Title: A Fair Exchange.
Author: Charlie
Timeline: Post BtVS S7 & AtS S5. Sequel to "Best Laid Plans."
Summary:Xander begins revamping the slayer school but finds his biggest challeges lie within.
Feedback is always appreciated.
Author Notes: Round and round, the ship goes. Where it lands, the
Author doesn't know. Will it be (A)my, (B)uffy, (C)ordelia, (D)awn, (F)aith, (F)red, (H)armony, (K)ennedy or (W)illow that wins the Xandman?
-Cleveland-
Alexander sighed out of boredom. It was another lazy day in what was shaping up to being a lazy week at the store. Aside from Tuesday, when most of the new albums came out, business had been slow. The week's biggest seller thus far was a dance compilation album and that was NEVER a good sign. 'Especially on a hellmouth'.
Such was his boredom that he was going over the order forms for the past two shipments and reorder stocks. He was deeply engrossed in this task and didn't pay attention to the customers trusting Keith and James to watch over the store. He meticulously ticked off each item as he accounted for it.
"THERE YOU ARE HARRIS!"
Alex looked up in annoyance and located the source of that booming voice. Travis stood just inside the door, seething with anger. Behind him, Alex caught a flash of red hair, Willow. Resigning himself to the inevitable, he put down the paperwork and stood up. He leaned over and said something to the other two men and then headed out the side door into the alley. He was waiting there when Travis and Willow followed a few seconds later.
The half demon stepped forward slowly; his appearance flickered between human and his demonic side. Rage was evident on his face as he curled his hands into fists. "You bastard, how dare you attack her."
Willow managed to get between the two men and tried to restrain Travis. She turned her head to try say something and was surprised at what she saw. Alexander looked bored and uninterested in at what was going on.
"Let him go Will."
Surprised she did so and he brushed past and stalked up to the younger man. From his superior height, Travis glared down at the other man, "I hope you have a very good reason for me NOT to beat you to pulp. BOY."
Alex just looked up at him calmly; "Go ahead, better men then you have tried."
The half demon was about to say something when Willow interrupted him, "Travis no violence, please it will only make things worse."
The older man opened his mouth to say something then thought better of it and stepped back while still glaring at Alex. Willow exhaled softly before turning her attention to her oldest friend, "Okay Xander, I'm not normally one to say this but, What the HELL were you thinking? You hurt Buffy, you let her get attacked and injured." She finished.
Alex wasn't impressed, "It never fails Will. Given a choice, nine times out of ten you side with her."
"And what's that supposed to mean, you hurt her Xander. You attacked one of your best friends."
"She wasn't my friend. And neither are you. See friends talk to each other, they're there for each other. They care about each other."
"Buffy and I care about you."
"Bullshit. You didn't bother looking for me for TWO FUCKING years Willow. If I was such a 'good friend' WHY DIDN'T YOU LOOK?"
Willow flinched at his tone.
"I'll tell you why, because I wasn't important to either one of you. You didn't give a damn about me. I wasn't Buffy's 'Xander-shaped' friend; I was her 'Xander-shaped' doormat. Something she could wipe the filth and dirt from her day off on and never have to worry about. And YOU, the second she paid any attention to me, you relegated me to back burner status."
"That's not true, I cared about you. You were always my best friend."
"Sure I was Willow. That's why you kept siding with her when it came to EVERYTHING."
"I did not."
"Oh no? How about with Angelus?"
"That wasn't her fault. She didn't know about the curse, nobody did."
"No but, how many people died because she didn't stake him?"
"If she had staked him who would have saved you from Faith?"
"Did it ever occur to Wills that maybe without Angel around to distract us, that we could have stopped Faith before she went off the deep end?"
Travis raised an eyebrow as he listened to the two people speak. He was trying to identify the emotion in the younger man's voice. 'Guilt maybe?'
"She turned her back on me Willow, not just once but TWICE for a vampire. She preferred to feel the touch of a corpse then the helping hand of a friend."
Willow got angry, "Is that what this is? Jealous because she didn't pick YOU? That she would rather be with Parker, Riley, Angel or Spike rather then you?"
Her accusation hung in the air as he took a deep breath before answering, "I was jealous of Angel. I admit that. I was jealous that she would rather be with him then me. But I got over that I even respected Angel a little for leaving town when he saw how much he hurt her. Then came Parker and Spike and I realized that Buffy just loves jerks. The more a guy can hurt her the more she likes it."
