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I sat in the kitchen with Bruce and Alfred, who puttered about. I took a sip of tea, and returned to the Wall Street Journal. Bruce was reading the Gotham Post's style section, when Sheila came in. I glanced at her, and smiled sweetly.
"Have a good day at work?" Bruce asked over the paper.
"Getting in late on a Monday? No, I didn't." she replied.
"Being able to sleep in was pleasant, I admit." Bruce replied. "Still, I'm a bit stiff, and I could use a workout. Selina, would you and Sheila like to join me downstairs?"
"That sounds like just the ticket for all of us, Master Bruce." Alfred said. "Give me a moment to change, and I shall join you and the ladies downstairs. If you will excuse me?"
I folded the paper neatly, and smiled at Bruce and Sheila. "Count me in! I could use a bit of stress relief. How about you, Sheila?"
"Um. I guess so. A light workout would be good, before dinner."
"Excellent!" Bruce said with a smile. "See you both downstairs in a few minutes."
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I knocked on Sheila's door, and said, "You ready?"
"Come in, Selina, and help!" Sheila answered.
"Help?" I asked, as I opened the door.
"Help." She answered, as I leaned against the door, regarding her. She had changed to a sport bra and a pair of panties, and then sat on the bed, looking at her dresser. She added, "What do you wear for a workout with Batman?"
"Well, first of all, unless we're in costume, it's Bruce and Selina." I replied. "The B-word is not spoken above the sub-basement, at least by those of us living here, like you. Secondly, you can see what I'm wearing." I twirled to show off my own midnight black unitard and white shoes. The red scrunchy that held my hair in a ponytail bounced as I moved. I continued, "May I?" I asked, motioning to her dresser. She nodded, and I moved to poke about through it. I pulled out a pair of gray shorts and a magenta leotard with gold stripes, and tossed them to her. I added, "This is just like any other workout. We'll be there to spot for you. The only difference is the location, and a bit of the equipment, which is *not* found in your average neighborhood gym." I waited for her to finish tying her shoes, and then said, "Follow me."
I walked into the library, and, followed by Sheila, crossed to the bookcases. I strolled along them, and selected a book, pulling it out. The bookcase rotated open, and I ushered Sheila through it, the bookcase rotating closed behind us. I took Sheila's elbow, and said as a dim red light came on in the narrow passageway, "Come on." I stopped at a rough stone wall, plain except for a small black scanner. I placed my hand on it, lights flickered across it, and a door slid noiselessly back. I stepped into the opening, lit only by a dim red light, followed by Sheila.
A minute later, the door opened, and we exited into a side passage off the main cave. I mentioned, "That old iron spiral staircase dates back to the 1600's, when the manor was first built. You noticed the sockets for torches? This cave was used as part of the Underground Railroad back in the 1800's."
"Is there any sort of … map to the complex?" Sheila asked.
I shook my head, and tapped my temple. "All up here. Alfred, Nightwing, and myself are the only ones that know it all. Oracle has been here a few times, as have other people, like Superman and a couple of the League. Here, you may find this interesting." I stopped, and turned down a side corridor into a small room. The lights came on, revealing some strange equipment. I mentioned, "Superman will come here sometimes to work out. This part of the cave is on solid bedrock. It has to be, to support this equipment. Weights, bench press, and so forth, all of it is variably adjustable for him." I stepped over to the bench press, and glanced at it. I tapped it, and mentioned, "This is set for 100 kt." Sheila blinked, so I clarified myself. "One hundred kilotons. Come on."
I strolled along, with Sheila tagging along. I stopped, and pointed out the Memorial Gallery and the Trophy room. Sheila pointed and asked, "What's down there?"
I glanced at the telltales for the defensive fields, and then finally said, "Weapons vault."
"Oh. Isn't it a little … overprotected?"
I looked at her with the best 'Bat' glare I had, and levelly said, "I don't think so. There's kryptonite in there."
Sheila's mouth fell open, and she stammered, "K … kryptonite?" She swallowed, and asked, "I don't think I want to know."
I started walking again, and said over my shoulder, "You don't." I turned to face her, and added, "Would you trust this government, or any of them, with that kind of power? The power to kill Superman? Would you trust anyone but yourself?" I looked at her face, and nodded. "I thought not." I pulled open a door, and said, "Here we are. The gym."
