Disclaimer: You know the deal…JK Rowling is the literary genius who owns Harry Potter. I only own the plot.
Author's Notes: Here it is, at long last. I am so sorry that it took so long to get this to you. Things have been busy, and then I had writer's block. Here it is.
Chapter Six: Unexpected Strengths, Rage, and the Planning of Sweet RevengeThe next morning, Harry felt someone gently shaking his shoulder. Reluctantly, he opened his eyes. He sat up and put his glasses on. He saw Remus standing next to him with a faint smile on his tired face.
"Morning sleep head," said Remus amusedly.
"Morning, Moony," Harry replied.
"Sleep well?"
"Actually, yeah.
For the first time in a long time."
"Good. Well, get dressed. Then come down to the kitchen and eat breakfast. After that, some members of the Order are coming over for a meeting, and you need to be there."
"I actually get to be at a meeting?" Harry asked, incredulous.
"Yes. Dumbledore feels that we should include you in some of the things we discuss, not all of them mind you, but some of them."
"Great. I'm glad people are finally deciding to bring me out of the dark on a few things. Well, I'll go take a shower. See you downstairs."
"Okay. Hurry up. Molly and Ron are going into Diagon Alley today and I thought you might like to get some new clothes."
"I could definitely use some clothes," said Harry with some bitterness.
"For today, Molly shrunk a pair of your pants and a shirt."
"Good. Well, I'll see you in a little bit."
Remus walked out of the room, and Harry got out of bed. He was feeling a lot better. He stretched and reached for his pack of cigarettes. He lit one and sat on the bed. He thought of what would happen if Mrs. Weasley decided to walk into the room. He laughed to himself.
Blowing out some smoke, he heard a knock on his door.
"Come in," said Harry before taking another drag on the cigarette.
Remus walked into the room. "Harry, Severus would like to speak with you. Is that all right?"
"Fine," Harry replied, blowing out some smoke.
A few moments later, Snape walked awkwardly into the room. Harry looked at his professor before dousing his cigarette. He was about to light another, but he threw the pack to Snape instead.
"Thanks, Potter," Snape said, closing the door before lighting a fag.
"You can keep the rest of the pack if you want, Professor. I have a whole carton almost."
"Thanks. Listen, Potter, we need to have a talk."
"No offense, sir, but I really don't feel like getting into an argument right now, so if it could wait for later, that would be nice."
"I'm not here to start a bloody argument. I want you to know, that I accept your apology about being in my thoughts. As wrong as it was, I can see that you were truthful in your apology. I am here to offer you Occlumency lessons again."
"Thank you, sir. I accept your offer, and I promise to stay out of your thoughts from now on. I need the lessons, and I really appreciate you taking the time to give them to me."
Snape seemed taken aback, so he merely took another long drag on his cigarette and blew it out slowly. Harry was pulling a breath on his second one, waiting patiently for Snape's reply.
"We'll discuss a starting time at the meeting later on," Snape said, dousing his cigarette and heading for the door.
Without another word, the door was closed once more, and Harry was left to himself. He finished his fag and went into the bathroom.
For the first time in a while, Harry didn't cut himself before he got into the shower. He merely undressed, got in the shower, and let the hot water pour down on him. With each pass of soap, he felt as though tons of filth and weight were washing off him.
Harry took his time getting ready. His reflection was still scary, but his eyes were no longer sunken in, and there was more life in those striking emerald orbs. He was still very skinny, and the cuts all over his arms were an annoying reminder of his stupidity.
Back in the bedroom, Harry saw, for the first time, a picture hanging on the wall. It was a picture of Harry's parents, Sirius, Remus, and baby Harry. Lily was holding Harry, James beside her, with Sirius beside James, and Remus on the other side of Lily.
Looking at that picture, Harry felt something deep within him burst. It was as though a long over due volcano had erupted inside his heart. A rage such that he had never felt before flowed through him. It wasn't, however, a reckless rage like he had displayed in Dumbledore's office, and in his own room. This was a very precise and calculated rage. It was the kind of rage that made men dangerous. It brought on a kind of precision and dangerousness that reminded Harry of those men that he had read about who were in the army and had seen and caused so many deaths that they were experts.
It flowed through Harry's entire being. He shook all over. His eyes, which had still been slightly dull when he had looked at them in the mirror only moments ago, turned into a brilliant emerald green. They shone with an animal fierceness. Harry knew what he was going to do. Everyone had offered to help him in his quest for Voldemort, and he was going to let them do it. But there were many things that he was going to do himself.
