Author's Note: I'm sorry if this chapter isn't any good, I have yet to
decide what happens to my characters. But this chapter is mostly to catch
up with Dylan and Remus. So forgive me if it sucks.
Chapter 15
While Claire wandered throughout the snowy grounds crying, Sirius sat on his bed staring at the cold unexplainable events of the past morning. He could not think; his mind had been shattered. He knew not what to think of Claire. So Sirius sat on his bed staring out the window letting his mind wander though it always found its way back to Claire.
Meanwhile the weeks passed by the two. They could not distinguish the cruel days. Instead the days passed by as quickly and as nameless as the snowflakes that fell down on their faces every time they walked outside. The snow mattered little to Sirius and Claire. For they only saw from a distance and the flakes all looked the same. But if one looked hard at the two, one could see the subtle differences between the painful days. But no one cared to look. No one saw the pain that Sirius and Claire felt. No one saw the little snowflake patterns on Claire's wrists. Or the dead look in Sirius' eyes. Each was caught up in their own world. And so Claire and Sirius were left to themselves and their painful snowflakes.
****
Not everyone was left to loneliness and pain. As Claire and Sirius suffered the school watched Lily and James fall madly in love. They saw what the two heads could not. For they thought themselves caught up in something far from love. They were still lost in their confusions. But in the students eyes Lily and James were perfect for one another. They had long forgotten the days when Lily and James were in constant feud. For now those memories seemed to have passed many long years ago.
Dylan and Remus had also caused quite a stir among Hogwarts. For all the students were waiting to see the two back together. But Dylan would not have it. She had found a new boyfriend in Ravenclaw, named Sean McElroy. He was quite handsome, with dark black hair that fell into his grey eyes. But Remus still outdid him with his sandy blonde shaggy hair and sea green eyes. He had wit and charm that Sean did not posses. But Sean was adventurous and wild much like Dylan herself. And maybe that was why she was drawn to him. For Remus had never been much for adventure.
****
Dylan leaned against the stone wall of Hogwarts before Charms. Lily and Claire had already gone in but she stood waiting as the minutes waned. The crowd of students was thinning and the bell's ring was approaching. Maybe he wouldn't come, Dylan thought to herself. She turned to go.
"Doubting me already?" a voice called from behind her.
"Perhaps," Dylan said running a hand through her hair. She turned to face him.
"Well you needn't, I'm here aren't I?" Sean said slipping a tanned arm around her waist.
"Yes, but your late and the bell is about to ring," Dylan snapped. She tried to keep up a rather angry expression but failed dismally and smiled.
"So? Feel like skipping?" Sean said.
"I don't know if I'm up for it today," she replied. Dylan really wasn't in the mood for missing her classes.
"What happened to the wild and crazy Dylan I heard about?" Sean asked knowing he'd hit a nerve. "What happened to the girl that snuck out at 3 in the morning and dumped a bucket of water on the potions master?"
"Well...I...," Dylan stammered.
"And what happened to the girl who..."
"Shut it, alright? I'm not in the mood right now," Dylan said. She was starting to get angry.
"Alright, alright, fine, be like that," Sean said turning to leave.
Just then the bell rang and the Marauders jumped through the doorway barely making it. But Remus stopped on the threshold and looked at Dylan. He caught her eyes with his and held her glance sadly. Dylan stared at him for a second, recounting everything he had meant to her. But just as she began to get worked up over him her thoughts stopped him and she remembered the pain he had caused her. She was done with him. He had had his chance and had broken her heart. He would not have another.
"You know what McElroy," she called after him. "I think I'll take you up on that offer."
She gave Remus a smirk and ran after Sean.
*****
Remus stood in the door and watched her run away. He wanted to stop her, to chase after her and make her understand. But instead he turned and followed his friends into class. Dylan could never like a werewolf he told himself hoping for reassurance. But for the first time in all his years he thought maybe she would understand. It was the look in her eyes she gave him just before she smirked. It was mingled with sadness and pride. She would not have him again. And Remus knew that.
"Moony, are you alright?" Sirius asked.
Remus glanced at James and Lily. They sat side by side happily arguing about some little infraction James had made in the charm. He noticed for the first time, how perfect they were for one another. Both were incredibly stubborn and quick to anger. But yet in each of them was a loyal heart that would never betray or bring harm to those they loved. They were not all the same though. Lily took to books and paintings; it was there she was at home something Remus could understand. He sometimes felt himself more comfortable within the realm of words. But James differed from them both, true he sometimes wrote when something came to him, but for the most part he lived with people. He understood them in ways that few could. And he could understand Lily to the point where he knew her weakness and strengths, her pros and cons. All this he knew with just a glance. James could pour into a person's heart and unlock their soul with one single glimpse. But even he had yet to uncover Lily's mystery. And so Remus sat, staring at two of his closest friends watching them, and immediately he was overcome with sadness. He longed for what they had. He ached for love. But it would never be granted to him. He was a beast.
