Chapter 11: So Close Yet So Far…
"NOOO!" He yelled, struggling to move towards her. She was so close, yet so far away. She'd been thrown to the ground, her body covered with cuts and bruises. She was sprawled on the floor, her blue eyes staring into his. His friend…she was hurt, and it was all his fault. He tried to reach her, but he couldn't. She mouthed to him, her eyes filled with pain and sorrow; Run. Run, Zelgadis, run…don't come any nearer! Please, run!
"NO!" He yelled again, stretching his arms vainly, trying to reach her. It was his fault this was happening, all his fault. He truly was a monster. "AMELIA!!"
A darkness crept up behind her, taking her away from him. His friend…he was going to lose her. Why couldn't he move? She looked at his face, her expression grave and full of pain. Her face didn't hold the sweet, energetic look he was so used to. She wasn't happy anymore, wasn't full of energy, and he was to blame. It's all my fault, it's all my fault, it's all my fault…
She screamed, her voice piercing through his stone body, through his soul, through his heart. He'd almost lost her before with Phibrizzo…he didn't want to lose her again. The darkness continued to cover her, and she continued to scream in pain and fear. Their eyes locked again, and she whispered to him, "Please Zelgadis, I'll be alright. Just go…run…please…"
"No," he whispered, reaching out for her again. She still cared about others. She still had a heart of gold. And he was powerless…he couldn't do anything to help. He could only watch her disappear forever…but what's the use of living without her? He asked himself. No, he didn't care about her like that! But he couldn't leave her…she was his friend…she was Amelia…and he was the monster that brought this upon her.
The darkness continued to consume her, and the last he saw of her face would be glued into his mind forever. The painful, scared expression…he'd never see those startlingly blue eyes ever again. Her arm was outstretched, the only thing reaching for him. He reached out, they were so close…and her arm was swallowed. The only thing in front of him was darkness. Her olive skin wasn't there. Her raven-black hair wasn't there. Her blue eyes weren't there. She was gone. Gone…gone…gone. Gone…
"AMELI-AAAAAAAA!!!!!"
He shot up from his bed, only to find himself in the dark of his room, and put his head in his hands.
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Everything was spinning. All dark blurs mixed with light and sounds. She couldn't feel her arms or her legs, and she couldn't seem to breathe properly. Was she unconscious again? Her head throbbed, an immense pain seeming to flow through her every bone and vein. She fought to keep her eyes open, fought to stay awake. Pain shot through her every limb as she tried to scream, tried to call out. She tried to open her mouth, but it was clamped shut. Useless tries.
Please make it stop, Amelia thought to herself. Please… She felt like crying again; something she had been doing a lot of lately. But her pitiful sobs were dry; she had shed enough tears already. How did she end up this way? She couldn't seem to remember. Where was she? She couldn't seem to remember that, either. Useless questions.
Her mind had shattered like glass, cutting anything that it touched. She had fallen into an abyss of nothing. She felt weak, hot and sweaty. Dizziness, pain, and sadness consumed her. Everything in her mind seemed distant, as if she was forgetting, forgetting her family, her friends, her city, her people, her life, herself…everything.
Everything she tried to remember was like a dim flicker; there only for a moment to see, and too far away to see clearly.
Once again she tried to open her mouth, to say something, anything. She felt so weak and small…everything was such a blur to her.
"Reirs…Daddy…Lina…Gourry…Filia…Xellos…Shlyphiel…Zelgadis…"
The words were barely a whisper as they left her cracked lips. She couldn't see a thing; everywhere she looked she saw only darkness. For a moment, only silent echoes rang through her ears.
Something cool touched her lips. Was it her imagination again? It was cold and wet, and slid through her parted lips down her throat. It was refreshing, and a sensation of sweetness washed over her. Mmmm…so good…And then it went away. The coolness of the sweet liquid was gone, just as quickly as it had come. But it had been a moment of some sort of bliss, for it made her feel alive for that one, tiny moment.
Her head began to sway, her raven-black hair plastered to her smooth, burning olive skin. She wanted to drift back to the empty landscape that was her mind. She didn't want to swirl anymore in the waters of misery and pain. She wanted to walk along a mindless trail, and lose herself in an empty dream. Reality brought too much pain, too much suffering, too much longing…
NO, a part of her mind yelled back. Reality is full of love, justice, and happiness. People who care about me, people I care about. I have to find them. Don't I?? She didn't know what to think anymore. She didn't know what was right, and what was wrong. What she believed, and what she didn't. Her mind was a jumbled mess, a broken puzzle that she would have to put together again. I don't belong here, do I? I belong home, in Saillune…don't I? But then, if I go back, everyone I care about won't be safe. They'll be in danger…all because of me…so I should just stay here, alone, right?? Her mind fought with herself, a conflict that confused and tired her.
