--------------------------------
Part 4
--------------------------------
"Is everyone here?" Sir Nicholas de Mimsy-Porpington said officiously.
"The Baron has yet to arrive, Sir Nicholas," the Grey Lady's quiet voice wafted across the classroom.
"Well if he doesn't hurry up we'll start the meeting without him." Sir Nicholas replied and nodded so firmly that his head fell, mostly, off.
"Oh, do keep your head on," chuckled the Fat Friar.
"Ha! Ha! You know," grumbled Sir Nicholas, "that joke was old when Dumbledore was a child."
"That recently?" the Fat Friar grinned.
The conversation came to a halt when the Bloody Baron drifted through the far wall. He surveyed his fellow spectres and raised his left eyebrow, sardonically.
"I've always wondered," quipped Sir Nicholas, "is being able to do that a prerequisite for joining Slytherin?"
The Baron lowered his left eyebrow and raised his right one. He leered evilly at Sir Nicholas.
"Gentlemen," said the Grey Lady quietly. "Kindly behave like the Noble Ghosts you are and not like a pair of schoolboys fighting over an orange."
"An orange?" Sir Nick asked.
"They were all the rage when I was corporeal," sniffed the Grey Lady.
"Must've been a while ago," muttered Sir Nick, earning himself icy stares from the other three spectres. "My apologies, my lady, it's just I was expecting you to say a 'chocolate frog'. The children these days seem to thrive on them."
"It's the cards you know, they..." the Fat Friar's words were interrupted by the Bloody Baron.
"Forget the frogs."
"Oh, yes. Certainly my lord Baron." The Fat Friar adjusted his cowl and said, "Right-o, I call to order the first meeting of the GHOULS Society and..."
"Ghouls?" Sir Nicholas spluttered.
"Really, how could you address us as common Ghouls?" murmured the Grey Lady, sounding very like Professor Trelawney when she wasn't getting her way.
"Ghosts Helping Our Unwed Lonely Slytherins," said the Fat Friar patiently.
Sir Nicholas snorted, "Better not let Professor Snape hear that one. I don't know about you but I don't fancy meeting another Basilisk."
"Forget the name," hissed the Bloody Baron commandingly. "I want to get this over with before Peeves wrecks the castle."
"Very well," said the Grey Lady. "I shall chair the meeting." She looked at the three male spectres and waited for Sir Nicholas to stop fidgeting, before she added, "As I understand it our plan is to use subtle methods to ensure Professors Snape and Sinistra are wed by... when, my lord Baron?"
"Before the end of the school year," whispered the Bloody Baron.
"So, we have to get them married by June." The Grey Lady said firmly. "I have been considering the matter and I have come up with a plan of attack." She pulled a large spectral parchment out of her sleeve and - ignoring Sir Nicholas's 'how'd she do that?' - she unfurled it. It was a map of Hogwarts Castle.
"As you can see, our main problem is distance. Professor Snape lurks here in the dungeons." The Grey Lady pointed to a section of the map marked 'in desperate need of Spring Cleaning'. "While Professor Sinistra hides up in the Astronomy Tower." She pointed to a tower marked 'Shift workers - do not haunt during daytime'. "Our biggest problem would seem to be getting them in the same room at the same time."
"Duh!" said the Fat Friar. He blushed pale pink, "Sorry, been around the children too much."
"It is rather obvious, my lady," added Sir Nick.
"What I was going to say, before you rudely interrupted me," the Grey Lady sniffed, "is that we need to get Professor Sinistra downstairs. Professor Snape wanders all over the lower reaches of the castle. Redirecting him should be relatively easy. Even your Sir Nicholas or the Fat Friar could do it."
"Thank you very much!" said the Friar in a hurt tone. He floated away to the far corner of the room where he sulked.
"Oh yes," added Sir Nicholas, pacing back and forth in mid-air, "we go after the dangerous one while you and the Baron go after the one who won't jinx you into another existence."
"Afraid?" sneered the Baron.
"No," replied Sir Nicholas huffily, "but I do not like to have my bravery questioned."
"Oh really! You are brave, both of you." The Grey Lady said bossily, "But you are not good dissemblers. It will take a lot of deception to get Professor Sinistra out of that tower. The Baron and I are better in that regard."
Sir Nicholas and the Fat Friar exchanged glances and nodded to each other.
"Very well, my lady," Sir Nicholas bowed and smiled, "we'll redirect Snape and you show what an expert liar you are."
