For disclaimers, please see Chapter 1.
***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***
"It's six a.m. on Sunday, November second, here at Gotham's hit oldies station, WGHO. I'm Patti King, your hostess with the mostest, here with you till noon."
I woke up, sloshing some water. Yawning, I reached behind me to drain the tub. I started to sit up, and was struck with intense pain in my pelvis. It felt like . someone was ripping open my lower abdomen. I let out a small gasp of pain and doubled over in the cold water. "Oh, god." I muttered. "I can handle this. It's just a cramp. Ignore it, get on with what you have to do." I sat up, and was rewarded with another spasm of pain. I exhaled, and forced myself to stand, and get out of the tub. I braced myself, and staggered over to sit on the toilet, legs shaking. After an endless few minutes, I was able to pull a towel down and start to dry myself with shaking hands.
"Meditation. That will control the pain." I told myself. I squeezed some water out of my hair, then staggered out of the bathroom into my bedroom. I debated putting some clothes on, but instead sank into a lotus position on the floor, and tried to center myself. I tried to focus on my breathing, but even that was painful. I groaned, and put my head in my hands.
"Selina?" A knock on the door. "Selina, it's Bruce. May I come in?"
"If you dare." I replied. He walked in, and I asked, "What can I do for you?"
"No, it's what I can do for you. You know, you're broadcasting what you're feeling. I'm just lucky enough to be able to pick it up." He grinned crookedly, and I groaned.
"What you're feeling, Selina, are cramps. I know you're not big on drugs, but they do work. Remember, I had them before you did. Another thing that works is a hot water bottle." He showed me one, and added, "Getting in late, then falling asleep in the tub, isn't good. Get into bed, put this on your pelvis, and take a nap." He tossed the bottle onto the bed, then disappeared into the bathroom, reappearing in a minute with a towel. I looked at him, and he mentioned, "For your hair, it's still wet."
"Thanks." I muttered. With shaking hands, I wrapped my hair, then tried to stand. I groaned, and collapsed back to the floor, and over to my back.
:: C'mon, Selina, you can do it. Every woman on the planet has to deal with cramps, you can too. :: I told myself as I glared at Bruce, who sighed, and picked me up, depositing me effortlessly onto the bed.
He pulled down the covers, maneuvered me into them, then tucked the hot water bottle on my pelvis. Pulling up the covers, he threw another blanket on me, then said, "I'll look in on you in an hour or so. Sleep well." I was already half asleep as the door clicked closed.
***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***
I yawned, and rolled over, looking at the clock. :: Eleven thirty! I need to get going! :: I threw back the covers, and noticed the cooled water bottle on my pelvis. I smiled to myself, :: Thank you, Bruce! :: and picked it up as I swiveled out of bed. I set it down as I turned to pull up the sheets to make the bed.
***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***
"Good morning, everyone!" I said as I walked into the kitchen.
"Good morning, Miss Selina." Alfred said. Sheila looked up from the table, and saluted me with her coffee mug, then returned to reading her case files. Alfred continued, "Are you feeling better? Master Bruce was very concerned."
"Yes, I am, old friend, and thank you, Sheila." I said, touching her shoulder. She looked up and nodded to me. "Where is Bruce?" I asked, as I poured a cup of tea.
"Master Bruce is in the sub-basement." Alfred replied.
"Ah. Thank you." I drained my tea, and said, "I'm going to join him." Alfred intercepted me on the way to the sink, and took the cup. I smiled at him, and padded out.
***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***
"Bruce?" I called as I stepped off Alfred's elevator.
"Over here, Selina." Bruce called from the computer. "I wanted to see what you had on Catwoman. It's truly amazing how much information you have on people."
"I wish I had more on some." I commented. I moved a chair near him, and said, "I'd like to talk to you for a minute."
He logged off, and turned to regard me. "What's on your mind?"
