about Dragon Ball Z? The large variety of comical characters? The ongoing storyline that always keeps us guessing? The high action-packed martial arts and energy battles? Or maybe it's just because of how our favorite heroes always save the day.

The answer? All of the above! So in order to make this a true blue DBZ fanfic, I had to create one thing…A Villain.

The DBZ villain needs to be so evil, so cruel, so annoying and despicable that the Z fans love to hate him. …And love it even more when he gets his ass kicked! So I came up with King Myotis.

King Myotis is not that different from other DBZ bad guys. He wants to either rule the universe with an iron fist, or destroy it. And like all baddies, he'll enjoy spreading pain and fear, and naturally, he hates our heroes.

Laura tugs on Danika's sleeve

'Hey! Don't forget about me!'

Oh, right! Danika snaps her fingers and automatically the room turns dark, all except for a spotlight shining down on her. She reaches behind her back and pulls out a microphone. She gives it a few taps.

Testing… Testing… Hey, is this thing on?

The microphone screeches with that annoying sound it always makes when you get too close to the speaker. Danika takes a few steps forward, then blows on the microphone.

Okay, (ahem) Introducing….The one, the only (thank Kami for that)…LAURA!

Big flashing lights suddenly appear over a large picture of Laura

So far Laura's only been mentioned in the various interruptions in this story, but believe it or not, she actually plays a very important role in this fanfic.

Laura smiles 'BAAA…REE…TO!'

Uh…right. Anyway, Laura, as you can see, is very insane and deeply disturbed, but that's okay. In case you haven't noticed, we're all insane, just some more than others.

As I was saying, before Laura did her little bareto thing (which, by the way, I purposely misspelled for pronunciation reasons), Laura will play the role of The Guardian Of The Earth. No, that doesn't mean she's a fighter.

The Guardian Of The Earth is actually in charge of keeping things in order. She controls things like the weather, making it rain in rainforests, snow in the north and south poles, and making it really hot and dry in the deserts. She also keeps the planet's inhabitants in line, constantly monitoring their behavior and reporting to King Yemma, who decides whether that person should go to hell or the other world. She is responsible for protecting all life on the planet, whether big or small. She makes sure the animals, the people and the plants only die of natural death or food chain, and yes, the occasional maniac. She keeps all major plagues under control. Makes sure certain species evolve. And keeps all magic in check, making sure that magic never plays a part in the planet's destruction, or interferes with life's natural development.

Basically, this job has a lot of paperwork.

'Huh?'

Don't worry, Laura, I'm sure you can handle it.

'…What kind of paperwork are we talking about here?'

Er, I'll tell ya later… Anyway, it's up to the Earth's heroes, special forces, Z fighters or whatever you prefer to call them, to help out The Guardian, and do battle with anyone or anything that tries to threaten the Earth's peace.

Sara is sitting in a corner. Just staring into nothingness.

Sara? What are you doing?

"I still can't get over that last chapter…"

Hmm? What do you mean?

"I mean I'm not sure whether to hit you for making me do such a crazy, totally out of character thing, or to thank you for making it turn out so well."

Oh….er, I think I would prefer option B…

Laura steps in 'Ya know, for an amateur romance writer, that was pretty good, although I personally prefer a comedy.'

Danika smiles Heh heh, of course it was good! Did you forget? I am Danika, the Cutest lil Genius in the Universe! My writing is always a masterpiece, whether it's a comedy or a romance, even though I'm still getting used to writing romance without gagging. But either way, I dominate! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Laura face falters. She picks herself up and turns to Sara 'Is she always like that?'

"Shh!"

'I'm serious, does she really think she's that cute? I mean, come on.'

"Quiet! She'll hear you!"

'Don't you think she's a little obsessive?'

Danika pops up with a BakaBlasterXp9000 Laser Bazooka pointed at Laura's head, and her finger on the trigger

Sara sighs "I tried to warn you…"

Danika's eyes narrow as she glares at Laura What was that?!

Laura is cowering before the extremely large gun, sweat pouring like bullets from her forehead, which just happens to be only four inches from the tip of the Bazooka

'Um…you are sooo cute, Danika, and a genius, heh, heh, please don't kill me.'

Danika growls, then finally decides that Laura had learned her lesson

Fine, I'll let you go this time, but from now on, you'd better watch it!

'Phew!'

Now, getting back to King Myotis, his job as the Villain is to try to take over the planet Earth and tear our two heroes apart.

Sara clenches her fist "Heh, let's just see him try!"

Laura and Danika stare at Sara, who is now quite embarassed

"Um…Heh, don't mind me. Just continue with what you were doing."

'How come whenever Sara gets mad, her head gets so incredibly big, then shrinks down back to normal when we notice her?'

Sara grits her teeth "Laura, have you ever heard the story of the little girl who asked one too many questions?"

'Yeah, she got…Oh.'

"Try to keep that in mind."

'Kay.'

Uh, anyway, as you probably already know, the bad guy always seems really strong and unbeatable in the beginning, but in the end, good always triumphs over evil, and looks pretty cool doing it, too!

