*SFG sidles into the room, grinning bemusedly*
SFG: Hello everyone and welcome to LOTR Self Help classes #2! Now..what are your problems?
Eowyn: This snake keeps stalking me
Worm: I'm not stalking you, just lovingly stalking!
Eowyn: It's the same thing snake
Balrog: I'm kinda smote on the mountainside at the moment, so I'm here by videophone
Sauron: I'm an eye. How do you think I feel at the moment?!
Boromir: I'm here again because I STILL don't have counseling on being dead!
Gollum: My precioussssss...where's the precious..
Theoden: I'm dead too..
Boromir: Heyness! We can be dead together!
Theoden: Joy! Rapture!
Sauron: I'm still an eye you know..not dead..but only a eye
Saruman: Well how do you think I feel?! BOTH my quests for conquest have gone down the drain! None of you know my pain! *huddles in a corner and sobs*
Eowyn: -acts all sarcastic- Oh you're SO acting your age..
Gollum: The precious is ours..
Worm: No..the precious is mine!! You did mean that Eowyn is the precious right?
Gollum: Precious..precious...
Eowyn: I am SO not precious! I'm a rooting tooting fighting machine
Theoden: Dear!
Balrog: Well I was..until SOMEONE killed me!
Saruman: Join the club sister..*sob* Gandalf ruined my life too..I feel your pain buddy..I really do.. Balrog: -acts all happy now-
Eowyn: *barfs*
Boromir: Oh that'll be good on your record
Gollum: Precious..the precious is lost..nasty Bagginses
Sauron: *blasts evil glare around the room*
Theoden: *snigger* That didn't do much
Saruman: SHUT IT! I need quiet right now..I really do..the world hates me..
Gollum: CAN IT YOU BATTY OLD BROAD!
*the whole room stops talking and stares at Gollum*
Gollum *ahem* My precious..nasty Bagginses..
Eowyn: Scared me there for a second..
Boromir: I thought you were the very wary scary berry marry larry..
Sauron: *shoots big eye thing over Boromir* My Orcs killed you once..
Saruman: Oh no! This is the last straw! IT WAS MY ORCS!
Sauron: Bah, you're dead, do you care?
Saruman: *starts to cry* Everyone hates me *sob*
Eowyn: Wow..he actually found that out?
Worm: Eowynpookins..can we go now?
Eowyn: DIE YOU FREAK *jumps on Worm and attacks him*
Worm: OWIEKINS!
Theoden: Dear! Don't fight with the other kiddies!
Gollum: BURRIOTS GO BYE BYE WITH BATBIE CHRISTMAS ASPARAGUS?
Balrog: He's scarier than I am..
Saruman: Duh..everyone is..even me..even though I'm hated...
SFG: Well that's all for today! Bye bye!
*herds then out*
SFG: Hello everyone and welcome to LOTR Self Help classes #2! Now..what are your problems?
Eowyn: This snake keeps stalking me
Worm: I'm not stalking you, just lovingly stalking!
Eowyn: It's the same thing snake
Balrog: I'm kinda smote on the mountainside at the moment, so I'm here by videophone
Sauron: I'm an eye. How do you think I feel at the moment?!
Boromir: I'm here again because I STILL don't have counseling on being dead!
Gollum: My precioussssss...where's the precious..
Theoden: I'm dead too..
Boromir: Heyness! We can be dead together!
Theoden: Joy! Rapture!
Sauron: I'm still an eye you know..not dead..but only a eye
Saruman: Well how do you think I feel?! BOTH my quests for conquest have gone down the drain! None of you know my pain! *huddles in a corner and sobs*
Eowyn: -acts all sarcastic- Oh you're SO acting your age..
Gollum: The precious is ours..
Worm: No..the precious is mine!! You did mean that Eowyn is the precious right?
Gollum: Precious..precious...
Eowyn: I am SO not precious! I'm a rooting tooting fighting machine
Theoden: Dear!
Balrog: Well I was..until SOMEONE killed me!
Saruman: Join the club sister..*sob* Gandalf ruined my life too..I feel your pain buddy..I really do.. Balrog: -acts all happy now-
Eowyn: *barfs*
Boromir: Oh that'll be good on your record
Gollum: Precious..the precious is lost..nasty Bagginses
Sauron: *blasts evil glare around the room*
Theoden: *snigger* That didn't do much
Saruman: SHUT IT! I need quiet right now..I really do..the world hates me..
Gollum: CAN IT YOU BATTY OLD BROAD!
*the whole room stops talking and stares at Gollum*
Gollum *ahem* My precious..nasty Bagginses..
Eowyn: Scared me there for a second..
Boromir: I thought you were the very wary scary berry marry larry..
Sauron: *shoots big eye thing over Boromir* My Orcs killed you once..
Saruman: Oh no! This is the last straw! IT WAS MY ORCS!
Sauron: Bah, you're dead, do you care?
Saruman: *starts to cry* Everyone hates me *sob*
Eowyn: Wow..he actually found that out?
Worm: Eowynpookins..can we go now?
Eowyn: DIE YOU FREAK *jumps on Worm and attacks him*
Worm: OWIEKINS!
Theoden: Dear! Don't fight with the other kiddies!
Gollum: BURRIOTS GO BYE BYE WITH BATBIE CHRISTMAS ASPARAGUS?
Balrog: He's scarier than I am..
Saruman: Duh..everyone is..even me..even though I'm hated...
SFG: Well that's all for today! Bye bye!
*herds then out*