Dancing with a Werewolf
A/N: ok, I'm pissed. ff.net took off my fanfic "Spicyness" I didn't know they could do that! I'm still new to this site! But since I'm pissed, I shall express my emotions through my writing like I always do.
Chapter Ten - Pain
-Remus P.O.V.-
He had been watching her all week and he had never known he was capable of feeling so much guilt. She was as pale as he was, and she also wasn't eating as much. Remus noticed that this gave her a weak, sickly look.
Usually, the day of his transformation, he'd be in the hospital wing, or resting elsewhere. But she was attending classes, and Remus wanted to watch over her. (A/N: yeah, right. We all know that Remus is sweet and everything, but come on, he's a guy - this is all about dominance and being the strongest werewolf - lol)
He soon wished that he had gone to the hospital wing, though, because as soon as he stepped into Transfiguration his pains started up ten times worse. He took a long, shaky breath and went to sit in his seat, which was, fortunately for him, directly behind Rozlyn's.
From where he sat, she seemed to be having and even worse time of it than he was. She was hunched over and was gripping the table in front of her so hard that her knuckles turned twenty times whiter than his parchment. And with his excellent hearing, he could hear her slow, shuddering gasps as she struggled to breathe.
Remus watched her, confused. 'How come she won't go to the hospital wing?' he thought. Staying in class was torture for him, and as she was a first time werewolf, he knew it must have been agony for her.
Finally, (after watching her do this for the millionth time) he stood up in the middle of McGonagall's lesson. "Professor, may I please escort Rozlyn to the hospital wing?" His face turned bright red as everyone turned to stare at him (except Rozlyn - she was still trying to breathe) including Professor McGonagall.
"Mr. Lupin, what - ?" McGonagall started, but Rozlyn interrupted her.
"No," she said. "I don't want to go."
Now everyone's attention was turned to her, Remus' included. "Why the devil not?" he asked. "You're sick. You should go see Madam - "
"I said, no!" she repeated, without turning around.
"But you're sick," Remus argued. "Professor, doesn't she look sick to you?"
Professor McGonagall looked at Rozlyn closely. "As a matter of fact, Ms. Jenkins, you do look rather - "
"NO!" Rozlyn yelled. She stood up and turned on Remus, her eyes flashing angrily. "Can't you take 'no' for an answer!? Dammit Lupin, leave me alone!"
Remus sat down hard, his face burning in humiliation and shame. He stared down at the table in front of him, wishing he could disapparate.
-Rozlyn P.O.V.-
She was faintly aware of a buzzing sound, then she realized that the whole class was silent, save for the bees they were supposed to be transfiguring into quills that day. (A/N: gross!)
She sat down quickly, but not before catching a glimpse of Remus' face. She suddenly got a horrible sinking feeling. 'Oh, Merlin, what have I done?' she thought.
-Remus P.O.V.-
He had never wanted class to end so badly. At the bell he was out of the door so fast that he failed to hear the homework assignment.
He ran straight for the hospital wing. So much for trying to be a hero.
-Rozlyn P.O.V.-
"Ms. Jenkins?" Rozlyn was almost at the door when she heard Professor McGonagall call her name. The burning feeling came back to her face.
She stopped and turned slowly. McGonagall's expression was strange - it was stern, yet sad at the same time. Rozlyn walked up to her desk, tentatively.
"Yes, Professor?"
"Ms. Jenkins, that was simply uncalled for," Professor McGonagall started. "However, as I am aware of your condition. I will let it go. You deserve a detention, but I daresay your transformation will be painful enough, so instead I'll be forced to take twenty points from Gryffindor, and I do believe that you owe Mr. Lupin an apology - a very sincere and profound apology."
Rozlyn nodded, keeping her eyes glued to the floor. "Yes, Ma'am," she whispered. Quickly, she turned and sprinted for the door.
She started to go for the common room, but stopped. Remus' scent had gone cold. 'He probably went to the hospital wing,' she thought, her face reddening.
"Rozlyn," Lily's voice came out of nowhere. Rozlyn looked up in surprise. Lily smiled hesitantly. "Um, first I just wanted to say, 'wow.' Second, I just wanted to say, 'wow.'"
Rozlyn blushed. "I didn't mean to yell at him," she mumbled.
"Well, you did!" Lily said, looking stunned.
"Too right you did!" the angry voice of James said from behind them.