Laura waves her hand in the air 'Wait! I got a question!'

Danika sighs Yes, Laura, what is it now?

'Why does this King what's his face want to conquer the Earth anyway?'

Say what?!

Sara joins in "She's got a good point. I mean, global warming, acid rain, polluted oceans, toxic waste, the thinning ozone layer… What does he want with this planet anyway?"

Hello, people! He's a Villain! That's what Villains do!

Laura rolls her eyes "What, so now you're some kind of super villain expert?'

No! It's just…well, Laura, why do you want to rule the world, hmm?

Laura grins 'Because the world would be so much cooler if I ruled it, no da!'

Sara laughs "Hee hee, you used the 'no da' from Fushigi Yûgi!"

'Yep! I wonder what Tama-baby's doing right now?'

Ahem! Laura and Sara look over to Danika, who is impatiently tapping her foot

'Sorry.'

"Sorry."

In case you two have forgotten, this is a Dragon Ball Z fanfiction!

"Speaking of which, what's this chapter for anyway? What does it have to do with the story?"

Well, the next chapters get a little serious, so I thought it might be best to squeeze in a chapter devoted to comedy relief.

'Serious, huh?' Laura peeks over Danika's shoulder and flips through the pages. Her eyes bug out. 'Holy Toledo Batman!'

Sara tries to sneak a peek "What? What?"

'Danika's handwriting sucks!'

Give me that! Danika takes back the fanfic and slaps Laura upside the head

'Well it does. And your spelling sucks, too.'

Oh, and I suppose you're a senior college English professor?!

'Noooo….'

Then can it! Sigh, it's not easy being a cute lil genius, you know.

Now Sara is getting impatient "Hey! What about the story?! When's the chapter gonna end?"

Not yet, I still need to fill up space.

"Why you little…"

Look, Kitty!

"KITTYYYYYYYY!" Sara runs off in search of Kitty

'It's amazing how that seems to work every single time…'

Yeah,…weird.

'So, um…How long will Sara search for Kitty?'

Who knows. It's really pathetic, though, running off like that, looking for something each time someone mentions its name…

Laura thinks for a moment, then points behind Danika 'Hey, look, it's Puar!'

PUAAAAAAAR! Danika runs off in search of Puar

Laura smiles 'Hee hee, this is fun!'

Laura is silent for a moment, then realizes that she's the only one there

'Buwahahahaha! Looks like I'm in charge of this fanfic now! All words are in my control! Finally, I can take over the universe! Buwahahahahahahahahahaha!'

Suddenly, Danika and Sara appear, a little disappointed about not finding Puar or Kitty

'Oh! H-hey guys, um, I was just, uh… waiting for you to come back, heh heh.'

Sara looks closely at Laura "Laura, you weren't plotting to take over the universe again, were you?"

'W-who, me? Of course not!' Laura has guilty written all over her face, literally

Sara hands her a mirror

'Ack! How did that get all over my face?!'

Sara chuckles "Ha! I knew it! Guilty! Guilty!"

Laura panics 'N-no! How could this happen?! I- I'm so confused!' Laura falls to her knees and begins to cry 'Waaaaaaaaaaaaaah! I want my moose!'

Danika walks up and grabs Laura by the cheek Hmm… Hey, wait a minute, this looks like your handwriting, Sara!

"Um." Sara looks nervous

Laura pokes Danika's shoulder 'Uh, Danka, khan I pwees haf ma ace bak ow?'

Huh? Oh! Right, sure… Danika releases her grip on Laura's cheek

After rubbing her sore cheek, Laura turns and points at Sara 'SO! It was YOU! You're the Guilty one! Guilty! Guilty! Guilty!…'

Sara covers her ears "Aaaaaah, no! It's not true! The sheep are lying!"

Danika gasps What?! You DARE deny the sheep?!

Laura is still chanting 'Guilty! Guilty! Guilty! Guilty! Guilty!…. Okay, I'm done now.'

Danika raises her hands in the air Hold it! Stop!

Both Sara and Laura turn their attention towards Danika

"What's up?"

'Yeah, we're kind of busy in a bizzaro scene right now.'

That's my point! We've gotten totally off the subject! We've done nothing but rant on and on with pure insanity!

"So?"

Laura nods 'Yeah, that's what we always do.'

I know, I know, but we can at least put it to use! I made this chapter so I could introduce two new characters and that's what I'm going to do!

'But you've already introduced us.'

….Well, I'm going to do it again!

'Why?'

Because I can! And it's going to be done in DBZ style!

'Okay! Okay! Just take a chill pill!'

Danika looks confused Chill pill? That's not in my medication… Are you trying to sell me some sort of drug?!

'What? No! I'm just, uh… erg… I'm all confuseded!'

Sara looks at Danika "Is that even a word?"

No, but I can make it one; I have the power to do these things, you know…

"So, do you really not know what a chill pill is?"

Of course not. I just love to play with people's minds.

"Oh… Hey, I've been meaning to ask you about King Myotis."

