Title: After the Great Have Fallen
Summary: Post "A Whole in the World"-- Cordelia and Fred fight back.
Author: ShawThang
Spoilers: Pretty much everything up to and including "A Hole in the World".
Disclaimer: Angel: the series does not belong to me...although I wish it did.
Author's note: What's up with killing off the female leads? This is me rebelling against it.
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After the Great Have Fallen
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"Didn't think I'd see you again so soon."
Cordelia appeared in front of her, and Fred jerked back.
"Cordelia?" she whispered.
"That's me."
"W-what...Where am I?" she asked, gazing at the grey room she stood in.
"Beats me," Cordelia replied with a small shrug. "I've been here for ages now."
The room was small and plain, with no distinguishable features. There might have been a bench on the far side, but she wasn't sure. It all seemed surreal, as if she wasn't really here. And why was Cordelia standing in front of her? Cordelia had died a few weeks ago and last time she checked resurrecting the beautiful seer hadn't been on Wolfram and Hart's to-do list. She was glad to see her friend though, because she had missed Cordelia terribly. Caught up in a nostalgic moment she rushed to the seer's side and embraced her
Where Cordelia's neck should have been there was only thin air. She fell through empty space and stumbled forward. Gazing in horror at her friend, she began to back away.
"What are you?" she murmured, feeling her words roll off her tongue but reluctant to grasp their meaning. Not who, but what.
"I'm Cordelia," the other woman replied. "Well, technically, I was Cordelia."
Fred frowned and squinted, trying to understand. "Was?"
"I'm dead, remember?"
"Then why are you here?" she asked, still nervously rigid.
Cordelia sighed. "I've been since I died. Don't now why, and I still don't know where I am."
"Then why am I here?" Fred enquired, clasping her hands in front of her body.
A sympathetic expression crossed Cordelia's face, and she smiled sadly. "Don't you remember, Fred?"
"Remember? Remember what? Wes and me were sitting on my bed and... Oh God." Fred's eyes widened in panic. "I'm dead, aren't I?"
"Bit of a shock, huh?"
Fred stared at Cordelia in a numb daze. It all rushed back to her. The sarcophagus. The hospital room. Her boys. The pain. Then...nothing.
"Not really what I expected the afterlife to be," she joked, desperately trying to keep the tears at bay. At least she had Cordelia. The other woman would have been here alone, with no one to explain things.
"Same here," Cordelia said, sighing. "Others come, but they always leave after a while. No one ever stays. Except me, by the look of it."
Fred gazed at her, the panic and fear subsiding with every moment that passed. "I won't leave, Cordy."
Cordelia smiled then, and nodded gratefully.
"What do we do now?" Fred ventured, glancing over her shoulder.
"Now, we wait."
They didn't wait long. Soon after Fred arrived (she couldn't estimate how long- time seemed not to exist), they saw a part of the wall shudder and slide across, allowing them to see the newcomer.
"Angel?"
Angel shook his head slowly, and opened his mouth to speak. They knew the words were coming from his mouth, but they seemed to echo and reverberate off the walls. The sound filled them and swirled inside their minds, making it hard to concentrate. It wasn't Angel's voice, though. It was too rich and eerie to be heard outside this room.
"I am not the Angel you know. This is a shell so that you may see me. I have no true form."
"Typical," Cordelia muttered under her breath, then raised her voice. "Okay, Mr. No-True-Form. Where are we?"
"You are nowhere. This is a doorway, a place that separates the material world from the afterlife."
Fred had guessed as much. "So what are we doing here?"
"I do not know. That is why I am here. Why do you stay?"
"Stay?" Cordelia repeated in exasperation. "It's not like I want to stay here."
"Have you tried to leave?"
She sighed, placing her hands on her hips. "Of course I have-"
And she realized that she hadn't. Not once during her stay in the grey room had she actually tried to leave. She had never followed the others through the sliding door, had never questioned why she didn't.
"No," she whispered.
"Why?" Angel had become Spike.
Whoever or whatever was using Spike as a shell seemed truly curious.
"I-I..." she faltered. Why hadn't she? Because she didn't want to? Because she liked this room? Because she wanted to go back?
"I'm not finished," she said, surprised at the truth in her words.
She wasn't finished. There was still so much she could do, so much she could give to the world. There was still so much it could give her. Angel needed her; needed his link to the Powers, but also needed his best friend. There was still life in her yet, and she didn't want to pass through that door.
Spike cocked his head to the side, considering her words. Then he glanced at Fred. "And you? Why do you not pass through the doors?"
Fred didn't know why, either. It just seemed logical to remain with Cordelia. She hadn't even contemplated leaving her friend, no matter what awaited her on the other side of the door. She thought about what her life had been, what it was, and what it could be. It was too important to give up for whatever waited beyond this room.
"Because I belong here," she finally answered. "With Cordelia. With my friends."
Spike became Wesley, but the voice remained the same.
"You belong with him?" It wasn't a statement, but a question, and Fred nodded, feeling the now familiar warmth rush through her at the sight of his face.
"I do."
Wesley became Lorne. "No one has ever chosen not to pass through the door before."
"That's us," Cordelia said with a forced laugh. "Never one to follow the crowd."
"It is unheard of," he continued, drawing out his sentence and making it slow, steady, controlled.
"So is a cheerleader turned seer turned evil mom turned coma patient. And a taco lovin' librarian turned cow turned scientist."
"You speak true. I do not know what to make of this."
"Uh," Fred interrupted, raising her hand. "What do you mean?"
"You cannot remain here forever." It had become Gunn. "This is the passage between the worlds. Most who come here cannot resist the lure of rest and peace, but neither of you have felt it. I do not understand."
"Neither do we," Fred murmured, wondering why the notion of Heaven or whatever the afterlife was did not call to her.
"I cannot influence you, one way or the other," Gunn said. "Contrary to popular belief, I watch and learn. I do not interfere. This is the way is has been and always will be. I can only say that you cannot remain here. Choose, and I will see you again one day."
Cordelia tapped her nails against her leg. Fred bit her lip.
They both realized at the same time.
I will see you again one day.
They had already chosen.
Angel appeared in front of them, smiling. "Time to come home."
Cordelia and Fred glanced at each other, clasped hands and walked away.
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Finito
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