The girls spun around to see that Sirius was with him, and they were both glaring furiously. Rozlyn shivered. They looked a little . . . murderous.
"Leave her alone!" Lily said, putting her hands on her hips.
"Stay out of it, Evans!" James retorted. "This has nothing to do with you."
"Nor with you!" Lily snapped.
Rozlyn sighed. "No, Lily. He's right. It really is none of your business."
Lily turned around and stared at her. "What?"
Rozlyn swallowed nervously. "Listen, Lily, maybe this isn't the time . . ."
No one spoke for a moment, then Lily said, "Fine, if that's how you want it. You know, Rozlyn, you've been acting weird all week, and now you have a secret with them and not me? I thought I was your friend!"
Rozlyn shook her head. "No, it's not like that, but . . . I can't tell you."
"Why not!? You obviously trust them with your secret!" Lily exclaimed angrily.
Rozlyn felt like crying. "You don't understand - "
"Now that you mention it, you're right, Jenkins. There are a lot of things I don't understand about you. I call you my friend, and yet, we've been sharing a dorm for five years, and I know absolutely nothing about you!"
"Lily, please - "
"No, I don't think I want to listen now!" Lily interrupted. She stalked off, throwing back a poisonous look to Sirius who'd been standing in her way.
Rozlyn didn't know how to react. Neither did James and Sirius, she noticed. She sighed. "I'm going to the hospital wing. Remus is there. Come on, if you're coming," she said in a perfectly flat voice.
They didn't say a word as she led them to the hospital wing. The only way she could tell they were there was because she could hear two separate heartbeats, and the blood rushing through their bodies. Her own heartbeat quickened and her face grew slightly red as she realized that all these heightened senses made her feel somewhat . . . sexually aroused. She wondered if Remus ever felt this way.
'No, Rozlyn! Stop it!' she told herself, blushing furiously. She took a deep breath and stepped into the hospital wing.
"Madam Pomphrey's not here," she said softly.
"Is Remus?" Sirius asked. She nodded, without looking back.
"He's behind that curtain," she pointed, then sat down on a bed.
-Remus P.O.V.-
Remus' eyes were closed, but he wasn't asleep. He just wasn't up to talking to anyone at the moment. 'Can't you take 'no' for an answer!? Dammit Lupin, leave me alone!' The words rang in his head over and over.
He turned over, willing himself not to cry. Now, she really did hate him.
~_~
"Remus!" James' voice hissed.
Remus knew they were coming. He had just hoped that for once, his stupid wolf senses were wrong. He kept his eyes closed wishing James and Sirius would go away.
"Remus!" Sirius echoed. "Wake up! Come on, mate!"
Remus sighed and opened his eyes sleepily. He stared at them with his perfect wolf vision.
"Jeez, you're like the sleeping dead," James muttered.
"What do you want?" Remus said, quietly. He had just picked up Rozlyn's scent, and it was making him feel worse.
James and Sirius exchanged a look. "Just wanted to check on you," James said, lowering his voice. "You're okay, right?"
Remus closed his eyes again. "I'm fine," he mumbled. "Just fine."
"Well, if you're sure, then," Sirius said. "Bye."
"Bye," James repeated. Remus didn't open his eyes again until they were both gone.
-Rozlyn P.O.V.-
She sat on her bed and stared at Remus' curtain. She had to do apologize soon. There was really no use in delaying it. And she had to do it before Madam Pomphrey returned, but every time she closed her eyes, she kept seeing that hurt look on his face.
She took a deep breath. 'This was Remus Lupin, remember?' she told herself. 'This is the guy you've had a crush on since first year when he helped you carry your books. This is sweet, sensitive Remus Lupin.'
She stood up and pulled back his curtain to find him awake and staring at her. Her first instinct was to back away, but she shook her head and went closer to him. He didn't say a word.
"Remus?" she whispered. Her heart was pounding like crazy. She knew he could hear it. 'Wait? Is that mine? Or his?'
He didn't answer her, but he didn't look away either.
"Remus, I'm sorry," she said. "I really am. It's just . . . the pain was getting to me, and you're right, I should've come here, but . . . I'm - I just - " She stopped and looked away. "Never mind. I'll just leave you alone."
She turned around and started to go, but then she heard him get up. And then, he was suddenly behind her with his hand gently placed on her shoulder. "No, Rozlyn," he said quietly. "Tell me. What is it?"
