I really appreciate my readers for coming this far. I really thought I would lose many people by now, and even reviews in the 20's are a surprise for me. I could not thank you enough for what you guys have given me. I love you all.

On a small note, colds are the worst. I woke up this morning and I have a stuffed nose, dry throat, and all that good cold stuff. When I get colds, I usually have a hard time writing a story. However, I hope I can make this one work out. I am determined!

Gravitation © Maki Murakami

ANGEL DUST

Chapter 6

The darkness was eternal, covering up any shade of color to the human eye. Everything was so quiet, not even a small ringing of the eardrums were to be called upon. Death was the only relative thing this feeling could be compared to. Even if there were sight, only darkness would be found. He could hear nothing, not even his own breath masking in front of him. He could only depend on touch, and there was a smooth, warm feeling surrounding his entire body. Ryuichi could feel the starchy sleep in his eyes, forcing himself not to open his eyes. He was afraid what he may see once he unclothed his eyes. He may find himself where he should not be, or with somebody he should not be escorted by. On instinct, his slender eyes cracked open slowly, hoping to find everything completely normal around him. His eyelids brushed against his oculars twice at what he faced.

  A light blue, rigid surface blinded him. It had a resemblance to an ocean's wave, with some light deeming into it. It felt soft to the touch and was warm against his sensitive body. He grabbed the substance, which was his covers, and pulled it away from his lineaments and to his lower exchequer. His body felt like he ran through a fire, parched and irritated. His fingers felt numb as they ran through his silky hair, crossing over his forehead. A deep banging clustered his head, feeling like a large migraine of some sort.

"Ouch," he wheezed as he quickly trickled his fingers across his forehead. The tenement he was staying in was familiar, and he recognized it as his own room. His senses were relieved at the sights of his room, glad he was not somewhere he should not be. What had happened last night? He did not really remember coming home after the concert, but found himself in the safe counseling of his sheets. Rolling himself over on his side, his pupils magnified from surprise once he saw the figure before his face.

   "Kumagorou!" he exclaimed through a silent voice once he found his favorite bunny lying next to him. "I wonder what happened last night," he asked him, rubbing his hands on his soft, pink fabric body. His black, button eyes gazed at Ryuichi, giving him an innocent look, as if he did not know what happened neither. "Well, how about we go and get some breakfast?" he grabbed the bunny and pushed his head down in a nod, smiling at his agreement. He got to his feet, sliding himself out of bed with Kumagorou clutched in his hand. Dizziness consumed him, almost making him fall back to the bed, but he regained his balance soon enough. He shook his head and continued out of his room, ignoring the fact his room was much tidier then what it usually is.

   The stairs creaked from the pressure of Ryuichi's feet stepping down and off them. He carried on a conversation with Kumagorou on what they would be eating once they made it into the kitchen. At the end of the stairway, Ryuichi hoped down onto the carpet and hummed along his way. His ladder migraine was gone, disappearing without a trace. However, he still had a small headache that he was being oblivious to, not wanting it to ruin his day. A smile would not leave his face, presumably, because of the whole misunderstanding he and Tatsuha were having was finally resolved, and everything was back to normal.

Jaunty and hopefully, Sakuma Ryuichi was finally back to his senses. However, in a way, he felt fuller of energy than he has ever had before. Everything was going just the way he wanted it to. His feet slowed down to a much longer pace once he heard an almost inaudible sound. He looked both ways, seeing nothing that could have possibly made some kind of racket. The noise was heard again and this time, Ryuichi got a little frightened, stiffing up.

 "Noriko?" he asked, hoping that his commanding, risqué friend would jump out before him with a smile. At the scène of no answer, he held onto Kumagorou tighter to his chest. The noise he once heard suddenly could not be heard anymore. What he remembered, it sounded like the rubbing of some kind of cloth. It was a queer noise to his ears and made him curious. Breakfast could wait for a little investigation; it was his house he had to defend, after all. He quietly tiptoed his way across the hallway, making it to his living room. Back pressed against the wall, he dared not to look inside the room, thinking their could be a murderer.

 "Just one look," he swallowed a hard amount of saliva, proceeding to look over to doorway into the living counters. What he saw was someone on his couch, sprawled out in an outstretched manner, clasping a pillow to his face with a wide-open mouth. His legs were practically falling off the couch, while one arm already was. His clothes were in need for ironing, and his raven locks hung over his face, sticking to his cheeks. On the coffee table next to the occupied couch, many of his possessions were on it. An open cigarette carton stood next to a pair of keys that must have been his. His red lighter must have been tossed onto the table, seeing as it was almost to the other side of the small table.

