A/N: What trouble could I get Haldir and Indilisse into next? Hmmm, author wracks her diabolical brain for interesting ways to piss off her readers because the lovers will not admit their love... and keep arguing with each other. The author cannot think of any at this time, so please be gratified with this filler chapter, and some lovely bonding time between our starring elves.
I do not own anything that is in any way connected to Tolkien Enterprises and his estate. I own my OCs though... and color in the outlines of the lives of the elves Tolkien so wonderfully left open. Also, the stories dealing with a lion is from Aesop.
WARNING: Mention of pedophilia, as a joke, nothing more. It is in one short sentence. Get over it.
Chapter 20- Secret Places and Memories
Indilisse stood in front of her mirror, looking over her suede-cloth riding tunic and leggings. She wished that she could appear a little more feminine on their ride, wearing one of her gowns, but a mass of fabric was definitely not conducive to riding a horse properly. Riding a horse properly with a male elf directly behind her. Her heart fluttered and she swallowed hard, the butterflies moving down to her stomach as she thought of the situation that would soon be presented her when she met Haldir down at the stables. Really she did not know why she so easily excepted the invitation to go riding with him when it was nearly petrifying to her to think of all that could go on when they were to be alone.
With a heavy, but happy, sigh, Indilisse left her talan and started down the long staircases to the stables. She found Haldir leading Mornhîr out of the stables, a saddle upon the horse's wide back and a satchel attached to it that looked like if carried enough food to feed ten elves. He looked in her direction, obviously hearing her making her way towards him. Haldir smiled brightly, and turned back to the horse, giving the animal a friendly pat on his neck.
"You took more than a few moments." Haldir chided.
Indilisse scoffed, "I would like to see you disentangle yourself from yards of fabric with different ties all about your body."
"You are right, that would be difficult." Haldir nodded his head, but smiled cheekily, "But I have no problem removing them from bodies that are not my own."
She stood still, and gave him a disdainful grunt, "Oh I see. You think to win me over with your cunning use of suggestions, Haldir?"
He shrugged his shoulders and motioned with his hand for her mount the horse. Indilisse did as he wanted and placed a boot-covered foot into the stirrup of the light saddle. Upon hoisting herself up, however, she felt his strong hands upon her waist, settling her into the seat before removing his hands. Usually she would have yelled at him for thinking her incapable of mounting a horse by herself, but on this day, all she cared about was that his hands were on her waist and how wonderful they felt there, and also how gallant he was to help her up.
Indilisse grumbled to herself, I have to stop thinking like this.
In moments, Haldir had thrown his leg over the side of the horse and his warm body was slowly adjusting to the position behind her. He shifted in the saddle slightly, positioning himself so that he could comfortably sit with her in front of him. To grab the reigns, he reached around her, encircling her with his strong arms and nudged the animal beneath them into a slow walk. The sudden jarring of the movement caused her to slide back further on the smooth saddle, her backend resting inconveniently between his thighs.
She had to think of something else. Anything else. Anything other than the feeling of his body pressed to hers and sensations of having his warm breath upon her neck.
"Why are we riding with a saddle?" She asked. "Most Elvish horses do not like saddles."
"I know." Haldir replied, "But it is easier to control the horse if two people ride together in a saddle."
"Oh." Indilisse said absently, finding the feeling of the deeply-registered voice rumbling in his chest completely comforting and something she would never grow tired of feeling.
He sighed, "You act as though you have never ridden with another before?"
"Nay." She said, "Well, Ada when I was very small and could not travel alone. But those days have long since passed."
She could tell he as disappointed with that by the next tone of his voice, "You do not remember when I took you? You were only ten years old then."
Indilisse paused and thought for awhile, and then let a small smile cross her face, "I cannot believe I forgot. I begged of you to take me out with you for the longest time to the borders because Ada would never do it."
"I did not take you out either." Haldir reminded, his mood slightly happier.
"Aye, but I thought you had. When you are as small as that, even the shortest distance and the most miniscule of objects is grander than you could have ever imagined." She replied, seeing the curious glances from many elves as they made their way out of the city gates. Where was Nindë when you needed her? It would have been sweet justice to have her witness this event.
He rested his arms upon her thighs, letting the horse move on its own accord. "That is true, I must admit. I cannot imagine what something like the White Tower or the Falls of Imladris would be to someone so young."