"Well, I'd . like to apologize for what I said in your office. This baby isn't all your fault, I was just as caught up in the moment as you were. I should have thought of protection, too." I smiled at him, and said, "Let's just chalk this one up to experience, shall we?"
"Good name for a kid: Experience Wayne" He grinned, and relaxed a bit.
"Does that mean you're going to make an 'honest woman' out of me, Mr. Wayne?" I quipped.
"I don't know if anyone could do that, Ms. Kyle." he shot back with a smile. "What are your plans?"
"I'll carry it to term." I said.
"Catholic upbringing." he said, exhaling. "I was worried."
"You shouldn't have been. Remember, the Bat never kills. For me, that includes this little monster." I patted my tummy, and smiled at him. He grinned, and I continued. "One other thing. I'm giving Sheila full access to the cave."
Bruce sat back in his chair, and steepled his fingers. "What about the weapons vault? I'm hesitant about giving her access to kryptonite and the other 'toys' you've got stashed in there."
"Hmf. Give her escorted access to the weapons vault, full access everywhere else." I told him.
"That works for me. I'll take care of it. Now, you, young lady. What have you had to eat today? Remember, you're eating for two, now." I felt a little . twist in my mind, and he grinned, and said, "I thought not. A cup of tea is not adequate nutrition. I'm sure that Alfred can come up with a proper meal for you." He made shooing motions at me.
"What about you, Mr. Wayne? What has your morning been like?" I glared at him, and reached out with my mind to his, looking about. "Four ounces of orange juice, then sitting on your butt here playing with the Cray. I'll go upstairs and eat if you will. Sheila could probably use some company for lunch."
***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***
Bruce and Alfred ate a 'Ploughman's lunch', while Sheila and I shared a chicken and vegetable casserole. We were finishing the dishes, when a key turned in the lock, and a young woman stomped in. She stopped to look at us, then demanded of Bruce, "Who's the bitch that's been using my name, and what the hell is Catwoman doing here?"
Bruce looked over the financial section of the Times as Alfred tisked, "Miss Brown. Language."
"Sorry, Alfred." She glared at Bruce, and insisted, "You're responsible for this! Who is she, and why is Catwoman here?"
"Both Ms. Hawking and Ms. Kyle are here at my invitation, Stephanie." Bruce said mildly.
Sheila dried her hands, and held out a hand. "Hello. I'm Sheila Hawking, and you are .?"
"Spoiler. The REAL Spoiler!" she spat.
"Miss Brown. Manners." Alfred reminded her.
"Sorry, Alfred." Stephanie said again. She turned to Bruce, and asked, "Why are they here?"
"I have my reasons, Stephanie." Bruce said. "If you have a problem with Ms. Hawking, you should take it downstairs."
Stephanie glared at Bruce, then told Sheila, "Zogger? I'll kick your butt, lady!"
"We'll see, child." Sheila smiled inscrutably.
I moved to the hidden elevator, and asked, "Ladies?"
***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***
We changed while Bruce set up Zogger in dojo mode. I pulled on a purple leotard over white tights, Sheila kept to her customary gray tights, gold shorts and magenta leotard, while Stephanie opted for a cranberry bodysuit and gray shorts.
Sheila left, and I thought about saying something, but decided not to. Stephanie was in no mood to talk.
***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***
The door hissed closed behind the two, and I joined Bruce in the control room. He asked, "Can everyone hear me?" They nodded, and he continued. "The rules are simple. No blows or holds that can kill or cripple. The fight is to first blood or last one standing. Understood?" They nodded again, and I rang a bell.
Sheila stopped in the center of the ring, and gave a traditional bow of respect. Stephanie replied with a spinning back kick which knocked her against the wall. Sheila stood, and said, "If that is how you wish to play it, child." Sheila turned, feinted, and landed a kick in Stephanie's gut.
"You bitch! That hurt!" Stephanie said, as Sheila circled.
"I am right here, child. I am waiting for you to kick my butt."
