Chapter 18: Finally Some Answers

"Are you okay?" Henry asked Danielle. She seemed upset for some reason. She began to cry softly. Henry went to embrace her, but she pushed him away. He felt his heart sink. It seemed like they had just made a breakthrough and now they were back to square one. "What is it, what's wrong?" He was unable to hide the fear he felt.

"I'm so scared." Danielle whispered.

"What? Why? I thought you enjoyed our kiss."

"I did. I do. But I'm afraid that after tonight we may never kiss again." Danielle sat up. Henry feared she would run from him as she had so many times before. He took her hand in his and regretted it instantly, his mind going back to the infamous slapping incident. To his surprise however, Danielle did not seem to object so he held her soft hand in his.

"Please don't run from me again Danielle. I want to help you in any way I can." He tried his best to reassure her, to keep his voice calm and understanding. But inside he was frightened. "Please tell me what you're thinking, my love." Danielle cried harder. This would be the hardest thing she'd ever have to do. Ever. "Please tell me what frightens you."

"You're going to hate me." That was all she could manage to say before her voice was swallowed by sobbing. Henry felt his heart sink and suddenly he realized what she was building up to.

"I could never hate you, even if I tried." He let out a nervous giggle. He could feel himself start to cry as well, but he forced himself not to. That would, no doubt only make it that much harder on Danielle.

"You don't understand. I did something terrible, and because of me our future is ruined. Our dreams can never come true." The anguish written clearly on Danielle's face was killing Henry. Her whole face was already wet with tears. He wanted nothing more then to tell her that he already knew what happened, and it didn't bother him. They could move on, they had to move on or it would destroy him.

"Then we'll make new dreams, Danielle," He whispered instead.

"We can't!" Danielle screamed suddenly, much to Henry's surprise, "and it's all my fault!" Danielle felt all strength leave her body. She couldn't do this, she couldn't break his heart. She snatched her hand away from Henry and climbed off the haystack. Henry instantly climbed off as well. She only ran a few feet before stopping. She had no energy to run. Instead Henry could hear her loud pain filled sobbing. Again he had to force himself not to cry.

"Danielle, please, whatever it is that's hurting you, just tell me. I'm a strong man, I can handle it. We can handle anything if we work together, but please you have to tell me what's wrong." She turned around. Her breath was coming in sudden deep bursts as she tried to stabilize her emotions.

"Why are you doing this?" There was only eight feet between them, but even so her voice was so soft that Henry hardly heard her.

"Why am I doing what?" He was desperate to close the gap between them but feared that even taking one step closer would cause her to run again.

"Why are you being so wonderful?" She whimpered.

"Because I love you." Henry could feel his voice breaking and in his mind he silently begged Danielle to hurry up and get it over with.

"Don't you see, Henry? I tainted! I'm trash! I'm nothing!"

"Don't say that!"

"He raped me." Danielle said suddenly. She took a few deep breaths and pondered the words. It was the first time she had said them out loud, to herself or anyone else for that matter. She'd always known it, and she'd assumed that everyone around her knew as well, but to hear those words come out of her mouth was dreadful.

"I know." Henry replied, his voice almost a whisper.

"What did you say?" she couldn't have heard him right.

"I said I know." Henry felt as though he was floating. His feet hovering off the ground and he was looking down on somebody else's nightmare, but the tears that trickled down his cheek told him that this was a grim reality. He felt numb, his mind and heart on overload.

"How did you know?" Danielle asked, shock eminent in her voice.

"While we were sitting in your bedroom at Le Pieu's you seemed content to stare out the window at the scenery. I tried not to disturb you." Henry took a few steps towards Danielle involuntarily trying to close the gap between them, "I took that time to study your rather unusual bruises. The one's on your wrist stood out the most. After some time, I realized that they were finger marks. You had been held down, and considering I found you with Le Pieu in a locked room I figured him to be the culprit. For hours I tried to figure out why a man would hold down a woman, and why she would struggle so hard against him. I kept coming up with the same answer… I wanted to be wrong, oh god how I wished that I was wrong, but mother confirmed it."

"Your MOTHER knows?" Danielle asked, suddenly furious,

"It's okay Danielle, she understands…" Henry tried to explain before Danielle cut him short.

"Like hell she does!!"

"It's true Danielle it's true!! I understand, my mother understands, Louise, Paulette, Jacqueline, we all understand!! And what's more is that we love you and we want to help you! All you have to do sweetheart, is let us in! Let us love you!"

"I tried to fight, Henry. I really did, I swear it on my mother's grave."

"I know baby. I know you tried."

"I shouldn't have!!" Danielle bellowed in frustration.

"What do you mean you shouldn't have? I'm afraid you've lost me."

