Disclaimer: All characters and places belong to J.K. Rowling. I own only the idea of this story and I don't earn money with it.
Dedication: This story is dedicated to my "Sis", Hoshi. °love ya, honey°
Summary: Two years after her graduation, Hermione returned to Hogwarts. She's thinking about her past.
A/N: Excuse any grammar-mistakes, but english isn't my native language. I only learnt it at school, so I'm not the best to speak and write it, but I'll do my very best. :)
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I don't understand, why you left without saying a word. You didn't say goodbye. You didn't gave us the time to say goodbye.
You just left. Without saying, what you wanted to do or where you wanted to go.
And some days later they brought you back.
I saw your green eyes. Without a trace of life. They didn't shine, as then, when we saw each other.
Your body was cold. It didn't radiate this warmth, this safety, as in those days, when you fell asleep in front of the fireplace.
You never knew what I felt for you.
I didn't dare to say you, that I love you. I always thought, that we had enough time, when we graduated. But we hadn't got this time.
I loved you for seven years without wanting you to know that I love you. Another two years I'm loving you and I'm not able to say it to you.
Now I'm sitting here, at the top of the astronomy-tower and remembering the time when we sat here. Harry, do you remember how it was, when we sneaked up here to watch at the sky? Or in the second year, as we went up here with Norbert?
I look at the moon and I hope that the door will open and that you will come to me, put your arms around me and that you'll say how much you miss me.
In 6th year you started to call me Mione. I don't liked it, when Ron called me that way, but when you did so... When you did so it was different. When you called me Mione was a warmth in your voice, which I didn't noticed before.
When I think of those days today, my whole body contracts. The memories of you are hurting. But your absence hurts more. The certainty that I won't hear your laughing, won't see your emerald-green eyes, won't see YOU again.
I remember the day, when they brought your lifeless body back.
It were only three days 'til the summer holidays and Ron and I were in the Great Hall when some Aurors came in. You suspended in front of them. Your whole body was covered with cuts and weals. You were dirty. When I realized that you were dead, I wanted to rush over to you and Ron wanted to hold me back, but he didn't manage it.
I'll never forget this empty expression of your eyes.
On this evening Dumbledore told us that you defeated Voldemort, but that you also died yourself. No one wanted to believe this and even on Draco Malfoy's face was the expression of a shock.
Ginny, Ron and I were the ones who were mostly affected.
Ginny didn't talk about it until today and Ron, Ron throws himself at work. [I don't know if it's right... Sorry!] It's his way to digest it all. But I learned that this is no way. Because of that I returned. Here, at Hogwarts, everything reminds me of you, every little corner.
The Room of Requirement, where we had our club in the 5th, the Quidditchfield, where you were the best, the common-room, where you fell asleep in front of the fireplace after hours of learning...
I wipe away the tears which are running down my cheeks. I still love you, but I can't say it to you. Why didn't I dare? Why was I so naive and thought that we had enough time after graduating? Why did I repress that you had to face Voldemort one day?
You know, I was always good at school, but I can't manage with feelings. Instead of that, you always saw if there was something going on with me. But you didn't knew that I love you, or you didn't let it show that you knew it.
I'm looking up to the sky and one star is shining very bright this evening. Suddenly I've got a feeling as if you were here with me. A light breeze is coming up and is tousling my hair. "I love you, Harry", I'm whispering and look up to the star. And all of a sudden I know that you knew it all the time.
Wherever you are now, I know that you're waiting there 'til I'm coming, too. And then nothing will part us...
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A/N²: Excuse my bad english. ; I'm very sorry, but I hope, that you understood it anyway.