I left the meeting with the professor a little uneasy. I showed him how I switch off my powers and showed him I could turn them on as well. He also said there is something amiss with the blocks he placed in my head to supress the over bearing memory of Carol. He said it was holding but it's not quite right. My mind was slightly exhausted and he said we would search more in a day or two.

"Hello, Ma petite."

"Hey Sugah. How are ya?"

"Good. You chere?"

"Alright. Mah skin feels all tinglely. Ah had ta switch mah mutation on and off today."

"You ready ta go ta bed chere?"

"Alright."

I was running away. She was so angry.

"You! You're the reason I'm no longer alive. If not for you. . . "

"Ah'm sorry. Ah never wanted ta hurt ya. Ah had no choice."

"Ther's always a choice you little theif! You stole everything I had and then killed me!"

"No, Ah'm sorry. If Ah could Ah would help you. Really. Ah would."

"Well Lets's just see how much you like it when everything you have worked for is taken away."

I woke up in a cold sweat and choked back a scream.

"Chere. What da matter? Dat Dream gain?"

"Yeah. Ah think she's gettin' stronger. Professor said there might be somethin' wrong with the block in my head."

"Should we get him now?"

"No it can wait til mornin' Ah think."

I could feel her at the edge of my mind. She was free. I could feel it.

"Come here, Chere."

I snuggled close and he wrapped his arms around my naked body. His body heat warmed my up immedeatly and he stroked a finger down my spine.

"Gambit love you, Chere."

"Ah love ya too, Cajun."

He lowered his mouth on mine. Our arms and legs entangled.

I heard the laughter in my head and my mutation switched on full force. I tried to untangle myself. In a panic I got caught in the sheets. So much skin to skin contact.

I could feel his life drainding away into me.

I finally fall to the floor.

I shriek, "HELP!!! SOMEONE!! ANYONE!! HELP ME!! Gambit." he wasn't breathing. I couldn't touch him.

"help me."

Jean ran in followed by many of the X-men.

"Rogue what happened?"

"Ah didn't mean to. Ah don't know what happened."

I cried. When Jubes came near me I jerked away.

"DON'T! Don't touch me!"

Jean was breathin into Remy, I silently begged him to live.

"He's breathing. Let's get him down to the Lab."

"Rogue. It's me, Charles. Rogue look at me."

I turned my head from Remy to the professor.

"Rogue Let me see into you mind."

________________________________

I woke in the med Lab next to Remy.

I remembered what happened.

"Rogue. I was able to remove any remaining essence of Carol. It was too dangerous for her to remain. Unfourtunatly it was not without cost. Your switch for your mutation. The path has been lost. We may not be able to turn it off any more."

I barely listened.

Gambit was in a coma. He remained there for three week or more. It was the third week I made my decision. I packed my bags and flew away. I left behind my home, family, freinds, my love, and my life. And a letter. For him.

___________________________________________________

Remy read the letter again. He had been out of the coma for a week. Rogue, his Rogue left three weeks ago.

My Dearest Remy,

I'm sorry for what I put you through. I never meant to hurt you. I love you too much.

I can't turn it off any more. I lost it that night and I will never be able to reclaim what I have lost. I mean more then the control of my powers.

I will never be able to touch you the way you deserve. I can't kiss you, or touch you, feel the stubble of you cheek, or the softness or your lips. You deserve to have someone who can touch you the way I never will be able to again.

I have to go. I will not be able to stand being with you, being close to you and not take you in my arms and run my fingers across your cheast. Not bruching my lips to your ear. Not holding your fingers and lacing them through my own. I would die.

I have to go.

I am going back to my mother. She misses me so, and I want to see her. I am going to stay with her.

I hope you can find some one to make you as happy as I have been with you.

Good bye, my only true love.

Love always and forever,

Marie.

__________________________________________________________

and on the radio it played:

of all the things I beleived in

I just want to get it over with

Tears form behind my eyes but i do not cry

counting the days that past me by

i been searching deep down in my soul

words that I'm hearing are starting to get old

It feel like i'm starting all over again

the last three years were just pretend

and i said

Good bye to you

Good bye to every thing I thought i knew

You were the one i loved

the one thing that i tried to hold on to.

I still get lost in your eyes

and it feel like i cant live a day without you

closing my eyes you chase my thoughts way

to a place where I am blinded by the light

but its not right

Good bye to you

Good bye to every thing I thought i knew

You were the one i loved

the one thing that i tried to hold on to.

and hurt to want every thing an nothing at the same time

I want whats yours and i want what's mine

i want you but i'm not giving in this time

Good bye to you

Good bye to every thing I thought i knew

You were the one i loved

the one thing that i tried to hold on to.

and when the stars fall i will lie awake

you're my shooting star