Disclaimer: Chapter one, part one.
A/N: I was rather stuck with my story, until I suddenly stumbled over a song called "Dante's Prayer" by Loreena McKennit. It has been my inspiration and if you have not heard the song, I suggest you do.
Chapter nineteen: FeaTaur.
The world ended.
A dark wood fell before her. The trees, tall, dark and silent, like rows of soldiers, rose to a star lit sky. Around her, small lights in different colours danced silently around her. She felt her self, drifting towards the trees and she saw they pass by her in a blurry motion as if in a dream. At last, she stood in front of an overgrown path.
"Legolas?" she spoke softly as she entered the forest. She could not see him anywhere, and terror fluttered through her body. He had to be here, somewhere.
Suddenly, six lights appeared in the darkness, like torches. She hesitated. The lights floated silently a couple of meters over the ground, and then she started to move towards them. The illumination seemed tangible, but she dared not to touch them. As she stood among the small orbs of lights, a question slowly drifted towards her mind, as she heard her self ask.
"Am I dead?"
One by one, the orbs started to stretch and the lights grew until it blended her. She covered her eyes, and she felt a small tingles run through her body. When she opened her eyes again, six female elves stood before her. They were in white, tall, with dresses sweeping the ground, their hair were ashy and ran freely down to their waist their skin were as white as snow and it glowed faintly bluish. Their eyes were dark green and burned lifelessly.
"Am I dead? Is Legolas here?" Feavair repeated. One of the women reached out her hand, as if she was going to shake it, then she changed her mind and instead bowed deeply. The others soon followed, and they kept their gaze to the ground.
"Am I dead? Please, answer me"
"Yes" One of the woman said, and immediately another one, added. "And no" The voices seemed to echo through the forest, and she could hear the answer of the resonance far away in the darkness.
"Part of you is dead"
"Part of you is alive"
Feavair closed her eyes briefly and then she asked.
"Where am I? Who are you?"
"FeaTaur"
"We are the Spirit Weavers long forgotten, and long since passed"
"The Weavers…. but there are only six of you, where is my mother."
"Your mother betrayed her kin"
"What do you mean?"
"We were trapped in the darkness, waiting for death. Your mother bought her freedom with you and with the prize of the world" It seemed like it was one person, talking, but at the same time it seemed to be everybody at the same time.
She swallowed.
"No, she did not. He threatened to kill her, to kill you to"
"We were already dead, and you were not even a seed in your mothers womb"
"What do you mean?" Feavair asked again.
"Spirit Weavers can not bare children. Our powers descends upon the child, and as it does, we die"
"The Dark Lord fooled you mother. She believed that she would carry his child, live, and then rule the shadows"
Her body started to tremble and she sat down, her feet not able to carry her anymore.
"We have waited for you sister, you have wandered a long time, and your spirit has been trapped, clouded by the presence of darkness" Slowly they raised their gaze and meet hers.
"But if you are dead, and are here…and I am here…that must mean that I to am dead?" and she realized that she was not upset. For the first time she felt safe, she felt like she belonged, she felt peace.
"The Dark Spirit that you carried is dead, and the light inside you is liberated, that is why you are here."
She looked at her self, and saw that all her cuts and wounds were gone. Her skin was clean and as white as the other Weavers were; gone was her crumbled, dirty and worn dress and instead she was wearing the same long white dress as the others. It hugged her body nicely and the sleeves disappeared over her fingers. The twigs and tangles were gone from her hair, and it had grown back to its full length, before it was cut in Rivendell in order to remove the mess.
"What kind of place is this….FeaTaur? What about Legolas and Boromir?" she asked, almost embarrassed to ask all these questions. The others seemed motionless and one of them answered calmly.
" We do not know those you speak off. All the clean spirits of the world come here and yonder, to rest before they go to the Hall. Here there is no emotions, no thoughts no time. There exists no tomorrow, or no yesterday, there is only now." As if to demonstrate her point, some of the lights she had seen started to twirl around them and she heard a silent buzzing, echoes of life. Each glowing orb contained the memory, experience, and the very essence of a being that had once walked the earth.