Indilisse shrugged, "They were magnificent, but never would they compare to Lórien. This has and will always be home, no matter where I move to. And honestly, the small things amaze me more than the large things. Like watching butterflies swirl about in the air, or the marvelously private grottos you can find out of the city."
Haldir chuckled, "How do you know of these grottos, fair Indilisse? Most only know and visit them if they are trysting."
"And you do not remember that you took me to one on that very same time you took me riding?" She asked, turned her head slightly to glance at him. "Are you unwholesome to young elleths, Haldir?"
"I like to think not with the very young." He said quietly, "But you constantly point out what a depraved life I have led with the likes of Nindë. So I guess it is in the eye of the beholder."
Indilisse was quiet for a few moments, and sighed, "I do not mean what I say most of the time, Haldir. You know that has been a hex of mine since childhood."
"Aye, I know." Haldir said, leaning into her more. "Though most of what you say is true. You have an ability for stark observations."
"To put it politely." Indilisse finished for him with a slight laugh.
"And I find it refreshing. None of those pathetic elleths who only say what they think you want to hear." Haldir said. "And... honestly... as much as it chagrins me to admit this, it is helpful in putting me in my place."
Indilisse giggled, "I cannot believe that I could put you into your place, venerable March Warden of Lórien."
He laughed against her ear, but stopped and sighed slightly, "You really have no idea the affect you have on me, do you?"
"Well, considering for the longest time you could only find my faults, I thought all I inspired was resentment." She said.
"I did that so I could try to make myself believe that I did not care for you, Indilisse." Haldir admitted. Indilisse found all of this quite odd, as Haldir had never been so open with her before, and likely had never been so open with anyone like this in the past. He whispered against her ear, sending a shiver down her spine, "But I do care for you, Indilisse. More than you could possibly know."
Indilisse was silent and swallowed hard around the lump formed painfully in her throat. She wanted to tell him she loved him, but it was too soon. He would not want to hear it now. After all, he only 'cared' for her, and had not said he 'loved' her. And she was not sure if she wanted to get close to another male again, the thought that she might make the same mistake as she did in the past forever looming over her.
"Have I actually stolen the words right from your mouth?" He asked delightedly.
"Hardly." She managed to squeak out. "I was only thinking."
Haldir chuckled and directed the horse through a thick grouping of trees and they came out onto a small glade. One the far end was a clear pond, a slight waterfall cascading down the side of the wall of gray rock. Moss grew on the stone around the dark glade, and plants grew freely from the cracks in the rocks among the tiny cave carved out of the stone. It was the exact glade he had brought her to so many years ago.
"You remember where every grotto is?" She asked.
"I make it my business to know of every single part of this great forest." Haldir replied, stopping the horse and swinging down from the mount. He offered his hand to her, she took it gladly, and it seemed much to his happiness and extreme delight. He removed the satchel of food from the horse and slung it over his shoulder, taking her hand in his other.
Indilisse followed him to the place where a large tree trunk met the side of the rocky cavern, and watched him sit down, carefully positioning himself before looking up at her expectantly. She smiled and sat next to him, close enough that their shoulders were touching but far enough away that she was not on top of him. He set out the feast he had brought, and soon they were both enjoying the meal and recalling old stories and some new ones.
"Luinil is an odd elf." Indilisse had mentioned.
Haldir chuckled, "It is because he spends his days practicing his lettering skills. That would be maddening work for me."
She smiled, "He probably finds standing guard for hours on end looking across the plains quite tedious."
"Oh, I am sure he does." Haldir replied, placing an arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer to him.
Indilisse stretched out beside him, her head resting upon his chest and her body touching his. It did not take her long to notice exactly what she was doing to him, but she was enjoying their conversation too much to bring up the subject. She sighed and draped an arm over his stomach, not bothering to look up at his facial features. The tensing of his body was enough to let her know that this was not beneficial to him maintaining any level of self-restraint. But being the spiteful elleth she was, all she did was smile softly and tighten her grasp around him.
"How long will the warden training last?" Indilisse asked, nestling deeper into his chest, loving the smell of woods and lie soap upon him and his tunic.
"It should last a month if all goes well." Haldir glanced down at her, and brushed back a piece of long hair from her eyes. "We have not held one in a long while, so it may take a few days to get back into the smooth running of things."
She sighed and was quiet for minute, relishing in the quiet of the glade and the methodical movement of the rise and fall of his chest. Her acute hearing picked up the rhythmic beating of his heart within his body and she closed her eyes for a few moments as he stroked along her length of hair. She wished that it could be like this all the time.