Yeah?

"Don't you think he's missing something?"

Hmmm? What do you mean?

"He needs a purely evil name!"

What's wrong with Myotis?

"Nothing, nothing, but that sounds more like a last name to me… He needs a first name, doesn't he?"

Well, I guess so. What did you have in mind?

Sara grins evilly "Jonathan!"

Laura laughs 'Ha! I saw that one coming!'

Jonathan? That's not really an alien type name…

"I know, but it's a really evil one! Plus, it will make it even MORE fun when I kill him!"

Well………..

"Please!"

Oh, alright.

'Yay!" Sara smiles happily as she imagines herself blasting a certain Jonathan into oblivion

Laura is munching down on some popcorn 'I love watching you two! It's hilarious!'

Sara eyes the popcorn suspiciously "Hey, I thought you had braces."

'Not in the fanfiction, I don't.'

"Oh. You gonna share that?"

'No.'

"Come on, give me some!"

'No! My popcorn! Mine!'

Danika sighs as she watches Sara and Laura viciously wrestle for the popcorn My god, how immature can you get? Fighting over popcorn? You two really need to grow up.

A piece of popcorn hits Danika in the face Grr…Alright, that's it! It's Go Time!

Danika charges forward and body slams Sara and Laura

We are currently facing technical difficulties; please stand by.

…..

.

…..

Thank you for your patience; and now, back to the fanfiction.

Both Sara and Laura have mouths full of popcorn, but they don't seem too happy about it

Sorry about the interruption. Bur for some reason, Laura and Sara couldn't seem to work out how to share the popcorn, so I came up with the solution.

(She stuff half of the popcorn into Laura's mouth and the other half in Sara's)

Hey, whatever works.

Sara manages to swallow her popcorn, and runs up and slaps Danika upside the head really, really hard.

OW!

"Hmph. That's what you get. Never ever mess with me when it comes to popcorn! Now do your little character thingies so we can end this chapter!"

Danika massages her head Geesh, okay, okay…

Okay, now I'll discuss character designs:

When I first created King Myotis "Ahem!" King Jonathan Myotis, I really wanted to stick to Akira Toriyama's design. So I started off with some original DBZ bad guys.

For King Myotis's basic body and facial structure design, I used Cell. However, the eyes weren't threatening enough for the character, so I gave him Super Buu's eyes and fangs. For skin color, I used a dark blood red. Then I decided he needed pointy ears like Garlic Jr. Then I added some horns, but he was starting to look like the Devil, so I gave him some wildly colored hair. And of course, he needed black claws.

Next, he needed a freaky outfit. So, to start off, I took Dabora's cape, and changed it black, for sort of an evil overlord look. Then I drew some basic body armor. I gave him brown and purple sleeves (bad guys need a bad sense of fashion) and some brownish gloves. And something was missing; it is the one trait that all of the major DBZ villains have, it was what separated the show-off loser from the baddest of the bad. So for pants, I gave him pink spandex.

Laura looks confusingly at Danika 'Pink spandex?'

Yep, only the evilest of villains associate with pink. Frieza had a pink battle aura, Cell had pink eyes, and Majin Buu, heck, how more pink can you get?

'I get the pink thing, but why spandex?'

Because only the most annoying characters wear spandex all the time.

Sara perks up "Like Vegeta!"

Yep. Heck, ya can't get more annoying than that. Now add some ugly boots and voila! You have King Myotis!

Now for Laura, I gave her rounder, larger eyes than Sara. And of course I gave her glasses for the realistic Laura look. For her hair, I used the hairstyle I remember from the karaoke party at the library: a ponytail with a few strands of hair at the sides. And I gave her two little fangs to add to the zanyness of her character. Then came her outfit. I started off with Kami-sama's robes, gave them long baggy sleeves, and colored it light blue with an orange color.

Laura pops up 'And don't forget the lobster on the front!'

What?! There is no lobster!

'Yes there is, on the front, inside a red circle!'

No, that's the symbol of the Guardian!

'The symbol is a lobster?'

No! It's modified Chinese characters!

'Looks like a lobster to me.'

Danika looks at the picture It does not look like a-okay, maybe it does, but if you look closer, it's Chinese characters!

Sara sighs "Can we please end this chapter now? I want to see the rest of the story! …Not that I'm excited or anything…no…not at all…"

Well, okay, I guess it is time we got this story rolling. Alright, let's do it!

Sara smiles "Yay!"

--Right after I add a dramatic ending.

"Say what?"

You know, something to give this chapter a little oomph.

"No, you don't! You're just trying to fill up space! That's what you always do! Not that I'm complaining, 'cause I really like this fanfic, it's very well written."

Uh-huh, and I supposed that the fact that it's about you and Trunks has nothing to do with it?

"No…Of course not, heh heh…"

Mm-hmm…right.

Anyway, readers beware: some intense violence is coming soon!

And make sure to watch out for King Myotis, because if our heroes can't stop him, the entire Earth is under his control!

("That was kind of corny, don't you think?" Shut up…)