"Don't you see, the whole reason I ended up in that situation was because I tried to fight and I failed!! He cornered me…" Danielle began. She was overcome by the need to tell her story. She looked up at Henry and she knew he was more then willing to hear it. "He cornered me in the Armor room. It's a room where he keeps armor, swords and other pointy things. He wanted to kiss me but I wouldn't let him. I went for his dagger but he saw the motion and grabbed my wrist. I tried to pull away because he was hurting me and when I did, he let go and I fell and hit my head on the table. I was only unconscious for a few moments but that's all it took, I guess. When I woke up he was on top of me and I was practically naked. I fought him, Henry. I scratched, and I punched, I even spat in his eye, but it was no use. He was just too strong. The last thing I remember is watching the pillow crash over my face and realizing I couldn't breath. Then I woke up and I was a different person. I was bruised and bloody, and horrified!!" Danielle stopped and let a few sobs escape her throat, "I wasn't the person you fell in love with anymore, Henry. I didn't want you to be disappointed with me."

Henry was torn. Part of him wanted nothing more then to fully close the gap between them and hold her and cry for days. He finally had his answers, and now he wished he hadn't heard it. The other half of him was screaming to be strong, to let her keep talking, let her get it all out in the open.

"I'm so sorry," Was all he could manage to say.

"Don't be sorry for me, Henry. It's my fault. I did this to us, me!"

"How in the hell did you come to that conclusion?" Henry laughed at the absurdity of the logic.

"Don't you understand? Henry, you're a man, you deserve the simple pleasures any husband should get from his wife. I don't know if I can give you that. I can't promise you that one-day I'll feel comfortable enough to make love with you. Because of me I can never be your wife. Without any lovemaking there are no babies! You're the Crown Prince of France, one day you'll be King, and you have to make an heir." Danielle was both crying and shouting at the same time. Although she was upset, part of her realized that it felt good to get that burden off her chest.

"I don't care!!" Henry shouted feeling any sense of sanity slip away. "Don't you understand by now Danielle that none of that matters to me? We can go our entire lives never kissing or touching or even holding hands if that's what will make you feel safe with me. All I want is to wake up every day knowing that I'm in love with you, and you love me in return. That's all, Danielle. We don't have to make babies, we don't have to live in the palace, hell we can give Marguerite the throne if you want, none of that matters to me." Henry stopped to catch his breath unsure of how to continue, or if it was even necessary.

"You believe me?" Danielle cast her eyes downward, unable to watch Henry's reaction.

"Believe what?"

"That I didn't want any of this to happen." Henry was dumbfounded. Was she serious?

"Of course I believe you," Henry could handle the distant between them no longer. He walked over to her and stopped a mere foot or two away. He lifted her chin with his hand so that she was looking him straight in the eye, "you told me that this wasn't my fault, well guess what, it wasn't yours either. The only one that holds any blame is Le Pieu. I KNOW that to be a fact. And if the only thing I accomplish in my life is convincing you of that. Then I've had a great honor." Danielle lost all control of her emotions, and her tears prompted Henry to do the same. For a moment the two gazed into each other's eyes. This time it was Danielle who dissipated any remaining space between her and Henry. She wrapped her arms around him, and he fallowed her lead and hugged her firmly. Danielle became lost in the feel of him. It felt so good to feel safe, especially with him. Her Henry. She pulled away slightly and before she knew it their lips met in a soft kiss.

"Thank you." She whispered burying her nose into his chest. It started to rain. Big, clumsy drops of water stuck to their hair but neither noticed. For a while Henry tried to think of a response, but in the end he said nothing. There were no words that would do her justice.

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Henry realized that she was asleep when the muffled sound of snoring filtered to his ears. He smiled happily. She needed rest, and after tonight he did too, but he just couldn't pull himself away.

When the rain started they had come into her bedroom to finish their conversation. They'd laid down on her bed. Each of them laying on their sides so that they could see each other as they spoke. But soon after they did so, it became apparent to Henry that Danielle could hardly keep her eyes open, let alone hold a conversation. So he'd stopped talking. Instead he found tranquility in running his fingers through her hair and whispering soft 'I love you's' as she drifted off.

It had been a long day and Henry was tired. His body wanted to sleep, but his mind was more active then ever. Finally, he had all the pieces to the puzzle and the more he thought about it the angrier he became. There were so many whys and no answers. He knew what happened; he knew what Le Pieu did to her The worse part was that all the questions he still had were questions Danielle couldn't possibly answer. Such as: Why had Le Pieu done it? What drives a man to do such a thing? Henry thought long and hard and came to the conclusion that there was no way in hell a person could go through something that awful and not feel it for the rest of their lives.

Danielle herself even told him that she may never be the same again, that their dreams may never come true. No wonder she said that. She would have to live each day of the rest of her life in fear. Waiting, bracing, for the next attack. Henry rolled onto his back. He clenched and unclenched his first angrily. What a horrible way to live, he thought. Then he made a decision. He decided that the only way Danielle could ever truly move on with her life was if she had no reason to be afraid. If she never had to worry, then she'd be able to heal and they could move on and be happy. There was no way of getting around it, Henry decided. Pierre Le Pieu must die.