Chapter 5: Spacemonkey and the Pink Panther
A/N~ Wrote nothing of import in the spiral for my A/N, so not gonna type it up. By the way, I don't own the Pink Panther; just used it for the title (We were playing it in marching band when I wrote this. Yeah, last semester!). Also I was having a bad week; just keep that in mind as you read. Also, for those who don't watch Stargate, or don't know very much about it "Spacemonkey" is a nickname that Jack gave to Daniel at the beginning of season 2. OK, disclaimer time.
Me: *Is folding laundry* *Throws black sheet over head* Shire! Baggins! Scrrreeeeeee!!!!!! *cackles* Scrreeeeeeeee!!!!!
Boromir: You know you're obsessed with LotR (Which they do not own) when.
Aragorn: *shakes head* .when you act like her.
Me: Shire! Baggins! Screeeeee!!!!!!! *Hears them* *Takes off sheet* What's wrong with doing that?! It's fun! *Pulls sheet back on and continues running around the house* (I don't own that either. I got it off of a list of ways you know you've seen FotR too many times (from when it was in theaters!). I thought it was awesome & would so do if my parents didn't already think I'm nut-zo!)
Several hours after Vanessa and Aragorn's confrontation with Boromir, everyone was up. I was dragged, kicking and screaming, from my nice, warm bed.
"Rise and shine!" Courtney shouted cheerfully after I had thrown something at the door, alerting her that the knocking had in fact awoken me.
"I'll rise, but I won't shine!" I glowered at the door. "Go away and come back in 5 hours!"
"OK," Courtney said. "Just as long as you're up. Breakfast is in 10 minutes!"
"Good," I mumbled. "Ten more minutes of sleep." With that I pulled the covers back over my head to sleep some more.
"No," Haldir told me, pulling down the covers and starting to get dressed. That is a good first sight, but I all I could do was glare at him, only drawing a smile from him. "Come on; get up."
"Damn you for being a morning person," I grumbled as he started dragging me out of my bed. "AH! NO! I'm not ready to get up yet!" I tried kicking at him, seeing if he would leave me alone. No such luck.
"Too bad!" he retorted, shoving me towards my closet.
"Damn elves," I muttered and stuck my tongue out at him. He just laughed.
.~*~.
In ten minutes, I was unfortunately, at breakfast and not sleeping. Breakfast, while largely ignored on Earth, is a feast in Middle-Earth (Sorry, I didn't eat breakfast this morning.). There were piles of food everywhere on the table. We sat in pretty much the same order as the night before. As I was "mad" at Haldir for making me get up, I decided to talk to Daniel, who, I found out, is not a morning person either.
"Where's the coffee?!" Daniel growled. (Vanessa so elegantly wrote in the spiral "Up ya butt!" So nice, ain't she?)
"I don't know," I answered. "But I'd kill for some right about now!" I yawn and looked at him. "They better have caffeine and junk food here! I don't know how long my coke/junk food stash is gonna last me."
My fellow junk food/caffeine addict looked at me happily. "You brought some with you?"
"Yes," I told him, then yelled down to Aragorn. "Aragorn, where's the damn coffee?! I have a headache!" (And yet, I yell. I'm sooooo smart!)
"It's coming," he said coldly, glaring at me. He was still pissed about the Boromir clothes switch.
"Geez!" I muttered. "Someone's got a stick up his butt."
Haldir looked at me. "And how would you know that?" He raised an eyebrow and smiled.
I pouted at him. "I'm still not talking to you. I wanted to sleep but you wouldn't let me. You're mean."
"OK, fine. You can go back to sleep later," he gave in.
"Yea!" I cheered and hugged him.
"Where's Lord Boromir?" Sam asked loudly.
I looked to where Boromir should have been sitting. "I don't know, Major," I answered. "But I'll ask. Hey, Strider! Where's Pincushion Boi? If I have to be here, he has to be here!"
"Don't worry about Boromir," Aragorn answered with a cold smile. "He'll be back later."
.~*~.
".you love me. We're a happy family," Random Handmaiden #157 sang.
"NO!" Boromir shouted, pleading for mercy. "No more! Please stop! NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!"
"Sorry, sir," the handmaiden replied. "I am following King Aragorn's orders." She shrugged and looked genuinely sorry, the continued singing "Barney."
.~*~.
We finished breakfast and Boromir was still not back. Sam (Carter) was looking concerned about him. If you ask me, I'd say that a certain major had a crush on a certain Steward.
When everyone was deciding what to do with the day I said that I was gonna make good on Haldir's promise that I could sleep more and dragged him away with me. Aragorn announced that he was gonna release Boromir and do his Kingly duties of the day so that the rest of it would be free to spend with everyone else. After thinking for a moment, Vanessa decided that she was gonna "help" Aragorn with his paperwork and crap. Daniel told the remaining group, who determined that they would just sit around and talk, that he was going to spend a few hours in the library, doing what he does best- working.