 He shifted in his sleep quickly, rubbing his socked feet together, letting out a small groan.

 "Oh my god," Ryuichi brought his back to the wall once again, looking discomfited, "what is Tatsuha doing on my couch? Could he have actually slept over?" he puzzled over the unknown events that might have happened last night for the boy to end up on his couch. A sudden chill ran through his spine, causing fright to appear onto his now white face. "Oh no," he staggered, "could I have, we have..."

 Ryuichi felt his mind go dizzy, thinking of what they must have done. He tried so hard to remember what happened last night, but he could not remember anything! He could only imagine all the things they must have done together once they reached his household. Kissing with dominance, rubbing each other spicily, touching their foreign regions in pure ecstasy, and then intercourse. How could he let all of that happen?

"Morning," an anonymous person greeted him to his left, causing him to leap from shock. Once he turned to see who the person was, he was even more shocked to see Tatsuha standing there, giving him a gratuitous look. He must have gotten up and walked over to see him against the wall while he was overreacting about last night.

  "Tatsuha!" Ryuichi shouted at his very presence, not knowing how to act with him now. He fumbled with words and just decided to avoid looking at him. He would rather not know what happened last night at all.

  The taller male nictitated his deep, raven eyes at his weird behavior. He stretched out his masculine arms, letting a yawn escape his mouth. Without any delay, he decided to break the ice between them. "Do you want any breakfast?"

      The two sat at the kitchen table, breakfast before them. They said nothing to one another, and both kind of did not dare to look at one another, afraid of what the other may say. Ryuichi would slowly eat a scoop of his cereal and look at Kumagorou, who he placed on the table next to his bowl. Tatsuha, on the other hand, acted as if it was just another normal morning. He would take a bite from his dashimaki tamago; look around the room, collecting the sights to his memory. To be in Sakuma Ryuichi's house, eating breakfast in his kitchen. It was all a dream come true, but Sakuma Ryuichi himself seemed to not even be alive now. It was a good thought about being in his house, but Ryuichi was an even higher quality. Seeing him like that made the whole experience worthless to Tatsuha.

 "What," Ryuichi finally started to say, his eyes traveling across the table, "what happened last night?"

  Tatsuha took another bite from his dashimaki tamago, chewed it before swallowing and looked at the man with wonder, "What do you mean?"

  "After the concert," Ryuichi reminded him, looking into his deep eyes. He could hardly bring himself to what he wanted to say, too bashful and scared to know. "You apologized to me and everything, but I can hardly remember anything else."

   Tatsuha put his fork down on his plate and let out a large exhale, "I knew I would have to tell you sooner or later," he leaned back in his chair with a face full of guilt. He saw the thirty-one year old hold his spoon tighter, knowing he was afraid of what may have happened. "Due to the fact we were friends again, Noriko found it perfectly appropriate for us to celebrate: drinks, dancing, the works of a regular outing. I was a little wary, but I agreed to it."

   "That's it?" Ryuichi dropped his spoon, his mouth almost dropped at the explaining. He had suspected so much more than what he was just told, and in a way, seemed a little disappointed. "What about my headache this morning then? And you were sleeping on my couch."

   "That was all a result from the party," he informed. "You drank a little too much, got a little crazy and could not have possibly have made it home by yourself. Seeing as I hardly drank anything, I gave you a ride on my motorcycle after receiving directions from Noriko." He giggled at the shorter, yet older male, "your headache was only a hangover. You sure can't handle your alcohol, Sakuma-san"

Ryuichi ignored the rest of what the younger boy was saying, and sunk into his chair. "Thank God. I thought maybe we had sexual intercourse or something," he grabbed Kumagorou and started to fumble with him.

  "Sex?" Tatsuha spitted, his eyes as big as plates. He could not believe his own ears, hearing such a thought from Sakuma Ryuichi. He could not believe that his very own God was thinking of him in such an intimate way, but then again, they did kiss after their apologies. "It is a nice sentiment, but I wouldn't take advantage of you when you are intoxicated." Tatsuha flinched after those very words, knowing damn well that he would take advantage of anyone if they were. In fact, why did he not last night?

