Chapter 22 The Journey Home
The bathroom door is shut now. He is getting ready to go. His clothes were all cleaned, but when we realized everyone would know if he came back too spruced up that he had been off somewhere else, we remedied with a little washable watercolor paint in all the right colors, all the right places.
I feel excited, yet fearful at the same time. A part of me feels relived for him, that he can now be reunited with his friends and loved ones, free to be who the blessed Valar created him to be. That other part of me, though, is a mixture of sadness, trepidation, and loneliness that even those words do not express properly.
I know that I will be forever grateful to him for all he has taught me about life, and love, and letting go, and being free. He is so young at heart, yet so ancient in his ways at the same time. My life is forever richer having spent just this little piece of eternity with him.
Knock it off, al, I tell myself. It won't do for you to let him see you this way. Must keep up the Fantasy Island façade so that he will always fondly remember his trip. Blinking back the tears that threaten to fall, I rise from my chair and head down the hallway. My heart stops at the closed bathroom door.
Wafting softly on the air, wending its way through the crack around the doorframe, I hear the most melodious fair tenor voice, singing:
Babe I'm leaving
I must be on my way
The time is drawing near. . .
I cannot catch the sob before it escapes my throat.
"al? Iz dat u?" he calls from the other side of the door.
I swallow hard, and bite the inside of my cheek until I can taste the blood.
"al?" he calls again.
I hear the clink of the hairbrush being laid on the bathroom counter. I cannot hear him move to the door, though I am certain he is coming. I toss my head, shaking off the sadness, and put on the mask I will wear tonight. My happy face. The one with the crows feet at the corners of my eyes, from too much smiling all the young years of my life. I turn my back to the door, wanting to buy myself just a second more. . . . .
"THE PLANE! THE PLANE!" I exclaim, as he pulls open the door to find me grinning madly over my shoulder at him and pointing to the ceiling as if to the sky.
"U ar too talle tu be Tatoo," he scolds with a radiant smile on his glowing face. There has to be nothing more beautiful than one of the Eldar race when they are happy, I think.
"I hope you are not ever planning to tell the guys about Fantasy Island," I tease him. "There are some things about Modern Earth I want you to forget, ok?"
"Dere ar sum thangs I WAENT tu furgit!" he giggles.
"Come, let me look at you," I ask him, pulling him by the hand behind me down the hall and into the den where the light is better and there is more room. I pull him a little harder before letting go, twirling him around into a spin. "Perfect," I say. "Every little hair in place."
"Weel, I have bean doin my owen hare for over 2 thozand yeerz," he scoffs.
"You know that is not what I meant," I retort, wagging my finger at him. "It was a . . . "
"I noe, a feegur of speech," he interrupts. He pauses, looking intensely at me. "Tuern arond, led me luuk at u," he says, taking my own hand and giving me a little spin. My magenta velvet dress swirls about my legs, my black elven boots turning the tight pirouette he leads me in.
"Thank you for doing my hair," I say, blushing under his scrutiny.
"U ar welkum. I thank my faevorit paert is steel da faek poented eerz." He smiles, then winks at me. "And I weel be da oenly won whoe weel noe!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Babe I'm leaving
I'll say it once again
And somehow try to smile
I know the feeling we're trying to forget
If only for awhile
'Cause I'll be lonely without you
And I'll need your love to see me through
Please believe me
My heart is in your hands
'Cause I'll be missing you
Babe I love you
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
My worries of how we will sneak Legolas into the theater dressed in his Middle earth garb are soon worries no longer. It seems all of Middle earth has turned up for this party. There are human replicas of Aragorn, Faramir, Eowyn, and Eomer, as well as barefooted wee folk with curly hair everywhere. The taller ticketholders are doing pretty fair imitations of our favorite elves too. There are even a couple of wizards and orcs about. Legolas is by far the most realistic looking, of course.
With our tickets in hand, we join the line that is already progressing through the doors to the lobby. I take the ticket stub from Legolas after the theater ticket taker tears it in half. Yes Dear hands me his stub as well as he passes through.
"Ar u goen tu maek anuthr kullekshun?" the Prance asks me, referring to the stack of 24 tickets I have kept marking each time I have attended FOTR, and the second stack of tickets I kept for every person I managed to coerce into seeing it with me.
"Oh yeah, baby," I say, winking and waving the stubs at him. "I've got one now for me, and two for the sucker pile." This brings a laugh from him.
As we reach the theater entrance, Legolas suddenly pulls me aside, saying to Yes Dear, "Jest a minit, pleeze, I nead tu tael al sumpthin."
Yes Dear nods, silently understanding, and proceeds down the aisle to hold our seats.
As the hoards of people pass us by, full of anxious anticipation, the Prance of Mirkwood leans toward me, his lips all but brushing my left ear. "I waent tu kees u, but I caen't," he says.
My heart screams 'Kiss me, Kiss me!' but my mouth says, "I know. I'm married, you shouldn't."
"Noe, dat iz not it," he whispers. "If I kees u, I weel krie."