:: Sheila's playing the inscrutable Oriental. :: I thought to Bruce as I watched the two circle.
:: Messing with her head. :: he replied.
"Damn you, bitch!" Stephanie changed to karate, and managed to land a few blows.
I watched as both fighters stepped back, and took the other's measure after the initial exchanges. Sheila had patience and a bit more experience in the martial arts, but was out of practice. Stephanie, on the other hand, wasn't used to fighting in a dojo, but on the streets. She had speed and reflexes going for her, as well as more developed combat instincts. They circled a few more times, then Stephanie became impatient, and tried a flying side kick, which Sheila slid and twisted away from, landing a nice heel strike to Stephanie's pelvis, forcing her to crash down.
:: Five bucks on Sheila. Stephanie's just mad. She's not taking it seriously. :: I thought.
With a wordless cry of rage, Stephanie twisted up, and took another swing at Sheila.
:: Gambling is illegal in this state, you know. :: I turned and stuck my tongue out at him, and he added, :: That wasn't right of you to use her Spoiler identity without asking her. ::
:: She's the only one who wears a full-face mask. :: I thought. Sheila dodged another attack, got inside Stephanie's defenses, and landed a rapid series of blows. I thought, :: Nice combination, Sheila! ::
:: She's been practicing somewhere. Maybe at work. :: Bruce observed.
:: Undoubtedly a good stress relief from her clients. :: I observed cynically. Stephanie stepped back and shook her head to clear it. I triggered the hatch, and stepped between them. I gripped Stephanie, peeled back her eyelids, and asked her, "How many fingers am I holding up?"
"Um." She shook her head, and tried to focus. "Four?"
"Not quite. Two. If you don't call the fight, I will."
"Um." Stephanie shook her head again, and her knees wobbled. "Okay. 'Uncle'" She gazed at Sheila, who had rushed to support her other side, and asked, "Where'd you learn that?"
"Marine Corps." Sheila replied.
"Cool. Will you show it to me?"
"Sure. Once you're on your feet again."
***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***
"Feel better?" I asked Stephanie.
"Yeah, a bit better, thanks." She sat up from the bed in the medical bay, and looked over at Sheila. "I'm sorry I insulted you."
"You were understandably upset. I will develop my own persona as quickly as possible."
"Thanks. I appreciate it. I've worked hard for Spoiler."
"If you want to be mad at anyone, I'm the one that suggested she use Spoiler." I told Stephanie. I crossed my arms, and said, "What can we learn from this fight?"
"I got pissed, and just started swinging at her. I'm not really used to that kind of fight." Stephanie said.
"I retained my focus, but what do you mean by 'that kind of fight'?" Sheila asked.
"When you're out on the streets, the bad guys are going to try to kill you." I said. "Each of the bat family have a bounty on our heads, dead or alive. How do you think you'd do against Joker, or Ivy?"
"I don't know." Sheila looked at me, and said, "Perhaps I should find out."
***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***
The door closed behind Sheila, and I watched from the control booth. "Ready?" I called. "You'll have everything you need with you."
Sheila took a breath, then nodded, and said, "Let's do it."
I touched the enter key, and the scene morphed into the 23rd Street Metro station. Sheila was wearing a gray skirted business suit, pumps with a medium heel, and carrying a briefcase and a large purse. She stood in line, waiting for the train, when the doors leading up to the street from the platform suddenly rolled down. The security doors at the edge of the platform descended, locking in the morning commuters.
Through a door, the Joker entered, with his usual group of thugs. He announced himself with a burst of automatic fire and his trademark insane laugh. "Good morning, ladies and germs! It's MONDAAAAAY, and I've got a question for you! Why do you hate MONDAYS? It's the start of a whole new week!" He grabbed a young transit worker, and held a pistol with a long barrel to her ear. She closed her eyes and started to whisper a prayer. Joker slowly thumbed the hammer back, and said, "Don't you get it? A HOLE new week!" He squeezed the trigger, and a pointed rod slammed through her head, with a little yellow flag unfurling from the end that said "Bang!" He dropped her corpse, saying "Laugh! That was a great joke! I gotta MILLION OF 'EM!" The crowd screamed, and stampeded for the exits, pushing madly at the heavy steel grilles. I saw Sheila turn, and dash for the ladies' room.