She opened her mouth again to say something, and a small mumble escaped her lips. Her life seemed to blur before her now dull blue unseeing eyes, and she felt herself fall. And everything suddenly rendered all black…and the words she had mumbled echoed through her mind…
"…I hate you…"
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Zelgadis was up and roaming the quiet streets before the sun could kiss the rooftops of the small town. He had still not been able to find her, and had started searching the town after waking up from his nightmare during the night. He hadn't been able to go to sleep, and he wanted to find her…fast. What if something had happened to her? But he started giving up hope…what if he couldn't find her? He'd been searching for days, and he hadn't found her…and it was such a small town, too…
Everything I look for I can never find, he thought to himself as he checked the same small alleys he had checked before. He dragged his feet through the stone cobbled streets, his eyes always searching for any sign of her…anything…
He checked the houses, the alleys, the streets, everywhere. He asked everyone he saw, even people he had asked before. He'd even asked the waitress from the tavern at least five times if she had heard anything else, but she always shook her head and sadly said no. Everyone in the town began to pity the strange stone man; men, woman and children watched him with sad eyes as he passed them.
He walked through the streets for the rest of the day, and found himself at the end of the small town as the sun was setting. A path led out of the town, and up a green hill. He didn't know why he hadn't searched there before. A house lay at the top, with no lights on, and an eerie silence seeming to come from the big house. It was the one place he hadn't yet checked, and it might be the house she was in…His hopes began to grow, and he began to walk towards the big house that lay at the top of the hill. Amelia might just be there…I might just find her!…But…what if she isn't there? Don't think like that, Zelgadis. She has to be there…it's the one place in the entire town that I haven't checked. Then again, it isn't exactly in the town, but that doesn't matter. I might just find her…if you're there, Amelia, wait for me…please…
Zelgadis began walking a bit faster, when something caught his attention. He heard a sound come from his right, and he turned swiftly around, his arm already drawing out his sword.
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Filia couldn't believe that night had already fallen, but she continued on anyways. She was in her golden dragon form, high up in the night sky as she headed for Saillune. She flew with urgent speed; something about Xellos' words had worried her.
Stupid namagomi…why am I even listening to him? If this is all just a joke, my mace is going to smash in his ugly face. But he never really lies…oh, stupid mazoku! And my Val-kun… Xellos and Val were the two things that had occupied her mind the most ever since she had started out, and she was beginning to worry about Val. Poor Val, I hope he's alright…That stupid mazoku better not touch him!
Even though Val wasn't her real child, she loved him as if he was. And if that namagomi comes so much as 10 ft close to my Val, I'll…
Her mind switched to think about Amelia, and Filia hoped she was all right. Maybe they've found her already. And then her thoughts switched to Lina and Gourry. I wonder why they've gone to Saillune…and why I have to go there as well…what does that namagomi know? Way more then the rest of us, I suppose. Damn that namagomi!!
The ryuzoku continued to fly through the night sky, feeling herself tire increasingly fast, and she knew that she would have to stop to rest soon. She was so close to Saillune, and yet she felt that she wouldn't be able to get there as soon as she wished to.
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*AN: Hello again! It's been a while, no? Sorry it's taken so long, but school's been getting in the way. So, what did you think of this chapter? I find it a bit dark, don't you? In fact, I'm starting to think that a lot of this fic has been dark! But, being the hopeless romantic that I am, there's a good chance that this fic will have a happy ending…but then again, you never know what my fingers will type next. And I'm sorry if this chapter is short! Bad me! The next chapter will be longer…I hope *grins*
I can't wait until the next chapter, because…well, I can't tell you! :p Tell me if you think this fic is dark, cause I want to know if you think that too. And there was no Lina, Gourry, OR Xellos in this chapter! *gasps* But I did that for a reason, I assure you. Well, maybe not with Xellos…he didn't show up because I couldn't figure out a way to fit him in here! I wonder if he'll show up next chapter…
And Zel STILL hasn't found Amelia! But I don't want him to find her just yet *cackles* You'll just have to wait. Anyways, I hope you liked this chapter. Don't forget to review!!!
And thnx to Zanne Chaos for reviewing! I'm glad that you and a lot of others liked Filia and Xellos' conversation! And thank you so much for saying that I have storytelling skills. ^_^ I think I'll thank everyone at least once if they review! *grins* And to KellyChan…good question ^_^ Can stone skin really sweat? I think it does…doesn't it? Thanks to anyone else who reviewed, I appreciate the fact that you take the time to write me a review! It means a lot, every single one!! SO if I didn't mention you for reviewing, don't take it the wrong way…every review I get is noted *grins* So thank you, every single one of you!!!
And, as always, I'd like to thank all of you for reviewing!! *grins* I think I should build a temple to go along with those monuments I'm going to make of you, no? ^_^ Well, till next time! –Vivi Laney