A/N yeah I'll just update some more and yeah I guess this has been done a
lot but I don't often read Harry Potter FF so I really don't know . well
any ways on with the story.
Chapter 2
Harry looked out his window staring at the stars. When he was younger he would always make a wish on the brightest star there. But now that he was older and been through much more he knew that, that wouldn't do anything. He'd always wish that his parents where back or that the Dursleys would finally accept him. Both of these he knew were not going to happen anytime soon.
Depressed again Harry turned from the window and back to his books. He never was much of a reader but he had nothing better to do. He'd already done his homework for the summer, albeit he knew it wasn't at all very good, but he did give a damn anymore. Instead he became engrossed with the older muggle books. Like the old fairy tales, Count Dracula, To Kill a Mocking bird and a lot of other books he borrowed from the library that Private Drive had a few blocks away from the house. He'd also sent an owl to Flourish and Blotts requesting the old fairy tales and older popular books, so that he could waste time and have a new out look at the wizarding world.
Again that night he got almost no sleep, though this time he had no idea why. Normally something like a nightmare would wake him, but this night something else did.
Looking at the clock Harry sighed noticing it was 3:17 'wow' he thought, 'a good three and a half hours of sleep.' No tonight he woke up for no reason. For some reason though he felt something in the pit of his stomach. Remorsefully like dread, but he didn't dwell on it. 'If something was going to happen to day', he thought 'Let it come.'
Today he was reading DRACULA, he found it interesting to read story's having to do with dark creatures like this Nosferatu. He read (in the wizard books) all about their creatures. And every one of these were something he complemented that Hagrid would find friends with. He'd gotten lots of books with information about veelas, hipshrinks, dragons, valetaas, faries, elves, and a lot of other mysterious and magical animals.
Slowly he set the book down and became lost in his own thoughts. This summer hadn't been all that bad. The Dursleys made sure to shower him with all the chores that they could find. God he thought he had painted the same fence three times that week they had been worried about the 'dirt' that had 'appeared' on the fence. Them being them of course just put the blame on top of his waiting shoulders.
He just put on a mask of indifference when ever they told him to do chores showing that he really could care less. But other then the over load of chores they had pretty much ignored him much to his own surprise.
Looking at the clock on his bedside table he started heading down stairs to cook breakfast for his 'loving' family. Making the usual helping of bacon, eggs, and toast, (Dudley's diet hadn't been working so the family had just dropped it sadly enough) so because Harry was the one cooking they made no expense in making sure that they got enough every morning.
Harry didn't eat breakfast, he only really bothered himself to eat lunch when ever it was convenient. While everything was cooking he walked upstairs to get dressed. All he really wore was black baggy pants and a black shirt with chains (A/N just think goth not too hard is it . this is how most of my friends and me sometimes dress I find it intimidating so were gonna pretend that's how Harry sees this.) Harry head some grumbling coming from his aunt and uncles room, walking downstairs he set out the finished breakfast on top the table and stood to the side waiting to get his daily list of chores. As his aunt and uncle came down they handed him the list he looked at it;
Boy, all this had better be done by the time I get home from
work or you know the consequences White wash fence mow lawn weed front garden cook lunch and dinner clean our the garage dust around the front and living room wash dishes
This was the normal list that Harry got every day some times they
added a little more but this was about it. He ran upstairs and grabbed
his Discman (he found it in his room buried under a bunch of stuff
Dudley didn't want and apparently this style of Discman had gone our
of style and he had gotten a new one) He slipped in a CD and he
listened to it as he did the gardening.
I'm tired of being what you want me to be
Feeling so faithless lost under the surface
Don't know what you're expecting of me
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
Harry never really did understand but this song really went along with
how he usually felt now-a-days. Noticing how unless he did everything
perfectly and how every one wanted he was pushed away and shunned.
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I've become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you
Can't you see that you're smothering me
Holding too tightly afraid to lose control
Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
And every second I waste is more than I can take
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I've become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you
And I know
I may end up failing too
But I know
You were just like me with someone disappointed in you
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I've become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I'm tired of being what you want me to be
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I'm tired of being what you want me to be
This song really was like how he felt now show he really had few
feelings left. Anger Hatred and deceit was about the only things that
he still could feel. That's why he cut himself he guessed. He wasn't
sure if there was any part of him left to feel anything besides the
hateful thoughts. The other reason being that he deserved the pain
simple as that.
He picked up the tools finally finishing his gardening and slipped
inside the house to begin with the rest of his chores.
