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Alfred was waiting for us as we pulled into the cave. He rushed over to me, and helped me out of the car like I was some invalid. I looked at him strangely, and said, "Thank you, Alfred. I'm fine. I'm going to shower and change, and then grab a few hours of sleep before going in to work."
Alfred released me, and with an insulted air, said, "As you wish, Miss Selina. Unless you require further of my services, I shall be upstairs. Good evening." He turned, and strode off.
"What did I say?" I asked Bruce. He shrugged, and moved off toward the costume vault.
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"It's six a.m. on October 28th, and it's a good, chilly Tuesday morning to everyone from Gotham's oldies station, WGHO! I'm Shawna Foxx; getting you up and out of your cozy den, so get your paw off that snooze button! I'll be here with you till ten, but now we've got Alex with the early morning traffic report." I slapped the snooze button, yawned, and dragged myself out of the warm blankets, then stretched and walked into the bathroom.
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"Good morning, everyone!" I said as I walked into the kitchen. I dropped my things next to the door, and then poured a cup of hot tea for myself, waving the pot at Alfred, who shook his head.
Sheila came in after me, dropping her briefcase and purse next to my purse and gym bag, and making a beeline for the coffeepot. She took a slurp, sighed, and asked me, "How can you be so perky after being out until, what?"
"We got in at two, it was a slow night. Dibs on the financial section." I said. Bruce stood up and headed for the coffeepot, and I intercepted him, grabbing the pot first. I shooed him back to the kitchen table, and added for Sheila's benefit, "You don't let Bruce do ANYTHING in the kitchen, Sheila." I saw a spark of feminism light up in her eyes, and added, "It's not a male/female thing; it's just that he's … not so handy in the kitchen."
"Nor were you, Miss Selina." Alfred reminded me.
I nodded. "Speaking of handy, I want to redesign my, err, Selina's catsuit. It's driving me crazy not having a belt." I asked Sheila, "Want to join me tonight in the costume vault? This is another neat little bit of alien tech we've got."
"Sounds like fun, but how did you know I like to sew?" she asked as she stood up, and helped Alfred distribute the omelets.
"I saw the sewing machine and supplies in your bedroom. You've also got embroidery and needlepoint materials." I replied as I carried the plates of sausages and toast triangles to the table.
"Oh." Sheila changed the subject. "With all the technology around here, I would think you'd have some sort of fancy food replicator gizmo." Sheila joked.
"Certainly NOT." Alfred said with a sniff. "I won't have one of those infernal contraptions!"
Sheila blinked, and said, "They exist?"
"Of course they do. There are some in the JLA watchtower." I said with a straight face, "However, we're just a typical, normal family. Why would we have one?" That got some chuckles as everyone dug into their breakfast.
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"Thank you for calling." I said. I leaned back in my chair, and stretched. I looked over at Helen, and said, "I owe you one, if you want to take off a bit early for lunch, and I'll cover for you."
Helen said, "Thanks! My boyfriend is picking me up and … " She waggled her eyebrows, and Clarissa chuckled. Helen quickly ducked into the closet, and I smiled.
"So, you gonna get dressed up on Friday?" Clarissa asked. I glanced at her, and she explained, "It's like, a tradition. Closest day to Halloween, you come in costume, and people judge you during the day with a secret ballot. Winner gets some booze and other prizes. If you can't dress up during the day because you've got court, you change after work. We have a party after work with a costume contest. It's a lot of fun. There was a notice was on the lunchroom wall, you must have seen it."
"I think I can come up with something." I said with a smile. The phone rang, and I touched the right button. "Legal Aid Office, how may I direct your call?"
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I knocked on Sheila's door. I heard her call "Come in!" and I entered to see her typing on her laptop. She had on shorts, a t-shirt, and ankle socks, with her hair twisted up in a bun. I smiled, and asked, "I hope there's nothing in there about your experiences downstairs."
"Take a look." she offered with a glare, standing up and walking away.
I walked over to an armchair, bypassing her laptop, and sat. "Sorry. I think you realize the dangers of having any mention of the 'sub-basement', or it's occupants." I said.
Sheila nodded, and I found some tennis shoes on the floor, and handed them to her. "C'mon. I wasn't kidding about redesigning my catsuit, and I thought you'd like to see this system."
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We entered the upstairs library again, and I touched a book. I looked at Sheila, and said, "The book is 'Of Mice and Men', by Steinbeck. Just tilt it back about thirty degrees." I did so, and the passageway opened up. I motioned her through.