A few minutes later, Batgirl left the ladies' room, making her way toward Joker. She glanced around, and saw a couple of cops working toward Joker. A goon spotted one, and shot him as people dived for the ground again. A citizen grabbed the fallen officer's gun, and returned fire, taking out the goon before being shot himself. Joker ignored the small firefight, concentrating on the twenty or so people he had collected with red hair kneeling before him with their hands on their heads. There was one tall, dark-skinned girl with reddish hair that he singled out, talking to her quietly, even shaking her hand, before motioning toward the doors. She took a step, then stiffened, and collapsed, the Smilex he had injected already making her skin pasty-white, with her hair turning green and her lips impossibly red. She twitched and lay still as Joker laughed.
Batgirl had made it to a large support column, behind which a cop sheltered. She whispered something to the young transit cop, who nodded. The cop aimed at the ceiling over Joker. The falling debris distracted him long enough for Batgirl to throw smoke and gas capsules, which allowed the pinned-down crowd to scramble toward the exits. Joker screamed "BATTY! YOU'RE HERE!". He wrenched a gun from a goon, and started firing blindly, as the hostages screamed and choked on the gas. Batgirl threw more smoke, and then threw a razor 'wing toward Joker's muzzle flashes. Joker yelled, "Ow! That hurt, Batty! Is that any way to treat a friend on his birthday?". He cackled again, then called, "Time to go, boys!" Batgirl tried to follow, but missed Joker, catching a goon from behind, then knocking out a following goon. The smoke started to clear, and Batgirl tried to open the locked door, finally using a explosive pellet on it. She ran down the corridor, only to hear Joker's laugh fade into the distance.
She re-emerged, to find the smoke dissipating. Batgirl made her way back to the ladies' room, and Sheila emerged a few minutes later, as the GCPD finally arrived, and the scene dissolved. Sheila staggered out, and collapsed on a bench. I tossed a towel to her, and said, "Not bad for your first time against the Joker."
Sheila looked up, and was drenched in sweat. She said, "God, that thing is realistic! I could smell the gas and the blood, and the look on their faces ." She shuddered, and said, "I'm glad he's locked up now."
"With Joker, you try to bag him before the body count gets too high. Yours was ." I checked the computer. " . thirty seven. Nice little distraction with the transit cop, but you try not to put others at risk like that."
"Better a cop than a civilian, though." Stephanie pointed out. "My first time, Joker managed to catch and kill me. You did good." Stephanie held out her hand to Sheila.
"Thanks." Sheila tossed the towel around her neck, and asked, "You want to help me with this new costume design?"
Stephanie grinned, and said, "I'd love to!" They headed off toward the costume vault. # 30: Of Enemies and Allies . ***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***
***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***
"It's six a.m. on Sunday, November second, here at Gotham's hit oldies station, WGHO. I'm Patti King, your hostess with the mostest, here with you till noon."
I woke up, sloshing some water. Yawning, I reached behind me to drain the tub. I started to sit up, and was struck with intense pain in my pelvis. It felt like . someone was ripping open my lower abdomen. I let out a small gasp of pain and doubled over in the cold water. "Oh, god." I muttered. "I can handle this. It's just a cramp. Ignore it, get on with what you have to do." I sat up, and was rewarded with another spasm of pain. I exhaled, and forced myself to stand, and get out of the tub. I braced myself, and staggered over to sit on the toilet, legs shaking. After an endless few minutes, I was able to pull a towel down and start to dry myself with shaking hands.