A/N As u can pry guess the NUMB song is property of Linkin Park so well just saying that I don't own it. So please read and review . tootles
Chapter 2
Harry looked out his window staring at the stars. When he was younger he would always make a wish on the brightest star there. But now that he was older and been through much more he knew that, that wouldn't do anything. He'd always wish that his parents where back or that the Dursleys would finally accept him. Both of these he knew were not going to happen anytime soon.
Depressed again Harry turned from the window and back to his books. He never was much of a reader but he had nothing better to do. He'd already done his homework for the summer, albeit he knew it wasn't at all very good, but he did give a damn anymore. Instead he became engrossed with the older muggle books. Like the old fairy tales, Count Dracula, To Kill a Mocking bird and a lot of other books he borrowed from the library that Private Drive had a few blocks away from the house. He'd also sent an owl to Flourish and Blotts requesting the old fairy tales and older popular books, so that he could waste time and have a new out look at the wizarding world.
Again that night he got almost no sleep, though this time he had no idea why. Normally something like a nightmare would wake him, but this night something else did.
Looking at the clock Harry sighed noticing it was 3:17 'wow' he thought, 'a good three and a half hours of sleep.' No tonight he woke up for no reason. For some reason though he felt something in the pit of his stomach. Remorsefully like dread, but he didn't dwell on it. 'If something was going to happen to day', he thought 'Let it come.'
Today he was reading DRACULA, he found it interesting to read story's having to do with dark creatures like this Nosferatu. He read (in the wizard books) all about their creatures. And every one of these were something he complemented that Hagrid would find friends with. He'd gotten lots of books with information about veelas, hipshrinks, dragons, valetaas, faries, elves, and a lot of other mysterious and magical animals.
Slowly he set the book down and became lost in his own thoughts. This summer hadn't been all that bad. The Dursleys made sure to shower him with all the chores that they could find. God he thought he had painted the same fence three times that week they had been worried about the 'dirt' that had 'appeared' on the fence. Them being them of course just put the blame on top of his waiting shoulders.
He just put on a mask of indifference when ever they told him to do chores showing that he really could care less. But other then the over load of chores they had pretty much ignored him much to his own surprise.
Looking at the clock on his bedside table he started heading down stairs to cook breakfast for his 'loving' family. Making the usual helping of bacon, eggs, and toast, (Dudley's diet hadn't been working so the family had just dropped it sadly enough) so because Harry was the one cooking they made no expense in making sure that they got enough every morning.
Harry didn't eat breakfast, he only really bothered himself to eat lunch when ever it was convenient. While everything was cooking he walked upstairs to get dressed. All he really wore was black baggy pants and a black shirt with chains (A/N just think goth not too hard is it . this is how most of my friends and me sometimes dress I find it intimidating so were gonna pretend that's how Harry sees this.) Harry head some grumbling coming from his aunt and uncles room, walking downstairs he set out the finished breakfast on top the table and stood to the side waiting to get his daily list of chores. As his aunt and uncle came down they handed him the list he looked at it;
Boy, all this had better be done by the time I get home from
work or you know the consequences White wash fence mow lawn weed front garden cook lunch and dinner clean our the garage dust around the front and living room wash dishes
This was the normal list that Harry got every day some times they
added a little more but this was about it. He ran upstairs and grabbed
his Discman (he found it in his room buried under a bunch of stuff
Dudley didn't want and apparently this style of Discman had gone our
of style and he had gotten a new one) He slipped in a CD and he
listened to it as he did the gardening.
I'm tired of being what you want me to be
Feeling so faithless lost under the surface
Don't know what you're expecting of me
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
Harry never really did understand but this song really went along with
how he usually felt now-a-days. Noticing how unless he did everything
perfectly and how every one wanted he was pushed away and shunned.
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I've become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you
Can't you see that you're smothering me
Holding too tightly afraid to lose control
Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
And every second I waste is more than I can take
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I've become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you
And I know
I may end up failing too
But I know
You were just like me with someone disappointed in you
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I've become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I'm tired of being what you want me to be
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I'm tired of being what you want me to be
This song really was like how he felt now show he really had few
feelings left. Anger Hatred and deceit was about the only things that
he still could feel. That's why he cut himself he guessed. He wasn't
sure if there was any part of him left to feel anything besides the
hateful thoughts. The other reason being that he deserved the pain
simple as that.
He picked up the tools finally finishing his gardening and slipped
inside the house to begin with the rest of his chores.
A/N As u can pry guess the NUMB song is property of Linkin Park so well just saying that I don't own it. So please read and review . tootles