"What if you actually wanted to read the book?" Sheila asked.
"Just pull it straight out." I answered. I took Sheila's elbow, and said as a dim red light came on in the narrow passageway, "Come on." I stopped at the wall, and motioned at the scanner, and said, "Just put your palm against it." She did so, lights blinked, and a door slid noiselessly back. I stepped into the opening, lit only by a dim red light, followed by Sheila. I walked down the old circular iron staircase, followed silently by Sheila.
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I walked into the costume vault, and stopped in the middle. I pointed, and said, "Each person has a collection of costumes for different situations. Let me show you Batgirl's." I opened the door, and showed the assortment of unitards, boots, and capes. I closed the Batgirl door, and added, "Everyone's costume specifications are stored in the computer, along with body specifications." I pointed down a short corridor, and said, "The rouge's costumes are through there, if one of them had to be impersonated. Those costumes are primarily from raids and confiscation from the various hideouts. Because Batman's a much bigger person than Scarecrow or Joker, those costumes are there primarily for study. That's where Catwoman's costumes are stored."
Sheila asked, "Is it legal to keep their equipment and costumes?"
I shrugged, and said; "Jim … Commissioner Gordon once said that I broke several laws just by going out every night. I think of it as the 'greater good'. That's why I leave prostitutes and bookies alone, as long as they stay away from guns and drugs. They're good sources of intelligence on my enemies, and they like having my protection against some of their more unruly clients."
I turned, and told Sheila, "The first thing we need to do is to update my body specifications, and while we're at it, we might as well add yours in. I hope you don't mind a bit of nudity. The computer will add in undergarments and armor, and the tighter a garment is, the better its range of motion, so for that, you can't have any clothing on for the scan. Besides, on all those skin-tight costumes you see people wear, did you ever see bra or panty lines?" I walked over to a console, and placed my palm on the scanner. I told it, "Update body scan. Kyle, Selina." I took a pair of protective goggles, and disappeared behind a folding Japanese screen. I pulled off my clothes, and put them on a small table. I called out, "Besides, it's a silly phobia. I'm proud of my body. We'll do you next."
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I walked out, pulling my hair into a ponytail. I smiled at Sheila, and said, "Ready?"
"Um, sure. Why am I doing this?" she asked as she took the goggles I handed her.
"Well, you're part of the family now. We might as well get the data. You never know when it might come in handy. There's no such thing as too much information." I said. "Besides, you saw my own scan on the display. It doesn't hurt, and all you have to do is to move around on the platform. Dance, kick box, do your katas, whatever, all you have to do is give the computer a full range of motion. It will chime when it has enough, and then you can get dressed."
Sheila nodded, and vanished behind the screen. I told the computer, "New body scan. Hawking, Sheila." It beeped, and I called, "When you're ready, put the goggles on, and step on the platform. You'll see a blue light, that's the mapping beam. Start dancing, and stop when it chimes. I'll be out here waiting for you."
I heard the chime, and called, "That didn't hurt, did it? Get dressed and come on out. Leave the goggles on the table." I tapped keys to configure her settings.
Sheila joined me in a minute, and asked, "Now what?"
"I've updated your presets a bit. The women's breast support is a little weak, so I modify it for better support and lift. The men add in additional armor in the crotch." I eyed her, and grinned. "Want an additional cup size or two? It helps to disguise you, and we can do it here. Now we can outfit you in just about anything. I've entered your file here, and here is either a generic white costume, or we can build a custom one." I eyed her, and said, "Want to see what you'd look like as Supergirl?"
Sheila grinned, and I touched a few keys. A solid looking hologram appeared on a small stage, and Sheila walked around it. I grinned, and changed the settings to Batgirl, then a Green Lantern. I said, "You wouldn't get an actual Oan power ring and lantern, of course. They're kind of scarce."
"That would be cool for our Halloween party." Sheila said. "Can you change things?"
"Sure. That's one reason I wanted to come down here tonight." I said. "I've been invited to one, and I wasn't sure if I wanted to wear my Catwoman outfit." I brought up a menu, and showed her how to change different parts of the outfit. I added, "You can build underwear and armor into the costume too. Batgirl has a 24-inch waist, the bitch, which I can't get without a corset. You can add it in with this system, and save the costume, too. Later, when you're old and fat, it will modify it to the latest body scans." I moved to another terminal, and pulled up my scan, and the Catwoman costume. I started to play with equipment belts, but none of them worked with the costume. The only one that did was more costume jewelry than a useful belt. I sighed, and muttered in frustration, "Dammit." I added, "Sorry I'm bitchy. I don't know what's wrong with me."
