Chapter 18: The Familiar Reflection, that looks so different

Abby rubbed her eyes, aggressively groaning at the time the clock displayed. If this was Carter she was going to kill him. Reluctantly she got up, spending several minutes finding a dressing gown before finally getting to the door. She pulled it around her doing it up tightly in a knot before opening the door.

The cold gushed in, making Abby shiver. She grimaced at the tall figure in front of her. He was huddled up to keep himself warm and was holding his long dark coat as close to his body as he could manage. Abby managed a smile as she felt her stomach lunge and her heart start to race.

Luka turned to face Abby, not even bothering to force a smile. He nodded in acknowledgement of her presence, realising how bad he must look. He had deep, dark circles under his eyes and his cheeks were stained with tears. Yet Abby seemed surprisingly pleased to see him, even at this ridiculous hour.

She smiled at him, stepping back and opened the door fully, before ushering him in.

What happened?

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Susan stared at the unfamiliar reflected that glared back at her in the mirror. She put a hand up to touch her face, yelping with the pain. Her eye was double the normal size and rapidly turning black. Her face was covered in tiny cuts and her cheekbone was bruised. She shuddered at the memory of Abby coming into the ER like this several months earlier, if Susan had only known how she had felt.

She slammed on the shower, resisting the urge to be sick as she thought back to the events of the last few hours. The water beat hard on her back as she finally began to be cleansed. She could still smell him on her skin and she grabbed the shower gel, squeezing the remainder of the bottle all over her skin. She rubbed hard, trying desperately to rub him off her.

His smell still managed to find it's way into her nostrils and she scrubbed harder and harder, eventually making herself bleed. She stopped at the sight of her own blood. Feeling light-headed she rested her head against the wall, beginning to sob.

Climbing out of the shower she wrapped herself in the biggest towel she could find, avoiding the mirror, she couldn't bare to look at herself. At where he had touched her, kissed her, even where he had breathed on her.

The harsh bright lights of the living room made her blink furiously. She forced herself not to cry, trying to make herself believe that this was going to work. It was going to be okay. She stood still, not knowing where to turn. She glanced over at the phone and bent to pick it up. Gasping at the pain she stood back up, clutching her rib cage. She gulped realising she had to go to hospital. Shaking her head and hanging it low against her chest she realised she couldn't get there herself.

Staring at the phone hard she tried to decide who to call. Luka certainly wouldn't take her calls, she wouldn't feel comfortable with any other man and Chloe was too far away. Her only thought was Abby. Dialling the number she shook as she listened to the rings. Finally Abby's voice came through. Susan slammed down the phone, not being able to bring herself to speak to Abby. She began to sob once again, falling to the floor. She sobbed harder, curling herself up into a little ball and closing her eyes, trying desperately to destroy the images floating around in her head.


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I don't trust him Abby. Luka shook his head, staring into his mug of coffee. I just don't trust him.

Well she obviously does. Abby sighed.

Luka shook his head at her comment, dismissing it immediately. She doesn't love him Abby. I could see it in her eyes. She just, jesus, she just didn't know what to do. He smirked, realising she could be right. I don't care if she loves me or not. That's not important to me. I just want her to be safe.

Luka- she'll be fine. Abby leant forward, overlapping his hand with hers. Susan's a big girl, she can look after herself.

You don't understand. This guy, he scared me Abby. Luka sighed. There was just something in his eyes I didn't trust.

Abby smiled, squeezing Luka's hand tightly. Realising how much she missed him. Abby missed it all. Being the one he was always trying to protect was the thing she missed the most, that role had obviously been passed onto Susan now. Abby shuddered at the mention of Susan name. How could she have thrown Luka away? She laughed under her breath and the stupidity of her comment. You threw him away Abby- YOU threw him away...

Suddenly her phone began to sing and dance, vibrating across the table. Luka didn't notice, lost in thought of his own. She smiled, desperately hoping he was going to be okay. She couldn't believe Susan had done this too him. She flipped open the phone, not even bothering to look at who was calling, she knew it would be Carter.



Luka looked up at the sound of Abby's voice, realising she was on the phone he went back to looking back into his coffee mug and began to once again become lost in his thoughts. He heard the sound of Abby saying good-bye and looked up to her, wondering if he should leave. He was puzzled by her pained expression.

What's wrong?

Oh my god. Abby thumped down into the seat, not able to move.

What's wrong Abby? Luka paused. Was it Carter? Abby shook her head.

No, no. Oh God Luka, it was Susan.

Luka's mind began to buzz with worry. A million thoughts of pain and hurting flashed through his mind. He pictured Dix's smug face and dirty grin and began to panic.

What's wrong Abby, what's happened? Abby covered her mouth with her hand, shaking her head in shock. Finally she looked up, meeting Luka's questioning eyes.

She's been raped Luka.

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