I pull back to gaze into his baby blues. His eyes are tearing, as are mine. Quickly, in order to save us both, I switch to my trademark humor. "You are an elf worrier. You don't cry," I tease.
He straightens up, standing tall and lean, a real fighting machine. "Das rite. I em an Elf Worrier." He smiles, and everything we have shared in the past 9 months passes there between us, all in a silent moment filled with that smile.
The flood of midnight premier moviegoers becomes a trickle as the last of the lucky ticket holder's file in, popcorn and soda in hand. "You don't have any candy in your pockets, do you?" I chide. "You know we talked about how you have to go back in just like you came out."
"Noe," he answers with another wide grin. "Due I hav tiem tu git won laest Peenuat Budder Kuep?" He moves as if to return to the concession counter, teasing with me. As he does so, I hear the opening music, and a cheer rises up from within the theater. The movie is starting.
Our eyes meet. He takes my hand, and together we walk into the darkened theater for the last time.
Stopping at the right hand corner of the screen, I whisper to him, "No bell, nin caun. No beren."
"Alcar achas, Arwenamin," he whispers to me. "Pan nath no mae."
Squeezing my hand one last time, he smiles at me in the darkness of the theater, then turns away, moving to his place nearer the screen, as I do to mine, seven rows up on the left-hand side where my Yes Dear awaits me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It is everything I hoped for, and more.
I stayed in my seat through the credits as always, once again paying homage to those underlings who bring the coffee and wash the costumes. The ones who lay out the clothing and make sure the meals are eaten. The ones who make sure everyone is in the proper place when they are supposed to be. I will forever remain one of them.
Once again everything in my life has changed. As it has in his world as well.
For you see, Legolas Greenleaf, Prince of Mirkwood and member of the Fellowship of the Ring, no longer lives in the closet at my house. This is the end of my part in his story.
The house lights come up, and once again I notice Yes Dear and I are the last to leave the theater.
"I need to go to the restroom," Yes Dear says. "Do you want to stay here for a few more minutes?"
I nod my head yes, as it is all I can do right now. As he leaves, I venture to the front of the theater, to the right hand corner of the screen, hoping beyond hope that, by some miracle of fate, I will come upon him there, as before.
But I am alone, once again.
Legolas is gone.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
No bell, nin caun. No beren.
Be strong, my prince. Be bold.
Alcar achas, Arwenamin. Pan nath no mae.
Do not fear, my lady. All will be well.
Song lyrics for "Babe" can be found on the Styx Cornerstone Album.
"Fantasy Island" reruns can be found on your local cable TV channel.
The bathroom door is shut now. He is getting ready to go. His clothes were all cleaned, but when we realized everyone would know if he came back too spruced up that he had been off somewhere else, we remedied with a little washable watercolor paint in all the right colors, all the right places.
I feel excited, yet fearful at the same time. A part of me feels relived for him, that he can now be reunited with his friends and loved ones, free to be who the blessed Valar created him to be. That other part of me, though, is a mixture of sadness, trepidation, and loneliness that even those words do not express properly.
I know that I will be forever grateful to him for all he has taught me about life, and love, and letting go, and being free. He is so young at heart, yet so ancient in his ways at the same time. My life is forever richer having spent just this little piece of eternity with him.
Knock it off, al, I tell myself. It won't do for you to let him see you this way. Must keep up the Fantasy Island façade so that he will always fondly remember his trip. Blinking back the tears that threaten to fall, I rise from my chair and head down the hallway. My heart stops at the closed bathroom door.
Wafting softly on the air, wending its way through the crack around the doorframe, I hear the most melodious fair tenor voice, singing:
Babe I'm leaving
I must be on my way
The time is drawing near. . .
I cannot catch the sob before it escapes my throat.
"al? Iz dat u?" he calls from the other side of the door.
I swallow hard, and bite the inside of my cheek until I can taste the blood.
"al?" he calls again.
I hear the clink of the hairbrush being laid on the bathroom counter. I cannot hear him move to the door, though I am certain he is coming. I toss my head, shaking off the sadness, and put on the mask I will wear tonight. My happy face. The one with the crows feet at the corners of my eyes, from too much smiling all the young years of my life. I turn my back to the door, wanting to buy myself just a second more. . . . .
"THE PLANE! THE PLANE!" I exclaim, as he pulls open the door to find me grinning madly over my shoulder at him and pointing to the ceiling as if to the sky.
"U ar too talle tu be Tatoo," he scolds with a radiant smile on his glowing face. There has to be nothing more beautiful than one of the Eldar race when they are happy, I think.
"I hope you are not ever planning to tell the guys about Fantasy Island," I tease him. "There are some things about Modern Earth I want you to forget, ok?"
"Dere ar sum thangs I WAENT tu furgit!" he giggles.
"Come, let me look at you," I ask him, pulling him by the hand behind me down the hall and into the den where the light is better and there is more room. I pull him a little harder before letting go, twirling him around into a spin. "Perfect," I say. "Every little hair in place."
"Weel, I have bean doin my owen hare for over 2 thozand yeerz," he scoffs.