"Tell me this story you told Mornhîr last eve." Haldir said softly, stopping his stroking of her hair to run the back of his fingers lightly across her soft cheek.
Indilisse glanced up at him and smile, "It deals with a mouse and a lion."
"That is an interesting pair." He replied, "Especially after what I have heard of lions."
"They may have been mismatched, but it proves the point that even the littlest friend can make the difference in your life." Indilisse said.
"Tell me the tale." Haldir said, resting in an even more relaxed fashion back against the tree.
She looked up at him and smiled, "Once when a Lion was asleep, a little Mouse began running up and down upon him. This soon wakened the Lion, who placed his huge paw upon him, and opened his big jaws to swallow him. 'Pardon, O King,' cried the little Mouse, 'forgive me this time, I shall never forget it. Who knows but what I may be able to do you a turn some of these days?' The Lion was so tickled at the idea of the Mouse being able to help him, that he lifted up his paw and let him go. Some time after the Lion was caught in a trap, and the hunters who desired to carry him alive to the King, tied him to a tree while they went in search of a wagon to carry him on. Just then the little Mouse happened to pass by, and seeing the sad plight in which the Lion was, went up to him and soon gnawed away the ropes that bound the King of the Beasts. 'Was I not right?' said the little Mouse."
He sighed now that the story was done. "You do have a gift for telling stories, Indilisse."
"It is only a small tale." Indilisse replied, feeling a warm blush creep up to her cheeks and ears. "But I do remember the most insignificant things most of the time."
Haldir chuckled, running one of his long fingers down her jaw, to her chin. With a slight amount of force, he lifted her head up to look at him and she found the most loving smile upon his chiseled features. His gray eyes were light and for the first time since she was a small elfling, saw the amused twinkle among them as though he were not even troubled by the things he usually was. His tongue flicked out of his lips ever so surreptitiously, wetting his lips. Indilisse felt the whimper in her throat and struggled to hold it back as he leaned over her.
The hand that had been around her shoulder moved to catch her round her waist and the other slid from her cheek to her neck and fluttered behind her head as he bent to kiss her. Her breath caught in her throat as she waited to feel the softness of his lips, hoping that nothing would interrupt them this time. Dreaming about the missed chance for an intimate embrace such as this the night before had been torture for her.
It was tender at first, just a gentle pressing of his lips against hers, but slowly the pressure and intensity increased until Indilisse could feel herself grow dizzy. There was so much behind this kiss- so much that she could not sort out- that all she could allow herself to do was reciprocate his affection. The same jumble of affections she felt for her March Warden. She sighed against him, and returned his kiss, pressing her lips quickly to his to let him know that she too enjoyed this. Indilisse, however, was unable to complete the kiss she had started- left unable to share any more of her love with him- because the large hand behind her head entwined with her hair. Only slightly startled, she felt him again reclaim her lips for his own, not allowing hers.
Now she felt urgency in his kiss, his tongue flicking out against her lips. Slowly, he pushed her back upon the soft grass, and let out a soft groan when she accepted his tongue into her mouth. Then he pressed against the back of her head gently, and forced her into a more passionate kiss as his tongue plundered her mouth. Indilisse enjoyed the feeling of his weight atop her; more than anything else it made her feel safe with him like this.
She was breathless when he finally broke from her to feather her chin and jaw with kisses, light and sensuous. He was kissing her neck, nibbling his way to her ear when realization of the situation shot through her. Not now, not here. It could not happen like this. Everything in her body was screaming out for her to stop the course of this action, and yet the moment he reclaimed her lips hungrily, her resolve crumbled. Her hands snaked around his back, up his sculpted shoulders and pulled him down closer to her.
One of his proficient and nimble thumbs caressed her earlobe from beneath her hair, and grazed slowly up to the tip of her ear. Unable to restrain her pleasure from the action, she moaned lightly into his mouth. He smiled against her lips and once again deepened the kiss, their tongues fencing in an intimate dance. One of his hands traveled down her shoulder, and slowly down her chest to cup a breast from beneath the riding tunic. Haldir shifted slightly over her for better access to her and now felt his excitement pressed against her leg.
Again reality reared its ugly head. This time, however, with the situation more evident that it was heading somewhere she did wish to go, but knew was too fast, she removed her hands from his back and placed her palms upon his chest, pushing him away. It was, by far, the hardest thing she ever had to do. He broke away from her, looking at her questioningly and almost dejectedly.
