Dilution: 7/?
Rating: R (for drugs and language)
Disclaimer: Not mine. But oh, how I wish they could be.....
Note: A/U .... Bosco is a druggie, yada yada yada, you've heard it enough. Gracias to Fyre for letting me use Mercedes, and to Faith for inspiring me. Thanks for the feedback, sorry it's been so long yet again.
It was hard enough to look at Mercedes the next day during shift, let alone answer her questions about Bosco. I told her that I'd picked him up and brought him back to my place for the night, casually leaving the part about me ending up sleeping with him out. I think I now understand why people use the term 'earth shattering'. I'm sure that glass would have broken if our cries had been any louder. Thinking about it makes my whole body tingle, makes my mind escape me.
"Earth. To. Faith." Her voice is low, harsh, short and cutoff. Mostly, annoyed.
"Huh?" I spin my head to her, my thoughts ending.
"Lights green." She points to the light, looking at me like I must be crazy.
It's then that I notice the light in fact, has changed from it's red stage, is now green, and the cars behind me are beginning to honk. I press my foot to the gas petal, and the car lurches forward.
"You okay, Faith?" She asks me, her question genuine.
I only nod, afraid of what will slip past my lips if I do answer. She's looking at me though, her eyes not wavering, so I do speak. "Fine. I'm fine."
Her eyes don't move though, "Everything go okay with Reese last night?" She asks.
"Yup."
She's still looking at me, and what can I say, I crumble under her eyes. "I didn't mean too, it just happened. You know? One minute we're both just sitting there, and then we're kissing, and you know how one thing leads to another, and I'm really, but..." I realize that I've been rambling far too much and far to fast, yet she understood. Her face falls, her jaw opens a little, and she turns from me.
"Go back to the station." Are the only words that she utters, and I turn the car around without question as she continues, "I think I'm going to be sick."
--------------------------
"Come on, will you talk to me already?" I beg, leaning up against the lockers in the precinct. When we came back, I told Lieu that we'd had some bad burritos for lunch, and we were both throwing up. He told us to go home. Which for me, meant back to Bosco in my apartment.
I'd left in there, just got up for work and left him sleeping on the bed. And now I was begging Mercedes to finally talk to me again.
"I...I'm...It just happened, Mercedes. It was a mistake, and I feel bad."
"Like hell." Is her response as I hear the bathroom stall door flipping over and the toilet flush. She washes her hands and turns towards her locker, the one I'm next to, turning the dial to open it.
"I really am. I know what you're thinking. You must hate me, but Mercedes"
"There is no 'but', Faith. You may be older than me, his age, but that doesn't mean that it's okay. Maybe if he were clean and –normal- , I wouldn't have a problem with it. But right now, I do. So leave me the hell alone."
And that's the last thing she says before she leaves, leaving her locker unopened and locked.
-------------------------
The thing was, it scared me. To push down. I wasn't patient, and when I pressed down with the pocket knife, and the blood didn't come up right away, I was scared. Because this time it was different – I was waiting for it to come, to make the pain go away, but instead it brought pain. A sharp, searing pain that hissed throughout my skin. And then something different happened, something that hadn't happened before – I wanted it to stop. As soon as I saw the blood begin to trickle up in some places, small dots of my dark blood bubbling to the surface, I put my hand over it. I tried to stop it. I didn't want this anymore – I wanted something different. That scared me.
I called out to him when I got home, just to see if he was still. When I got no response, I looked around the kitchen for a note, anything to tell me that he was okay. Nothing. What was I expecting, him to care? To remember? He was a junkie, Mercedes junkie brother, off limits in all ways.
Pulling the hair tie out of her hair, she walked down the hall and into the bedroom, jumping back at what she saw.
Bosco was on the ground, blood on his wrists, his eyes staring at his arm. He looked lost, scared, all alone like a little kid. He looked so small then, so thin and weak.
"Bosco.." Faith whispered, slowly kneeling down next to him, grabbing Kleenex off of the bedside table and taking a wrist in her hand. He looked up at her, eyes full of fear.
"I don't wanna die, Faith, I don't wanna die." He told her, sobs escaping from his throat, hands clenching the sides of her shirt tightly as she pulled him to her.
Tears formed in her eyes as she kissed the top of his head, his lips uttering the same thing over and over.
"I'm not gonna let you, you'll be okay." she told him, hoping that he really would be.