The red head didn't say anything as he continued ranting, "I mean I helped her out when NO ONE else would. When Angelus turned Theresa as a way of sending his love, it was ME that was there for her. When she was feeling down because some vamp bitch in college kicked her ass, I was the one that cheered her up with tales of working at the 'Fabulous Ladies Night' club. When she needed a pep talk after Riley left, it was ME who did it. And when she was trying to put her life back together after everything with Spike, it was me, Xander, the 'useless one', the guy with no future, that was there for her and Dawn."
He paused for a second, "And you know what I got in return? Nothing. When I was right about Angel, did she say anything? No. When everyone found out about us, she didn't say a word to me. When my wedding fell apart, she didn't even TRY to talk to me afterwards nor did anyone else." Willow suddenly couldn't meet his gaze.
"And when I was stuck bleeding like a pig over the entrance to the Hellmouth, did she stop to check on me? Did she ask how I was doing? No. She ran to Spike, to check on him. The super strong vampire with a soul, the same vampire that had tried to rape and kill her before. The same vamp that fed off of Wood. The one man she felt was watching her back when NO one else was. She didn't give a damn about anyone else or me. All she could think of was herself and what happened to her."
"That's not true." Willow managed to get out, "When you disappeared, she was surprised and when you didn't come back after a few weeks, she started getting frantic and twitchy. She couldn't sleep and finally Giles had to send her overseas to try and calm her down. But she was really worried about you."
Alex remained unconvinced, "Yeah right. She was worried all right. She was worried that her favorite doormat wouldn't be back. That she would have to try and live like a real person." He gestured in Travis's direction, "Looks like she needn't have worried. Once she got her new toy, she was fine."
The half demon frowned at his words, as he had listened to the conversation his anger had cooled considerably. Now he idly wondered what was going on between this young man and his lover.
"But Buffy's not the only one who treated me like crap."
"That's not true, Xander. I've always been your friend."
"You sure as hell didn't act like it. We used to get together at your house to watch Monstervision. As soon as Buffy showed up though, it was bronzing with her."
"You didn't seem to mind."
"It was either go to the Bronze you guys or sit at home and listen to my parents, Will. What did you think I had a choice in the matter."
"Buffy was new in town, she was the Slayer-."
"And I was your best friend."
Willow lowered her gaze to the ground, unable to meet his gaze. "When your parents were out of town, you used to stay at my house and sleep in my room. We'd talk about Star Wars, Star Trek, Battlestar Galactica, we even talked about Buck Rogers and Flash Gordon. We'd make s'mores in the microwave and eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches before falling asleep in front the TV at your house. And then other people came along and you decided they were more important then me and pushed me away."
"Xander, we weren't going to be kids forever."
"No but I thought we were going to be friends."
"We were friends."
"No we weren't. You picked Buffy over me. You picked Oz over me."
That got her attention, "I loved Oz."
"And you didn't love me?"
"Yes, I mean No, I mean. You had Cordelia and you would rather have been with her THEN ME." Her voice was breaking.
He opened his mouth to say something but caught himself and remained silent as a hurt look momentarily flashed across his face. His actions went unnoticed by Willow but not by the half demon that was watching with increasing curiosity.
She found her voice and spoke first, "Besides you seemed all love-y dove-y with Anya that you didn't seem to care."
"I didn't care?" Anger crept back into Alex's voice, "When Oz skipped town and left you in tears, who was it that let you sob on their shoulders and held your hand every time you looked like you were about to cry? Then Tara showed up and you started becoming all super witch."
"Don't you DARE talk about Tara Xander!"
"I loved Tara, Willow. I loved her like a sister. But that didn't stop me from concerned about you. I mean you cursed me, Giles. Christ Willow, did it ever occur to you to stop and think about what you were doing?"
The witch didn't answer him. She stared down at her feet trying to find some meaning the dirt and cracked asphalt below. The wind gently brushed a few strands of her hair across her face. She brushed them back not hearing the deep breath Alex took, not hearing him at all until he began speaking.
"I spent what would have been my honeymoon night drinking myself into a stupor in a motel room, Willow. I did the same thing when we first left Sunnydale and stopped in Oxnard. Each time I hoped somehow, somebody would come and see me. But no one ever did, least of all you and Buffy. When I needed my friends the most, I found out I didn't have any." He spoke that last part in a sad voice.
There was a long pause before Travis moved. He quietly walked past Alexander and touched Willow on the arm, startling her. She looked up at him with a confused look on her face. "I think it's time for us to go Willow." Numbly she nodded and started walking towards their car.
Travis watched her go for a little before turning and looking at Alexander. He had also been watching his former best friend leave when he saw the half demon looking at him intently. The two men stared at each other for a long time before Travis spoke.
"My condolences on your losses."
Alex blinked in surprise and then nodded. Silently each man left the alley with a lot to think about.
