Chapter Four

The Journey Finally Begins

A week later

Raistlin was relaxing for once. He had finally been able to copy all of his memorized spells into the spell book. Once that was done, the spells he did not know in Palin's spell book he copied into his own and then set Palin's respectably away. He allowed himself a moment of regret. Caramon walked in and asked, "Oh, you have a new spell book. What was wrong with the old one?"

"... Things change, Father," he answered sadly. "It didn't feel right. And this way I have a time capsule to remind me of how far I came to get here."

Caramon was also silent, as if sensing the mood in the room for the regrets that palled his son. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Raistlin turned to regard his brother, and with his face turned obliquely he really looked at his brother. Caramon had aged, but Raistlin supposed children did that. If he should be so lucky to gain the laugh lines from children that Caramon wore proudly. One more regret to add to the swiftly growing pile. "No," he answered in a low, near whisper.

"What will you do now?"

Raistlin turned back to the window where the three moons hung. Solinari seemed to be waning, and... he sucked in a breath then looked down at the hem of his robe. He backed away from the window and sat down heavily in the chair. Caramon got up anxiously, "What is it?"

Mutely, Raistlin pointed to the hem of his robe. Where the borders of his sleeves and the bottom of the robe had been black as Nuitari's dark side, now they were grey with a satiny red filigree. Caramon looked up at him, "Uh, wasn't that black before?"

Nodding, still in wordless shock. "Before... while I couldn't see it clearly... I could see the shadow of Nuitari. Now, all traces are gone in the night sky to me except of where he would be and where that moon blots out the stars," Raistlin looked up to the luminous red moon. "But now I see... it not."

Caramon looked at his son, finally comprehending. "That means that you are... redeeming where you nearly fell?"

"More than you know, more than you know," mused Raistlin.

The next day

The warmth of the sun filtering in between the shutters warmed Raistlin's face before he awoke, and given that he had stayed up late to make sure that his books were in order, he stayed asleep.

Tanin gently closed the door, fairly certain that he hadn't disturbed his Uncle's rest. If Raistlin and Palin had been anything alike, the next morning after a late study session would mean that his head would feel stuffed full of cotton batting and he would have a bit of a headache from all the thinking. He walked quietly down the steps and into the common room.

His father looked up at his entrance, "Palin still asleep?"

"Hmm?" Tanin looked up, then remembered his conversation with Raistlin. "Yes, he is."

"I would guess he's tired. He studied late," Caramon chuckled. "So much like Raistlin, except so different."

"Different? How?" asked Tanin, sitting on one of the stools across from his father at the bar.

"Well, Palin is..." Caramon thought for a moment. "Palin does things for other people more than himself. Raistlin was the opposite. Oh, he would help you, if there was something to be gained by it. Well, perhaps that's unfair. His acts of kindness were completely random, but held no less meaning than do Palin's. But, now that I think on it, after the Test he became more and more heartless and uncaring."

Tanin leaned back on the stool in thought. "Did... did you love him any less?"

"Oh, Gods no," said Caramon. "I loved him more, thinking that if I flooded him with love perhaps he could change. Could perhaps let himself feel love. But, he felt the opposite. Like I was smothering him, choking him worse than his health." Sadly Caramon looked at Tanin. "Perhaps... he didn't want to get hurt. He was a very sensitive person. In that Palin and he are alike. Perhaps he forced himself to become callous in order for life not to hurt."

At the top of the stairs, Raistlin leaned against the wall and listened to his brother, eyes vaguely glassy. He had been on his way down for something for breakfast, and something for his headache when he had heard his name being spoken. Stopping to listen as Caramon told Tanin what he truly thought of him was both painful and touching.

"Perhaps he forced himself to become callous in order for life not to hurt..."

At this, Raistlin, unable to keep control of his emotions any more tore himself away from the front stairs and ran for the back stairs. Running down the steps he ran into the stables. Leaning against the wall and sliding down it he allowed himself the release he needed as his tears ran freely down his cheeks. Raistlin let his head sink down to his shaking hands.

Look at yourself, he chided himself. Crying like a baby because you heard him talk kindly, if truthfully, about you.

Pathetic wretch. Is that a heart? came a darker, more feminine voice. I didn't realize you had one.

Shut up, he told Her. You don't know me, you never will.

Oh I know enough, Wizardling, came the voice of the Dark Queen. So, this is where you hide. Remember, I can find you where ever you go, what ever you do. What a lovely little lie you have built yourself there, Child of Night. How easy it would be for me to send one of my Knights to retrieve you and burn that village to the ground for harboring a fugitive.

Raistlin sucked in a breath as his heart seemed to pound. "Don't you touch them!"

"Touch who Palin?" asked Dezra as she came into the stables.

Raistlin stood shakily, as if unsure if this was the dream and the former conversation was the reality. Shaking himself, he answered, "No one, Dez, no one. I'll take care of it."