"What is it?" He asked quietly, his usually smooth voice broken apart by heavy breaths and the hoarseness from his emotions.
"This is too fast, Haldir." She choked out of her closed throat. Indilisse wanted so badly to just concede to his advances, but she was not ready... and truthfully she was pretty sure he was not ready, though he would never admit it.
Haldir sighed heavily, his breathing finally under control, and picked himself up and lay next to her. He leaned over her and placed a slightly chaste kiss upon her lips and pulled back, "I am sorry, Indilisse. I should not have lost my control like that."
Indilisse smiled and placed a hand upon his cheek, caressing it softly. "Do not be sorry, Haldir. That is why I too have restraint, and in this situation I have more than you."
He let a small smile cross his lips, "I am not supposed to lose mine though."
"For an instance like this, Haldir," she paused, "I would expect you to lose control. You do not always have to be the strong one."
Haldir reached up and brushed a piece of hair from her eyes. "That is good, because I do not foresee much of a chance of me being able to sufficiently withstand these moments. I would probably take what I want if you did not."
Indilisse scoffed and batted playfully at his shoulder, "Do you only think of yourself being able to withstand them? What of me controlling my urges?"
"That is your problem." He laughed haughtily.
"You are so arrogant." She said, attempting to sit up. He grabbed her shoulders, though, and rolled her back onto the grass again, pinning her to the ground.
His thighs were on either side of hers and he leered down at her, before kissing her again passionately. "But sometimes not being able to restrain my urges are fulfilling."
"Was this a sudden urge?" She asked with a flirty smile.
"I believe it was, but the urge was to do so much more than just pin you beneath me." Haldir replied with a wicked smile.
Indilisse giggled, "So you are showing me your self-restraint? As though I had forgotten you must have control over everything."
It was his turn to scoff at her. "Maybe I will let you be in control another time."
"Oh, quiet my palpating heart." Indilisse replied flatly, "His Arrogance would actually entertain the idea to allow an elleth control."
"His Arrogance?" He questioned with a raised brow.
Indilisse smiled and pushed him off her so she could stand up and brush the grass from her leggings. Gathering the leftovers from their meal up into the sack, she glanced at him and smiled at his day-dreaming face. She sighed softly and shook her head, knowing she was really the one with all the control in this relationship.
I do not own anything that is in any way connected to Tolkien Enterprises and his estate. I own my OCs though... and color in the outlines of the lives of the elves Tolkien so wonderfully left open. Also, the stories dealing with a lion is from Aesop.
WARNING: Mention of pedophilia, as a joke, nothing more. It is in one short sentence. Get over it.
Chapter 20- Secret Places and Memories
Indilisse stood in front of her mirror, looking over her suede-cloth riding tunic and leggings. She wished that she could appear a little more feminine on their ride, wearing one of her gowns, but a mass of fabric was definitely not conducive to riding a horse properly. Riding a horse properly with a male elf directly behind her. Her heart fluttered and she swallowed hard, the butterflies moving down to her stomach as she thought of the situation that would soon be presented her when she met Haldir down at the stables. Really she did not know why she so easily excepted the invitation to go riding with him when it was nearly petrifying to her to think of all that could go on when they were to be alone.
With a heavy, but happy, sigh, Indilisse left her talan and started down the long staircases to the stables. She found Haldir leading Mornhîr out of the stables, a saddle upon the horse's wide back and a satchel attached to it that looked like if carried enough food to feed ten elves. He looked in her direction, obviously hearing her making her way towards him. Haldir smiled brightly, and turned back to the horse, giving the animal a friendly pat on his neck.
"You took more than a few moments." Haldir chided.
Indilisse scoffed, "I would like to see you disentangle yourself from yards of fabric with different ties all about your body."
"You are right, that would be difficult." Haldir nodded his head, but smiled cheekily, "But I have no problem removing them from bodies that are not my own."
She stood still, and gave him a disdainful grunt, "Oh I see. You think to win me over with your cunning use of suggestions, Haldir?"
He shrugged his shoulders and motioned with his hand for her mount the horse. Indilisse did as he wanted and placed a boot-covered foot into the stirrup of the light saddle. Upon hoisting herself up, however, she felt his strong hands upon her waist, settling her into the seat before removing his hands. Usually she would have yelled at him for thinking her incapable of mounting a horse by herself, but on this day, all she cared about was that his hands were on her waist and how wonderful they felt there, and also how gallant he was to help her up.