She turned around, and caught her breath. Did he know what he did to her? Did he realize how her heartbeat speeded up whenever she was around him? 'Probably,' she answered herself.
"I-I don't w-want to believe it," she stammered. "I thought m-maybe if I ig- ignored it, it might g-go away."
He gazed into her eyes. Rozlyn felt like he was staring past her eyes, right into her aching soul. 'Does he know what he does to me?' she asked herself, again.
"But it won't, will it?" she said it so low, she could barely hear herself. He shook his head. She could see her own pain reflected in his eyes. Or was that his?
-Remus P.O.V.-
Remus didn't know what he was doing anymore. He brought one hand up slowly and touched the side of her face. His heartbeat accelerated, the same way it did whenever she was around him. He stared into her eyes. She was staring back at him, fear clouding her eyes.
"You don't have to be afraid," he whispered. "I'm here with you."
He stared at her lips, wishing he could kiss her. He wondered if she would let him. He looked back up at her eyes, then realized that she was staring at his lips. A small smile touched his face, and she found his eyes again, blushing.
"May I - ?" he started. She nodded, and closed her eyes. Remus kissed her slowly, gently, and deeply. His heart soared. He had never felt so good in his life.
-Rozlyn P.O.V.-
She had never felt so bad in her life. She could feel her bones shifting around. It didn't help that she could hear Remus screaming, too. Her own shrieks of pain added to the noise. She was breathing in long, shuddering gasps, then she realized that maybe it was better if she didn't breathe at all, so she stopped. At once, she began to black out, but the pain didn't leave her. If anything, it became worse.
Suddenly, it stopped. Rozlyn rolled over and stood on all fours. She gazed at the male werewolf in front of her. 'Remus,' a distant part of her mind thought. But that part of her was . . . fading away somehow. This wolf in front of her . . . it was no longer Remus. And she was no longer Rozlyn.
'Mate,' her werewolf mind decided.
^_~
I loved writing that chapter, too! Okay, I'm happier now that I've expressed my feelings. It took me all day to write this, but I can't update for a while. I have midterms all this coming week and I have projects due after that. I'll try to update as soon as I can, though! You know what to do! So stop reading, and REVIEW!
Ariana S.
A/N: ok, I'm pissed. ff.net took off my fanfic "Spicyness" I didn't know they could do that! I'm still new to this site! But since I'm pissed, I shall express my emotions through my writing like I always do.
Chapter Ten - Pain
-Remus P.O.V.-
He had been watching her all week and he had never known he was capable of feeling so much guilt. She was as pale as he was, and she also wasn't eating as much. Remus noticed that this gave her a weak, sickly look.
Usually, the day of his transformation, he'd be in the hospital wing, or resting elsewhere. But she was attending classes, and Remus wanted to watch over her. (A/N: yeah, right. We all know that Remus is sweet and everything, but come on, he's a guy - this is all about dominance and being the strongest werewolf - lol)
He soon wished that he had gone to the hospital wing, though, because as soon as he stepped into Transfiguration his pains started up ten times worse. He took a long, shaky breath and went to sit in his seat, which was, fortunately for him, directly behind Rozlyn's.
From where he sat, she seemed to be having and even worse time of it than he was. She was hunched over and was gripping the table in front of her so hard that her knuckles turned twenty times whiter than his parchment. And with his excellent hearing, he could hear her slow, shuddering gasps as she struggled to breathe.
Remus watched her, confused. 'How come she won't go to the hospital wing?' he thought. Staying in class was torture for him, and as she was a first time werewolf, he knew it must have been agony for her.
Finally, (after watching her do this for the millionth time) he stood up in the middle of McGonagall's lesson. "Professor, may I please escort Rozlyn to the hospital wing?" His face turned bright red as everyone turned to stare at him (except Rozlyn - she was still trying to breathe) including Professor McGonagall.
"Mr. Lupin, what - ?" McGonagall started, but Rozlyn interrupted her.
"No," she said. "I don't want to go."
Now everyone's attention was turned to her, Remus' included. "Why the devil not?" he asked. "You're sick. You should go see Madam - "
"I said, no!" she repeated, without turning around.
"But you're sick," Remus argued. "Professor, doesn't she look sick to you?"
Professor McGonagall looked at Rozlyn closely. "As a matter of fact, Ms. Jenkins, you do look rather - "
"NO!" Rozlyn yelled. She stood up and turned on Remus, her eyes flashing angrily. "Can't you take 'no' for an answer!? Dammit Lupin, leave me alone!"
