Day 285
He is giving it another try.
It's like cauterising a wound, like putting a hand into the flame, even when one has been burned once, but he'll do it anyway.
He'll do it because he wants to know if what he's seen is right.
He'll do it because, at last, he thinks there might be a possibility that he was wrong.
It doesn't make it any easier.
This time Vash lets him use his cane, but remains close to him as they walk through the town, his eyes are trained on Knives' every move.
Their reasons for coming outside are not only ideological, but practical too for Knives needs a hair cut.
His white-blond locks are nearly touching his shoulders now, Vash has offered to cut them for him but he declined.
'I am not allowing you to come anywhere near me with a sharp object,' he had said, and he knows that it must have taken much willpower for Vash not to make a cutting remark of his own right then.
He said he would do it himself, he did a pretty good job of it last time after all, but Vash has insisted that they go to a proper barbers shop this time.
Again Knives is less than happy, he dislikes the idea of allowing a human, any human, to be allowed so close to his person, to perform such an… intimate procedure. To cut pieces off him, as it were, even if those bits are just dead hair cells. All his life Knives has cut his own hair, and done a fine job of it, he cannot entirely comprehend why his brother wishes him to change these habits.
Still, if it is what Vash demands…
They reach the barbers shop soon enough, Knives quickly taking a seat and proceeding to sulk horrendously. His brother starts to talk to the barber, paying him the correct amount of money and detailing the style desired.
Knives listens closely to what his being said, for if Vash is attempting to give him a hair style like his own then he will regret the day he was born.
As it is Vash instructs the barber to give Knives the same style he has always had, short and drawn back.
He is guided to the barbers chair and forced to sit down, a towel is placed around his neck and shoulders, and his hair is dampened, ready to be cut.
It takes every ounce of concentration, every iota of self control he has not to leap out of the chair in panic as the human barber comes towards him with his scissors in hand, gleaming in the harsh sunlight.
He moves behind him, and Knives closes his eyes and tightens his grip on the chair arms, he half expects to feel to cold edge of a razor blade slit his throat at any moment.
'Sir,' the smooth tones of the human barber resounds with mild irritation, 'if you could please stop shaking…'
Taking a deep breath, Knives tries to control the involuntary movements of his head as, by reflex, he strains away from the scissors.
A few moments later there is a snipping sound as the barber begins his work. White-gold locks of Knives' hair falls around him.
_You're being very brave, Knives_ says Vash's voice in his head.
Knives scowls and shoots an evil look Vash's way, telling him exactly where to put his patronising tone.
Despite his status as a creature which lives outside of time, the next few hours seem as years as the barber continues his work, the scissors snipping unseen, cutting away locks of Knives' hair. At one point, when he was trimming his fringe, Knives nearly bit through his lip in concentration as the blades shone and twirled before his eyes. The final few snips, where it seems to him that the barber can be cutting off no more than cells from the tip of his follicles, are almost unendurable.
Eventually, however, the job seems to be done. The barber brings him a mirror and presents to him his work, asking if it is satisfactory.
From Knives' point of view he couldn't care less if he came out bald, so long as he can escape that dreadful chair and those hard, gleaming scissors.
'See,' says Vash as he escapes the seat, 'that wasn't so bad, was it?'
Knives merely grunts, glad that it is over with.
Then he watches, horrified as his brother takes his place in the barbers chair.
'I'm gonna get my hair done too, you know,' he laughs, 'you just sit tight, Knives, then we'll be off home.'
Sighing, Knives concedes and sits in the waiting room chair Vash previously inhabited, his eyes stray towards the window of the barbers shop where the busy life of the town passes by.
It reminds him of the video screens on the SEEDS ship, watching clips of times long past, observing actors put on a play for his amusement.
They're like ants, he thinks, scurrying past absorbed in their own petty lives, with nothing to look forward to except inevitable death, but struggling on anyway, struggling on for an Eden they may never reach. And even if they did, they would certainly destroy it.
They must know this, surely, they must. So why did they keep on struggling?
The window is open to let air in, and even as he sits there pondering a cool breeze enters the stuffy shop, rustling his newly trimmed hair. The feeling of wind on his skin again, of being outside and alone, it brings him back to who he was, who he is. He feels as he did before Vash shot him, when he had been himself.
It feels good and yet… strangely disturbing.
As he watches three children run across the street, he finds that he recognises them, he knows their faces. They are the same three that tried to tempt him out of his room all those months ago, their names escape him but their forms are familiar enough.
As he watches a disagreement forms between them, the dark haired child and one of the red heads seem to be talking animatedly with the other red head, who is screaming something back at then. It's hard to tell, but Knives thinks it's the female. One of them, the dark haired boy, pushes the other female, and, with another shrill scream, the girl falls down onto the dirt road. The two boys run off, leaving the red head girl crying in the dust.
Knives stands up and moves towards the door, he feels Vash's eyes boring into the back of his head as he does so.
'I'm not going to go far,' he says, 'I promise.'
'Alright,' replies Vash, though his voice is heavy with suspicion, even without looking round Knives can tell that he's tensed up in the barbers chair, ready to leap into action should he do anything inappropriate.
So, opening the door, Knives steps out into the dusty street and without entirely knowing why, he moves towards the crying child.
He feels no pity for her, or any real compassion merely… curiosity, he wishes to know what the disagreement was about. One can tell a lot about a pest by the behaviour of its offspring, he thinks.
As his shadow blocks the sunlight surrounding her, the girl looks up at him and gawps.
'Hello,' he says, trying to sound friendly. He's not entirely sure he succeeds,
''Lo,' she replies and starts to wipe the tears away from her eyes quickly, as if embarrassed by them.