"Meditation. That will control the pain." I told myself. I squeezed some water out of my hair, then staggered out of the bathroom into my bedroom. I debated putting some clothes on, but instead sank into a lotus position on the floor, and tried to center myself. I tried to focus on my breathing, but even that was painful. I groaned, and put my head in my hands.
"Selina?" A knock on the door. "Selina, it's Bruce. May I come in?"
"If you dare." I replied. He walked in, and I asked, "What can I do for you?"
"No, it's what I can do for you. You know, you're broadcasting what you're feeling. I'm just lucky enough to be able to pick it up." He grinned crookedly, and I groaned.
"What you're feeling, Selina, are cramps. I know you're not big on drugs, but they do work. Remember, I had them before you did. Another thing that works is a hot water bottle." He showed me one, and added, "Getting in late, then falling asleep in the tub, isn't good. Get into bed, put this on your pelvis, and take a nap." He tossed the bottle onto the bed, then disappeared into the bathroom, reappearing in a minute with a towel. I looked at him, and he mentioned, "For your hair, it's still wet."
"Thanks." I muttered. With shaking hands, I wrapped my hair, then tried to stand. I groaned, and collapsed back to the floor, and over to my back.
:: C'mon, Selina, you can do it. Every woman on the planet has to deal with cramps, you can too. :: I told myself as I glared at Bruce, who sighed, and picked me up, depositing me effortlessly onto the bed.
He pulled down the covers, maneuvered me into them, then tucked the hot water bottle on my pelvis. Pulling up the covers, he threw another blanket on me, then said, "I'll look in on you in an hour or so. Sleep well." I was already half asleep as the door clicked closed.
***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***
I yawned, and rolled over, looking at the clock. :: Eleven thirty! I need to get going! :: I threw back the covers, and noticed the cooled water bottle on my pelvis. I smiled to myself, :: Thank you, Bruce! :: and picked it up as I swiveled out of bed. I set it down as I turned to pull up the sheets to make the bed.
***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***
"Good morning, everyone!" I said as I walked into the kitchen.
"Good morning, Miss Selina." Alfred said. Sheila looked up from the table, and saluted me with her coffee mug, then returned to reading her case files. Alfred continued, "Are you feeling better? Master Bruce was very concerned."
"Yes, I am, old friend, and thank you, Sheila." I said, touching her shoulder. She looked up and nodded to me. "Where is Bruce?" I asked, as I poured a cup of tea.
"Master Bruce is in the sub-basement." Alfred replied.
"Ah. Thank you." I drained my tea, and said, "I'm going to join him." Alfred intercepted me on the way to the sink, and took the cup. I smiled at him, and padded out.
***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***
"Bruce?" I called as I stepped off Alfred's elevator.
"Over here, Selina." Bruce called from the computer. "I wanted to see what you had on Catwoman. It's truly amazing how much information you have on people."
"I wish I had more on some." I commented. I moved a chair near him, and said, "I'd like to talk to you for a minute."
He logged off, and turned to regard me. "What's on your mind?"
"Well, I'd . like to apologize for what I said in your office. This baby isn't all your fault, I was just as caught up in the moment as you were. I should have thought of protection, too." I smiled at him, and said, "Let's just chalk this one up to experience, shall we?"
"Good name for a kid: Experience Wayne" He grinned, and relaxed a bit.
"Does that mean you're going to make an 'honest woman' out of me, Mr. Wayne?" I quipped.
"I don't know if anyone could do that, Ms. Kyle." he shot back with a smile. "What are your plans?"
"I'll carry it to term." I said.
"Catholic upbringing." he said, exhaling. "I was worried."
"You shouldn't have been. Remember, the Bat never kills. For me, that includes this little monster." I patted my tummy, and smiled at him. He grinned, and I continued. "One other thing. I'm giving Sheila full access to the cave."