He touched her on the head as he walked out, a worried frown on his face as he turned back to look at her go about caring for the horses. Thin cold fingers of fear settled over his heart. What was he doing? What did he possibly think he could achieve by trying to be Palin? If he remained more bloodshed would result. He wasn't saving them at all, if anything he was only putting them in only more danger by remaining one more single day.

Turning resolutely he walked back up to his rooms and began to pack...

Tanin heard the sudden movement at the top of the stairs, and knew that Raistlin had heard everything. For a moment he wasn't sure what kind of reaction that might make. He was aware of his Uncle's sudden departure and as soon as he could end the conversation with Caramon, he did. "I never knew that about Uncle Raistlin. The tales don't say even that much," said Tanin standing up. "I think I had better see what Sturm is up to..."

Tanin walked back up the stairs and watched as his Uncle, in too much of a hurry to notice him, fairly ran into his rooms. Walking to the open door and looking inside, he watched in fascination as Raistlin packed his gear. "Where are you going?" asked Tanin.

Raistlin looked up, startled. "Don't sneak up on me like that!"

"Sorry," said Tanin as he walked in and closed the door. "But you appear to be leaving us. Why?"

"The longer I stay here the more you all are in danger," answered Raistlin. "I can't do this again. I won't sit by and watch... I can't."

Tanin crinkled his brows. "So you're running?"

"Yes," Raistlin pulled shut the last of his gear and threw the saddlebags over his shoulder and picked up the Staff of Magius.

Taking Tanin's shoulders in hand, he said in a low whisper. "Tanin, please understand. Your father is very correct about me," said Raistlin. "But know this too; if anything ever happened to you, your sisters, your brothers, and your parents it would kill me. The longer I stay, the more danger Solace is in. I leave to protect it."

"I don't understand," stated Tanin.

"Nor do you," retorted Raistlin gently. "Ah, Tanin, you are like your namesake, that much is clear. Do me a favor and watch over them like you namesake would?"

"I can't do that," said Tanin, a sudden gleam coming into his eye.

"Why not?" Raistlin was not in a mood to play games.

"Because I'm coming with you."

"No," Raistlin smiled and looked down. "Tanin, you have any idea what that would mean? Please, stay where you are needed."

Tanin nodded and put on hand on Raistlin's shoulder. "Be safe, Uncle."

"Be safe, Nephew," Raistlin put his hand on the knob but turned back. "Tanin?"

"Yeah?"

"At least see me off?"

"Sure," Tanin smiled through the tears that threatened to fall. "I can at least do that."

Tanin watched as his Uncle rode off into the noon time sun. He watched until he could no longer see him in the distance. A few hours later Sturm found him in the same spot, leaning on a rail on one of the tree bridges in town. "Have you seen Palin?" asked Sturm.

Tanin looked up, tears brushed away, then answered. "He's gone."

Sturm stared at his older brother. "What do you mean 'gone'?"

Tanin pointed to the East. "He rode off without us, my brother. On a mission of some sort. He goes where we cannot follow."

His brother's eyes went completely wide in shock, "YOU LET HIM GO BY HIMSELF?! Father is going to kill us! We have to go after him!"

Tanin put a restraining hand on Sturm's shoulder, "Sturm..."

"We'll get fresh horses, supplies..."

"Sturm!"

"I have to sharpen my sword, bandits have been on the move lately," Sturm cursed but Tanin's hand clamped down on his wrist.

"STURM!!" Tanin shouted, then saw that he had his younger brother's attention. "I offered to go with him, but trust me on this, Palin can take care of himself. He told me to make sure that Solace was guarded. I think whatever is after Solace will require our swords than he does... if whatever it is isn't lured away by his leaving."

Until that last part Sturm was nodding in agreement, "Are you telling me this 'whatever-thing-that-could-kill-us-all' is actually after Palin? And that he left to lure it away to save Solace?"

Tanin thought for a moment, "Yes."

"ARE YOU CRAZY?! We have to go after him! He could get killed!"

Tanin sighed. So much for his word to his Uncle...

Raistlin had ridden the better part of the day to the East, not even sure where he was going until he noticed that he was in the Plains of Abansinia. Sighing, he stopped and then let himself get his bearings. Where could he go where the threatening hand of the Dark Queen could not reach him?

He realized that, really, no where could hide him. He was probably doomed to a life as a wanderer. Like Marion was.

He smiled and looked down at the Blue Star, "Amazing how you got me into this mess."

The stone seemed burn with a blue fire deep within the flawless royal blue sapphire stone. He sighed. Suddenly his horse reared and he was thrown to the ground. Reflexes made him roll before arrows rained down where he had been. His horse lay not to far away in death throes, an arrow deep within its throat and another in its heart.

Unfortunately, when he had fallen, he was on one side of the horse, and the Staff of Magius was on the other. Thankfully he had fallen on the side opposite of the bandits and therefore had cover. He began to cast a spell when he was interrupted from his casting by a massive half orc swinging his club. Raistlin cut off the words of magic to dazedly, and clumsily fend off the blow.