Remus sat down hard, his face burning in humiliation and shame. He stared down at the table in front of him, wishing he could disapparate.
-Rozlyn P.O.V.-
She was faintly aware of a buzzing sound, then she realized that the whole class was silent, save for the bees they were supposed to be transfiguring into quills that day. (A/N: gross!)
She sat down quickly, but not before catching a glimpse of Remus' face. She suddenly got a horrible sinking feeling. 'Oh, Merlin, what have I done?' she thought.
-Remus P.O.V.-
He had never wanted class to end so badly. At the bell he was out of the door so fast that he failed to hear the homework assignment.
He ran straight for the hospital wing. So much for trying to be a hero.
-Rozlyn P.O.V.-
"Ms. Jenkins?" Rozlyn was almost at the door when she heard Professor McGonagall call her name. The burning feeling came back to her face.
She stopped and turned slowly. McGonagall's expression was strange - it was stern, yet sad at the same time. Rozlyn walked up to her desk, tentatively.
"Yes, Professor?"
"Ms. Jenkins, that was simply uncalled for," Professor McGonagall started. "However, as I am aware of your condition. I will let it go. You deserve a detention, but I daresay your transformation will be painful enough, so instead I'll be forced to take twenty points from Gryffindor, and I do believe that you owe Mr. Lupin an apology - a very sincere and profound apology."
Rozlyn nodded, keeping her eyes glued to the floor. "Yes, Ma'am," she whispered. Quickly, she turned and sprinted for the door.
She started to go for the common room, but stopped. Remus' scent had gone cold. 'He probably went to the hospital wing,' she thought, her face reddening.
"Rozlyn," Lily's voice came out of nowhere. Rozlyn looked up in surprise. Lily smiled hesitantly. "Um, first I just wanted to say, 'wow.' Second, I just wanted to say, 'wow.'"
Rozlyn blushed. "I didn't mean to yell at him," she mumbled.
"Well, you did!" Lily said, looking stunned.
"Too right you did!" the angry voice of James said from behind them.
The girls spun around to see that Sirius was with him, and they were both glaring furiously. Rozlyn shivered. They looked a little . . . murderous.
"Leave her alone!" Lily said, putting her hands on her hips.
"Stay out of it, Evans!" James retorted. "This has nothing to do with you."
"Nor with you!" Lily snapped.
Rozlyn sighed. "No, Lily. He's right. It really is none of your business."
Lily turned around and stared at her. "What?"
Rozlyn swallowed nervously. "Listen, Lily, maybe this isn't the time . . ."
No one spoke for a moment, then Lily said, "Fine, if that's how you want it. You know, Rozlyn, you've been acting weird all week, and now you have a secret with them and not me? I thought I was your friend!"
Rozlyn shook her head. "No, it's not like that, but . . . I can't tell you."
"Why not!? You obviously trust them with your secret!" Lily exclaimed angrily.
Rozlyn felt like crying. "You don't understand - "
"Now that you mention it, you're right, Jenkins. There are a lot of things I don't understand about you. I call you my friend, and yet, we've been sharing a dorm for five years, and I know absolutely nothing about you!"
"Lily, please - "
"No, I don't think I want to listen now!" Lily interrupted. She stalked off, throwing back a poisonous look to Sirius who'd been standing in her way.
Rozlyn didn't know how to react. Neither did James and Sirius, she noticed. She sighed. "I'm going to the hospital wing. Remus is there. Come on, if you're coming," she said in a perfectly flat voice.
They didn't say a word as she led them to the hospital wing. The only way she could tell they were there was because she could hear two separate heartbeats, and the blood rushing through their bodies. Her own heartbeat quickened and her face grew slightly red as she realized that all these heightened senses made her feel somewhat . . . sexually aroused. She wondered if Remus ever felt this way.
'No, Rozlyn! Stop it!' she told herself, blushing furiously. She took a deep breath and stepped into the hospital wing.
"Madam Pomphrey's not here," she said softly.
"Is Remus?" Sirius asked. She nodded, without looking back.
"He's behind that curtain," she pointed, then sat down on a bed.
-Remus P.O.V.-
Remus' eyes were closed, but he wasn't asleep. He just wasn't up to talking to anyone at the moment. 'Can't you take 'no' for an answer!? Dammit Lupin, leave me alone!' The words rang in his head over and over.