Bruce sat back in his chair, and steepled his fingers. "What about the weapons vault? I'm hesitant about giving her access to kryptonite and the other 'toys' you've got stashed in there."
"Hmf. Give her escorted access to the weapons vault, full access everywhere else." I told him.
"That works for me. I'll take care of it. Now, you, young lady. What have you had to eat today? Remember, you're eating for two, now." I felt a little . twist in my mind, and he grinned, and said, "I thought not. A cup of tea is not adequate nutrition. I'm sure that Alfred can come up with a proper meal for you." He made shooing motions at me.
"What about you, Mr. Wayne? What has your morning been like?" I glared at him, and reached out with my mind to his, looking about. "Four ounces of orange juice, then sitting on your butt here playing with the Cray. I'll go upstairs and eat if you will. Sheila could probably use some company for lunch."
***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***
Bruce and Alfred ate a 'Ploughman's lunch', while Sheila and I shared a chicken and vegetable casserole. We were finishing the dishes, when a key turned in the lock, and a young woman stomped in. She stopped to look at us, then demanded of Bruce, "Who's the bitch that's been using my name, and what the hell is Catwoman doing here?"
Bruce looked over the financial section of the Times as Alfred tisked, "Miss Brown. Language."
"Sorry, Alfred." She glared at Bruce, and insisted, "You're responsible for this! Who is she, and why is Catwoman here?"
"Both Ms. Hawking and Ms. Kyle are here at my invitation, Stephanie." Bruce said mildly.
Sheila dried her hands, and held out a hand. "Hello. I'm Sheila Hawking, and you are .?"
"Spoiler. The REAL Spoiler!" she spat.
"Miss Brown. Manners." Alfred reminded her.
"Sorry, Alfred." Stephanie said again. She turned to Bruce, and asked, "Why are they here?"
"I have my reasons, Stephanie." Bruce said. "If you have a problem with Ms. Hawking, you should take it downstairs."
Stephanie glared at Bruce, then told Sheila, "Zogger? I'll kick your butt, lady!"
"We'll see, child." Sheila smiled inscrutably.
I moved to the hidden elevator, and asked, "Ladies?"
***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***
We changed while Bruce set up Zogger in dojo mode. I pulled on a purple leotard over white tights, Sheila kept to her customary gray tights, gold shorts and magenta leotard, while Stephanie opted for a cranberry bodysuit and gray shorts.
Sheila left, and I thought about saying something, but decided not to. Stephanie was in no mood to talk.
***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***
The door hissed closed behind the two, and I joined Bruce in the control room. He asked, "Can everyone hear me?" They nodded, and he continued. "The rules are simple. No blows or holds that can kill or cripple. The fight is to first blood or last one standing. Understood?" They nodded again, and I rang a bell.
Sheila stopped in the center of the ring, and gave a traditional bow of respect. Stephanie replied with a spinning back kick which knocked her against the wall. Sheila stood, and said, "If that is how you wish to play it, child." Sheila turned, feinted, and landed a kick in Stephanie's gut.
"You bitch! That hurt!" Stephanie said, as Sheila circled.
"I am right here, child. I am waiting for you to kick my butt."
:: Sheila's playing the inscrutable Oriental. :: I thought to Bruce as I watched the two circle.
:: Messing with her head. :: he replied.
"Damn you, bitch!" Stephanie changed to karate, and managed to land a few blows.
I watched as both fighters stepped back, and took the other's measure after the initial exchanges. Sheila had patience and a bit more experience in the martial arts, but was out of practice. Stephanie, on the other hand, wasn't used to fighting in a dojo, but on the streets. She had speed and reflexes going for her, as well as more developed combat instincts. They circled a few more times, then Stephanie became impatient, and tried a flying side kick, which Sheila slid and twisted away from, landing a nice heel strike to Stephanie's pelvis, forcing her to crash down.
:: Five bucks on Sheila. Stephanie's just mad. She's not taking it seriously. :: I thought.
