A/n- this is a fic I wrote after watching Attachment. I think Susan has a past that she is hiding, and even though it's probably not this big… oh well. And note, some things Susan has said in the past episode are starched, okay, I know, but deal with this.

Warning- contains child abuse, both physical and sexual. Be warned this is a dark fic.

Past Scars

I don't no exactly where it started. But my guess is when I first saw those beautiful blue eyes. The first time she caught my eyes I would say. I'm still married in a way, but that, that is a thing of the past. Today is now and now, now I am in the same room, I am in the same five foot area of this angel. But she's not an angel. Close, but there is something missing, something about her past that makes her have those bitter moments. At first, at first I thought it was her fiancée, but it was easy to tell it was something before that. Branca was full of secrets, secrets I needed to know.

I watch as she slowly guides the little girl away from the fire. Unlike her, this little girl is innocent. But Susan, she could never be innocent, like she could never be an angel. But I can tell; anyone could that she once was. She was probably the most fun loving little girl, but like the little girl she is leading right now, all that ended because of someone else.

VVVV

"What's your name sweetie?" Branca asked the five year old.

"Taylor. What's yours?" she asked.

"My names Susan Branca, but you may call me Susan," Susan said with a smile.

"My... mommy's inside, are the big men going to save her?" Taylor asked, eyes bright blue.

"They're trying. Honey, can you go with this man to a safe place?" Branca asked, leading Taylor to a black car.

"Will you be there?"

"I will be there as soon as possible," Susan said, bending down to her level.

"Please don't leave me," the little girl cried.

"Honey," Branca aid, pulling her into a hug, "I have to finish something here, and I will be there," she said with a small kiss.

"Promise?" the girl asked with puppy dog eyes.

"Promise," she said with a smile as she placed her in the car and buckled her up.

Susan waited until the car was out of sight before heading to find her partner.

VVVV

The young Susan Branca walked home, backpack held tightly close to her as she walked up to the door. Fidgeting with her key, she placed it in the door and turned it. Today was her fourteenth birthday, and though it was already three o'clock, nobody had even given a glimpse of notice to the face. She noticed that no cars where out in the driveway, but still, he could be inside. He could still be there, inside.

Walking in the door slowly, she looked for clearance and held her breath as she walked over to the couch where it laid, empty. Letting herself breath, she shrugged her bag off and placed it near the wall as she left for the kitchen.

Susan noticed a not laying crisp on the counter top, ink pen lying across it.

Susan,

I'm sorry to do this to you, but mom had a heart-attack and I had to get there. Tim said he would watch you and I shouldn't be longer than a week. I'm sorry, but Tim and I both agreed that you were too young to have to go through and it is pretty far away, so please be good for Tim and I will call you tonight. Please only call for emergencies.

Love,

Mom

"Shit..." Susan said, wiping a tear that trickled down so slowly. Tim and her mother had gotten married about a year ago. He was really nice when her mom was around, but when ever she worked late, or if he got out of school...

Susan got out her algebra and started to work. It was something she learned from her mother- when stressed, pissed off, or depressed, busy yourself with worked. She had been using this since her father died about four years ago.

"SUSAN?" a voice boomed as the door opened about an hour later. She kept quiet against her better judgment. "Why the hell didn't you answer me? What you too lazy?" the tall, well built man asked.

"I'm... I'm sorry," she mumbled, pushing her brown hair out of her face as she tried to concentrate on her homework. She screamed when her paper and pencil jumped up as he slammed his fist against the other end of the table.

"Sorry? I'll show you sorry!" he said, going over to the other side of the table and pulling her up by the back of the neck like a cat does to a kitten, but harsher. After Susan was fully standing, he let go.

Susan, afraid to look at him, but more afraid not too, turned, but backed away ever so easily.

"Now, let's get something straight girl, I'm in charge since your mom's gone, and since I care so much, I took off the week so I can help out around her, you go t that?" The young girl gave a slight nod but didn't make eye contact. "Good, now go change into something a little more appealing before Jason and Rick get here," he said, pushing her towards her room. Susan gulped before picking up her work and carrying it back to her room.

She opened her closet to the back where the clothes he bought for her were. Noticing there was a different one in front, she decided it best to wear that one.

Taking off her top, she examined it closely. Noticing her sports bra would show and it had a built in one, she took it off and slipped on the tight light blue colored top. Then she looked at the skirt her had chosen. It was short, and would barely cover anything if she decided, or was forced, to sit. Pulling it off the hanger she noticed a black thong, and grabbed it as a tear trickled down her cheek again.

Ever since her father died, she used to cut herself. Then when Tim came alone and started this "game" with his friends, she moved from cutting her arm to her waist area. Since she never cut that deep, the scars on her arm faded slowly, and she would use excuse that they were old cuts from trees or animals.

It was Rick who first noticed the cutting on her waist. Rick had pulled her into sit on his lap during a football game and started to feel up her shirt to her breast. Getting off on that, Tim offered his room to him. Rick carried Susan in there kicking and screaming, all which were muted by him throwing her on the bed. Ripping off the shirt, he smiled a crooked smile.

"Did I make you do that?" he asked, running his hands over them. Susan just stayed still, tears trickling down her cheek. "God," he whispered, before pulling off her jeans and then taking off his own. That was the first time Susan was raped but it was far from her last. But it was the last time she cut herself.

"Hey, hurry up in there!" Tim yelled before opening a door to a trance Susan holding the black thong.

"Do you like?" he asked, "I thought it would fit you perfectly. I'll even help you put it on," he offered gently.

"It's okay," Susan mumbled, looking down. Tim did this often while she was dressing for when Rick or Jason came over. He would be extremely nice like, and treat her like a little child. Truth was, at age thirteen, she had never wore a thong, but ever since Tim, it became an often thing.

"No, come over here," he said, sitting on her bed. She hesitantly walked over the two steps in front of him. He smiled as he unbuttoned her jeans and pulled them down. She stepped out of them when they were around her ankles and kicked them softly over. She knew she shouldn't make any other movement to move them or it might put some warning flag for Tim and he would get forceful. Tim next sat her on his lap like a child and pulled off her panties. Taking the thong from her shaking arms, he slid them up her legs until they got to the top were he kept he hand on the inside for about a minute, feeling around. Grabbing the skirt, he put that on too and then made her model the outfit.

"Perfect. Do you like it?" Susan knew she must nod. "When I saw it, I knew a slut like you would." He said the insult as if it was a complement before leaving the room. Susan would stay in the room for at least an hour, until they were drunk and would then call her.

VVVV

Susan walked down the hallway; following the directions she was given. Opening the door near the one was mirror, she saw the young girl, playing with a doll.

"Susan!" Taylor said, jumping up and hugging Susan tightly.

"Hello Taylor," she said, bending down to greet the younger girl. "Did you find mommy?"

"Honey, first we need to talk about your stepfather," Susan said, her words making Taylor go back to sitting.

"I don't like him," she pouted.

"Honey, he can't ever hurt you again," Susan said, knelling down by her.

"But he will! Every time mommy leaves," Taylor cried.

"Honey, he can't hurt you, I promise. He will never hurt you again, you got that. I will protect you," Susan said, letting the young girl rest against her shoulder.

Susan and Taylor stayed like that for about an hour when David called her out.

VVVV

Watching her hold that little girl, being there almost like a mother, let me find her soft spot. But while I'm thinking this, I realized how wrong this is. It's not right, not at all. How could someone with no siblings, no siblings, no child feel this strongly, and it is that moment when it hits me. This is it. This is the secret I have been searching for and before I know it, I am opening the door to get Susan.