.~*~.
When Haldir and I got back to our room, instead of hitting the bed to get more sleep, I grabbed one of my cokes and sat in a comfortable overstuffed chair staring off into space in the direction of the chess set.
I guess Haldir figured that's what I was looking at. "So, you're good at chess, huh?"
I jolted out of my reverie. "Yeah," I answered. "What about it?"
"I bet I could beat you," he challenged.
"Oh? Really?" I asked, never one to back down from a challenge. "I bet you can't. And, if I win, I get to sleep until I want to get up. If I lose, I'll get up early. Deal?"
"Deal," he agreed.
"Get ready to lose," I instructed him and moved towards the set. Man, winning never felt so good!
.~*~.
"Hello?" Daniel asked confuse. "Is anyone there?" When no one answered he muttered, "I could have sworn I heard something."
.~*~.
"Dead-ant, dead-ant, dead-ant, dead-ant, dead-ant, dead-ant, dead- aaaaaaaaaant," Kitty hummed the "Pink Panther" theme song as she stalked through the library shelves.
.~*~.
"Uh.guys." Legolas said. "Where's Kitty?"
SG-1, minus Daniel, Boromir, Courtney, Pippin, and Merry looked around confused. (A/N~ And Vanessa's hobbit-like appetite is confirmed. She wrote her "I ate her." which begs the questions, "what does she taste like?" and "was it worth eating one of your best friends?")
"I thought the crazy one was near you," Jack cracked.
"I don't know when she snuck away," Courtney said. "But Daniel's in the library alone and we have a missing Kitty."
A collective "Uh-oh!" permeated the room.
.~*~.
"OK, I know someone's there!" Daniel called out into the darkness of the seemingly empty library, feeling like an idiot. "Who are you?!"
"Daniel!" he heard someone squeal as a shape almost tackled him, then squeezed the air out of him as she hugged him.
"Uh.hi." He stammered. "Who are you?"
"It's me. Kitty!" she cried, sounding hurt.
"Oh.uh.of course," he stuttered, trying to extract himself from her grasp. "What are you doing here?"
"You said that you were going to work in the library and I've never seen an archaeologist/linguist work," she answered coyly, trying to sound innocent. "I thought it would be interesting to see, and maybe I can learn something. I'm sorry if I scared you, I just didn't want to interrupt you. Can I stay?" She smiled then gave him the infamous "Puppy-dog Pout."
"Ok," he agreed. "Just don't interrupt too much." He returned the warm smile her was receiving.
"Of course I won't."
.~*~.
Legolas reached the library first. What he saw was not what he expected to see. Kitty was sitting across from Daniel, talking animatedly with him, her hands covering his over the table, all seeming quite innocent. (A/N~ I don't think I punctuated that sentence correctly; either too many commas or too few. Meh, correct me if you know. And Vanessa says (I say this for Kitty's benefit), "Only on his hands? Sure." *giggle* Yes, only the hands! I'm not stupid enough to make Kits have an affair!)
"What are you doing?!" Legolas raged.
"What?" Daniel asked. Then realizing how bad the situation looked, drew his hands off the table. "We weren't doing anything, I swear!"
Legolas glared and looked unconvinced.
Kitty rolled her eyes. "We were talking about mythology and I got excited," she explained. "I was trying to make sure I had his complete attention before I asked my question."
"Suuuuuure," Courtney joked, trying to add some levity to the situation. Seeing that it didn't work, she groaned and said, "Never mind. Hey Kits. Let's go get some more food." Courtney knew that would get Kitty away from the guys and a potentially dangerous situation; Legolas's jealousy erupting.
"Fooooooood!" Kitty cried, drawing tight smiles from everyone and left with Court. Once they were gone, Legolas once again glared at Daniel.
"If you ever come near my wife again, I will shoot an arrow up your ass," Legolas threatened. (OK, disclaimer time- the "shoot an arrow up your ass" came from a good fic, "Why Leggy doesn't smile." Back to the story.)
"I'm sorry," Daniel said, not wanting to think how much having an arrow shot up his butt would hurt. "We were honestly just talking about mythology. Nothing was happening."
"Just in case," Legolas growled. "I leave you with the image of an arrow rammed up your ass." Leggy then stalked off with everyone else, leaving SG- 1 alone.
"Well, Daniel," jack commented. "It seems you've taken over T's job of making new friends." He grinned. Daniel just glared.