Looking away from the picture, Harry tried to calm himself down. He didn't want Remus or anyone else to know that something was wrong. After a few moments of deep breathing, he achieved a calm enough state that his rage was not visible on the outside.
He calmly walked out of his room and down the stairs into the kitchen. Everyone, which was Remus, Molly Weasley, and Ron, looked up when he walked in. He smiled as reassuringly a smile as he could muster. They smiled back.
Harry's breakfast consisted of two pancakes, sic pieces of bacon, a slice of buttered toast, a glass of pumpkin juice, and a glass of milk. Remus looked shocked that Harry was eating so much. Mrs. Weasley looked pleased.
After breakfast, Mrs. Weasley and Ron left for Diagon Alley with the rest of Harry's money from last term. They were going to buy him some new clothes while they went to pick up Hermione.
The meeting wasn't due to start for another couple of hours. Much to Remus' enjoyment, Harry brought down Sirius' guitar and played a few songs. He played: Just Like You (By: 3 Days Grace), A Place for My Head (By: Linkin Park), and Fight for Your Right to Party (By: The Beastie Boys). They laughed and told jokes. Remus shared a few of stories of when he was at Hogwarts.
There were usually pauses when it came to mention of Sirius, but they worked past those. Harry, for the first time in a long time, was smiling and laughing genuinely.
As happy as he felt, though, deep in him, that rage that he felt earlier had not dulled. If anything, it continued to grow. As Harry sat there with Remus, the happiness made his anger rise. Happiness and a normal life were what Harry desperately wanted, and Voldemort was making them nearly impossible to achieve.
Remus must have sense a subtle change in Harry because he looked at him worriedly.
"Harry, are you alright?" he asked.
"Yeah. I'm fine. Why?"
"You just seem a little edgy right now, that's all."
"Oh. Well, I think all of us are a bit on edge lately."
"Very true. You know, it's almost time for the meeting, so why don't you put that guitar back in your room, and then come back down here."
"Alright."
Harry walked upstairs. In his room once more, he saw that picture again. Immediately, that calculated rage tore through his entire body. His hand started to shake, and his eyes were alight with the feelings flowing through him. He looked away. He couldn't afford to let his emotions come through. He had to keep them in check.
To calm his nerves, Harry pulled a cigarette from his pack. He inhaled slowly, and exhaled at the same speed. Slowly, his body began to calm. His muscles relaxed some, and his hands stopped shaking.
Harry reminded himself to not look at the picture. There would be plenty of time for anger and expression of feelings later. Dousing the last of his fag, The-Boy-Who-Lived walked back downstairs. Members of the Order were already beginning to show up. Harry took his seat next to Remus.
Remus threw a worried expression towards him, and Harry smiled reassuringly. Dumbledore began to speak to those present. (Arthur Weasley, Kingsley Shacklebot, Severus Snape, and Mad-Eye Moody)
"Good afternoon everyone. Thank you all for coming. As you will have noticed, young Harry is joining us today. I'm sure those of you who didn't know are glad to see that he is well and kicking. Or almost, anyway. Well, having said that, on to other business."
Dumbledore went on to talk about what he felt should be done about Harry and his well-being. Harry felt as though his presence in the room made no difference to anyone except Remus. Dumbledore would say something about what he thought someone should do to help Harry, while The-Boy-Who-Just-Wouldn't-Bloody-Die sat and listened to it all.
All the while this was going on, there were many things he wanted to say, but he didn't. He had a much more important thought on his mind: revenge. He had been silently brooding about it ever since he first had seen that picture. Revenge was what was keeping him going now. Revenge was what kept Harry from shouting at Dumbledore that he didn't need or want anyone's help.
The thirst for revenge was both sweet and bitter inside his mouth. He was hardly even listening to what anyone was saying until he heard someone mention Sirius' name. That got Harry's full attention.
"As you all are aware," Dumbledore was saying, "our Sirius Black died in the fight at the Department of Mysteries. Apparently, he had known that sooner or later, he was going to die, and he prepared for this. As painful as I am sure this is for many, if not all, of you, it is time to hear Sirius' will."
"His will?" Harry asked aloud.
Closing Comments: I know, aren't I just terrible? Sorry everyone, but Sirius' will is meant for the next chapter. You'll just have to continue reading.