Author: Charlie
Timeline: Post BtVS S7 & AtS S5. Sequel to "Best Laid Plans."
Summary:Xander begins revamping the slayer school but finds his biggest challeges lie within.
Feedback is always appreciated.
Author Notes: Round and round, the ship goes. Where it lands, the
Author doesn't know. Will it be (A)my, (B)uffy, (C)ordelia, (D)awn, (F)aith, (F)red, (H)armony, (K)ennedy or (W)illow that wins the Xandman?
-Cleveland-
Alexander sighed out of boredom. It was another lazy day in what was shaping up to being a lazy week at the store. Aside from Tuesday, when most of the new albums came out, business had been slow. The week's biggest seller thus far was a dance compilation album and that was NEVER a good sign. 'Especially on a hellmouth'.
Such was his boredom that he was going over the order forms for the past two shipments and reorder stocks. He was deeply engrossed in this task and didn't pay attention to the customers trusting Keith and James to watch over the store. He meticulously ticked off each item as he accounted for it.
"THERE YOU ARE HARRIS!"
Alex looked up in annoyance and located the source of that booming voice. Travis stood just inside the door, seething with anger. Behind him, Alex caught a flash of red hair, Willow. Resigning himself to the inevitable, he put down the paperwork and stood up. He leaned over and said something to the other two men and then headed out the side door into the alley. He was waiting there when Travis and Willow followed a few seconds later.
The half demon stepped forward slowly; his appearance flickered between human and his demonic side. Rage was evident on his face as he curled his hands into fists. "You bastard, how dare you attack her."
Willow managed to get between the two men and tried to restrain Travis. She turned her head to try say something and was surprised at what she saw. Alexander looked bored and uninterested in at what was going on.
"Let him go Will."
Surprised she did so and he brushed past and stalked up to the younger man. From his superior height, Travis glared down at the other man, "I hope you have a very good reason for me NOT to beat you to pulp. BOY."
Alex just looked up at him calmly; "Go ahead, better men then you have tried."
The half demon was about to say something when Willow interrupted him, "Travis no violence, please it will only make things worse."
The older man opened his mouth to say something then thought better of it and stepped back while still glaring at Alex. Willow exhaled softly before turning her attention to her oldest friend, "Okay Xander, I'm not normally one to say this but, What the HELL were you thinking? You hurt Buffy, you let her get attacked and injured." She finished.
Alex wasn't impressed, "It never fails Will. Given a choice, nine times out of ten you side with her."
"And what's that supposed to mean, you hurt her Xander. You attacked one of your best friends."
"She wasn't my friend. And neither are you. See friends talk to each other, they're there for each other. They care about each other."
"Buffy and I care about you."
"Bullshit. You didn't bother looking for me for TWO FUCKING years Willow. If I was such a 'good friend' WHY DIDN'T YOU LOOK?"
Willow flinched at his tone.
"I'll tell you why, because I wasn't important to either one of you. You didn't give a damn about me. I wasn't Buffy's 'Xander-shaped' friend; I was her 'Xander-shaped' doormat. Something she could wipe the filth and dirt from her day off on and never have to worry about. And YOU, the second she paid any attention to me, you relegated me to back burner status."
"That's not true, I cared about you. You were always my best friend."
"Sure I was Willow. That's why you kept siding with her when it came to EVERYTHING."
"I did not."
"Oh no? How about with Angelus?"
"That wasn't her fault. She didn't know about the curse, nobody did."
"No but, how many people died because she didn't stake him?"
"If she had staked him who would have saved you from Faith?"
"Did it ever occur to Wills that maybe without Angel around to distract us, that we could have stopped Faith before she went off the deep end?"
Travis raised an eyebrow as he listened to the two people speak. He was trying to identify the emotion in the younger man's voice. 'Guilt maybe?'
"She turned her back on me Willow, not just once but TWICE for a vampire. She preferred to feel the touch of a corpse then the helping hand of a friend."
Willow got angry, "Is that what this is? Jealous because she didn't pick YOU? That she would rather be with Parker, Riley, Angel or Spike rather then you?"
Her accusation hung in the air as he took a deep breath before answering, "I was jealous of Angel. I admit that. I was jealous that she would rather be with him then me. But I got over that I even respected Angel a little for leaving town when he saw how much he hurt her. Then came Parker and Spike and I realized that Buffy just loves jerks. The more a guy can hurt her the more she likes it."
