Well I'm back! I really haven't written anything for the past week because of all the debating preparation we had to do. Well the debate's over now, I accidentally did something that I'm really embarrassed off now, but WE WON THE DEBATE! YAY! Therefore it puts me in a good mood and I decided that I've been much too hard on my characters and if I pushed them any further into depression, this fic would turn into some Prozac Nation type of story. So yeah, let's make things better for them, eh?

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CHAPTER 14 : Men Do Not Cry

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"Excuse me." Boromir stepped round Aislin without even adjusting his stride. She stared after him, unable to push away the heartache. Had she truly become invisible to him?

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Faramir watched Aislin, noted the pain in her eyes. He felt terrible. He had caused this, just by his silence. And there was just one thing he could do to put it right. But it was so difficult to do it. He sighed, turning away. He was a weakling.

Why am I torturing her, if I love her so?

He turned back to face Aislin, seeing her calmly clearing the table. At least to one who did not know her, that was what she seemed to be doing. But he knew better. He knew that she was holding back her tears, and she banged the plates together a little harder than was necessary. If this went on, she would lose her mind. They all would.

But would he not lose his mind as well, if he let her go?

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Aislin curled up into a ball on her bed and sobbed into her pillow. Maybe I've really gone insane, she thought to herself.

It had been a very, very bad week. Boromir was completely ignoring her, as he had been doing for such a long time. Every single time he walked by she felt the pain, and she thought that things could get no worse. But it had got worse. Now Faramir had started avoiding her as well. She didn't know why, didn't know what it was she had done, but she hadn't spoken to him for three days and today he was going back to Osgiliath again. Everything was so horrible right now.

She forced herself to dry her tears and get out of bed. Things might be bad, but there was always work to do, and that was probably the only thing that was keeping her sane for the moment. Life had to go on, there was just no other way.

She went to the kitchens, and got work from the cook. Then she lost herself in kneading dough, staring right through the dough, through the table, staring into infinity. She heard nothing, and felt nothing, and therefore it was especially startling when someone tapped her on her shoulder.

"I need to speak to you," Faramir said quietly, and turned before she could say anything. That left her with no choice but to follow dumbly after him.

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Faramir led her to a quiet spot behind the kitchens. "What is it, Faramir, what do you want to say?" Aislin asked.

Faramir sighed, looking down at his shoes. "Why do you stay with me, Aislin?"

Aislin took a step back in surprise. Of everything that she had expected him to say, this was the last. Faramir looked at her sadly and continued. "Do you love me, Aislin?"

"What are you saying, Faramir? Of course I love you," Aislin told him, taking his hand. And she meant it as well.

"But it's not the way I want you to, is it?" Faramir held onto her hand as if he could not bear to let go. "You love me as a brother, Aislin, and I do not think that I can ever ask more from you."

Aislin bowed her head, knowing that what he said was true. Faramir was so dear to her; he had become the brother she never had. And now there was just no point pretending that she would marry him any day. There was no use pretending anymore. Faramir knew and there was no way she could avoid hurting him. "I'm so sorry…"

"There's no need to be sorry. Actually… I've known for such a long time, but I just couldn't find a way to let you go. I should be the one who's sorry." Faramir sighed and gave Aislin a kiss on her forehead. "I suppose that was the last time I'd do that," he told her softly. "My brother loves you, you know. He thinks he's hiding it but he can't hide from me. And I know you love him too. I've stood between the both of you too long, and it's just not right."

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Faramir rode away from Minas Tirith and did not look back. Inside everything was jumbled up. He did not know whether to smile for his brother and Aislin, or to cry for himself. He did not know if he had done the right thing. He did not know whether he should continue to ride away or try to turn back time.

All he knew was this: men do not cry.

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Aislin stood outside Denethor's hall, waiting for Boromir to emerge. He had to come out eventually, hadn't he? She really needed to speak to him. What Faramir said to her had turned things around completely.

The doors opened and Boromir strode out. He looked surprised when Aislin fell into step next to him. "What are you doing here?"

Aislin brushed away his question. "Did Faramir speak to you?"

"Of course he did… he just said goodbye to me this morning…"

Aislin shook her head. "No, that's not what I wanted to speak to you about. He came to look for me today, and he… he let me go."

Boromir's eyes widened. "What do you mean, he let you go?"

"He told me that we can't hide from him anymore… and he said that he was sorry."

Boromir stopped walking and pushed his hair out of his eyes. "I have to think about this. I'm sorry, Aislin," he said. Then he turned and walked away from her.