He turned over, willing himself not to cry. Now, she really did hate him.
~_~
"Remus!" James' voice hissed.
Remus knew they were coming. He had just hoped that for once, his stupid wolf senses were wrong. He kept his eyes closed wishing James and Sirius would go away.
"Remus!" Sirius echoed. "Wake up! Come on, mate!"
Remus sighed and opened his eyes sleepily. He stared at them with his perfect wolf vision.
"Jeez, you're like the sleeping dead," James muttered.
"What do you want?" Remus said, quietly. He had just picked up Rozlyn's scent, and it was making him feel worse.
James and Sirius exchanged a look. "Just wanted to check on you," James said, lowering his voice. "You're okay, right?"
Remus closed his eyes again. "I'm fine," he mumbled. "Just fine."
"Well, if you're sure, then," Sirius said. "Bye."
"Bye," James repeated. Remus didn't open his eyes again until they were both gone.
-Rozlyn P.O.V.-
She sat on her bed and stared at Remus' curtain. She had to do apologize soon. There was really no use in delaying it. And she had to do it before Madam Pomphrey returned, but every time she closed her eyes, she kept seeing that hurt look on his face.
She took a deep breath. 'This was Remus Lupin, remember?' she told herself. 'This is the guy you've had a crush on since first year when he helped you carry your books. This is sweet, sensitive Remus Lupin.'
She stood up and pulled back his curtain to find him awake and staring at her. Her first instinct was to back away, but she shook her head and went closer to him. He didn't say a word.
"Remus?" she whispered. Her heart was pounding like crazy. She knew he could hear it. 'Wait? Is that mine? Or his?'
He didn't answer her, but he didn't look away either.
"Remus, I'm sorry," she said. "I really am. It's just . . . the pain was getting to me, and you're right, I should've come here, but . . . I'm - I just - " She stopped and looked away. "Never mind. I'll just leave you alone."
She turned around and started to go, but then she heard him get up. And then, he was suddenly behind her with his hand gently placed on her shoulder. "No, Rozlyn," he said quietly. "Tell me. What is it?"
She turned around, and caught her breath. Did he know what he did to her? Did he realize how her heartbeat speeded up whenever she was around him? 'Probably,' she answered herself.
"I-I don't w-want to believe it," she stammered. "I thought m-maybe if I ig- ignored it, it might g-go away."
He gazed into her eyes. Rozlyn felt like he was staring past her eyes, right into her aching soul. 'Does he know what he does to me?' she asked herself, again.
"But it won't, will it?" she said it so low, she could barely hear herself. He shook his head. She could see her own pain reflected in his eyes. Or was that his?
-Remus P.O.V.-
Remus didn't know what he was doing anymore. He brought one hand up slowly and touched the side of her face. His heartbeat accelerated, the same way it did whenever she was around him. He stared into her eyes. She was staring back at him, fear clouding her eyes.
"You don't have to be afraid," he whispered. "I'm here with you."
He stared at her lips, wishing he could kiss her. He wondered if she would let him. He looked back up at her eyes, then realized that she was staring at his lips. A small smile touched his face, and she found his eyes again, blushing.
"May I - ?" he started. She nodded, and closed her eyes. Remus kissed her slowly, gently, and deeply. His heart soared. He had never felt so good in his life.
-Rozlyn P.O.V.-
She had never felt so bad in her life. She could feel her bones shifting around. It didn't help that she could hear Remus screaming, too. Her own shrieks of pain added to the noise. She was breathing in long, shuddering gasps, then she realized that maybe it was better if she didn't breathe at all, so she stopped. At once, she began to black out, but the pain didn't leave her. If anything, it became worse.
Suddenly, it stopped. Rozlyn rolled over and stood on all fours. She gazed at the male werewolf in front of her. 'Remus,' a distant part of her mind thought. But that part of her was . . . fading away somehow. This wolf in front of her . . . it was no longer Remus. And she was no longer Rozlyn.
'Mate,' her werewolf mind decided.
^_~
I loved writing that chapter, too! Okay, I'm happier now that I've expressed my feelings. It took me all day to write this, but I can't update for a while. I have midterms all this coming week and I have projects due after that. I'll try to update as soon as I can, though! You know what to do! So stop reading, and REVIEW!
Ariana S.