I pointed, and said, "Locker rooms and showers are through there, as is the Costume Vault." I spoke to the computer, and said, "Addition to authorized access list. Hawking, Sheila. General cave and gym complex only. Authorization Kyle, Selina. Passphrase Stalk, Catspaw, Whiskers."
"Authorization accepted. Access list modified." The computer replied.
"Thanks. What happens if I go someplace that I'm not authorized?" Sheila asked.
"Try it." I waved at the door.
"Maybe later." Sheila swallowed, and said, "Um, should I be seeing this?"
I moved over to a tiny glassed-in room, and saw Bruce spotting for Alfred. I turned, and told Sheila with a small smile, "Yes, you should. Welcome to the bat-family. One of the requirements is that everyone is in top condition. By the time we're through with you, you'll be pacing Bruce on his runs. This is an introduction to the exercise computer, although Nightwing nicknamed it 'Zogger'." I motioned to a laser-printed sign that was taped to the wall. It said, 'Zogger. Abandon hope!' I motioned to Sheila, and she squeezed in next to Bruce. He smiled at her, and then returned his attention to the window.
I squeezed in behind Sheila, and said softly, "Alfred is running at level two. This monitor shows what he's seeing; the window shows his actual movements. All the sessions are recorded for later analysis." I glanced at the window, and then motioned Sheila out. I moved a few meters away, and continued. "The exercise computer creates a 3D holofield of a combat simulation. It's as real as, well, the real thing. As you saw, Alfred was dealing with a few street muggers. We go easy on him because of his age. Your first time through, we'll set the computer for something just as easy for you."
I continued, "If you need to stop it, call out quickly 'StopStopStop', or hit the big red button on the control panel. Also, you can and probably will be injured in Zogger. Your objective is to disable your opponents, without killing them. If you kill an opponent, you'll get more of them. How many more, and how they're armed, depends on your skill level, and Zogger's setting. Your opponents will try to kill you, however. If they succeed in landing a fatal blow, you'll be alive, but injured." I pulled down my left shoulder strap, and showed Sheila an angry red scar, in my side next to my heart. I mentioned, "That was from my first Zogger session as Selina, instead of as Bruce. It still hurts. Harley got a little too close with a knife on that one."
A buzzer sounded, and the door opened. Alfred opened the door, and almost immediately collapsed onto a bench next to the door. Bruce handed him a towel. I smiled at Sheila, and Alfred said, "Good luck, Ms. Hawking." She swallowed, and nodded to him. I motioned her in, and with a deep breath, she entered the chamber.
I moved into the control room, and adjusted the headset. I tapped a switch, and said, "Calibration, Sheila. Can you hear me?" She nodded, and I said, "Verbally, please. Also, please say the stop phrase for the computer."
"Yes, Selina, I hear you." She took a breath, and added, "StopStopStop!"
I nodded. "Good, Sheila. See the red stop button?" She nodded, and I continued. "The computer will provide you with appropriate clothing and equipment for the scenario. Are you ready?" She swallowed again, and nodded. I clicked off the mike, and chose a scenario.
Bruce came in, and I told
him, "She's in good shape, U.S. Marine and all that. I think she could
handle level five to start with."
He asked, "Alfred does what? Level three on a good day?"
"So?" I asked.
He shook his head, "Nothing. Just making an observation. Level five
it is." He started to key in the settings, and I watched as Sheila morphed
into Batgirl, standing outside an alleyway. She jumped as a scream sounded in
the darkness.
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The buzzer sounded, and the door opened. Sheila staggered out, drenched with sweat. She collapsed on the bench, and said, "Oh. My. God." I disconnected my headset, and grabbed a towel, tossing it to her. She toweled off her face, then put it over her neck, and said, "What level was that, twenty?"
I shook my head, and said, "No, level five. We figured you could handle it. Not bad, though."
"They kept coming, though! More and more gang members! I didn't know the Dragons had that many!"