Sheila glanced at me, then said, "Don't worry about it. We all have days like that. By the way, one of my co-workers took pictures of Ivy's, um, street decorations from the other night. I asked her to make me a set, as the 'victim'."
"How are you handling that little, ah, conflict of interest?" I asked.
"As a victim of one of their crimes, I can hardly represent them in court. Since I'm a partner, nor can anyone from my firm. I filed motions of recusal for both myself and for my firm." She grinned, and added, "I really didn't want to represent them anyway. Let the PD's office handle them."
"Works for me." I said. I looked at the costume she produced, and asked, "Want to try it on? Hit that oblong yellowish button, and it will be replicated in that tray over there."
The replicator hummed, and Sheila turned to look at me. She asked, "Still trying to find a belt? Why don't you go out as Batgirl?"
"Well, because I'm Catwoman." I answered.
"Are you? Why don't you try it as Batgirl? Seems like you're 'neither fish nor fowl'. You're you, Selina. Not Bruce anymore, and not Catwoman completely, either." She moved to collect her costume, and moved behind the screen.
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"It's six a.m. and a frosty, frozen Wednesday the 29th to everyone from Gotham's oldies station, WGHO! Remember, only two days to go till Halloween! I'm Shawna Foxx; getting you up and out of your cozy den, so get your paw off that snooze button! I'll be here with you till ten, and we'll talk about costumes and Halloween parties later on. Now, we've got Alex with the early morning traffic report." I slapped the snooze button, yawned, and dragged myself out of the warm blankets, then stretched, turned, and made the bed. I stretched again, and walked into the bathroom.
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"Good morning, everyone!" I said with a smile as I walked into the kitchen. I poured myself a cup of tea, and refilled Alfred's cup at his gesture. Sheila topped off Bruce's, and then poured a cup of coffee for herself. "So, what's everyone doing today?" I asked.
"I've got my first Board meeting today." Bruce said. "I wish you could do it, Selina."
"Office conferences with clients all day. You'd think with what people are paying me; they'd actually show up for some of these. Well, I get paid if they show up or not." Sheila said philosophically.
"You have an eleven o'clock appointment with Dr. Phillips tomorrow." Alfred reminded me.
"Who's that?" I asked, taking a sip of tea.
"Your OB. Your first GYN exam, 'Selina'." Bruce said with a grin.
Sheila had just taken a swallow of coffee, and some spilled onto her blouse as she choked back a laugh. She put her cup down, and sat down, her head back as she laughed.
"If you give me that blouse right away, I shall clean the stain for you." Alfred told her.
Sheila nodded, stood up, and said, "Thank you, Alfred. Excuse me, everyone." She left to put on another blouse, still chuckling.
"What's so funny?" I asked. "It's a doctor's visit."
"It's an OB. That's what's funny." Said Bruce. He didn't elaborate, and Alfred simply raised his eyebrow.
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I knocked on Mrs. Harris' office doorframe, and asked, "Got a minute?"
"Certainly, Selina. Please come in." my supervisor said.
"I apologize for the short notice, but I've got an 11:00 appointment tomorrow for my OB that I completely forgot about." I said.
"That's quite all right. One of those things we need to endure." She typed something into her terminal, and said, "All right, I've got you scheduled off tomorrow. If yours is anything like mine, you'll be there for a while. I like to take my needlepoint. Don't forget to tell Clarissa and Helen."
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I put my things in the closet, and sat down at my desk. I waited until both Clarissa and Helen were off the phone, and said, "Sorry I'm late. I was with Mrs. Harris. I need to take tomorrow off."
"Anything wrong?" Helen asked.
"OB appointment tomorrow at eleven." I answered.
"Well, at least you can sleep in a bit." Clarissa said. "Who is it?"
"Dr. Phillips." I answered.
"Oh, I like him!" Helen answered. "He warms his instruments!"
"I'll have to make an appointment with him. Dr. Jorgensen's instruments are as frozen as her hands." Clarissa said. "Could you get some information about him for me, Selina?"
"Sure." My phone rang, and I touched the button. "Gotham Legal Aid. How may I direct your call?"
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### Chapter 23: Of Costumes and Caves