Lost for words, the Grey Lady stared angrily at Sir Nicholas while the Friar chuckled and the Baron raised both his eyebrows in amusement.
"Very well," the Grey Lady said firmly. "When shall we start?"
"I have already started," the Baron replied, a cold smile on his face. "We will act tomorrow. After the letters arrive."
--------------------------------
Professor Snape was making his way to breakfast the next morning when he saw Professor Sinistra coming down the staircase. Not quite knowing why, he waited for her to catch up to him.
"Unusually early for you, Professor," Snape said quietly.
"It was cloudy last night," yawned Sinistra. "No good for making observations."
"So why are you yawning?" muttered Snape, momentarily distracted by the sight of the Fat Friar winking at him and disappearing around a corner in the hallway.
"My darn body clock hasn't caught up."
They walked for a while in silence until, just before entering the Great Hall, Sinistra said, "Staff meeting tomorrow?"
"As you are here now we may as well hold a brief meeting over breakfast."
Sinistra nodded and followed the Potions Master into the hall. Both of them were oblivious to the way the Headmaster and the House Spectres were watching them.
Snape and Sinistra sat together at one end of the staff table and quietly discussed their students. After Snape had got his younger colleague to agree that she wouldn't throw Draco Malfoy off the Astronomy Tower if he pinched her backside again, they moved onto the subject of Neville Longbottom.
Snape's gloat over having outdone Sinistra's good deed was interrupted by the arrival of the food and the mail.
"Not another one," groaned Aurora as her great-uncle's elderly owl dropped a letter on her plate. "Why won't he just give up?"
Beside her Snape blinked in surprise at the letter in his hand. Why in the world was she writing to him? With foreboding he ripped open the letter.
The sentence Snape yelled two minutes later contained so many of the schools forbidden swear words that a shocked Professor Dumbledore said, "Twenty points from Slytherin, Severus! And," he said fiercely to the students, "if I hear of any variation of that phrase being said by any student their house will instantly lose twenty points! Per Word!"
The students chattering became even louder when Professor Sinistra dropped the letter she was reading, pulled her hat off her head and clamped it over her mouth. Her screaming was barely muffled by the cloth.
To be continued.
Part 4
--------------------------------
"Is everyone here?" Sir Nicholas de Mimsy-Porpington said officiously.
"The Baron has yet to arrive, Sir Nicholas," the Grey Lady's quiet voice wafted across the classroom.
"Well if he doesn't hurry up we'll start the meeting without him." Sir Nicholas replied and nodded so firmly that his head fell, mostly, off.
"Oh, do keep your head on," chuckled the Fat Friar.
"Ha! Ha! You know," grumbled Sir Nicholas, "that joke was old when Dumbledore was a child."
"That recently?" the Fat Friar grinned.
The conversation came to a halt when the Bloody Baron drifted through the far wall. He surveyed his fellow spectres and raised his left eyebrow, sardonically.
"I've always wondered," quipped Sir Nicholas, "is being able to do that a prerequisite for joining Slytherin?"
The Baron lowered his left eyebrow and raised his right one. He leered evilly at Sir Nicholas.
"Gentlemen," said the Grey Lady quietly. "Kindly behave like the Noble Ghosts you are and not like a pair of schoolboys fighting over an orange."
"An orange?" Sir Nick asked.
"They were all the rage when I was corporeal," sniffed the Grey Lady.
"Must've been a while ago," muttered Sir Nick, earning himself icy stares from the other three spectres. "My apologies, my lady, it's just I was expecting you to say a 'chocolate frog'. The children these days seem to thrive on them."
"It's the cards you know, they..." the Fat Friar's words were interrupted by the Bloody Baron.
"Forget the frogs."
"Oh, yes. Certainly my lord Baron." The Fat Friar adjusted his cowl and said, "Right-o, I call to order the first meeting of the GHOULS Society and..."
"Ghouls?" Sir Nicholas spluttered.
"Really, how could you address us as common Ghouls?" murmured the Grey Lady, sounding very like Professor Trelawney when she wasn't getting her way.
"Ghosts Helping Our Unwed Lonely Slytherins," said the Fat Friar patiently.
Sir Nicholas snorted, "Better not let Professor Snape hear that one. I don't know about you but I don't fancy meeting another Basilisk."
"Forget the name," hissed the Bloody Baron commandingly. "I want to get this over with before Peeves wrecks the castle."