"There were five to start with." Bruce said. "You managed to kill one, which brought reinforcements. You then crippled another, which triggered another gang member. However, you survived odds of eight to one, which isn't bad for your first time." Sheila looked at him, and he added, "The Dragon's actual strength is fifteen, with sixteen assorted girlfriends. They're a small gang, for Gotham."
I smiled. "Bruce, rerun the exact same scenario for me, would you? Sheila, would you like to watch?"
"Oh, yeah!" She said, as I pulled open the door.
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Zogger's interior dissolved, and I was Batgirl. I heard a scream, and entered the alleyway. My boot heels made no noise. Another scream, and cursing in Japanese. I shook my head, and using the pressure points on the neck, dropped the two sentries. They were watching the rest of the gang rape the two girls, and not paying much attention to their surroundings. I crept up to a few feet away, then said, "They're not really a challenge, boys. Why don't you try a real woman?"
"Kusu o taberu na, ama! (Eat fucking shit, bitch!)" One said, as he turned to me. "Chikushoo! (Oh, Fuck!)" He made a move to remove himself from the girl, who took this opportunity to fight back, by biting and scratching. He screamed, and I twisted his arm, dislocating it. He screamed again, and that woke his two remaining gang members to action. One tried to pull up his pants from where he had shoved a girl against an alley wall, and the other tried to pull out a gun. I kicked it out of his hand, then chopped his neck. He dropped, and the other tried to run. His victim screamed, and raked his face with her nails, and he swore, and tripped over his pants. I touched the pressure point on his neck, then turned back to the leader. He tried an awkward, left handed swing at me, and I smiled, and broke his arm. He glared, and charged me, and I laid him out with a right cross. He crumpled onto the dirty pavement.
I smiled, and said, "Would you ladies help me drag them out to the street, so they'll be handy for the cops?" The buzzer sounded, and the scene dissolved.
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"Oh, wow! That was awesome!" Sheila said.
I grinned at her, and said, "Know what you did wrong?"
"I think. Minimum force?" Sheila continued, "Those guys just stared at you, Selina. How do you do that?"
"It's minimum EFFECTIVE force, though. It's partially the reputation, partly shock." I said. "You're prepared for it, they're not expecting to see a Bat. It can give you several valuable seconds. You also tried to fight your way out with weapons that you're not familiar with. We'll address that, but you also need to be ready to fight your way out when you're stripped to the skin. How are you on martial arts?"
"Rusty. I've taken judo with women's defensive classes, and I practiced tae-kwon-do when I was on active duty with the Corps." Sheila smiled, and added; "Pushing papers in a courtroom isn't a very active lifestyle."
"Well, we'll have to see about that." I said. "Pick your sparring partner. Any one of the three of us."
"Even Alfred?" Sheila asked.
"I am still an honorary member of His Majesty's Special Air Service, miss." Alfred replied. "I am ready to, as the phrase goes, 'kick your patootie', young lady."
"He's a sneaky, cunning bahstard." I said with a smile, giving it a British pronunciation. "Be careful with him. Bruce and I still aren't at a hundred percent after our little … accident. You might have better luck with us."
Bruce added, "Zogger can also be used in a 'dojo' mode."
"Joy. Let's see. Eenie, Meeny, Miney. Oh, the heck with it. Selina, wanna spar with me?"
"Hey, what about me?" I heard.
"Hello, Dick." Bruce said. Dick strolled up, and smiled at Sheila. She smiled at him, and Bruce coughed, and said, "Sheila Hawking, this is Dick Grayson."
"Pleased, I'm sure." Dick said, holding out his hand. He glanced at Bruce and I, and asked, "New member of the family?"
"For the moment. Sheila knows who we are, obviously. This is her first workout with us."
"Cool." Dick said. "How'd she do with good ol' Zogger?"
"Not bad at all." I said. "Her first time, she managed to beat off eight Dragons on level five."
Dick winced, and said, "Killed one, eh? How'd the victims do?" Sheila shook her head, and Dick winced in sympathy again, and patted her shoulder. "Don't worry about it. You'll get better at it."
"I hope so." Sheila drew a deep breath, and asked, "Your sparring offer still open?"
Dick grinned, and said, "Sure. Half a sec while I change?"
### Chapter 22: Of Workouts and Zogger
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