The red head didn't say anything as he continued ranting, "I mean I helped her out when NO ONE else would. When Angelus turned Theresa as a way of sending his love, it was ME that was there for her. When she was feeling down because some vamp bitch in college kicked her ass, I was the one that cheered her up with tales of working at the 'Fabulous Ladies Night' club. When she needed a pep talk after Riley left, it was ME who did it. And when she was trying to put her life back together after everything with Spike, it was me, Xander, the 'useless one', the guy with no future, that was there for her and Dawn."
He paused for a second, "And you know what I got in return? Nothing. When I was right about Angel, did she say anything? No. When everyone found out about us, she didn't say a word to me. When my wedding fell apart, she didn't even TRY to talk to me afterwards nor did anyone else." Willow suddenly couldn't meet his gaze.
"And when I was stuck bleeding like a pig over the entrance to the Hellmouth, did she stop to check on me? Did she ask how I was doing? No. She ran to Spike, to check on him. The super strong vampire with a soul, the same vampire that had tried to rape and kill her before. The same vamp that fed off of Wood. The one man she felt was watching her back when NO one else was. She didn't give a damn about anyone else or me. All she could think of was herself and what happened to her."
"That's not true." Willow managed to get out, "When you disappeared, she was surprised and when you didn't come back after a few weeks, she started getting frantic and twitchy. She couldn't sleep and finally Giles had to send her overseas to try and calm her down. But she was really worried about you."
Alex remained unconvinced, "Yeah right. She was worried all right. She was worried that her favorite doormat wouldn't be back. That she would have to try and live like a real person." He gestured in Travis's direction, "Looks like she needn't have worried. Once she got her new toy, she was fine."
The half demon frowned at his words, as he had listened to the conversation his anger had cooled considerably. Now he idly wondered what was going on between this young man and his lover.
"But Buffy's not the only one who treated me like crap."
"That's not true, Xander. I've always been your friend."
"You sure as hell didn't act like it. We used to get together at your house to watch Monstervision. As soon as Buffy showed up though, it was bronzing with her."
"You didn't seem to mind."
"It was either go to the Bronze you guys or sit at home and listen to my parents, Will. What did you think I had a choice in the matter."
"Buffy was new in town, she was the Slayer-."
"And I was your best friend."
Willow lowered her gaze to the ground, unable to meet his gaze. "When your parents were out of town, you used to stay at my house and sleep in my room. We'd talk about Star Wars, Star Trek, Battlestar Galactica, we even talked about Buck Rogers and Flash Gordon. We'd make s'mores in the microwave and eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches before falling asleep in front the TV at your house. And then other people came along and you decided they were more important then me and pushed me away."
"Xander, we weren't going to be kids forever."
"No but I thought we were going to be friends."
"We were friends."
"No we weren't. You picked Buffy over me. You picked Oz over me."
That got her attention, "I loved Oz."
"And you didn't love me?"
"Yes, I mean No, I mean. You had Cordelia and you would rather have been with her THEN ME." Her voice was breaking.
He opened his mouth to say something but caught himself and remained silent as a hurt look momentarily flashed across his face. His actions went unnoticed by Willow but not by the half demon that was watching with increasing curiosity.
She found her voice and spoke first, "Besides you seemed all love-y dove-y with Anya that you didn't seem to care."
"I didn't care?" Anger crept back into Alex's voice, "When Oz skipped town and left you in tears, who was it that let you sob on their shoulders and held your hand every time you looked like you were about to cry? Then Tara showed up and you started becoming all super witch."
"Don't you DARE talk about Tara Xander!"
"I loved Tara, Willow. I loved her like a sister. But that didn't stop me from concerned about you. I mean you cursed me, Giles. Christ Willow, did it ever occur to you to stop and think about what you were doing?"
The witch didn't answer him. She stared down at her feet trying to find some meaning the dirt and cracked asphalt below. The wind gently brushed a few strands of her hair across her face. She brushed them back not hearing the deep breath Alex took, not hearing him at all until he began speaking.
"I spent what would have been my honeymoon night drinking myself into a stupor in a motel room, Willow. I did the same thing when we first left Sunnydale and stopped in Oxnard. Each time I hoped somehow, somebody would come and see me. But no one ever did, least of all you and Buffy. When I needed my friends the most, I found out I didn't have any." He spoke that last part in a sad voice.
There was a long pause before Travis moved. He quietly walked past Alexander and touched Willow on the arm, startling her. She looked up at him with a confused look on her face. "I think it's time for us to go Willow." Numbly she nodded and started walking towards their car.
Travis watched her go for a little before turning and looking at Alexander. He had also been watching his former best friend leave when he saw the half demon looking at him intently. The two men stared at each other for a long time before Travis spoke.
"My condolences on your losses."
Alex blinked in surprise and then nodded. Silently each man left the alley with a lot to think about.