 "Oh, I see." Ryuichi felt so relieved after knowing everything, and was glad nothing too far between them happened. He could not really see himself with a guy, really. "Wait, I kissed you." He reminded himself aloud.

  "Yeah," the boy gave him an awkward glance, "you did. What is so important about it? It was the only thing we did."

 "What?" his nerves darted and his heartbeat grew rapid, "You just said we didn't have sex!"

       Tatsuha motioned for him to calm down, counseling his fervent attitude, "We didn't. We kissed and touched each other, but don't worry, nowhere bad." Taking the last bite of his breakfast, he smiled at him. "Thanks for your autograph by the way."

 "Your welcome," Ryuichi pouted, still acting immature about the whole deal the night before. "My writing is hardly readable, so sorry about that."

   "No problem," Tatsuha grinned, "It isn't even for me anyway."

Ryuichi took his bowl and placed it in the dishwasher carefully, "really?" he asked, dumbfounded. It was strange of someone to ask for his autograph and not even be for him or her. He walked over to get eye to eye with the reclined Tatsuha, scanning every feature of his handsome face. "Who is it for?"

     "A friend of mine," he tried to settle it at just that, not wanting to get in very big detail. "This friend of mine is a huge fan of yours, says that you are their idol." At that moment, he felt a sting of pain and hatred trigger in his brain. He almost forgot about the whole engagement between him and Miyu until he started thinking about her. What was he going to do now?

    "Idol, huh?" Ryuichi smiled with amusement, soaking in the thought. He acted as if no one ever thought of him as his or her idol before, "can I meet your friend sometime?"

    "No," Tatsuha countered quickly with a spike of hate in his voice, "I don't really even want to see her." He stood up, taking his empty plate and put it in the dishwater just as Ryuichi did before. He did not even look at Ryuichi as he walked past him and back into the living room.

  "What's wrong?" Ryuichi acknowledged his odd behavior. Once he was happy, and now he was acting like a completely different person. Grabbing Kumagorou and following Tatsuha into the room, he saw him gathering his things. "Tatsuha," he spoke, making sure Tatsuha knew he was standing there, "what is wrong? Are you and your friend fighting?"

Tatsuha grabbed his keys and put them into his pocket. Without even looking at his God, he replied, "You could say that. It is more complex than that, though." Not wanting to talk about the subject any longer, he put on his coat, shoving his cigarettes in his pocket, and turned to look at him. "It's been fun, Sakuma-san. I feel a lot better now that I apologized."

 Ryuichi watched Tatsuha with worried eyes, wondering what he meant about his friend, why he was acting like this. He knew nothing of his newfound friend he just made up with the other night. For him to act like this, it seemed just like having a weird stranger in your house for the night. Then, that stranger just leaves without any objection to him whatsoever. He could not just let him leave, and possibly never see him again. "Before you leave," Ryuichi began, getting his attention. "I want to take up on your offer."

 "Offer?" Tatsuha asked with no idea on what he was talking about. Had he said something to him during their celebration and Ryuichi only remembered?

 Ryuichi gave a giant nod, making Kumagorou do the same as him in unison. "Yes," he pointed to Tatsuha cutely, trying to break the large amount of tension. "You said that we should go to the zoo again, dressed just like we did before. In addition, you said we could go out for ice cream. I accept!"

  "I did not," Tatsuha pointed out negatively, "I said that we could probably go out for ice cre—" he cut himself off on purpose before continuing what he was saying, "and then you kissed me before I could finish."

   "Shut up," Ryuichi blushed intensely, not being able to take the fact of being reminded. He knew what Tatsuha meant before he kissed him, so he just said what he knew what he was going to say. "If you don't want to, just say so." With a swift turn of his feet, he turned his back to Tatsuha.

   "I'd love to," he replied with concern. He watched with the same emotion as Ryuichi turned around to face him with a joyful smile, excited to know he agreed. "We will go on Saturday, okay?"

    "Okay!"

    "I can't wait."

 Once Tatsuha reached his house in the quiet town of Kyoto, he could finally think about everything that just happened. To be in Sakuma Ryuichi's own house was like a long-life dream of any fan, and it was much more then what he had expected. In fact, it seemed perfectly normal. It was nothing like the famous star's houses you see on television: large, beautiful, and full of million dollar items that they did not even need. His house seemed so plain and regular, almost like a normal man's household. It was a good size, but nothing too flashy was concealed on the inside of it, except for maybe the few tad-bit items, such as plasma screen televisions, or some furniture. Oh, and his ocean of toys he found in his bedroom as he brought him to his bed the night before. Good thing he cleaned it up a little bit.