"As long as we are in the minds and hearts of those we left, some spirits go away, but the children of the stars return to earth to continue the cycle of life and death until the world ends."
"I….I don't understand….you keep saying that…." Feavair stuttered.
"You have been given a choice," one of them said, in the same calm, emotionless voice.
"You can stay here with your sister in FeaTaur and embrace your harmony. Even though you are a child of the stars, you will not return to the cycle."
"You can go back to the World, and keep living, keep suffering"
Feavair looked down in the ground not sure what to do. They were offering her the peace she had been walking towards, the one she had feared Legolas and Boromir had stolen from her. But that was before she had a choice. Before, she had nothing else then to free her self and the world from the evil spirit. Now, she had a choice.
"Be in this forest….forever, for all eternity?" she asked slowly.
"There is no time, there is no forever, there is just now" one of them repeated. "You will rid your self of all your emotions and all your memories, you will merely exists in the faint memory of others"
"And if…. if I go back?" she asked silently.
"You will be stripped of your power, your spirit"
"But…. how can…can I live without a spirit?" she asked shocked.
"You cannot," they answered simply.
"So this is a no win situation" she stated and felt her heart sink.
"If you find your own way out of this forest, you may keep your spirit"
"Oh…. okay then" she said, and started to back away, when suddenly a voice rang out, stronger then the other.
"So you will embark on another struggle, just to keep living, to keep suffering" as soon as the words left her mouth, the spirit looked shocked and covered her mouth, as if she had just said the most horrible thing. The other woman looked at her, impassive and one of them said.
"Did she just show an emotion?"
"She just asked a question"
"I am not sure, I do not bear in mind what feeling is"
"We do not have our own memory, so you can not remember"
"You choose to leave FeaTaur" One of them said, while the others kept talking in low, hushed voices that were starting to fill fear. If they had known what fear was, they would have been terrified.
"Ye….yes I do" Feavair said determined.
"You will not find your way out"
"Even if you do, half your spirit is gone and the light inside you has forever been tainted by darkness. You will keep on living an immortal life, weaker then humans and infected by disease like we were."
"You don't know that, I will…..I have walked far to reach my death, I will walk father to reach life" and with that she started to walk quickly away from the spirits.
' If they don't know what emotions is, how can they know what harmony is.
The answer seemed obvious. Spirits float around in peace. Peace is also an emotion, but since they know nothing else, no other emotion to compare them with, it is nothing else then existence for them.
She walked for what seemed like forever, but just a few seconds as well. The forest seemed to be the same, the trees seemed all alike and around her the spirits glowed silently. It was peaceful to know that the dead indeed found peace and rest. It was more disturbing to know that as soon as they were forgotten they were nothing.
She was still between dark vegetation; her toes were tickled by shadowy grass and above the trees, stars shone. What had happened before she woke up here? They had been inside the mountain, he had said he loved her, Boromir had jumped and…then the mountain had crumbled down over them.
Had Legolas survived, or was he here, somewhere in this forest. How would she be able to find him?
She felt eyes start to water and her body filled with dread. Had she chosen wrong, should she have embraced what they had offered? Now she was wandering aimlessly through a forest like a ghost.
Her body started to tremble and she slowly sat down on rock, there she hid her head in her hands and she cried.
"So am I dead?" Legolas asked as he stared at the six glowing forms in front of him. He had woken up, and all he could see was this forest and he walked around, mesmerized by the beauty and the sense of peace that settled over him, he felt at home here. Then he had remembered Feavair.
"Yes" one of them said.
"And no" the other answered.
"Right" Legolas said bitterly. He tried to get some sense of these…ghost or whatever they were, but they seemed to have a problem giving straight answers.
"A part of you is dead, and a part of you chose to live"
"So what am I suppose to do?" he asked slowly.
