If I Were A Rich Man

Note: This is a Lupin III fanfic. It's been quite some time since I have written a Lupin fanfic, but I recently watched the "Fuma Clan" movie, I couldn't resist writing another fanfic. Dominique has wanted a thief to carry on the La Trek name. Christina wants to be a lawyer like her father when she grows up, and she is in High School right now. How time flies ! Arsene Lupin IV still has a fiancée, and they are likely to get married, God only knows where they are. Carmen, the youngest, is schooled in the way of the thief. She's going to grow up to be a grand cat burglar. Christina can fend for herself now; she has never been kidnapped since the Compulsion incident, which she barely remembers. She still has the same boyfriend, who has been her friend for ages past. Dominique reminisces of time past...Jean is thinking that they should have another baby, but all the money that they have stolen in the past, is running out. The same is happening to Lupin and Fujiko...And God knows Interpol is lurking out there, hunting them down...

"Two minds, one voice. What a revolting development."—dad's quote (of course, he was just joking around w/ my mother)

"Would he recognize himself ? Who knows ?"—Marilyn Kallet

Chapter 1—Planning For a New Arrival, But...

Dominique looked lovingly into Jean's eyes. "Where has the time gone ?", she questioned, stroking back his raven hair. She kissed him gently. "I've been wondering the same thing, my love. Our darling baby girl is in High School, getting ready to become a lawyer like yours truly.", Jean said, kissing her back, holding onto her. "I was wondering, Jean...What it would be like to have a daughter just like me. Her name would be Felicity and she would be the greatest thief alive !", Dominique said, her brown eyes focusing on Jean so intently, he felt like he could melt at that moment. Jean sighed.

"We are losing money. We're no longer rich like we were when we robbed Sweden. I am sure the bank is catching on to who is robbing them, my dear.", Jean said, winking at his wife. Dominique blushed. "Yes, but my newest job is even better...I get to fix computers...And hack into them without anyone's notice. Much better than the banking job. But, you're right. It's not enough. How are we going to afford a newborn if we don't even have enough money to pay for Christina's graduation ?", Dominique said. "I want to have another baby as much as you do...But first we have to find money. I've heard rumors about a place in Ireland that is filled with treasure...Problem is, I don't know where in Ireland.", Jean said. "All right...I'll start researching tomorrow.", Dominique said. Jean pulled Dominique close to him, and whispered, "I love you. And, I promise we will have a little thief just like you. You want your legacy to live on. There is nothing wrong with that." Dominique smiled and held Jean close. "You are so good to me, Jean...I love you so dearly." Then, the two finally went to sleep.

Chapter 2—Research and Development

Dominique began to look up websites for Ireland. She only found one that had any useful information. It told of a castle in the secluded woods of Ireland, and exactly where the treasure was buried. The castle had no traps, thank heaven, but it was heavily guarded, which means...If Interpol found out, they'd come looking for the Lupin gang. So, Dominique was discreet. When she had gotten the information, she saved it on a disk, and kept it in her laptop computer...Then, she called Lupin and the others. When Lupin heard he said, "Dominique, my little sister-in-law ! What a joy it is to hear you ! It's been so long since our last family reunion..." Dominique smiled and laughed. "Arsene, you'll like this news...You see, there's a castle in Dublin"....

Meanwhile, at Interpol Headquarters

Maria II was throwing darts at a dartboard. For some odd reason, she had felt that for the past few years, things had gotten quiet and the Lupin gang had been heard of no more. True, Compulsion had Interpol's attention for quite some time before they were shut down and taken downtown. But, the stillness was odd. Peculiar, even quaint. Maria II couldn't help thinking that the Lupin gang had ceased to exist. But, such a thing could not be...Crimes in Japan had gone drastically down, but this was unheard of. It was too quiet. She kept on throwing darts at the dartboard, staring into space. Onsen came into the door, "Ma'am ! I have found some news on the Internet...About the lost treasure in Ireland." Tochiro came in secondly. "Don't take all the credit for it Onsen, you don't even know how to use a computer, let alone know how a keyboard works !" Onsen lowered his head, embarrassed. Maria looked at them, waiting for the information. She was quietly polishing her Magnum 45. "Here's the scoop. In Dublin, there is a castle, which holds in its attic, treasure galore. And, if I am not mistaken, you know who will be after it.", Tochiro said. "Lupin !", Onsen said, feeling smart. When she heard the name Lupin, she thought, "Nah, he can't exist anymore...He settled down, gave up on the robbing trade...Then again..." She had heard about small, petty crimes that the Lupin gang had committed. Maybe this was her big break to finally capture Lupin and put him away for good ! She rubbed her hands together greedily. She stood upon her desk and took a warrior like pose..."Father, I swear, by your blood, Lupin and his gang...Will be MINE !" Tochiro and Onsen looked at each other, oddly. "She's got issues.", Onsen murmured to Tochiro, and fortunately, Maria Zenigata did not hear.