The whole house had a scent to it that put himself at ease, made him feel at home. Everything just welcomed him in a weird kind of sense. Nevertheless, to his wonderful home, something seemed missing.

It was so quiet among his commorancy. For being rich, handsome, and famous, he sure lacked camaraderie within his walls. After lying himself on the couch, he noticed how empty it looked and how it seemed to never have had someone unknown there before. The thought of Ryuichi having hardly any friends was almost unbelievable, but it seemed almost that way. Was Ryuichi always that alone?

 "Tatsuha-kun," the normal, dulcet female voice that always called to him was surprisingly downcast and troubled. Miyu must have been wondering where her fiancé went for the entire night after finding out about their engagement, and not returning until the morning.

  "Don't talk to me," he retorted to her, not being able to stand her face at all. He took out a piece of paper, threw in on the floor and stomped his way into the kitchen. "Just take this and leave."

Miyu wanted to break down and cry at his actions, not knowing what she had done wrong. Did he not understand what she meant to him? He really did not care for her feelings. With a small howl, she picked up the paper he tossed, unknowing of what it was and looked at it. Now of seeing what was written, she let out a pegh.

The autograph of her idol, Sakuma Ryuichi was actually in her very own hands. The very essence of the man could still be felt on the composition, making her want to faint. "Tatsuha," she panted with little talk, knowing he told her not to talk to him. She could not be obedient to his demand of her to leave after he had given her this, remembering her request. Through all that exterior of the boy who said he could care less about the feelings of the women he gets in bed with, there always was a sweet, endearing man who would do anything for a loved one. Maybe he did care about her feelings.

   "Why did you get this for me?" she asked, reaching the kitchen to look at the boy, drinking straight from a whole milk carton.

     "I don't know," Tatsuha lied plainly. "It seemed like a nice thought at the time."

Miyu sulked down, still wondering about one thing, "where were you all last night?"

     "Out."

     "Out where?" Miyu started to raise her voice, not wanting to make things that difficult. She was just worried about him, after all. Her teeth started to grind on pure instinct once her desired beaux put the carton in the refrigerator, shut it, and walked right passed her. "This is all because of our engagement, isn't it?" her voice was now sour and low. By the sudden stop of his footsteps, she knew that made him pause, signaling that she was right. Miyu did not dare look at him in the eyes, knowing she would only be rejected.

     "Yes," Tatsuha responded flatly, caring nothing of what she felt and continued to walk towards his room, "it is."

 Miyu looked down at her small, white socks tucked on her feet, squirming them in her own nervousness. To hear what she just heard was almost unbearable for her to hold her tears. Never did she want to know how mad Tatsuha would be to know how much she felt for him. "Why?" she began, "why are you so upset about it?"

     "We're cousins," Tatsuha stopped his beating feet once more to inform her how he felt, "it's just wrong."

   "So it's wrong that I love you?" Miyu stomped her left foot, letting a teardrop fall from her sweet eyes. She ran over to him, facing him with a cruel, hurt face. "Besides, we are only distant cousins by marriage! We aren't even really related, Tatsuha-kun!"
 Tatsuha looked down at her face, feeling like someone had shot him right through the heart three times. He really did worry her. It was strange for him to know someone was actually caring for him that much, "Miyu, you know how much I hate getting tangled up with possessive women."

 "I won't be!" she shrieked, grabbing onto his arm, drenching it with her tears. "I love you Tatsuha-kun, and I thought you knew and understood that. I just want to be with you forever, to love your more and more each day! Is there something wrong with that?"

Tatsuha could feel his whole body turn into ice for a second, but to be replaced with a roaring flame. He jerked his arm away from the crying, adoring girl before him. He looked at the girl's flooding eyes and the shock he saw go through her whole, entire body at his actions. "There is something wrong with that," he replied harshly, brisk heat in his breaths. He ignored her aggressive shakes of her head, and her curling of her bottom lip. "I do not, and will never love you in that sense. It will be pointless for me to marry someone I feel nothing for, causing myself to act something out that I am not."