A/N~ OK, that's long enough! That was a fun chappie! Have fun, Nessie! *runs off to play more chess with Haldir* ^.^ And sorry for the wait between updates; been a bit busy lately. No, really, I have been busy! I'm not being lazy! *giggle* Really, it was just too much homework. Well, just remember to review! Tell us what you think! *giggles*
A/N~ Wrote nothing of import in the spiral for my A/N, so not gonna type it up. By the way, I don't own the Pink Panther; just used it for the title (We were playing it in marching band when I wrote this. Yeah, last semester!). Also I was having a bad week; just keep that in mind as you read. Also, for those who don't watch Stargate, or don't know very much about it "Spacemonkey" is a nickname that Jack gave to Daniel at the beginning of season 2. OK, disclaimer time.
Me: *Is folding laundry* *Throws black sheet over head* Shire! Baggins! Scrrreeeeeee!!!!!! *cackles* Scrreeeeeeeee!!!!!
Boromir: You know you're obsessed with LotR (Which they do not own) when.
Aragorn: *shakes head* .when you act like her.
Me: Shire! Baggins! Screeeeee!!!!!!! *Hears them* *Takes off sheet* What's wrong with doing that?! It's fun! *Pulls sheet back on and continues running around the house* (I don't own that either. I got it off of a list of ways you know you've seen FotR too many times (from when it was in theaters!). I thought it was awesome & would so do if my parents didn't already think I'm nut-zo!)
Several hours after Vanessa and Aragorn's confrontation with Boromir, everyone was up. I was dragged, kicking and screaming, from my nice, warm bed.
"Rise and shine!" Courtney shouted cheerfully after I had thrown something at the door, alerting her that the knocking had in fact awoken me.
"I'll rise, but I won't shine!" I glowered at the door. "Go away and come back in 5 hours!"
"OK," Courtney said. "Just as long as you're up. Breakfast is in 10 minutes!"
"Good," I mumbled. "Ten more minutes of sleep." With that I pulled the covers back over my head to sleep some more.
"No," Haldir told me, pulling down the covers and starting to get dressed. That is a good first sight, but I all I could do was glare at him, only drawing a smile from him. "Come on; get up."
"Damn you for being a morning person," I grumbled as he started dragging me out of my bed. "AH! NO! I'm not ready to get up yet!" I tried kicking at him, seeing if he would leave me alone. No such luck.
"Too bad!" he retorted, shoving me towards my closet.
"Damn elves," I muttered and stuck my tongue out at him. He just laughed.
.~*~.
In ten minutes, I was unfortunately, at breakfast and not sleeping. Breakfast, while largely ignored on Earth, is a feast in Middle-Earth (Sorry, I didn't eat breakfast this morning.). There were piles of food everywhere on the table. We sat in pretty much the same order as the night before. As I was "mad" at Haldir for making me get up, I decided to talk to Daniel, who, I found out, is not a morning person either.
"Where's the coffee?!" Daniel growled. (Vanessa so elegantly wrote in the spiral "Up ya butt!" So nice, ain't she?)
"I don't know," I answered. "But I'd kill for some right about now!" I yawn and looked at him. "They better have caffeine and junk food here! I don't know how long my coke/junk food stash is gonna last me."
My fellow junk food/caffeine addict looked at me happily. "You brought some with you?"
"Yes," I told him, then yelled down to Aragorn. "Aragorn, where's the damn coffee?! I have a headache!" (And yet, I yell. I'm sooooo smart!)
"It's coming," he said coldly, glaring at me. He was still pissed about the Boromir clothes switch.
"Geez!" I muttered. "Someone's got a stick up his butt."
Haldir looked at me. "And how would you know that?" He raised an eyebrow and smiled.
I pouted at him. "I'm still not talking to you. I wanted to sleep but you wouldn't let me. You're mean."
"OK, fine. You can go back to sleep later," he gave in.
"Yea!" I cheered and hugged him.
"Where's Lord Boromir?" Sam asked loudly.
I looked to where Boromir should have been sitting. "I don't know, Major," I answered. "But I'll ask. Hey, Strider! Where's Pincushion Boi? If I have to be here, he has to be here!"
"Don't worry about Boromir," Aragorn answered with a cold smile. "He'll be back later."
.~*~.
".you love me. We're a happy family," Random Handmaiden #157 sang.
"NO!" Boromir shouted, pleading for mercy. "No more! Please stop! NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!"
"Sorry, sir," the handmaiden replied. "I am following King Aragorn's orders." She shrugged and looked genuinely sorry, the continued singing "Barney."
.~*~.
We finished breakfast and Boromir was still not back. Sam (Carter) was looking concerned about him. If you ask me, I'd say that a certain major had a crush on a certain Steward.
When everyone was deciding what to do with the day I said that I was gonna make good on Haldir's promise that I could sleep more and dragged him away with me. Aragorn announced that he was gonna release Boromir and do his Kingly duties of the day so that the rest of it would be free to spend with everyone else. After thinking for a moment, Vanessa decided that she was gonna "help" Aragorn with his paperwork and crap. Daniel told the remaining group, who determined that they would just sit around and talk, that he was going to spend a few hours in the library, doing what he does best- working.