Chapter 3—Ireland, The Land O' Luck

Lupin and the gang set out for Ireland. They took what money they had after Christina had graduated. Most of the money was gone, but what they had left was enough to get to Ireland and back, which was all they needed. Soon, they were on an ATA Flight to Ireland...Interpol, not too far behind. Maria was prepared, and she had even called backup to surround the castle using lethal weapons. Lupin and his friends would have to try all the tricks in the book to get past Interpol, but knowing Lupin and his cunning nature that wouldn't be too hard...

Finally, the group had arrived in Ireland. It was summer and the entire land was a beautiful emerald green. Dominique sang an Irish song, "May the Road Rise to Meet You", but not too loudly because she, just like Goemon could sense that Interpol could be nearby anywhere. From there, they weren't too far away from Dublin. "How did Interpol hear about this, Boss ?", Jigen asked, very curious. "The Internet, no doubt about it. As soon as they heard, they guessed we'd be on our way. I estimate there will be 100 or more Interpol agents guarding the castle.", Lupin said. "100 or more ?", Jigen said, in disbelief. "They must be desperate.", Goemon said, calmly and quietly, unsheathing his sword slowly. Dominique began to unsheathe her sword, it glinted in the dim light...She held it on her shoulder in a relaxed fashion. Fujiko looked at her husband awaiting a plan. "This is supposed to be the "land of luck". We could use some right now.", Jigen muttered sarcastically. The group was silent for a while, as night began to fall. "So, what's our move, Arsene ?", Fujiko finally asked, wondering what Lupin was planning. "Aha ! I have it ! Come here...This is my plan...", Lupin said, beckoning his friends to join him...

Chapter 4—Dublin Castle

Carmen, the youngest was a diligent and helpful young woman. She had blossomed into a master thief when she reached her teens, and she was perfecting the art in every caper with her parents and friends. She followed her father, and knew what to do next...Distract the guards !

Distracting the guards was pretty easy because Dominique and Goemon had sliced the guards' belts and they were too busy trying to keep their trousers in place instead of catching Lupin and his gang. Then, entered Maria II. Plucky, attractive, intelligent determined Maria Zenigata. She was not going to fail this time. She knew who to attack first, the samurai. She dove for Goemon, knocking him down, and Tochiro held Dominique back as she struggled. "Let me go !", she said. Jigen shot a bullet at Tochiro, scaring him out of his mind. Carmen, was ahead of everyone else, and the guards looked like morons as they continued to lose their balance and fall into the moat, emerging soaking wet.
The gang got away, but Maria had actually caught Lupin. Lupin couldn't believe the strong grip that Maria had on his wrists. "Finally, I have you !", she said. "Your father would be very proud of you...", Lupin said, watching his gang infiltrate the castle.

"At least they made it.", he thought. He didn't know what would happen to him...And it would take at least a moment after the excitement to die down that Lupin was gone...

Chapter 5—Our Fearless Leader

Fujiko knew that Lupin was gone. "I can't believe that Maria actually captured him...I should've stopped Onsen before he struck me to the ground, but I was busy fighting off guards !", she said, a little angered. Dominique had her head lowered. "What's the Lupin gang without Lupin ?", she murmured. "We have to find out where he is.", Jigen declared, hands at his sides. "Hey, guys ! Don't fret ! We'll find my father...We just have to start the search.", Carmen said. Dominique looked at Goemon, and his expression was somber, an expression she hadn't seen before. "What's the matter ?", she asked. "I think I know where Maria might have taken him.", Goemon said. "Tell us !", the others demanded in awe. Dominique could almost sense it, but she said it with him..."The Brig of Doom." Dominique's eyes grew pale. She shuddered. "I know of that place.", she said. "You had a feeling about it too...", Goemon said, nodding. She said, "Yes", without much change in her tone of voice. Together the two lead the way, and made it to the eerie place called the Brig of Doom.

Chapter 6—Brig of Doom

It was a long trek by foot, but the gang had made it, without tiring.
Dominique looked at the gray, slate dungeon. Her tone of voice was still emotionless. She seemed to be guided by a supernatural sense and Goemon as well. The others were frightened, but they knew they could trust the guidance of Goemon and Dominique because their extrasensory perception never led them wrong.