"You already do," she screamed at him, making him stop his entire speech. The tears and constant hiccups did not stop her from telling him how she felt. "Don't come to me, preaching on about being something you are not, Tatsuha-kun. Because of all people, that is exactly what you do daily. You spend your time with women, pretending to be their lover and boyfriend, when you are not. Your whole entire life is a lie." Her voice became soft and emotional once more, "I just want to be help you become something much better."

As her hands started to progress to Tatsuha's face, possibly to caress his face, they were slapped away with a sharp force of Tatsuha's hand. His eyes gave her the coldest, gimlet look possible. "Don't you fucking act like you know everything about me. You act as if you know too much about me, but you know nothing."

   "Tatsuha-kun," she whimpered, cradling her now red hand. The tears stained her blue jeans and sent out a salty aroma between the two of them. "Why do you hate me?"

"I don't," Tatsuha defended himself from being a total asshole. He already felt like one already after all he had said and done to her. "I just don't love you, Miyu. I'm sorry."

She sniffed quickly, whipping away her tears with her long sleeve, feeling like a total baby. "I'm sorry, too." She chocked, feeling a large lump in her throat. Once more, she would have to lie to Tatsuha. She was not sorry for what she said, but honest. Her love for him was eternal and she would never let it die, for it seemed impossible. To be this close to him, as friends and have sexual contact every night was enough for her at the remaining moment. The engagement was not to be called off, for his father would forbid it. The only way to accomplish this was to make him love her, and she was more than happy to do so.

 She knew Tatsuha would be hers eventually.

   "Time off?" Tohma's eyes focused on his male band mate, wondering why he would suddenly ask about time off.

 Ryuichi had Kumagorou in his arms, waving him around. For Ryuichi, it was appropriate for him to come all the way to Tohma's house to ask for such a small thing. "Yeah," he said, putting on the best puppy-eyed look he could come up with, "only for tomorrow, Tohma-kun. We did well at the concert last night, so I should be able to have an award."

"I'm not saying you can't," Tohma smiled at his premonition of decline. "You may have time off tomorrow, but that means we will have to work on Sunday."

 "Yeah!" he squeaked with revering happiness, glad to know he could attend to the zoo. "I can't wait to go with him," he thought aloud.

 "With him?" Tohma jumped at his sentence, "you are going somewhere on your time off?"

 "Well, yeah," Ryuichi groaned, making it seem like it was the most obvious thing to do on your time off. "Tatsuha-kun and I are going to go to the zoo again."

 Tohma smiled at his jaunty friend and went back to his paper work, glad to see they were not on bad terms anymore. "Again? Man, he is full of ideas."

"We are going to wear our costumes again, too!"

 "Like I said, 'he is full of ideas'."

  Friday came a little too quick for some, and for others it seemed like an eternity. Tatsuha could hardly hold in all of his excitement, thinking about all of the activities he and Ryuichi would do at the zoo, all the time they would spend together. They may also be able to go and see a movie together!

 "I'm leaving," Tatsuha said to the solemn house, hoping his father would hear him. After receiving nothing in return, he shrugged and opened to door with an ostentatious smile. However, that smile faded from surprise after he saw someone outside of the door that he did not expect.

 "Tatsuha-kun," the individual greeted.

 Children ran about the zoo, screaming and cheerful about seeing the many animals. The exotic calls from the wild birds could be heard not too far away and the scenery was a good touch for the atmosphere. Cages holding animals were placed all over the park in their own destinations, along with the many gift shops. Nevertheless, Tatsuha was far away from the wilderness.

   "Hurry up," he snarled as he waited outside of one of the public bathrooms. His attitude seemed more or less of anger and vexation. One of his hands rubbed against his raven hair, causing it to spread across his face and his mysterious, attracting eyes. Looking down at his attire, he was only wearing normal every-day clothes, deciding not to wear his bear costume. Although he felt full of regret, he sighed and thought that maybe it was for the better.

 "What are you doing?" asked a paltry voice next to him, having a large hint of curiosity flowing from it.

 Tatsuha recognized that voice and blushed, thinking about how stupid he must have looked standing outside the bathroom, waiting for something. "Sakuma-san," he yelped, surprised to see him there already, waiting for him with his bunny costume in hand.

"Ryuichi," the man curled up his lip, making it noticeable that he wanted to be called that very name. After getting that point across to the younger man, he scanned his outfit, "why are you not wearing your bear suit?"