"You know that is not what I meant," I retort, wagging my finger at him. "It was a . . . "
"I noe, a feegur of speech," he interrupts. He pauses, looking intensely at me. "Tuern arond, led me luuk at u," he says, taking my own hand and giving me a little spin. My magenta velvet dress swirls about my legs, my black elven boots turning the tight pirouette he leads me in.
"Thank you for doing my hair," I say, blushing under his scrutiny.
"U ar welkum. I thank my faevorit paert is steel da faek poented eerz." He smiles, then winks at me. "And I weel be da oenly won whoe weel noe!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Babe I'm leaving
I'll say it once again
And somehow try to smile
I know the feeling we're trying to forget
If only for awhile
'Cause I'll be lonely without you
And I'll need your love to see me through
Please believe me
My heart is in your hands
'Cause I'll be missing you
Babe I love you
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
My worries of how we will sneak Legolas into the theater dressed in his Middle earth garb are soon worries no longer. It seems all of Middle earth has turned up for this party. There are human replicas of Aragorn, Faramir, Eowyn, and Eomer, as well as barefooted wee folk with curly hair everywhere. The taller ticketholders are doing pretty fair imitations of our favorite elves too. There are even a couple of wizards and orcs about. Legolas is by far the most realistic looking, of course.
With our tickets in hand, we join the line that is already progressing through the doors to the lobby. I take the ticket stub from Legolas after the theater ticket taker tears it in half. Yes Dear hands me his stub as well as he passes through.
"Ar u goen tu maek anuthr kullekshun?" the Prance asks me, referring to the stack of 24 tickets I have kept marking each time I have attended FOTR, and the second stack of tickets I kept for every person I managed to coerce into seeing it with me.
"Oh yeah, baby," I say, winking and waving the stubs at him. "I've got one now for me, and two for the sucker pile." This brings a laugh from him.
As we reach the theater entrance, Legolas suddenly pulls me aside, saying to Yes Dear, "Jest a minit, pleeze, I nead tu tael al sumpthin."
Yes Dear nods, silently understanding, and proceeds down the aisle to hold our seats.
As the hoards of people pass us by, full of anxious anticipation, the Prance of Mirkwood leans toward me, his lips all but brushing my left ear. "I waent tu kees u, but I caen't," he says.
My heart screams 'Kiss me, Kiss me!' but my mouth says, "I know. I'm married, you shouldn't."
"Noe, dat iz not it," he whispers. "If I kees u, I weel krie."
I pull back to gaze into his baby blues. His eyes are tearing, as are mine. Quickly, in order to save us both, I switch to my trademark humor. "You are an elf worrier. You don't cry," I tease.
He straightens up, standing tall and lean, a real fighting machine. "Das rite. I em an Elf Worrier." He smiles, and everything we have shared in the past 9 months passes there between us, all in a silent moment filled with that smile.
The flood of midnight premier moviegoers becomes a trickle as the last of the lucky ticket holder's file in, popcorn and soda in hand. "You don't have any candy in your pockets, do you?" I chide. "You know we talked about how you have to go back in just like you came out."
"Noe," he answers with another wide grin. "Due I hav tiem tu git won laest Peenuat Budder Kuep?" He moves as if to return to the concession counter, teasing with me. As he does so, I hear the opening music, and a cheer rises up from within the theater. The movie is starting.
Our eyes meet. He takes my hand, and together we walk into the darkened theater for the last time.
Stopping at the right hand corner of the screen, I whisper to him, "No bell, nin caun. No beren."
"Alcar achas, Arwenamin," he whispers to me. "Pan nath no mae."
Squeezing my hand one last time, he smiles at me in the darkness of the theater, then turns away, moving to his place nearer the screen, as I do to mine, seven rows up on the left-hand side where my Yes Dear awaits me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It is everything I hoped for, and more.
I stayed in my seat through the credits as always, once again paying homage to those underlings who bring the coffee and wash the costumes. The ones who lay out the clothing and make sure the meals are eaten. The ones who make sure everyone is in the proper place when they are supposed to be. I will forever remain one of them.
Once again everything in my life has changed. As it has in his world as well.
For you see, Legolas Greenleaf, Prince of Mirkwood and member of the Fellowship of the Ring, no longer lives in the closet at my house. This is the end of my part in his story.
The house lights come up, and once again I notice Yes Dear and I are the last to leave the theater.
"I need to go to the restroom," Yes Dear says. "Do you want to stay here for a few more minutes?"
I nod my head yes, as it is all I can do right now. As he leaves, I venture to the front of the theater, to the right hand corner of the screen, hoping beyond hope that, by some miracle of fate, I will come upon him there, as before.
But I am alone, once again.
Legolas is gone.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
No bell, nin caun. No beren.
Be strong, my prince. Be bold.
Alcar achas, Arwenamin. Pan nath no mae.
Do not fear, my lady. All will be well.
Song lyrics for "Babe" can be found on the Styx Cornerstone Album.
"Fantasy Island" reruns can be found on your local cable TV channel.