As soon as they came to the door of the Brig, they could hear Lupin singing the blues in his cell, and Maria was sitting at her desk, filing her nails happily. "Keep those blues coming !", she would say, periodically. Goemon sliced at the door first, and Dominique secondly. The doors fell to the sides and onto the ground with a loud "BOOM !" Maria jumped up from her seat, and Lupin stopped singing. Onsen and Tochiro, standing by either side of Maria's desk were looking around wondering who made such a raucous noise. Dominique sneaked in, quiet as a mouse...and while the others were looking around minding their own business, she cut the prison doors open and freed Lupin. "I knew you guys would save me. I never gave up hope.", he said, with a smile. Jigen started taunting the Maria and her employees..."Hey, don't look now, but...Guess what ? Lupin's free !" Maria fumed ! "NO !" She said, lunging at Jigen. She wrestled him to the ground, and the others tried to help him. Onsen and Tochiro were fighting off the rest of Lupin's gang, but Carmen gave them a good fist to the upper jaw and they were knocked unconscious. Maria wrestled furiously, and then Jigen pinned her. "I don't hit women. It's against my code.", he said, and let her go. Maria got up, and was exhausted. "Ok. OK ! You win ! You win again ! At least I can say I had Lupin in a cell for one full hour !", she said. Lupin smiled at her. "You're a good sport, Marie. You really do have a good heart in you." Maria couldn't help but smile, her lip bloodied and her uniform in shambles. She laughed. "Next time, I will catch you though...You can count on it !", Maria exclaimed. Then she collapsed to the floor. Before she could hit the ground, Goemon caught her. He placed her in her chair behind her desk and let her rest there. She was asleep. The group left, having a feeling that this wasn't the last time they would have to deal with Maria. Maria was a formidable rival.

Chapter 7—Counting The Gold...A Real Treasure

The gang had returned home. They were wondering about Interpol and Maria, Onsen and Tochiro, but they knew they would be fine. It would be some time until they had another caper. But, frankly, Lupin and the gang were getting a little too old for capers. Arsene Lupin IV was beginning to outshine his father with Gail. The newer thieves were often better, but they were more awkward than Lupin's gang was. When it came to experience in capers, Arsene and Gail were only learners.

Everyone in the gang was enjoying the wealth they had gathered. They were rich once again. But, how long would this last ? Knowing that Carmen would graduate in the future, the money would probably not last long. But, there was a real treasure in the homes of Lupin and his friends. It was friendship and love. Not only that, but Dominique was pregnant with a baby girl, whom she was going to name Felicity. When the others had heard about this news, they were overjoyed. The Lupin Gang was growing bigger.

Chapter 8—Felicity Lupin III

Felicity was only a darling baby girl now, but she was growing like kudzu vines ! She looked just like her mother, brown hair, brown eyes, a cute button nose and round little face. When she was born, Dominique knew she would grow up to be a thief. Felicity had a mischievous twinkle in her eyes that was only common to thieves. She was the love of the Lupin gang. Everyone adored her, even Christina, who came back from her campus to visit. She knew about her baby sister, and visited her every so often. She loved her so much that she had pictures of her in her wallet, in her dorm room, and even inside her locket necklace. She was still dating the young boy she had met in High School and they had been sweethearts for a long time. She was enjoying her college years so far, and she would most likely be a lawyer when she graduated. As for her boyfriend, he was going to get involved in software...That was where the big money was.

Chapter 9—All Is Well

Dominique was writing in her journal like she always did. She finished writing and shut the book. Jean looked over her shoulder and said, "Come look at Felicity. She's fast asleep." Dominique kissed Jean tenderly, and said, "She's so beautiful. I am glad that she is our daughter." Jean smiled and chuckled, kissing Dominique's forehead and resting his head on her shoulder. "We'll teach her everything we know.", Dominique said. "I can imagine !", Jean said, flashing a toothy grin at Dominique. "She will indeed be a marvelous thief. You turned out well, but you taught yourself.", Jean said. "Of course.", Dominique replied. They entwined arms and held each other close, hearing the lulling sounds of each other's rhythmic heartbeats. "All is well for now...We have nothing to fear.", Jean said. "That's true. Not until another caper...", Dominique says. Jean tenderly pulled Dominique close, looking into her brown eyes. "Let us hope that you do not have one for a long, long time, my love.", he crooned. Dominique placed her head on Jean's chest, loving every moment in Jean's tender embrace. She knew that she wouldn't have a caper for a long, long time. She would have to wait for her daughter to come of age. Until then, the Lupin gang was relatively rich, and a new thief was about to be made.

To Be Continued...

"All I Ever Wanted"...This is the conclusion to "If I Were A Rich Man". Here, Maria almost comes to her end when she is literally hanging on for her life in the dizzying heights of the Grand Canyon. Will she indeed die, or come close to it and have some type of revolution ? Has Maria's obsession with capturing Lupin gone too far ?

By: Elizabeth Berndt April 18, 2000