Indilisse grumbled to herself, I have to stop thinking like this.
In moments, Haldir had thrown his leg over the side of the horse and his warm body was slowly adjusting to the position behind her. He shifted in the saddle slightly, positioning himself so that he could comfortably sit with her in front of him. To grab the reigns, he reached around her, encircling her with his strong arms and nudged the animal beneath them into a slow walk. The sudden jarring of the movement caused her to slide back further on the smooth saddle, her backend resting inconveniently between his thighs.
She had to think of something else. Anything else. Anything other than the feeling of his body pressed to hers and sensations of having his warm breath upon her neck.
"Why are we riding with a saddle?" She asked. "Most Elvish horses do not like saddles."
"I know." Haldir replied, "But it is easier to control the horse if two people ride together in a saddle."
"Oh." Indilisse said absently, finding the feeling of the deeply-registered voice rumbling in his chest completely comforting and something she would never grow tired of feeling.
He sighed, "You act as though you have never ridden with another before?"
"Nay." She said, "Well, Ada when I was very small and could not travel alone. But those days have long since passed."
She could tell he as disappointed with that by the next tone of his voice, "You do not remember when I took you? You were only ten years old then."
Indilisse paused and thought for awhile, and then let a small smile cross her face, "I cannot believe I forgot. I begged of you to take me out with you for the longest time to the borders because Ada would never do it."
"I did not take you out either." Haldir reminded, his mood slightly happier.
"Aye, but I thought you had. When you are as small as that, even the shortest distance and the most miniscule of objects is grander than you could have ever imagined." She replied, seeing the curious glances from many elves as they made their way out of the city gates. Where was Nindë when you needed her? It would have been sweet justice to have her witness this event.
He rested his arms upon her thighs, letting the horse move on its own accord. "That is true, I must admit. I cannot imagine what something like the White Tower or the Falls of Imladris would be to someone so young."
Indilisse shrugged, "They were magnificent, but never would they compare to Lórien. This has and will always be home, no matter where I move to. And honestly, the small things amaze me more than the large things. Like watching butterflies swirl about in the air, or the marvelously private grottos you can find out of the city."
Haldir chuckled, "How do you know of these grottos, fair Indilisse? Most only know and visit them if they are trysting."
"And you do not remember that you took me to one on that very same time you took me riding?" She asked, turned her head slightly to glance at him. "Are you unwholesome to young elleths, Haldir?"
"I like to think not with the very young." He said quietly, "But you constantly point out what a depraved life I have led with the likes of Nindë. So I guess it is in the eye of the beholder."
Indilisse was quiet for a few moments, and sighed, "I do not mean what I say most of the time, Haldir. You know that has been a hex of mine since childhood."
"Aye, I know." Haldir said, leaning into her more. "Though most of what you say is true. You have an ability for stark observations."
"To put it politely." Indilisse finished for him with a slight laugh.
"And I find it refreshing. None of those pathetic elleths who only say what they think you want to hear." Haldir said. "And... honestly... as much as it chagrins me to admit this, it is helpful in putting me in my place."
Indilisse giggled, "I cannot believe that I could put you into your place, venerable March Warden of Lórien."
He laughed against her ear, but stopped and sighed slightly, "You really have no idea the affect you have on me, do you?"
"Well, considering for the longest time you could only find my faults, I thought all I inspired was resentment." She said.
"I did that so I could try to make myself believe that I did not care for you, Indilisse." Haldir admitted. Indilisse found all of this quite odd, as Haldir had never been so open with her before, and likely had never been so open with anyone like this in the past. He whispered against her ear, sending a shiver down her spine, "But I do care for you, Indilisse. More than you could possibly know."
Indilisse was silent and swallowed hard around the lump formed painfully in her throat. She wanted to tell him she loved him, but it was too soon. He would not want to hear it now. After all, he only 'cared' for her, and had not said he 'loved' her. And she was not sure if she wanted to get close to another male again, the thought that she might make the same mistake as she did in the past forever looming over her.
"Have I actually stolen the words right from your mouth?" He asked delightedly.
"Hardly." She managed to squeak out. "I was only thinking."
Haldir chuckled and directed the horse through a thick grouping of trees and they came out onto a small glade. One the far end was a clear pond, a slight waterfall cascading down the side of the wall of gray rock. Moss grew on the stone around the dark glade, and plants grew freely from the cracks in the rocks among the tiny cave carved out of the stone. It was the exact glade he had brought her to so many years ago.