'What's wrong?' enquires Knives.
The girl sniffs again, 'they won't let me play with them!'
'Your friends?'
'Yeah, Paul and my brother, Roberto. They say I can't play with them 'cos I'm a girl.'
Knives nods to himself, he recalls the names now. This is the usual story of prejudice, told time and time again. The humans couldn't even get on with each other, strived within their very genders for equality, what chance did a Plant have?
'I hate them!' continues the girl.
He blinks at these words, they sound strange coming from a small child.
'Really?' he asks.
'Yeah, I hate them! They're cruel and horrible and I never want to talk to them again! I hope… I hope… I hope they all drop dead!' and with this she starts to cry again, deep sobs which send hot, angry tears sliding down her cheek.
For one irrational moment he is tempted to touch the girl, to place a comforting hand upon her arm, but he shakes the impulse away. She is a spider, after all and no comfort would do any good; it would merely soften her up and make later revelations all the more painful. She is too young to understand the truth of the human condition; it is best she learn hate now and have a better chance of surviving amongst the evil of her own kind.
Even as he stands back and watches her cry, he feels a presence behind him and knows that it is his brother.
Vash moves round him and comes to sit down next to the sobbing girl; he mutters sweet words into her ear and tells her it's alright.
Knives watches with a kind of horrified curiosity as he makes her laugh, comforts her and tells her other lies. He says that she shouldn't blame her brother, that they should talk it out, should be nice to each other, lies, Knives thinks, all lies.
When it is over she runs back off to play with the two boys and Vash goes with her, explains matters to the boys, plays with them until, at last, the three children are together again, tumbling innocently in the dust.
Knives feels sick.
…………………………………………………………………………………………..
Gotta say, I'm actually rather pleased with this chapter, I think it worked out well… which probably means its utter Cr**, but there you go.
Readers Replies:
TheoldFart: Thank you, I'm happy that I've got to many new readers here! Yes, I'm sick of seeing OC romantic interests. Romance rarely interests me anyway, and I do honestly think that friendship is just as important and just as vital. Please keep reviewing!
Ron the Future Weasel: Tipsy Knives is a funny image, I'd like to see him absolutely smashed in a fic one day, that'd be funny. Vash has managed a lot, really, without his input Knives would not have only killed Pete on sight (more than likely) but would probably have escaped any how (the door was open, after all.) Pete is an important second step to Knives… change, but the first step, which Vash laid down in earlier chapters, was equally important. Torturing Vash is fun and not to OC, after all much of Trigun cannon is about 'how can we make Vash suffer as much as possible?' Gotta love that attitude! I'm looking forward to reading your reviews. Thanks for the smiling kitty, my cat likes to sit on my lap too when I'm on the computer, it just can't stand me taking interest in anything else other than it. Silly kitty! I hope you liked this chapter too!
Angelstrike: I did try to make him fairly real. He's a bit of a characature, really, but I don't think he's *too* bad. Good one for spotting the Pete/Steve thing, remember it, it might come in later… (hint, hint!) From what I can gather a Gary Stu is just the male version of a Mary Sue, I think that's all there is too it. Good thing Vash sent Knives to an expert barber, eh? I must admit, though, I was tempted to make him have a hair cut like Vash's, just for cheep laughs. I didn't though. See, Knives, I don't hate you ALL that much! (: Don't' worry though, there'll be other things to drive Knives over the edge… hehehe… Oh, and hurry up with your next chapter, damn it!
Aoi: Yeah, I made Pete's dialect slightly different so that he sounded more… earthy and realistic. If this was an actual anime, I picture him having the same type dialect as Wolfwood, a definite accent. Yeah, Knives is pretty much better now. Not that he's top of his form, but he's OK. I like your description of his hair cut as fuzzy, it is kinda fuzzy now you mention it.
Ana: Oooh, another new reviewer! Hello! :hug: Oooh, how I do love reviews! Heh, happy I hooked you, I had wondered how 'hookable' this fic was, given it's style, but it seems to have attracted some regular readers. BTW, a tip, no review is ever an annoying review unless it's full of useless flaming and swear words. I appreciate and love every review given out to me, it helps me write better in the future, for one thing. So thanks for your kind words, I honestly appreciate them, please keep reviewing!
SanoGirl: And ANOTHER! WOW! I'm on a roll here! Head… getting… to… big… to… fit…in… house! No, seriously, that is some of the nicest things anyone has ever said yet! Thank you! This seems to be the kind of fic that niggles on people until, out of sheer frustration, they are forced to read it, and then they love it! Great! And gods, I'm on another favourites list, I feel so proud :sniff: please, please keep reviewing though! Let me keep that warm, fuzzy feeling! Thanks! Oh, and I liked your Trigun fic, it was very nice. Also, if you like Gravitation (as I see from your summery) and don't mind Ryichui, check out Pianissimo Butterfly in the Gravitation fic section. It's rated R and is still being updated but it's fantastic! One of the best fics I've EVER read. And that goes for all of you, if you like Gravitation, check it out!
AnonymousTrigunOtaku: Thanks, I'll try to keep it up!
TheDreamsoftheDead: Hey, I almost missed you, you know. But you're getting a reply now! Thanks for the awesome praise. Good English, at least on a basic level, is vital for good fiction. I'm not perfect, far from it, but I do my best to at least abide by the basics of grammar and spelling. I think my descriptive sentences and my dialogue could use work but hey, I'm improving all the time. Don't worry, I'll be writing for a long, long time to come. I couldn't imagine a time when I won't write, I love it too much. I hope this chapter lives up to your praise, any how.
NEXT TIME: Finally, at last, Knives make his escape! 'Nuff said.