Disclaimer: Characters are not mine... but the rest of the story is!
Rating: I think it'll be PG, now and in the future...
Summary: Imagine for a moment that Syd and Vaughn are keeping normal lives (as mine, as yours...) but they're still made the one for the other... How thing would be between them? How did they build their story?... It's an experiment I started months ago, with our beloved characters, although the story isn't much 'Alias'.Eveything built using Evanescence's 'Bring me to life' as leif-motiv!
Genre: Syd's POV. Romance... tons of romance... It's an experiment I don't know where can reach!
Hope you'll forgive my mistakes with English (any feedback to improve also this aspect will be more than welcomed).
BRING ME TO LIFE
I was lost. Well, I was not so lost but that's how I felt myself every minute. My life had come into an spiral of severe pain, after discovering that there's no worth in giving every bit of my whole life to a man, to someone who cheated over my feelings, turning them from joy and happiness into the most incredible desperation...
Yes, I know that this is a well-known story. I'm not the one, I'm not the first - and unfortunately not the last - in diving into the mists of pain because of love so much that your world seems to be ruined for good.
I don't know how long my state was so, but I still ignore how my life went upside-down from one minute to another. A coffee in a restaurant, near the place where I work, used to do me good -and it still does-. A black long coffee, sitting at the most hidden table, alone with my self-pity, thinking about the gone times... thinking about him...
Noise, people chatting about nothing more important than my sadness, in groups... and I was alone. My entire life seemed to have become an island between a sea of loud people. But I felt comfortable... so comfortable to think about trusting anyone... so comfortable to go on with my life, to keep my uses and my friends... All I wanted to do was being alone.
"Excuse me...", a kind man's voice put me out of my dark thoughts, "Would you mind if I take the newspaper?...mmm... just in case you've finished with it..."
I looked who was talking to me, invaded my quiet self-built space of loneliness. He seemed embarrased, as if he noticed he might have done something wrong in disrrupting my thoughts.
"Yes... of course...", I answered politely, there was no point in looking angry, "Yes, take it, I've just finished with the crossword". I caught myself making a non-related commentary to a perfect unknown person without apparent reason.
"Thanks.", he whispered. And he headed for a table situated near mine, glancing me in an almost furtive way as he left me.
I felt strange. I wouldn't be able to explain why I felt so, but that's what happened. I tried - useless try - to recover the line of my darkness, making an effort to center myself in my favourite hobby: recovering my most painful memories of the recent times... But soon I discovered I was unintendedly glancing to his table. The shy man was a handsome attractive one, undoubtedly. It would have been impossible for anyone not to realize the fact. And he called my attention, breaking my routine of centering only in my most immediate universe, that's it: my table, my coffee and my thoughts. I observed him carefully... Short fair hair, a bit spiky as if he had just got up in the morning. Green eyes, concentrated as they moved along the lines of the paper... Carefully drawn cheeks, and an almost unnoticed beard covering his chin as museline. Definitely gorgeous... And I immediatly categorized him into the category of men who were likely to wake my hate up. Beautiful kind men who play with every atom of yourself till they head for another objectiv to destroy.
Absorted in my mind as I was, I hardly realized the key strange moment in which our eyes met. My eyes went down for some seconds... That's the way men like him catch their victims - I thought. Slowly I looked again to get surprised by the fact that he was still looking at me too. I felt naked. I saw something in his look that made me think he was not looking at me, but directly deep to my feelings. He smiled, a smile full of understanding seemed to me.
How can you see into my eyes like open doors
leading you down into my core
where I've become so numb...
The words of a song went across my head, telling me exactly what I'd seen in that look of him. Stupid... You're going crazy! - I told to myself. Too much time having that day's coffee, better if I went back home.
So did I. I stood up, picked my jacket and went for the door, fast, trying to erase the rush of understanding he'd just sent to me... Being about to go out of the place, I noticed a warm firm hand catching my arm.
"Hey... wait!", said his voice, "You forget your paper!"
"You... you can keep it if you want...", I turned to face him without arising my shy look, "I... I don't need it anymore"
"Is everything O.K.?", he insisted, "Hope I didn't annoy you"
"No, don't worry. Everything's well", I looked at him, only to meet his flashing bright green eyes saying me good-bye, "Bye!"
"Thanks again... See you"
I exited, trying to breath deep the fresh air of November. What was happening to me? Oh God... I was great in my island-alike existence, and suddenly something had changed the places. I couldn't understand... If I had known what would happen, probably I'd have run to the emptiest place in earth...
Still shocked, I arrived at home where I realized that I had finally taken my newspaper from those unknown but warm hands. I was about to throw it away, to free myself from the arisen agitation, when I saw something in the cover. Written in a beautiful right masculine writing, I gasped when I read 'How can such a beautiful face express such a deep pain and such a desperate loneliness? -MV-'
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