"You remember where every grotto is?" She asked.
"I make it my business to know of every single part of this great forest." Haldir replied, stopping the horse and swinging down from the mount. He offered his hand to her, she took it gladly, and it seemed much to his happiness and extreme delight. He removed the satchel of food from the horse and slung it over his shoulder, taking her hand in his other.
Indilisse followed him to the place where a large tree trunk met the side of the rocky cavern, and watched him sit down, carefully positioning himself before looking up at her expectantly. She smiled and sat next to him, close enough that their shoulders were touching but far enough away that she was not on top of him. He set out the feast he had brought, and soon they were both enjoying the meal and recalling old stories and some new ones.
"Luinil is an odd elf." Indilisse had mentioned.
Haldir chuckled, "It is because he spends his days practicing his lettering skills. That would be maddening work for me."
She smiled, "He probably finds standing guard for hours on end looking across the plains quite tedious."
"Oh, I am sure he does." Haldir replied, placing an arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer to him.
Indilisse stretched out beside him, her head resting upon his chest and her body touching his. It did not take her long to notice exactly what she was doing to him, but she was enjoying their conversation too much to bring up the subject. She sighed and draped an arm over his stomach, not bothering to look up at his facial features. The tensing of his body was enough to let her know that this was not beneficial to him maintaining any level of self-restraint. But being the spiteful elleth she was, all she did was smile softly and tighten her grasp around him.
"How long will the warden training last?" Indilisse asked, nestling deeper into his chest, loving the smell of woods and lie soap upon him and his tunic.
"It should last a month if all goes well." Haldir glanced down at her, and brushed back a piece of long hair from her eyes. "We have not held one in a long while, so it may take a few days to get back into the smooth running of things."
She sighed and was quiet for minute, relishing in the quiet of the glade and the methodical movement of the rise and fall of his chest. Her acute hearing picked up the rhythmic beating of his heart within his body and she closed her eyes for a few moments as he stroked along her length of hair. She wished that it could be like this all the time.
"Tell me this story you told Mornhîr last eve." Haldir said softly, stopping his stroking of her hair to run the back of his fingers lightly across her soft cheek.
Indilisse glanced up at him and smile, "It deals with a mouse and a lion."
"That is an interesting pair." He replied, "Especially after what I have heard of lions."
"They may have been mismatched, but it proves the point that even the littlest friend can make the difference in your life." Indilisse said.
"Tell me the tale." Haldir said, resting in an even more relaxed fashion back against the tree.
She looked up at him and smiled, "Once when a Lion was asleep, a little Mouse began running up and down upon him. This soon wakened the Lion, who placed his huge paw upon him, and opened his big jaws to swallow him. 'Pardon, O King,' cried the little Mouse, 'forgive me this time, I shall never forget it. Who knows but what I may be able to do you a turn some of these days?' The Lion was so tickled at the idea of the Mouse being able to help him, that he lifted up his paw and let him go. Some time after the Lion was caught in a trap, and the hunters who desired to carry him alive to the King, tied him to a tree while they went in search of a wagon to carry him on. Just then the little Mouse happened to pass by, and seeing the sad plight in which the Lion was, went up to him and soon gnawed away the ropes that bound the King of the Beasts. 'Was I not right?' said the little Mouse."
He sighed now that the story was done. "You do have a gift for telling stories, Indilisse."
"It is only a small tale." Indilisse replied, feeling a warm blush creep up to her cheeks and ears. "But I do remember the most insignificant things most of the time."
Haldir chuckled, running one of his long fingers down her jaw, to her chin. With a slight amount of force, he lifted her head up to look at him and she found the most loving smile upon his chiseled features. His gray eyes were light and for the first time since she was a small elfling, saw the amused twinkle among them as though he were not even troubled by the things he usually was. His tongue flicked out of his lips ever so surreptitiously, wetting his lips. Indilisse felt the whimper in her throat and struggled to hold it back as he leaned over her.
The hand that had been around her shoulder moved to catch her round her waist and the other slid from her cheek to her neck and fluttered behind her head as he bent to kiss her. Her breath caught in her throat as she waited to feel the softness of his lips, hoping that nothing would interrupt them this time. Dreaming about the missed chance for an intimate embrace such as this the night before had been torture for her.