 Tatsuha stiffened at his peculiar question, eying the bathroom door, hoping that it would stay shut for a hopeful hour or so. "Well," he tried to tell him but all his words come out in mumbles, "there were a few difficulties. I left my outfit in the wash, so I could not bring it." Tatsuha knew his lie would go through to Ryuichi, and put on the best convincing smile.

 "That's too bad," Ryuichi was obviously disappointed in his friend's predicament and placed his costume down. "I won't wear mine either so you won't feel left out." He winked at Tatsuha, failing to see the blush on his face, "what animal do you want to go see first?"

 Just as Tatsuha was about to say the name of a creature, someone twirled out of the bathroom and latched themselves onto his masculine arm, giggling all the while. "I'm sorry I took so long, my makeup would not cooperate with me."

 Tatsuha felt himself go lightheaded at that very moment and wanted to just die. He thought everything today was going to go so well on his date with Ryuichi. He planned everything out, knew all the places that they would go to together, but he did not plan on another member to tag along. "Miyu," he coughed with the most abhorrence in his voice, forcing the girl off his arm. He twisted his neck around to apologize to Ryuichi about the interruption and was a little mind billowed at his facial expression. Ryuichi was staring at Miyu with the most mixed emotions in his eyes. He seemed to have thought her intrusion was a little bit too rude, jumping onto Tatsuha and everything, but he was also a little curious on who the woman was.

 "Ryuichi," Tatsuha tried to smooth the confusion down with his voice so he could introduce him to Miyu.

 "Sakuma Ryuichi!?" Miyu's whole body was quickly turned to the vocalist in a small whirlwind, "For real?" her shimmering eyes soon got a lot more sparkling and grew to an enormous size after actually facing him upfront. Her whole face turned a certain crimson color and her knees started to go out on her, "Oh my god, it is really Sakuma-sama."

 With a groan and a roll of his eyes, Tatsuha continued to introduce her. "Ryuichi, this is my dear friend Miyu," he strained out those words of 'dear friend', trying to make himself look good in front of Ryuichi. "She is the person I got your autograph for."

The explanation hit Ryuichi like a hard rock, causing him to give a round lipped pattern, as if to say 'Oh'. After that, he smiled that genuine smile as he always does and waved at Miyu with courtesy, "Hi Miyu."

 "He said my name," Miyu screamed aloud, thinking that this was the best day of her entire life. She got right into his face, talking so fast for even herself. "I can't believe it is really you! You are my idol, Sakuma-sama. I want to grow up and be a great singer, just like you someday. I have every CD that you have every sold out, even the ones from America when you went solo. Even though I cannot understand them, they are so beautiful. You are so wonderful."

"Thanks," Ryuichi chirped, getting excited from all the praise he was getting. "I work hard a lot and I am glad my work pays off. Which reminds me, I have to go to work tomorrow!" he started to pout, biting down on his sleeve, tears forming in his eyes.

 Miyu giggled, "You are so cute, Sakuma-sama! I thought you would be really cold and serious, just like the way you act on stage or something."

 "How do you know Tatsuha-kun?" Ryuichi quickly changed the subject and going into deeper water. The both of them did not even notice the gasp from the boy behind them, knowing exactly what Miyu would say.

 "Me?" Miyu chortled, pulling her hair back with charisma. "What about you? How do you know him?"

Tatsuha froze, not believing what he just heard. Miyu actually did not bring up anything about an engagement between them, avoiding it completely. He actually wanted to go up and kiss her for that very thing.

 "We are friends from awhile back," he confirmed her.

"So are we," Miyu was surprised to know the exact same relationship the two had with the same person. Enthusiastic, she tugged on his small hand and started to walk towards the caged animals, "Let's go and talk some more!"

Ryuichi, childish as always, smiled delightfully at his newfound friend and gave a quick nod in reply. He turned his head quickly to face his other friend, "come on Tatsuha!"

"What am I," Tatsuha questioned to himself, following the two, "a dog?"

 "It is kind of hard really," Miyu watched one of the tigers walk over and lie down in the shade of a tree inside its exhibit. Ryuichi was squirming around in his shoes as he watched the animals, eating his ice cream cone. He made a slight pause after she spoke, turning his head to her. She spoke of something when there was no conversation before that, as if trying to get on a subject.

  "What is?"

Lowering her head to take a drink from the straw stuck in her soda, she tried to cover up any emotion on her face before telling him, "To want to be with someone that does not love you," she tried to say with a normal tone but it came out rather flat.