Sirius watched Remus. And he saw his thoughts run across his face. In fact Remus was silent for so long Sirius doubted he had even heard the question.
"Moony," Sirius repeated again.
"Oh...Ahh...what?" he said looking away from Lily and James.
"Is everything ok?"
"Yes, of course it is," Remus replied turning back to his paper. He picked up a quill and began to write.
Sirius bent down too, he respected Remus' silence. He knew how hurt Remus had been when he had broken up with Dylan. He was the only one that had noticed; James was too caught up in Lily to notice his best friend's heart breaking. And that had made Sirius angry but he couldn't blame James. He really loved Lily and sometimes it blinded him, so much that he couldn't see his two best friends' pain.
*****
Dylan and Sean made their way into the Forbidden Forest. They had decided to skip the rest of the day's classes. They walked through the thick trees until they came to a clearing. The forest truly was beautiful Dylan thought to herself. The clear blue sky was shinning and then snow shinned on the trees. Sean charmed a fire and then pulled out a blanket. He charmed the blanket so that it would repel the melted snow. There they lay side by side almost as if in a trance.
"Dylan," Sean said after an hour.
"What?" she said turning over to look at him.
"You're such a cool person. I'm glad that we're going out."
"Me too," Dylan said and then she leaned over and kissed him.
When she kissed him she felt something wrong. It didn't feel right to her. Something was missing. And with that thought her mind drifted back to Remus. She remembered the way he kissed her. It felt so warm and tender. He would hold her and whisper into her ear about how amazing she was. Dylan shook her head. But he was over, he was dead to her. Now she was with Sean, someone who wanted her. So she kissed him again and tried to forget those sea green eyes.
*****
Lily was waiting impatiently in the Gryffindor common room for Dylan. She was seething with anger. How could Dylan blow off her classes? N.E.W.T.'s were upon them. How could Dylan run off with Sean? Didn't school mean anything to her? And could she not see what it was doing to Remus? Lily was about to explode. She was so wrapped up in her own thoughts that she didn't even see Remus sit down next to her.
"Lily?" Remus whispered.
"What?" Lily snapped thinking it was Dylan. But when she looked up she saw Remus looking at her. "Oh I'm sorry; I thought you were someone else. What's up?"
"Don't be angry with her," he said.
"With who?" Lily asked pretending not to understand.
"Dylan, she doesn't know what she's doing. Just let her be," he said.
"But she should know what she's doing to you. Even I can see it and I'm not even with you that much. How can she be so blind? Or is she meaning to do this?"
"Dylan is not that cruel," Remus told Lily.
"How can you say that when she's hurting you?" Lily questioned.
"Because I deserve this, I broke her heart remember," Remus said quietly.
"Why?"
"Why what?" Remus asked, now confused.
"If you loved her so much, which I know you do, why did you let her go? Why did you break her heart? She loved you too, you know. You guys were perfect," Lily said.
"Because she's better off without me," Remus told Lily.
"How can you say that? How is she better off without you? Look at what she's doing, skipping her classes. She's sad all the time, as if nothing will make her happy again. And I know; I'm her best friend. I see her hide it and put up a façade of strength," Lily said to him hoping he would give her an answer.
"It's just that...well..."
"Go on," Lily urged. She knew now how close she was to knowing. Remus had never been close to Lily, but she had always liked him the most, that is before James had come along. They were so alike in personality. And she felt comfortable talking to him.
Remus struggled with himself. He could not tell her, she would hate him. He risked everything by telling her. She could betray him and tell all the students. He could get kicked out of Hogwarts and never have a chance to go to school again. And yet as Remus thought this he looked at Lily and realized that Lily was too good a person. She would not betray him.
"I'm a werewolf."
Lily dropped her jaw. So this was his big secret, immediately everything clicked, the monthly outings with the Marauders, his nickname Moony, his monthly illness. She jumped out of her thoughts and looked at Remus. He looked nervous and was shaking. Lily gave him a stare.
"Look its ok if you don't want to be my friend anymore, just don't tell anyone please. They'll kick me out," Remus pleaded.
"Remus, I don't care. I've researched werewolves. I understand that there is a treatment. And I won't tell," Lily said and reached over and gave him a hug.
Remus looked relieved, "Thanks Lily, really. It means a lot to me."
He turned to go and walked up toward the dormitory.
*****
Dylan stood in the doorway. She had overheard everything. This was why he had left her. And immediately she was overwhelmed with guilt. He was a really good person after all. But she could not bring herself to move and comfort him. She was locked in her amazement.
