A/N: Tristan comes back after Military School. He's on a mission. Goal: to get the girl. Only the girl has recently had her heart broken by the biggest player in school. Her feelings considering Tristan. Songfic.
I'm here just like I said
Though its breaking every rule I've ever made
My racing heart is just the same
Why make it strong to break it once again?
And I'd love to say I do
Give everything to you
But I can never now be true
So I say...
When he asked me to come here I wondered why. It's not like we were friends in highschool or something. We barely even talked, if you don't count the banterings that is. I remembered how I felt when he left. It was almost like I had a secret crush on him, but at that time I was with Dean and I couldn't act upon it.
And now...after what happened with Sebastian I never want to date again. God, I wish I had known what an asshole he really is. He's such a player. And I still love him. When I see him walking around the school my heart still beats faster. When he looks at me with those gorgeous eyes I melt.
When Tristan told me that he couldn's stop thinking about me in Military school I could just hear Sebastian's voice saying the same things. That he had missed me over summer. That all he wanted was one date. Just one date. His soft voice and honest eyes soon had me captured. I should have known it was a lie. And now I heard Tristan, with the same voice and the same honest eyes. Repeating the same words, the same lies. I soon got tired and interrupted him.
I think I'd better leave right now
Before I fall any deeper
I think I'd better leave right now
Feeling weaker and weaker
Somebody better show me how
Before I fall any deeper
I think I'd better leave right now
I wish I wouldn't fall for those tactics but I can't help being naive. Hoping that there's some sincerity in his words. Hoping that this time it's different. He's different. I wonder if Military School changed him. If he changed from a player to a nice normal guy or if this is just the same old game. I wonder if he has really thought about me and in what way. If he wanted to see me or if he wanted to sleep with me.
I wonder so many things and I can't help being scared and miserable. I'm so tired of being pushed around and played by rich goodlooking guys. I wish I was ugly. So that way guys wouldn't want to have me like I am some trophy. I just wish someone was interested in me for me.
I'm here so please explain
Why you're opening up a healing wound again
I'm a little more careful
Perhaps it shows
But if I lose the highs, at least I'm spared the lows
Now I tremble in your arms
What could be the harm
To feel my spirit calm
He held me. Suddenly his arms were around me and he was trying to persuade me to believe him. It felt so good to be held. It reminded me of the way Sebastian used to hold me when we weren't in public. He used to be so nice then. It was probably just because I didn't like him so much when he was being an asshole. He was like that whenever we were in public. He would kiss me passionately and slam me into a locker to prove to other people that he hadn't changed. I just wish I would have seen that sooner. That that was his real side. Not the side that he showed to me. He proved that when I found him kissing another girl during a party. When I felt tears stinging in my eyes he just laughed at me and called me a prude. I was humiliated in front of the whole school. Everybody got to hear how he never even got to second base and how frustrating I was. He wondered out loud if maybe I wasn't a lesbian cause god knows it couldn't have been his fault.
I wouldn't know how to say
How good it feels seeing you today
I see you've got your smile back
Like you say you're right on track
But you may never know why
Once bitten twice is shy
If I'm proud perhaps I should explain
I couldn't bear to lose you again
When I listened to him talking about how Military School changed him I saw a real smile on his face. A smile the old Tristan would never have smiled in public. It made me feel like I was part of some practical joke, and part of me hated it that Sebastian had taken away my innocence and naiveté. I wanted to believe him, and I smiled back when he said that he was happy. For one second I believed he was being sincere, until he shot me that look again and told me how he would be even happier when I agreed to go out on a date with him. I lowered my eyes and bit my lip. I lost him once, even if I didn't really have him in the beginning. I remembered how much it had hurt when he left, and I knew how much it hurt when he would play me and leave again. So I shied away. I hid my face behind my hair and told him no. I wish I could explain what happened to me while he had been gone but I figured he would find out soon enough. I didn't stay to see that puppylook on his face. I had seen that one too many times. I was not going to be played again. Not this time. Even if it meant passing the chance at something good. But knowing Tristan, he wasn't going to let me.