"Oh," Ryuichi had nothing really to say in response, not wanting to make anything worse, "I'm sorry."

"It's okay," Miyu rested her chin in her smooth palm, watching the two tiger mates snuggle their muzzles together. "It must be nice though. Being with the person you love most, having them feel the exact same for you. It makes me sad to know I will never have that in the sense that I want it to be. In a way, I want to cry about it," almost on cue, she brought her hand to wipe a small tear forming in her eye. Instead of bawling as any other girl would, she just smiled. "Look at me, crying in front of Sakuma Ryuichi."

Ryuichi started to see red, knowing he was panicking in a way of not knowing what to do or say to her. He has never really been in love, or had someone not love him back when he felt it for him or her. Looking behind him, he saw Tatsuha leaning over a rail with his arms, looking at the panda exhibit. "I'll be right back," Ryuichi informed her with a pat on her shoulders and walked over to Tatsuha, standing next to him. Saying nothing to the younger man, he noticed he was also not looking at him. Ryuichi just started to act natural, as if he had been there for the past twenty minutes.

"Hi," Tatsuha spoke up without even giving him a glance. The pandas must have been much more interested than Ryuichi now.

"Tatsuha-kun," he began, licking the sweetness from the cone. "I hope Amori-chan will be okay," he addressed Miyu by her family name only, making Tatsuha remember the distance between relativity they really are.

"She is a tough girl," an arrogant remark from the younger male's lips.

"Yeah," Ryuichi mused the fact, taking note of her somewhat tomboy attitude, despite her elegant beauty. "But dealing with what she is dealing with is hard for anyone. You know, not receiving love from someone you give to."

Tatsuha took interest from that quote, looking at a little nervous. He decided to put the pandas on hold and put his full attention to the beautiful male before him, "Really? Is that all she told you?"

 "It is," Ryuichi leaned against the rail just as Tatsuha was, "I feel sorry for her. I have never really loved someone, so I can just imagine how much her heart is aching. It must make life pretty worthless."

Tatsuha grunted at all the talk of how Miyu must feel, and letting his emotions subside. "It is not always just about just one person's feelings," he tried to explain while keeping his voice from yelling to not make it obvious, "the other person has feelings about it too, I am sure. He might not love her; in fact, he might just like someone else. Imagine how he must feel, trying to be forced to love someone when his heart is captured by another," feeling proud of himself, he stuck out his chest.

"True," Ryuichi countered, "then that person should really straighten things out so all the feuding would end. I mean, he should go and tell Miyu whom he loves and then go and explain everything, along with confessing his feelings for that person."

Once again, the pandas seemed more interesting than Ryuichi to Tatsuha. Turning his head to the black and white bears, he found himself in a bind. How could he tell Miyu and Ryuichi everything without confusion and more feuding? Miyu would understand his feelings for Ryuichi; Tatsuha had had a fascination on the man for years now. However, would she let him go? Probably not. Nevertheless, there was also Ryuichi. How would he take it to find out that the man Miyu was talking about was indeed Tatsuha Himself? Double the delight to know he could not love Miyu because he wanted him instead.

"Kiss me," Ryuichi's words came out swift and nervously. His shoes were kicking the ground in embarrassment, and his face was beet red. Trying to avoid eye contact with Tatsuha was almost impossible now.

 "I can't," Tatsuha swallowed hard, looking behind him at the girl who was looking at the tigers still. Tatsuha may be eager to sweep Ryuichi off his feet and lock lips with him anytime; however, he has a lot more consideration than to do it in front of Miyu, especially when he knows the consequences.

 "Please?" Ryuichi started to plead, turning to Tatsuha and tugging at his blue shirt. To be that desperate for a kiss must have been bugging him ever since he came to the zoo and saw the monk. "Is it because we are out in public or something? No one will care," need started to fill his eyes, along with a few forming salty tears. Tugging harder and harder at his shirt was starting agitate Tatsuha but also made him want to kiss Ryuichi more as he begged for his lips on his own.

  "It is not because of that," Tatsuha grabbed a hold of the vocalist's shoulders, making him stop the tugging. Looking into his beautiful eyes made him much weaker to his pleading. He looked over at Miyu once more, "well, it is kind of because of it a little."

