Author's note: No… I do not hate Jack Sparrow or Johnny Depp. I'm just trying to make it a non- mushy story. I try to imagine how people experience me when I'm having a bad day… So I guess you all know how I'll react when I'm hung over… for example. Creepy thought…
Disclaimer: I have a partner in crime!! She and I are pondering how to steal POTC. Until then, we don't own any of those character. Oh, and I asked my parents.. it appears that I don't even own myself…
How predictable it may be, we find Ilona and Jack again in Will's blacksmith. Ilona looking a little bit cross, and Jack being upset with her. I wonder why sniggers
"If ya didn't want to be 'ere, then why did you come along with me?!" He yells at me. I don't like being yelled at. "Because my bloody necklace was attached to your stupid shirt! And if you'll excuse me, I'll be leaving now" I'm striding towards the door when Jack grabs me by my collar: "Oh no you don't. You got me in this 'ere mess, an' you'll be getting me out of it" No one, I repeat, nó one just grabs me by my collar as if I'm a disobedience little puppy: "Release me.. and I mean right now!" He doesn't seem impressed by my Look, I'm incredibly angry with you look.
Argh! I start to hate.. sorry… dislike pirates a lot. "Bloody (censored due to young readers reading this and me not wanting to change the rating). You bit me!" Jack released his grip on my dress. … erhm… wait.. did I just said dress? I'm wearing a dress? "WHOA" Jack seems to be amusing himself with the unconscious drunk bearded fellow. I'm staring down at my newly acquired dress.. it's pink! It's very pink! It's pink with all sort of fluffy things on it! I never wear dresses.. It's not because I don't like them.. it's just because.. well.. I'm not a dress person. But I certainly strongly have a disliking feeling against anything pink. Hears clinging, you know.. the sound of a hammer against an anvil "That's not going to work you know?" I sigh, still looking disgustedly at my dress.. my awful fringy pink dress.
Then I hear someone taking an iron out of the fire: "NO! Don't even think about that!" I yell: "Let me lead the donkey forward.. without hurting it by any sort of way". Just as in the movie, Jack barely has been released from his chains when Will walks in. Jack flees into a corner of the workshop. I, as always, just stand there: "Good afternoon mister Turner, could you be so kind to help me with a little problem? I need to find a phone and some normal clothing because I.." By looking at his eyes I just know that I can stop talking, he doesn't have a clue what I'm babbling about.
"If you're looking for the one who has used your hammer, he's over there" I point at Jack as I sit down on the nearest anvil. "You're the one they're searching" "You look familiar, have I threatened you before?" Since they're busy with each other, I'll try to sneak out without Jack noticing me. Ha! I made it as far as the door already! Twoioioing A sword almost cut my ear off, and is now sticking in the door. Angry I turn around: "Hey! You aren't supposed to do that! You should do that with him!" I point at Jack again "You are screwing up the whole script!" "You are going nowhere, as far as I'm concerned you're with him" Will says, before he grabs another sword.
"No fair" I mutter, as I'm looking at the all too familiar scene happening in front of me. One thing they don't show in the movie though, is the little fellow who wakes up and hits Jack on the head with the bottle.. That makes my day a bit. I'm only wishing that I could do that. Norrington bursts through the door and leads us to the brig. He doesn't even listen to my protests! It's a disgrace. "I'll decide about you tomorrow" he says to me.
In the brig, Ilona is trying not to touch anything. Have you ever seen those cells? They're absolutely disgusting! The rats are the cleanest creatures that walk there… imagine what the pirates must look like…
"This is all your fault! If you hadn't kidnapped me.." "I didn't kidnap ya! I just kinda used ya to get out of tha' situation! If you just stayed on that there platform we wouldn't.." "Don't you even think about blaming this whole situation on me! If you would've stayed with the blasted story.." Jack is looking furious now: "Stop babblin' about that bloody story! Story this, movie that, script so" He is mimicking me! "Heck woman, I don't even know wha' those scurvy words mean!" My face is turning red.. I know it: "You.. you.. you.. you..YOU!" I turn my back at him and am giving him the silent treatment. That'll teach him.
Two hours later Ilona's head feels like it has hit a brick wall…
"Great, not only does my head hurt, but it sounds like the Black Pearl has arrived here too" I warn the pirate in the cell next to me: "And I certainly do NOT want to hear about those stories. I already know you've heard the stories about the Black Pearl not leaving any survivors and stuff". The pirate doesn't even bother to ask me how I know that.. I think it has something to do with me yelling and shouting at them for the last two hours. A headache can make a person quite cranky. Jack doesn't seem troubled by my mood though: "No survivors? Then where do the stories come from I wonder?" He asks while grinning that grin he grins in the movie. I throw my shoe at his head.. unfortunately I missed. And I've finished another chapter! Yay.. This is getting fun. Hope you guys don't mind me disliking Jack a bit in the story. In real life I adore Johnny Depp. But I also adore my boyfriend, and he and I have arguments too all the time. So I thought me en Jack could have some issues too
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Arsinoe Selene & Anita Lawn: Yay... does this now mean I'm brilliantly insane?
Laughing like a mad scientist