He was knocked a good couple of feet by the force of the contact to land in a heap. Raistlin coughed and tried to bring up his left arm for a quick spell. The pain that arced up fizzled that spell, and told him that his arm was broken, useless. Perhaps a few of his ribs too. All he could was lay on the ground and moan in pain.

The half orc towered over him. "Not so tough, are you Wizard?" the half orc leaned down, and grasped the arm that was broken, pulled Raistlin to a standing position.

Raistlin, against whatever control he might have had, screamed with the agony that caused. The half orc pulled back one fist as he held Raistlin up. "That was for me brother, who you took out with magic purple darts. This is for Broken Tusk clan," the huge fist slammed into Raistlin's mid-section and it felt like his fist went through.

Pain ripped through the entirety of Raistlin who felt like his insides had been ripped out. This pain robbed him of breath to even scream, but he did anyway. He screamed without sound, mouth open and air only whistling. He was suddenly dropped to the ground as the half orc made a grunting sound before turning in rage to the new person.

A woman born of the Plains of Dust, of the desert, dropped her short bow in favor of the scimitar she truly favored. She was regal, and her skin was the shade of tan that reminded one of deserts and sand. Her black hair was braided into many thin dreadlock braids and fell down to her mid back. She even more the flowing desert garb.

She was unlike anyone in Abansinia had ever seen.

Raistlin opened the one eye he could and smiled at the sight. He knew her, and knew her abilities. The Broken Tusk clan was in for a fight.

The half orc charged her and she moved gracefully out of the way, her scimitar slicing open a cut on his back as he went by her. He turned in rage, and bellowed, "How dare you!"

"How dare you attack one of Miiro's chosen," she retorted, her accent giving away her decent from the Harems of the desert nomads of Khur. "Leave now and I won't kill you."

"Foreigner."

"Abomination."

"Die woman!" he charged her again.

In one quick movement she had run him through, slicing him from his gut and all the way around and under where his legs split into each other as she ducked under and through his legs. On the other side, she said simply. "Or in this case, it was for me to kill you."

The others of the bandit clan, now that their leader had been cut down, fled.

The woman ran over to Raistlin, sheathing her scimitar as she did so. Cradling him, she said, "Leaving the safety of Solace was foolish, Guardian of the Blue Star."

"How... How did you find me?" he asked, as if he really needed to.

"How do I always find you, shah?" she answered. "You simply require me."

She laid him gently on the ground and lit a fire in the dying sunlight. Using her cloak as a blanket she laid him in it. "Your injuries are severe," she said, lightly touching his forehead. "Sleep now."

Raistlin made a motion to protest put found that his lips could not form words anymore and the welcome oblivion of sleep took away the pain.

The next morning, the patrol for the Que-Shu found Raistlin leaning against his dead horse, unconcious. Any traces of the woman were gone, except for the cloak and the very dead half-orc. "By Mishakel," murmured the man as he recognized, or thought he did, the young man. Yelling to his companion. "Come quickly, I think this is Caramon Majere's son, Palin!"

The other ran up and touched his neck. Raistlin moaned. Given time he would heal, but right now he was in a lot of pain. Gentle hands lifted him and he remembered no more.

A few days later Tanin and Sturm happened upon the dead half orc bandit, and Tanin's heart sank when he saw the bloody mess by the dead horse. Sturm said quietly, "We should have been here."

Tanin could only wordlessly nod, even as his mind mulled over what in this world could take on Raistlin and actually win when Raistlin had taken on the Dark Queen on her own plane and won. Somehow, if something had gotten the better of Raistlin, he got the feeling that it would have mattered little if they had been here to back him up. But he couldn't tell Sturm this... Sturm would only maintain that somehow that the three of them would have succeeded where one would have fallen.

As Tanin searched around, he saw that there was no body. This gave him a sliver of hope that he might see Raistlin alive again. He turned to Sturm, "He's still alive. They took him with him."

Sturm's lips compressed into a thin line, "We have to find him. He could be hurt."

"He likely is. Somehow I feel that would be the only way he could have been possibly captured alive," answered Tanin dryly.

The two brothers looked at each other, and Tanin said darkly, "We go orc hunting."

A not so nice smile spread across Sturm's face as he fingered the hilt of his sword.

A/N Miiro: Methinks Raistlin's in a worse pickle now...

A/N: Terrence: I finally beat Kris in the plot twist catagory! Terrence 1 - Kris 2... oh, wait, she still has me beat...

Response to reviews:

Thank you to Smenzer, Guan and Sabrina for reviewing the last chapter and the one before (we forgot to thank you last time, lol)

Palin wasn't so much a 'terrible' wizard so much as he was inexperienced. In D&D, Palin was only 3rd level where Raistlin was nearly 24th. If Palin had the chance, without the Gods leaving in the Fifth Age, he would have been as great, or greater than Raistlin. (I think Raistlin even said as much, lol) That's how Tanin figured him out, btw. Raistlin has to be more careful about his use of magic or else he's going to be figured out by others.

... Perhaps even... Caramon? ;)