It was tender at first, just a gentle pressing of his lips against hers, but slowly the pressure and intensity increased until Indilisse could feel herself grow dizzy. There was so much behind this kiss- so much that she could not sort out- that all she could allow herself to do was reciprocate his affection. The same jumble of affections she felt for her March Warden. She sighed against him, and returned his kiss, pressing her lips quickly to his to let him know that she too enjoyed this. Indilisse, however, was unable to complete the kiss she had started- left unable to share any more of her love with him- because the large hand behind her head entwined with her hair. Only slightly startled, she felt him again reclaim her lips for his own, not allowing hers.
Now she felt urgency in his kiss, his tongue flicking out against her lips. Slowly, he pushed her back upon the soft grass, and let out a soft groan when she accepted his tongue into her mouth. Then he pressed against the back of her head gently, and forced her into a more passionate kiss as his tongue plundered her mouth. Indilisse enjoyed the feeling of his weight atop her; more than anything else it made her feel safe with him like this.
She was breathless when he finally broke from her to feather her chin and jaw with kisses, light and sensuous. He was kissing her neck, nibbling his way to her ear when realization of the situation shot through her. Not now, not here. It could not happen like this. Everything in her body was screaming out for her to stop the course of this action, and yet the moment he reclaimed her lips hungrily, her resolve crumbled. Her hands snaked around his back, up his sculpted shoulders and pulled him down closer to her.
One of his proficient and nimble thumbs caressed her earlobe from beneath her hair, and grazed slowly up to the tip of her ear. Unable to restrain her pleasure from the action, she moaned lightly into his mouth. He smiled against her lips and once again deepened the kiss, their tongues fencing in an intimate dance. One of his hands traveled down her shoulder, and slowly down her chest to cup a breast from beneath the riding tunic. Haldir shifted slightly over her for better access to her and now felt his excitement pressed against her leg.
Again reality reared its ugly head. This time, however, with the situation more evident that it was heading somewhere she did wish to go, but knew was too fast, she removed her hands from his back and placed her palms upon his chest, pushing him away. It was, by far, the hardest thing she ever had to do. He broke away from her, looking at her questioningly and almost dejectedly.
"What is it?" He asked quietly, his usually smooth voice broken apart by heavy breaths and the hoarseness from his emotions.
"This is too fast, Haldir." She choked out of her closed throat. Indilisse wanted so badly to just concede to his advances, but she was not ready... and truthfully she was pretty sure he was not ready, though he would never admit it.
Haldir sighed heavily, his breathing finally under control, and picked himself up and lay next to her. He leaned over her and placed a slightly chaste kiss upon her lips and pulled back, "I am sorry, Indilisse. I should not have lost my control like that."
Indilisse smiled and placed a hand upon his cheek, caressing it softly. "Do not be sorry, Haldir. That is why I too have restraint, and in this situation I have more than you."
He let a small smile cross his lips, "I am not supposed to lose mine though."
"For an instance like this, Haldir," she paused, "I would expect you to lose control. You do not always have to be the strong one."
Haldir reached up and brushed a piece of hair from her eyes. "That is good, because I do not foresee much of a chance of me being able to sufficiently withstand these moments. I would probably take what I want if you did not."
Indilisse scoffed and batted playfully at his shoulder, "Do you only think of yourself being able to withstand them? What of me controlling my urges?"
"That is your problem." He laughed haughtily.
"You are so arrogant." She said, attempting to sit up. He grabbed her shoulders, though, and rolled her back onto the grass again, pinning her to the ground.
His thighs were on either side of hers and he leered down at her, before kissing her again passionately. "But sometimes not being able to restrain my urges are fulfilling."
"Was this a sudden urge?" She asked with a flirty smile.
"I believe it was, but the urge was to do so much more than just pin you beneath me." Haldir replied with a wicked smile.
Indilisse giggled, "So you are showing me your self-restraint? As though I had forgotten you must have control over everything."
It was his turn to scoff at her. "Maybe I will let you be in control another time."
"Oh, quiet my palpating heart." Indilisse replied flatly, "His Arrogance would actually entertain the idea to allow an elleth control."
"His Arrogance?" He questioned with a raised brow.
Indilisse smiled and pushed him off her so she could stand up and brush the grass from her leggings. Gathering the leftovers from their meal up into the sack, she glanced at him and smiled at his day-dreaming face. She sighed softly and shook her head, knowing she was really the one with all the control in this relationship.