"Very well," said the Grey Lady. "I shall chair the meeting." She looked at the three male spectres and waited for Sir Nicholas to stop fidgeting, before she added, "As I understand it our plan is to use subtle methods to ensure Professors Snape and Sinistra are wed by... when, my lord Baron?"
"Before the end of the school year," whispered the Bloody Baron.
"So, we have to get them married by June." The Grey Lady said firmly. "I have been considering the matter and I have come up with a plan of attack." She pulled a large spectral parchment out of her sleeve and - ignoring Sir Nicholas's 'how'd she do that?' - she unfurled it. It was a map of Hogwarts Castle.
"As you can see, our main problem is distance. Professor Snape lurks here in the dungeons." The Grey Lady pointed to a section of the map marked 'in desperate need of Spring Cleaning'. "While Professor Sinistra hides up in the Astronomy Tower." She pointed to a tower marked 'Shift workers - do not haunt during daytime'. "Our biggest problem would seem to be getting them in the same room at the same time."
"Duh!" said the Fat Friar. He blushed pale pink, "Sorry, been around the children too much."
"It is rather obvious, my lady," added Sir Nick.
"What I was going to say, before you rudely interrupted me," the Grey Lady sniffed, "is that we need to get Professor Sinistra downstairs. Professor Snape wanders all over the lower reaches of the castle. Redirecting him should be relatively easy. Even your Sir Nicholas or the Fat Friar could do it."
"Thank you very much!" said the Friar in a hurt tone. He floated away to the far corner of the room where he sulked.
"Oh yes," added Sir Nicholas, pacing back and forth in mid-air, "we go after the dangerous one while you and the Baron go after the one who won't jinx you into another existence."
"Afraid?" sneered the Baron.
"No," replied Sir Nicholas huffily, "but I do not like to have my bravery questioned."
"Oh really! You are brave, both of you." The Grey Lady said bossily, "But you are not good dissemblers. It will take a lot of deception to get Professor Sinistra out of that tower. The Baron and I are better in that regard."
Sir Nicholas and the Fat Friar exchanged glances and nodded to each other.
"Very well, my lady," Sir Nicholas bowed and smiled, "we'll redirect Snape and you show what an expert liar you are."
Lost for words, the Grey Lady stared angrily at Sir Nicholas while the Friar chuckled and the Baron raised both his eyebrows in amusement.
"Very well," the Grey Lady said firmly. "When shall we start?"
"I have already started," the Baron replied, a cold smile on his face. "We will act tomorrow. After the letters arrive."
--------------------------------
Professor Snape was making his way to breakfast the next morning when he saw Professor Sinistra coming down the staircase. Not quite knowing why, he waited for her to catch up to him.
"Unusually early for you, Professor," Snape said quietly.
"It was cloudy last night," yawned Sinistra. "No good for making observations."
"So why are you yawning?" muttered Snape, momentarily distracted by the sight of the Fat Friar winking at him and disappearing around a corner in the hallway.
"My darn body clock hasn't caught up."
They walked for a while in silence until, just before entering the Great Hall, Sinistra said, "Staff meeting tomorrow?"
"As you are here now we may as well hold a brief meeting over breakfast."
Sinistra nodded and followed the Potions Master into the hall. Both of them were oblivious to the way the Headmaster and the House Spectres were watching them.
Snape and Sinistra sat together at one end of the staff table and quietly discussed their students. After Snape had got his younger colleague to agree that she wouldn't throw Draco Malfoy off the Astronomy Tower if he pinched her backside again, they moved onto the subject of Neville Longbottom.
Snape's gloat over having outdone Sinistra's good deed was interrupted by the arrival of the food and the mail.
"Not another one," groaned Aurora as her great-uncle's elderly owl dropped a letter on her plate. "Why won't he just give up?"
Beside her Snape blinked in surprise at the letter in his hand. Why in the world was she writing to him? With foreboding he ripped open the letter.
The sentence Snape yelled two minutes later contained so many of the schools forbidden swear words that a shocked Professor Dumbledore said, "Twenty points from Slytherin, Severus! And," he said fiercely to the students, "if I hear of any variation of that phrase being said by any student their house will instantly lose twenty points! Per Word!"
The students chattering became even louder when Professor Sinistra dropped the letter she was reading, pulled her hat off her head and clamped it over her mouth. Her screaming was barely muffled by the cloth.
To be continued.