They're Just Words
(Early Season 7)
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He hasn't said it since he's been back.
He's alluded to it. Many times. But never actually voiced the words.
He used to say it all the time. When I didn't want to hear it..when I did and yet would never admit to it. I guess I kinda got used to it. Now I miss it.
I always think he's about to say it. He gets that look, the 'pre-saying-it' look. I used to run from that look. Now I wait eagerly but he's been following the look with different words since he came back.
"Are you real?"
It's like he doesn't want to waste the words on me in case I may just be a figment of his imagination. Or like said figment of his imagination has made him afraid to say it.
I never did. I responded cooly..cruelly. But I watched my step because I wanted to hear it from time to time.
"Tell me you love me."
"I love you. You know I do."
"Tell me you want me."
"I always want you. In point of fact.."
Now as I watch him fighting his inner battles, I feel horribly selfish. My pathetic little want to hear those three words is nothing compared to his inner turmoil and what he's done for me. It should be proof enough, the torture he's put himself through. Yet I dare ask to hear it? After all I've done to him already?
No, I won't. I'll just sit and wait.
I could say it first. But that would ruin my hard earned reputation.
(Early Season 7)
-------------------
He hasn't said it since he's been back.
He's alluded to it. Many times. But never actually voiced the words.
He used to say it all the time. When I didn't want to hear it..when I did and yet would never admit to it. I guess I kinda got used to it. Now I miss it.
I always think he's about to say it. He gets that look, the 'pre-saying-it' look. I used to run from that look. Now I wait eagerly but he's been following the look with different words since he came back.
"Are you real?"
It's like he doesn't want to waste the words on me in case I may just be a figment of his imagination. Or like said figment of his imagination has made him afraid to say it.
I never did. I responded cooly..cruelly. But I watched my step because I wanted to hear it from time to time.
"Tell me you love me."
"I love you. You know I do."
"Tell me you want me."
"I always want you. In point of fact.."
Now as I watch him fighting his inner battles, I feel horribly selfish. My pathetic little want to hear those three words is nothing compared to his inner turmoil and what he's done for me. It should be proof enough, the torture he's put himself through. Yet I dare ask to hear it? After all I've done to him already?
No, I won't. I'll just sit and wait.
I could say it first. But that would ruin my hard earned reputation.