"You are given a choice"
"To embrace your peace, leave your emotions and suffering."
"Or you can go back to the world, keep living, keep suffering"
"Who are you?" he asked slowly.
"We are the Spirit Weavers," one of them said dully. Legolas felt his heart jolt and he spun around searching for Feavair.
"What about Feavair have you meet her? Is she here?" he asked.
"Our sister has left us. She is trying to find her way out of this forest, but she is lost. She will always be lost"
"She is here, somewhere in this forest? Right then, I will just leave you and find her!"
"Even if you find her and bring her out of this forest, she has been eternally weaken.
The one who had displayed emotions earlier, since there were only the presence and no past, it was not earlier, just an older now.
"What is this emotion they fight for, why do they struggle so to find each other?" She gasped again, as she realized she had once again done this strange thing. The others turned their head slowly and stared at her.
"Did she just show an emotion?"
"She just asked a question"
"I am not sure, I do not bear in mind what feeling is"
"We do not have our own memory, so you can not remember"
"They are disturbing us. Their emotions are to strong"
As the spirits started to talk in low hushed voices, Legolas started to slowly back away. When he was sure they could no longer see him he started to run. He was not sure what had just happened, but he was sure he did not want to become a part of it.
She is lost, here, somewhere. I must find here, and then we need to find a way out of this place.
He had no idea how long he ran, but his body started to tire and his breath ragged in his lounges. He slowed down and started to walk. It seemed like he just kept walking in a circle, all the trees seemed the same, and he could not find any traces of her. Around him, the orbs floated and glowed silently in the darkness, in a brilliant display of colours.
Suddenly, he saw a bluish white shine among the others. Not knowing why, he started to walk towards it. As the light grew, he could hear the gentle sound of someone crying. And then suddenly, she was in front of him.
She was different from when he had seen her inside the mountain. Gone were all the scars, and her tattern clothes. In stead, she was dressed in a brilliant white dress; her skin was smooth and pale. Her face was hidden in her ebony hair.
He spoke her name softly, afraid to startle her, afraid if she would break. As she heard her name whispered she raised her gaze and meet his. He stood still, not sure what to do or say.
"Legolas, nai ta lle" (Legolas, is that you?)
He could do nothing else then nod, and then she flung her self in his arms. He took a deep breath before he wrapped his arms around her waist, and they stood like that while the spirits floated around them. Her head was buried in the crock of his neck, and she was silent for along time before she whispered.
"Amin hiraetha"
She could feel him sake his head, before he echoed her statement. There were so many things he wanted to tell her, needed to tell her, but he had no idea how to find the words. So instead, he repeated her words.
"Amin hiraetha….I should have honored my promise…."
She closed her eyes as she felt his body take a deep and raggedy breath. It was strange how the stars had changed, how they were together, in the end. She could not put words on the passion that raged inside her. She opened her eyes, and stared at the spirits around them. They seemed unease, some were drawing nearer them, and some backed away.
Then slowly, one by one, the spirits started to approach them, and stopped only inches away.
She heard him continue to talk, but could not hear his words, she just stared at the lights bobbing up and down, some of the flickering. It did not seem right. The buzzing grew louder and the lights drew nearer them. He was still talking, but the words meant so little, the words were wrong spoken here, so she silenced him with a kiss.
"Amin mela'lle" she whispered against his lips.
"Amin mela'lle"And then, the world returned.
The Spirit Weavers stood still in the forest, experience what had just happened, or what was happening in the presence. The two lovers faded away, and the uneasy spirits floated around, not sure what to do, until they slowly started to settle down.
"There to many emotions" one of them said.
"We could have spared them for the emotions that will hurt them in the future" another continued
"They did not want to be spared. They wanted to fight, they will have to fight for their life"
"She could have been safe here, she should have been safe here. We could have stopped him from finding her, from unleashing the darkness."
"She was safe with him"
"This love…..it is such a strong word"
"No, it is a strong emotion"
Thank you for reading, and thanks for your review.