I'd just like to thank the Second Geek for my new Canvas, and the rest of you for reviewing! I have such a good audience. Now on with the chapter!!

Famous Pirates. (one's you want to be avoiding.)

Let's do it in numbers . . .*Jack stop showing off* . . .She's just jealous because I can count! Anyway thanks to my reviewers, most of you wanted 'Famous Pirates', so I thought that's what I'd do. Tell me what ye think me matey's.

Top Ten Scary/Cool Pirate People.

10. Bartholomew Roberts – His nickname was Black Bart, and he was quite successful capturing over 400 ships in his life time (not quite as good as me, but he tried!). He was quite religious though, and drank tea instead of rum. . .he also forbade drinking and gambling. (as you can tell that is why he is number ten on my list!). He preferred to think of himself as a gentleman pirate, and thought he was better then the rest of us. . .hmmm. . .he wasn't so cool after all. . .but he did take over 50 million in gold!

He worked on a pirate ship, and was elected Captain when the former died. After a career stretching over thirty months he was killed by a single grapeshot. . .by another ponce called. . .erm. . .well I don't suppose it's important. But that's what happened.

The crew threw his body overboard, as he had asked and gave themselves in. 54 men were hung at the biggest execution ever (bet it wasn't as cool as my execution?!).

9. The Barbarossa Brothers (I'm NOT making this up. . .hmmm. . . wonder where Disney got the name Barbossa from?) *cough* anyway. . .they did some pretty cool stuff, but they are near the bottom of my list because of their name *shudder*.

8. Samuel Bellamy - He was originally a sailor, but his lust for gold was too much, (more then a sailor's wages anyway!!) So he took his family to America to engage in the popular sport of pirating! In other words attacking merchant ships, Spanish treasure ships, anything that floated really, and stealing everything he could get his hands on! Liking him yet?

He joined another pirate ship and became the Captain when the captain was *cough* conveniently disposed off. MUTINY! But he deserved it. . .he was too nice. . .or something along those lines.

After a three day chase they attacked a cargo ship from England, capturing hordes of treasure, ivory, sugar and indigo (I thought that was a colour!?)

Anyway after his long successful career he bumped into some rocks in the fog, his dear ship sank, and he drown along wit' most o' his crew. Or did he?

7. Francois L'Ollonais - Okay, his earlier life matters not. He went to Tortuga, where the crooked, pirate governor gave him a ship. Francois used his ship to attack the Spanish, earning himself a nickname of 'The flail of the Spaniards'. Remember the whole reputation = good thing? Well, this is a story o' how it backfired. People fought against him because they knew they were gonna die, so might as well die fighting, eh?

On some expa. . .expedition. . .or something. . .he was caught by Indians, torn apart and eaten. Well, at least he wasn't hung, right?

6. Henry 'Long Ben' Every - (that kinda rhymes if you say it after a couple o' bottles o' rum!) - I think one of the best things about Henry Every was when he offered to pay of the English national debt in exchange for a pardon (he was either bloody rich, or er. . .bloody drunk!)

5. Barbossa - Yeah right!! Erm. . .now the real number 5…

5. Mary Read – Ah, time for a girlie me thinks. . .*Mary Read will kill me for saying that. . .wait, she's dead. . .* Mary was the child of an affair with a pirate. Her mother dressed her up as a boy to continue receiving benefits, crafty, eh? And whilst serving as a cabin boy, she met her future husband (I reckon she revealed herself before they married, unless what a shock, eh?) After his death, she went back to her old tricks, and joined another crew. During an attack by Calico Jack she was caught and taken by him. She made friends with Anne Bonny (sweet, eh?) and died of fever in prison. . .A few seconds silence for a truly great woman, and a pirate!

4. Anne Bonny – It would be unfair to mention Read without Bonny, so here it goes. Just read the above but replace *Mary* with *Anne*, savvy? I mean they're all the same right?

3. 'Calico' Jack Rackham – Okay, okay. . .so I had to put him in somewhere! So he wasn't really a famous pirate!! More famous for all his women crewmembers. . .and for wearing calico I think! After a couple o' years o' good honest pirating he went and impregnated Anne Bonny (now come on, who HASN'T done that?!) she had his baby, which they then gave to some family in Cuba.

In later years, during an attack in Jamaica his whole crew was arrested. Most of them were pregnant, and quite a few were women, so got away without being hung. (remember that one!!) Calico Jack (cool name!!) was hung to try and stop other nasty pirates, in Deadman's Cay, near to Port Royal. (which is where I was going to be hung!). You know maybe I'll more famous after I am dead. . .

2. Blackbeard – (yes he existed!!) Now one reason this bloke was so successful, was he always prepared, which is something I've been drumming into your heads. He was always ready with armed pistols, daggers, and two cutlasses. He also had fourteen wives (but that is so not why I like him!), apparently weddings aboard his ship were frequent. And he was completely bonkers. He had himself and various crew members locked in the hold with a burning pot of brimstone to see who could withstand the fumes the longest. . .he won. Hey, I must try that. . .Annamaria? Gibbs? Anyone? They don't seem too enthusiastic!

But the reason I think he is one of the coolest pirates ever is after he lost his ship he returned to Bath Town sold his remaining ships, settled on land and bought a bonny wee house. Where he drove the neighbours mad by holding a week long party with a load of other pirates!! What a great idea! Annamaria? Gibbs? Oh, now they come running. . .

Anyway his life ended in a bloody battle, where he was killed by some ponce like Norrington, and his head displayed on the ship!

1. Captain Jack Sparrow – (woah, didn't see this one coming!) Okay, okay, so obviously I am the scariest, coolest pirate to ever walk the Caribbean. I am all the above combined. Except for the bad bits. And of course I have one added advantage over all of them, *smiles wickedly* I'm still alive.

WHAT HAVE WE LEARNT TODAY: -

ERM. . .THE TOP TEN PIRATES?

THAT BEING A WOMAN IS MUCH EASIER THEN BEING A BLOKE? NOPE? OH WELL. . .

Have you done something truly amazing? Better then my top ten? Do you deserve some recognition? (I sound like one of those car credit adverts, or insurance claim people. . .) then drop me a review and tell me what you have done during your pirating career. If you didn't get the hint, I'm asking you to review, savvy? Still didn't get the hint. . .I don't know what to say. . .you must be slower then Will Turner!