Close encounters of the mechanical kind
Okay, one camera, a tape for each and as long as they want to do whatever they want… a recipe for complete chaos. Summaries are done by Koenma (you'll understand what I mean soon enough).
Hiei's movie:
Summary: basically, they forced him. He hates technology. Cameraperson: Kurama
fzzzzzzzzttt camera comes on and randomly moves around a large yard, covering everywhere but where Hiei is standing.
Kurama: wow! This thing is so cool! Hey is that a rare… Camera drops and random scuffling sounds and exclamations of pain are heard fine. This is Hiei's movie. And here he is… ta-da!! (Camera moves to Hiei seemingly leaning against a tree. Then the rope that ties him there comes into focus)
Hiei: let me go! Untie me!!
Yusuke: (off screen) if you do it we'll let you go. And you can't beat the cameraman.
Hiei: fine. Now untie me. (Yukina and Keiko untie him then run away.) Stupid 'home movies'. (Sits down and glares at camera) just to be on record, Kurama, I blame you. I hate cameras. I hate electricity, unless it's a weapon. This is pathetic. I should be training. I can't even do that. The little red eye leers at me and it is DISTURBING!!! This is all your fault. 'Oh' you said, 'what's this? What does it do? Can I see? Can we use it?' baka kitsune. Can I be done now?
Yusuke: (again off screen) you sound like a two year old. No.
Kurama: besides you haven't smiled once. You just sit there, like a log. And not a very pretty log either…(flowers in various shades of pink appear on Hiei) that's better. You look much happier now!
Hiei: Kurama! I'm going to kill you. (He rushes toward camera; camera is dropped once again. Scuffling noises. Yusuke picks up camera and talks in front of it)
Yusuke: Kurama's supposed to go next, but he's recovering from his big mouth's consequences, so I guess Botan can go next. (Camera scrolls around to focus on a blank wall)
Botan: oh dear. You can't see me can you? Oh well. Try again later.(back to Yusuke)
Yusuke: well we need a new tape anyway. Later!
Kuwabara's movie
Summary: we can't be quite sure what he's doing. It looks like; no, never mind. I have no clue. Good show if you're sleeping. Cameraperson: Yusuke
(Camera comes on and focuses on Kuwabara. Then it tilts so he's on his side.
Kuwabara: what should I do: oh. I know. I can sell it later too. (He starts kicking and flailing his arms randomly, and occasionally turns around)
Yusuke: what are you doing? You look stupid, even sideways.
Kuwabara: I'm dancing. What do you think it is?
Yusuke: well, uh, scary?
Hiei: (off screen) He looks like a cross between hot coals under his feet, a strong wind, and a couple of electric eels down his pants. Of course, no one can excuse your face.
Kuwabara: oh yeah, you stuck up shrimp get over here and say that to my face!
Hiei: I'd love to but it's too ugly! (Kuwabara yells and lunges off screen, apparently after Hiei. Hiei jumps on screen and sticks his tongue out and wiggles fingers in ears. He had sugar earlier) baka. You couldn't catch a- hey where'd he go?
Kuwabara: here I am shrimp! (He drops off a branch and behind to pummel Hiei who has his hands held behind his back by Kuwabara)
Yusuke: you two are acting like kids on a sugar high. Well, another movie ends in a fight. Okay, here's Kurama's.
Kurama's movie
Summary: well, at least these people are honest…of course they'll never question Kurama's sex ever again…or look at flowers the same way, for that matter. Cameraperson; Yukina
Yukina: wow, this is cool. I want one of these… of yeah… Kurama's movie, clap clap etc.
Kurama: (bows and smiles) I'm going to record my flower collection so I'll always have a record of it (tons of flowers appear) this is a-
Hiei: hey who are you? Get out of here!! Hey!
(a group of teen boys run on screen, stop, stare at the flowers, then at Kurama's back)
Boy 1: hey lady- oh my god! (Kurama turns around holding big bunch of flowers, w/wide-eyed stare.) Hey! You're a guy!
Boy2: where are you going, to get married? Who's the lucky guy? (Most drop on their butts laughing, Kurama's eyes narrow. Hiei walks near and smirks)
Hiei: you've done it now. You're dead. (He sees the camera and runs off screen muttering bout evil technology.)
Kurama: what did you say boy?
Boy1: excuse my friend miss. Sometimes he's a little outspoken. But it's not often a guy is so openly… well, yaoi. (Yukina's fingers close on the camera lens and yells are heard. A few min. later Kurama comes back on screen. A new plant that looks conspicuously like a huge Venus flytrap newly fed sits in the yard. Something wiggles and then holds still. The boys are missing.)
There you go r&r, please. I need knew ideas, I seem to have exhausted them for now. Writer's block is such a pain in the ass, and my head. Anyway, thanks for reading please review for me!!!
CHAPTER 2
Electricity
Title confuse you? Well wonder no more!! This is based on Hiei's extreme lack of knowledge about the human world. Those of you who would be offended, don't read. So there. Sticks out tongue this will probably be short. Just warning you.
Everyone is at Yusuke's house, talking, hanging out, etc.
Yusuke: so anyway, then he said- um Keiko? What are you doing?
Keiko: well, I'm going through your school bag to see if you did your homework or brought anything home to study.
Yusuke: Keiko, why do you do this to me every single day?!
Keiko: someone has to…
Kuwabara: he he Yusuke's getting bossed by a girl. You're more of a wuss than Hiei.
Kurama: speaking of Hiei, where is he?
Botan: uh guys? Look over here. Leans over a chair and points down. Every one comes over
Yusuke: Hiei? What are you doing?
Hiei: has sword out and is staring cautiously at a wall socket ssshhhh. It might attack at any minute. Does anyone know what this is?
Everyone: face fault
Yusuke: Hiei. That is a wall socket. It's been there for a while. I don't think that it's going to attack anytime soon.
Hiei: you knew this thing was here and didn't get rid of it?
Yusuke: well it's pretty harmless…
Hiei: inches toward wall, pulls sword back to swing then I'll get rid of it now.
Yusuke: No! Hiei you can't-
Hiei: thrusts sword into socket zzzzzzztttttttttttt!!! Lies on ground twitching every once in a while.
Yusuke: you okay?
Botan: pokes at him with her foot I think he's out cold.
Kuwabara: will he be okay?
Kurama: he should be…
Hiei:jumps up and looks ready to hack someone into little pieces YUSUKE!!!sees yusuke jumps over the chair and points katana at his throat why did you not tell me what that thing does?
Yusukehaving trouble breathing um, I tried Hiei, really! But you wouldn't listen!
Hiei: zzzzztt youhair fizzles, little bits of electricity run along the tips are so dead. jerks a little as soon as I get back to normal.walks out of room jerking around occasionally and zapping every electronic device in sight
Everyone: bursts out laughing
Kuwabara: that is the funniest thing I've ever seen!!
Botan: I wonder how long he'll stay like that…falls over laughing
Yusuke: yeah, that was good.
Kuramatrying not to laugh and not doing a very good job of it maybe you should have warned him to stay away from water…
Everyone:starts laughing even harder as it starts to rain and they hear Hiei yelling for Yusuke as loud as he can
Okay, so it's short. I wasn't terribly satisfied but you have to admit, the idea of Hiei walking along and suddenly spazzing out makes for a great mental picture. Ha ha ha. Whatever. Sorry it took so long to get it up. Long story and getting longer but you don't really care do you? I didn't think so. See ya!