Chapter 15
While Claire wandered throughout the snowy grounds crying, Sirius sat on his bed staring at the cold unexplainable events of the past morning. He could not think; his mind had been shattered. He knew not what to think of Claire. So Sirius sat on his bed staring out the window letting his mind wander though it always found its way back to Claire.
Meanwhile the weeks passed by the two. They could not distinguish the cruel days. Instead the days passed by as quickly and as nameless as the snowflakes that fell down on their faces every time they walked outside. The snow mattered little to Sirius and Claire. For they only saw from a distance and the flakes all looked the same. But if one looked hard at the two, one could see the subtle differences between the painful days. But no one cared to look. No one saw the pain that Sirius and Claire felt. No one saw the little snowflake patterns on Claire's wrists. Or the dead look in Sirius' eyes. Each was caught up in their own world. And so Claire and Sirius were left to themselves and their painful snowflakes.
****
Not everyone was left to loneliness and pain. As Claire and Sirius suffered the school watched Lily and James fall madly in love. They saw what the two heads could not. For they thought themselves caught up in something far from love. They were still lost in their confusions. But in the students eyes Lily and James were perfect for one another. They had long forgotten the days when Lily and James were in constant feud. For now those memories seemed to have passed many long years ago.
Dylan and Remus had also caused quite a stir among Hogwarts. For all the students were waiting to see the two back together. But Dylan would not have it. She had found a new boyfriend in Ravenclaw, named Sean McElroy. He was quite handsome, with dark black hair that fell into his grey eyes. But Remus still outdid him with his sandy blonde shaggy hair and sea green eyes. He had wit and charm that Sean did not posses. But Sean was adventurous and wild much like Dylan herself. And maybe that was why she was drawn to him. For Remus had never been much for adventure.
****
Dylan leaned against the stone wall of Hogwarts before Charms. Lily and Claire had already gone in but she stood waiting as the minutes waned. The crowd of students was thinning and the bell's ring was approaching. Maybe he wouldn't come, Dylan thought to herself. She turned to go.
"Doubting me already?" a voice called from behind her.
"Perhaps," Dylan said running a hand through her hair. She turned to face him.
"Well you needn't, I'm here aren't I?" Sean said slipping a tanned arm around her waist.
"Yes, but your late and the bell is about to ring," Dylan snapped. She tried to keep up a rather angry expression but failed dismally and smiled.
"So? Feel like skipping?" Sean said.
"I don't know if I'm up for it today," she replied. Dylan really wasn't in the mood for missing her classes.
"What happened to the wild and crazy Dylan I heard about?" Sean asked knowing he'd hit a nerve. "What happened to the girl that snuck out at 3 in the morning and dumped a bucket of water on the potions master?"
"Well...I...," Dylan stammered.
"And what happened to the girl who..."
"Shut it, alright? I'm not in the mood right now," Dylan said. She was starting to get angry.
"Alright, alright, fine, be like that," Sean said turning to leave.
Just then the bell rang and the Marauders jumped through the doorway barely making it. But Remus stopped on the threshold and looked at Dylan. He caught her eyes with his and held her glance sadly. Dylan stared at him for a second, recounting everything he had meant to her. But just as she began to get worked up over him her thoughts stopped him and she remembered the pain he had caused her. She was done with him. He had had his chance and had broken her heart. He would not have another.
"You know what McElroy," she called after him. "I think I'll take you up on that offer."
She gave Remus a smirk and ran after Sean.
*****
Remus stood in the door and watched her run away. He wanted to stop her, to chase after her and make her understand. But instead he turned and followed his friends into class. Dylan could never like a werewolf he told himself hoping for reassurance. But for the first time in all his years he thought maybe she would understand. It was the look in her eyes she gave him just before she smirked. It was mingled with sadness and pride. She would not have him again. And Remus knew that.
"Moony, are you alright?" Sirius asked.
Remus glanced at James and Lily. They sat side by side happily arguing about some little infraction James had made in the charm. He noticed for the first time, how perfect they were for one another. Both were incredibly stubborn and quick to anger. But yet in each of them was a loyal heart that would never betray or bring harm to those they loved. They were not all the same though. Lily took to books and paintings; it was there she was at home something Remus could understand. He sometimes felt himself more comfortable within the realm of words. But James differed from them both, true he sometimes wrote when something came to him, but for the most part he lived with people. He understood them in ways that few could. And he could understand Lily to the point where he knew her weakness and strengths, her pros and cons. All this he knew with just a glance. James could pour into a person's heart and unlock their soul with one single glimpse. But even he had yet to uncover Lily's mystery. And so Remus sat, staring at two of his closest friends watching them, and immediately he was overcome with sadness. He longed for what they had. He ached for love. But it would never be granted to him. He was a beast.
