Cut Strings
Disclaimer: I do not own Rurouni Kenshin.
Summary: The insight of a woman's mind, this woman is tortured by the love her lover does not give her, and she cannot sleep anymore, for when she sleeps she dreams of a happiness that does not exist, but what scares her is that it always comes. This story can be any Male/Female pairing you want it to be.
Notes: READ THIS! Please do not tell me how I have so many grammar mistakes or any such things, I write like that on purpose to show you can have a good story without the period in the right place. Also this story was placed under the Aoshi/Misao pairing but it in itself can be whatever heterosexual pairing you want it to be. The only reason it was put under the AxM section was because that is most where all my love stories go and because I feel it is more like Aoshi and Misao more then any other couple.
Rated: PG, because it's DEPRESSING!!!!
Genre: Angst/Romance
4444
He waits for her to understand,
But she won't understand at all,
She waits all night for him to call,
But he won't call anymore . . .
He waits to hear her say:
"Forgive" But she just drops her pearl black eyes,
And prays to hear him say:
"I love you"
But he tells no more lies . . .
-Apart
Written and performed by The Cure
4444
She sat quietly in her wake, alone, as usual by the outside fire the others had gone; they had all gone to their minds where visions of what they truly wanted would swallow them until they woke. However, she could not go there, she would not go there, because every time she did, she dreamt of him, her beloved, in reality he really was a dream when you thought about it, he was to beautiful for such an ugly world. She dreamt that he would tell her that he loved her and that he would always be with her, she dreamt of a marriage that would never take place, and she dreamed of being his forever. But she always woke alone, always and that's what killed her the most, although she never showed it, it ate her from her insides and out. But what scared her most was that she knew it couldn't be avoided, sleep always came and that was also her greatest of fears.
When he came back, she had dreams that they would soon be together but dreams shatter so easily sometimes, they're all like porcelain.
You never know which dream breaks you the most so it's better just to not dream at all.
No one knew, but every night since his return she's silently cried herself to sleep, scared that when she woke up he'd be gone once more, and behind her smiles and laughter there was a thick black nothing known as emptiness that filled her heart. It made her feel dirty, as if she was a pig rolling around in the mud, it made her sad that she deceived everyone, but she couldn't . . . no she wouldn't . . . stop.
She fire blew ashes onto her clothes and hair, but she didn't care, not anymore, not ever, not even as it blew onto her face and into her eyes. Instead she just cried her silent cry and wished just for once that things would go her way, just once, but she guessed that would be called selfishness. So instead she thought about what might everyone do if she threw herself into the fire forever, would he cry? Would he care? Would he notice? Would he miss her? Would he stand in front of her grave and tell her spirit that he really did love her and that her suicide was for nothing? She dared not to find out.
So she guessed that was why she waited for him, so that maybe, just maybe, she'd have one tie to Earth, however she knew it was all a dream, a dream she hated with all her heart, she knew if she took a stand about her feelings he wouldn't care. He'd shut her out even further, and she'd die from the pain, she didn't know why she thought such things, they always depressed her and made her want to sleep, something she could not do anymore.
She was like a rag doll, something no one cared about, but something that longed for something beautiful.
The only good memory she holds onto took place a month ago, when she went out to the market and he had followed, she had seen a hair clip that had caught her eye. It had been of a colorless cherry blossom surrounded by sliver leaves and four long sliver chains falling down from the cherry blossom. She had only stared for a minute, but the next morning it laid on the floor next to her futon. However he had been the only one to see her stare at it and that made it impossible to have not come from him.
But that was the only good memory she could gather from her mind, sure they had spent time together before but that was the only one she held onto. The only memory she wanted to keep for the life of her.
So maybe good things do exist.
She stared into the flame watching as the red mixed with the yellow, orange, and the blue. She watched as the ash flew out of the fire and how it lit on the ground for a minute before dying.
"What are you doing?"
She turned her head and made eye contact with him.
"What does it look like?" She said in a tired voice.
". . ."
Of course he never said anything . . .
However perhaps that was a good thing, because now she found herself in a hard embrace.
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing, just tired."
Lies.
The embrace was now gone and he stood, looking down on her.
"Go to bed soon."
"Hai."
With that he was gone, like always he never stayed, however a small smile came onto her lips as she remembered he had hugged her. And so, she stood and let the fire burn, and so she stood and walked back into the house, and so she followed his every move, and so she stood in her room, and so she fell into the blissful sleep she feared, and so she woke to find him near. She now no longer woke alone.
Notes: This was a ONESHOT that means no more of this thing. Sorry. R&R please!