Rating: R (for drugs and language)
Disclaimer: Not mine. But oh, how I wish they could be.....
Note: A/U .... Bosco is a druggie, yada yada yada, you've heard it enough. Gracias to Fyre for letting me use Mercedes, and to Faith for inspiring me. Thanks for the feedback, sorry it's been so long yet again.
It was hard enough to look at Mercedes the next day during shift, let alone answer her questions about Bosco. I told her that I'd picked him up and brought him back to my place for the night, casually leaving the part about me ending up sleeping with him out. I think I now understand why people use the term 'earth shattering'. I'm sure that glass would have broken if our cries had been any louder. Thinking about it makes my whole body tingle, makes my mind escape me.
"Earth. To. Faith." Her voice is low, harsh, short and cutoff. Mostly, annoyed.
"Huh?" I spin my head to her, my thoughts ending.
"Lights green." She points to the light, looking at me like I must be crazy.
It's then that I notice the light in fact, has changed from it's red stage, is now green, and the cars behind me are beginning to honk. I press my foot to the gas petal, and the car lurches forward.
"You okay, Faith?" She asks me, her question genuine.
I only nod, afraid of what will slip past my lips if I do answer. She's looking at me though, her eyes not wavering, so I do speak. "Fine. I'm fine."
Her eyes don't move though, "Everything go okay with Reese last night?" She asks.
"Yup."
She's still looking at me, and what can I say, I crumble under her eyes. "I didn't mean too, it just happened. You know? One minute we're both just sitting there, and then we're kissing, and you know how one thing leads to another, and I'm really, but..." I realize that I've been rambling far too much and far to fast, yet she understood. Her face falls, her jaw opens a little, and she turns from me.
"Go back to the station." Are the only words that she utters, and I turn the car around without question as she continues, "I think I'm going to be sick."
--------------------------
"Come on, will you talk to me already?" I beg, leaning up against the lockers in the precinct. When we came back, I told Lieu that we'd had some bad burritos for lunch, and we were both throwing up. He told us to go home. Which for me, meant back to Bosco in my apartment.
I'd left in there, just got up for work and left him sleeping on the bed. And now I was begging Mercedes to finally talk to me again.
"I...I'm...It just happened, Mercedes. It was a mistake, and I feel bad."
"Like hell." Is her response as I hear the bathroom stall door flipping over and the toilet flush. She washes her hands and turns towards her locker, the one I'm next to, turning the dial to open it.
"I really am. I know what you're thinking. You must hate me, but Mercedes"
"There is no 'but', Faith. You may be older than me, his age, but that doesn't mean that it's okay. Maybe if he were clean and –normal- , I wouldn't have a problem with it. But right now, I do. So leave me the hell alone."
And that's the last thing she says before she leaves, leaving her locker unopened and locked.
-------------------------
The thing was, it scared me. To push down. I wasn't patient, and when I pressed down with the pocket knife, and the blood didn't come up right away, I was scared. Because this time it was different – I was waiting for it to come, to make the pain go away, but instead it brought pain. A sharp, searing pain that hissed throughout my skin. And then something different happened, something that hadn't happened before – I wanted it to stop. As soon as I saw the blood begin to trickle up in some places, small dots of my dark blood bubbling to the surface, I put my hand over it. I tried to stop it. I didn't want this anymore – I wanted something different. That scared me.
I called out to him when I got home, just to see if he was still. When I got no response, I looked around the kitchen for a note, anything to tell me that he was okay. Nothing. What was I expecting, him to care? To remember? He was a junkie, Mercedes junkie brother, off limits in all ways.
Pulling the hair tie out of her hair, she walked down the hall and into the bedroom, jumping back at what she saw.
Bosco was on the ground, blood on his wrists, his eyes staring at his arm. He looked lost, scared, all alone like a little kid. He looked so small then, so thin and weak.
"Bosco.." Faith whispered, slowly kneeling down next to him, grabbing Kleenex off of the bedside table and taking a wrist in her hand. He looked up at her, eyes full of fear.
"I don't wanna die, Faith, I don't wanna die." He told her, sobs escaping from his throat, hands clenching the sides of her shirt tightly as she pulled him to her.
Tears formed in her eyes as she kissed the top of his head, his lips uttering the same thing over and over.
"I'm not gonna let you, you'll be okay." she told him, hoping that he really would be.