.~*~.
When Haldir and I got back to our room, instead of hitting the bed to get more sleep, I grabbed one of my cokes and sat in a comfortable overstuffed chair staring off into space in the direction of the chess set.
I guess Haldir figured that's what I was looking at. "So, you're good at chess, huh?"
I jolted out of my reverie. "Yeah," I answered. "What about it?"
"I bet I could beat you," he challenged.
"Oh? Really?" I asked, never one to back down from a challenge. "I bet you can't. And, if I win, I get to sleep until I want to get up. If I lose, I'll get up early. Deal?"
"Deal," he agreed.
"Get ready to lose," I instructed him and moved towards the set. Man, winning never felt so good!
.~*~.
"Hello?" Daniel asked confuse. "Is anyone there?" When no one answered he muttered, "I could have sworn I heard something."
.~*~.
"Dead-ant, dead-ant, dead-ant, dead-ant, dead-ant, dead-ant, dead- aaaaaaaaaant," Kitty hummed the "Pink Panther" theme song as she stalked through the library shelves.
.~*~.
"Uh.guys." Legolas said. "Where's Kitty?"
SG-1, minus Daniel, Boromir, Courtney, Pippin, and Merry looked around confused. (A/N~ And Vanessa's hobbit-like appetite is confirmed. She wrote her "I ate her." which begs the questions, "what does she taste like?" and "was it worth eating one of your best friends?")
"I thought the crazy one was near you," Jack cracked.
"I don't know when she snuck away," Courtney said. "But Daniel's in the library alone and we have a missing Kitty."
A collective "Uh-oh!" permeated the room.
.~*~.
"OK, I know someone's there!" Daniel called out into the darkness of the seemingly empty library, feeling like an idiot. "Who are you?!"
"Daniel!" he heard someone squeal as a shape almost tackled him, then squeezed the air out of him as she hugged him.
"Uh.hi." He stammered. "Who are you?"
"It's me. Kitty!" she cried, sounding hurt.
"Oh.uh.of course," he stuttered, trying to extract himself from her grasp. "What are you doing here?"
"You said that you were going to work in the library and I've never seen an archaeologist/linguist work," she answered coyly, trying to sound innocent. "I thought it would be interesting to see, and maybe I can learn something. I'm sorry if I scared you, I just didn't want to interrupt you. Can I stay?" She smiled then gave him the infamous "Puppy-dog Pout."
"Ok," he agreed. "Just don't interrupt too much." He returned the warm smile her was receiving.
"Of course I won't."
.~*~.
Legolas reached the library first. What he saw was not what he expected to see. Kitty was sitting across from Daniel, talking animatedly with him, her hands covering his over the table, all seeming quite innocent. (A/N~ I don't think I punctuated that sentence correctly; either too many commas or too few. Meh, correct me if you know. And Vanessa says (I say this for Kitty's benefit), "Only on his hands? Sure." *giggle* Yes, only the hands! I'm not stupid enough to make Kits have an affair!)
"What are you doing?!" Legolas raged.
"What?" Daniel asked. Then realizing how bad the situation looked, drew his hands off the table. "We weren't doing anything, I swear!"
Legolas glared and looked unconvinced.
Kitty rolled her eyes. "We were talking about mythology and I got excited," she explained. "I was trying to make sure I had his complete attention before I asked my question."
"Suuuuuure," Courtney joked, trying to add some levity to the situation. Seeing that it didn't work, she groaned and said, "Never mind. Hey Kits. Let's go get some more food." Courtney knew that would get Kitty away from the guys and a potentially dangerous situation; Legolas's jealousy erupting.
"Fooooooood!" Kitty cried, drawing tight smiles from everyone and left with Court. Once they were gone, Legolas once again glared at Daniel.
"If you ever come near my wife again, I will shoot an arrow up your ass," Legolas threatened. (OK, disclaimer time- the "shoot an arrow up your ass" came from a good fic, "Why Leggy doesn't smile." Back to the story.)
"I'm sorry," Daniel said, not wanting to think how much having an arrow shot up his butt would hurt. "We were honestly just talking about mythology. Nothing was happening."
"Just in case," Legolas growled. "I leave you with the image of an arrow rammed up your ass." Leggy then stalked off with everyone else, leaving SG- 1 alone.
"Well, Daniel," jack commented. "It seems you've taken over T's job of making new friends." He grinned. Daniel just glared.
A/N~ OK, that's long enough! That was a fun chappie! Have fun, Nessie! *runs off to play more chess with Haldir* ^.^ And sorry for the wait between updates; been a bit busy lately. No, really, I have been busy! I'm not being lazy! *giggle* Really, it was just too much homework. Well, just remember to review! Tell us what you think! *giggles*