 "That did not stop you from kissing me before," Ryuichi reminded him of the night after the concert. "I just want one kiss, even a little one. Ever since you stayed the night at my house, we haven't kissed or anything."

 "So?"

 "I miss it," cooing softly, Ryuichi took his curled fingers off of Tatsuha's shirt and got to his tiptoes, bringing himself to good height with Tatsuha. Without any more hesitation, Ryuichi leaned in to bring his sweet, small lips to Tatsuha's hard, yet smooth ones. Closing his eyes, Tatsuha kept his to full alert but only to Ryuichi's face, which would make motions of pure ecstasy. Pulling Ryuichi close made their bodies tremble for a short second before conjoining them in warm heat. All the while, Tatsuha took his hands of his shoulders and gradually started brining them down to his sides, tickling vibrations with his fingertips amongst his skin.

It was true; no one really seemed to care for the two kissing. They would either try to ignore, or just leave them be, walking right pass them. As long as Ryuichi kept digging deeper into their kiss, Tatsuha was truly ethereal.

 "Ryuichi," Tatsuha groaned after the kiss was broken up between the two and they just stood, looking at one another.

Ryuichi seemed a little bashful for the first few minutes after their kiss, but soon smiled at him as if he forgot the whole thing completely, "let's go see the capybaras," he giggled enthusiastically, reminding me of our first visit here together. After Tatsuha gave a small nod and a smile, they both started to walk off with much conversation, "Come on Amori-chan!" Ryuichi hollered back to the girl.

The girl who was at the tiger exhibit, drinking her soda and thinking out her problems was not even there to hear Ryuichi's callings.

 She was already gone.

   END

  It is so short! MWAHAHA! The next chapter is going to be posted on April 1st, Ryuichi's birthday. Guess why everyone. So, make sure to check it out on that date.

 I have such a bad cold, so I warned you. *looks at reviews* Oh… my… God…. I have two pages worth of reviews? HOLY SHIT!!! *dances for joy* How about five people? Hah.

Also, just to clear some possible confusion. I am a male. Scary, huh? I bet everyone thought I was a girl. Thanks everyone! *cries*

 Nittle Grasper Wonder: What about this one? Pretty good? Thank you for the compliment on my ending. I actually did not want it to end like that. *laughs*

 Queen of Vegetasei: Yeah, I think I kind of hit Ryuichi right on the head to where I can get him into character enough. I do not like the too serious, or the too jaunty Ryuichi's in most fics. In addition, in some regions of the world, you can marry a cousin if you are very distant. Parents sometime suit their children up if they think they would be in good 'standards', such a health, money and what-not. On the other hand, so I have been told… I do not know. Pull an Eiri? *laughs* Tatsuha probably would. I am sorry, but the whole autobiography thing keep making me laugh. I can just see Tatsuha typing away, smoking a cigarette and getting annoyed at the cheerful Ryuichi hopping around. "Baka."

 Cherry-Wolf: *soaks n the bowing* Ego... getting too large. Heh, anyways, I am also glad they made up. And of course it is going to be Tatsuha/Ryuichi, I made them kiss again! Next time... Hanky panky!! Actually, not so sure. Oh jezz, Tatsuha gets all the fan girls? Where are MY fan girls? *laughs* Thank you for enjoying the kissing conversation, it was a conversation that actually happened in my real life. And yeah, teasing does get people no where, as it did with someone I know. You are adding this to your favorites? I feel so damn loved anymore, I thank you! Also, I love your Tatsuha fanfic, It is so good so far. In addition, Miyu just might steal the title from Ryuichi, so just keep tuned.

Ichigo: Someone is a horn dog, huh? :P  

Stacy: It brightens my mood to know that this fanfic can be used for emotional purposes. I am so honored. I am glad that you decided to choose this as the fanfic for your needs. Thank you!

Woodsie: This one was a little bit more surprising, don't you think?

Beachan18: Exciting, don't you think? And yeah, there is going to be a lot more problems because of Miyu and the engagement. Hell, I would run away if I was Tatsuha. Jump on that motorcycle and drive away!

PikuPiku: Everyone thought the chapter was adorable. *sweatdrops* You horn dog. Everyone reviewing must be horn dogs, lol. Yeah, kind of obvious it was Miyu. Ryu/Tat, as you say, is on the way.

   Thanks for the reviews, everyone! Please review this chapter and I will love you forever, and my cold will go away.

AH-CHOO!