Review please!
A/N: Should I make this into a story?
I'm here just like I said
Though its breaking every rule I've ever made
My racing heart is just the same
Why make it strong to break it once again?
And I'd love to say I do
Give everything to you
But I can never now be true
So I say...
When he asked me to come here I wondered why. It's not like we were friends in highschool or something. We barely even talked, if you don't count the banterings that is. I remembered how I felt when he left. It was almost like I had a secret crush on him, but at that time I was with Dean and I couldn't act upon it.
And now...after what happened with Sebastian I never want to date again. God, I wish I had known what an asshole he really is. He's such a player. And I still love him. When I see him walking around the school my heart still beats faster. When he looks at me with those gorgeous eyes I melt.
When Tristan told me that he couldn's stop thinking about me in Military school I could just hear Sebastian's voice saying the same things. That he had missed me over summer. That all he wanted was one date. Just one date. His soft voice and honest eyes soon had me captured. I should have known it was a lie. And now I heard Tristan, with the same voice and the same honest eyes. Repeating the same words, the same lies. I soon got tired and interrupted him.
I think I'd better leave right now
Before I fall any deeper
I think I'd better leave right now
Feeling weaker and weaker
Somebody better show me how
Before I fall any deeper
I think I'd better leave right now
I wish I wouldn't fall for those tactics but I can't help being naive. Hoping that there's some sincerity in his words. Hoping that this time it's different. He's different. I wonder if Military School changed him. If he changed from a player to a nice normal guy or if this is just the same old game. I wonder if he has really thought about me and in what way. If he wanted to see me or if he wanted to sleep with me.
I wonder so many things and I can't help being scared and miserable. I'm so tired of being pushed around and played by rich goodlooking guys. I wish I was ugly. So that way guys wouldn't want to have me like I am some trophy. I just wish someone was interested in me for me.
I'm here so please explain
Why you're opening up a healing wound again
I'm a little more careful
Perhaps it shows
But if I lose the highs, at least I'm spared the lows
Now I tremble in your arms
What could be the harm
To feel my spirit calm
He held me. Suddenly his arms were around me and he was trying to persuade me to believe him. It felt so good to be held. It reminded me of the way Sebastian used to hold me when we weren't in public. He used to be so nice then. It was probably just because I didn't like him so much when he was being an asshole. He was like that whenever we were in public. He would kiss me passionately and slam me into a locker to prove to other people that he hadn't changed. I just wish I would have seen that sooner. That that was his real side. Not the side that he showed to me. He proved that when I found him kissing another girl during a party. When I felt tears stinging in my eyes he just laughed at me and called me a prude. I was humiliated in front of the whole school. Everybody got to hear how he never even got to second base and how frustrating I was. He wondered out loud if maybe I wasn't a lesbian cause god knows it couldn't have been his fault.
I wouldn't know how to say
How good it feels seeing you today
I see you've got your smile back
Like you say you're right on track
But you may never know why
Once bitten twice is shy
If I'm proud perhaps I should explain
I couldn't bear to lose you again
When I listened to him talking about how Military School changed him I saw a real smile on his face. A smile the old Tristan would never have smiled in public. It made me feel like I was part of some practical joke, and part of me hated it that Sebastian had taken away my innocence and naiveté. I wanted to believe him, and I smiled back when he said that he was happy. For one second I believed he was being sincere, until he shot me that look again and told me how he would be even happier when I agreed to go out on a date with him. I lowered my eyes and bit my lip. I lost him once, even if I didn't really have him in the beginning. I remembered how much it had hurt when he left, and I knew how much it hurt when he would play me and leave again. So I shied away. I hid my face behind my hair and told him no. I wish I could explain what happened to me while he had been gone but I figured he would find out soon enough. I didn't stay to see that puppylook on his face. I had seen that one too many times. I was not going to be played again. Not this time. Even if it meant passing the chance at something good. But knowing Tristan, he wasn't going to let me.
Review please!
A/N: Should I make this into a story?