Sirius watched Remus. And he saw his thoughts run across his face. In fact Remus was silent for so long Sirius doubted he had even heard the question.
"Moony," Sirius repeated again.
"Oh...Ahh...what?" he said looking away from Lily and James.
"Is everything ok?"
"Yes, of course it is," Remus replied turning back to his paper. He picked up a quill and began to write.
Sirius bent down too, he respected Remus' silence. He knew how hurt Remus had been when he had broken up with Dylan. He was the only one that had noticed; James was too caught up in Lily to notice his best friend's heart breaking. And that had made Sirius angry but he couldn't blame James. He really loved Lily and sometimes it blinded him, so much that he couldn't see his two best friends' pain.
*****
Dylan and Sean made their way into the Forbidden Forest. They had decided to skip the rest of the day's classes. They walked through the thick trees until they came to a clearing. The forest truly was beautiful Dylan thought to herself. The clear blue sky was shinning and then snow shinned on the trees. Sean charmed a fire and then pulled out a blanket. He charmed the blanket so that it would repel the melted snow. There they lay side by side almost as if in a trance.
"Dylan," Sean said after an hour.
"What?" she said turning over to look at him.
"You're such a cool person. I'm glad that we're going out."
"Me too," Dylan said and then she leaned over and kissed him.
When she kissed him she felt something wrong. It didn't feel right to her. Something was missing. And with that thought her mind drifted back to Remus. She remembered the way he kissed her. It felt so warm and tender. He would hold her and whisper into her ear about how amazing she was. Dylan shook her head. But he was over, he was dead to her. Now she was with Sean, someone who wanted her. So she kissed him again and tried to forget those sea green eyes.
*****
Lily was waiting impatiently in the Gryffindor common room for Dylan. She was seething with anger. How could Dylan blow off her classes? N.E.W.T.'s were upon them. How could Dylan run off with Sean? Didn't school mean anything to her? And could she not see what it was doing to Remus? Lily was about to explode. She was so wrapped up in her own thoughts that she didn't even see Remus sit down next to her.
"Lily?" Remus whispered.
"What?" Lily snapped thinking it was Dylan. But when she looked up she saw Remus looking at her. "Oh I'm sorry; I thought you were someone else. What's up?"
"Don't be angry with her," he said.
"With who?" Lily asked pretending not to understand.
"Dylan, she doesn't know what she's doing. Just let her be," he said.
"But she should know what she's doing to you. Even I can see it and I'm not even with you that much. How can she be so blind? Or is she meaning to do this?"
"Dylan is not that cruel," Remus told Lily.
"How can you say that when she's hurting you?" Lily questioned.
"Because I deserve this, I broke her heart remember," Remus said quietly.
"Why?"
"Why what?" Remus asked, now confused.
"If you loved her so much, which I know you do, why did you let her go? Why did you break her heart? She loved you too, you know. You guys were perfect," Lily said.
"Because she's better off without me," Remus told Lily.
"How can you say that? How is she better off without you? Look at what she's doing, skipping her classes. She's sad all the time, as if nothing will make her happy again. And I know; I'm her best friend. I see her hide it and put up a façade of strength," Lily said to him hoping he would give her an answer.
"It's just that...well..."
"Go on," Lily urged. She knew now how close she was to knowing. Remus had never been close to Lily, but she had always liked him the most, that is before James had come along. They were so alike in personality. And she felt comfortable talking to him.
Remus struggled with himself. He could not tell her, she would hate him. He risked everything by telling her. She could betray him and tell all the students. He could get kicked out of Hogwarts and never have a chance to go to school again. And yet as Remus thought this he looked at Lily and realized that Lily was too good a person. She would not betray him.
"I'm a werewolf."
Lily dropped her jaw. So this was his big secret, immediately everything clicked, the monthly outings with the Marauders, his nickname Moony, his monthly illness. She jumped out of her thoughts and looked at Remus. He looked nervous and was shaking. Lily gave him a stare.
"Look its ok if you don't want to be my friend anymore, just don't tell anyone please. They'll kick me out," Remus pleaded.
"Remus, I don't care. I've researched werewolves. I understand that there is a treatment. And I won't tell," Lily said and reached over and gave him a hug.
Remus looked relieved, "Thanks Lily, really. It means a lot to me."
He turned to go and walked up toward the dormitory.
*****
Dylan stood in the doorway. She had overheard everything. This was why he had left her. And immediately she was overwhelmed with guilt. He was a really good person after all. But she could not bring herself to move and comfort him. She was locked in her amazement.