With a wordless cry of rage, Stephanie twisted up, and took another swing at Sheila.
:: Gambling is illegal in this state, you know. :: I turned and stuck my tongue out at him, and he added, :: That wasn't right of you to use her Spoiler identity without asking her. ::
:: She's the only one who wears a full-face mask. :: I thought. Sheila dodged another attack, got inside Stephanie's defenses, and landed a rapid series of blows. I thought, :: Nice combination, Sheila! ::
:: She's been practicing somewhere. Maybe at work. :: Bruce observed.
:: Undoubtedly a good stress relief from her clients. :: I observed cynically. Stephanie stepped back and shook her head to clear it. I triggered the hatch, and stepped between them. I gripped Stephanie, peeled back her eyelids, and asked her, "How many fingers am I holding up?"
"Um." She shook her head, and tried to focus. "Four?"
"Not quite. Two. If you don't call the fight, I will."
"Um." Stephanie shook her head again, and her knees wobbled. "Okay. 'Uncle'" She gazed at Sheila, who had rushed to support her other side, and asked, "Where'd you learn that?"
"Marine Corps." Sheila replied.
"Cool. Will you show it to me?"
"Sure. Once you're on your feet again."
***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***
"Feel better?" I asked Stephanie.
"Yeah, a bit better, thanks." She sat up from the bed in the medical bay, and looked over at Sheila. "I'm sorry I insulted you."
"You were understandably upset. I will develop my own persona as quickly as possible."
"Thanks. I appreciate it. I've worked hard for Spoiler."
"If you want to be mad at anyone, I'm the one that suggested she use Spoiler." I told Stephanie. I crossed my arms, and said, "What can we learn from this fight?"
"I got pissed, and just started swinging at her. I'm not really used to that kind of fight." Stephanie said.
"I retained my focus, but what do you mean by 'that kind of fight'?" Sheila asked.
"When you're out on the streets, the bad guys are going to try to kill you." I said. "Each of the bat family have a bounty on our heads, dead or alive. How do you think you'd do against Joker, or Ivy?"
"I don't know." Sheila looked at me, and said, "Perhaps I should find out."
***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***
The door closed behind Sheila, and I watched from the control booth. "Ready?" I called. "You'll have everything you need with you."
Sheila took a breath, then nodded, and said, "Let's do it."
I touched the enter key, and the scene morphed into the 23rd Street Metro station. Sheila was wearing a gray skirted business suit, pumps with a medium heel, and carrying a briefcase and a large purse. She stood in line, waiting for the train, when the doors leading up to the street from the platform suddenly rolled down. The security doors at the edge of the platform descended, locking in the morning commuters.
Through a door, the Joker entered, with his usual group of thugs. He announced himself with a burst of automatic fire and his trademark insane laugh. "Good morning, ladies and germs! It's MONDAAAAAY, and I've got a question for you! Why do you hate MONDAYS? It's the start of a whole new week!" He grabbed a young transit worker, and held a pistol with a long barrel to her ear. She closed her eyes and started to whisper a prayer. Joker slowly thumbed the hammer back, and said, "Don't you get it? A HOLE new week!" He squeezed the trigger, and a pointed rod slammed through her head, with a little yellow flag unfurling from the end that said "Bang!" He dropped her corpse, saying "Laugh! That was a great joke! I gotta MILLION OF 'EM!" The crowd screamed, and stampeded for the exits, pushing madly at the heavy steel grilles. I saw Sheila turn, and dash for the ladies' room.
A few minutes later, Batgirl left the ladies' room, making her way toward Joker. She glanced around, and saw a couple of cops working toward Joker. A goon spotted one, and shot him as people dived for the ground again. A citizen grabbed the fallen officer's gun, and returned fire, taking out the goon before being shot himself. Joker ignored the small firefight, concentrating on the twenty or so people he had collected with red hair kneeling before him with their hands on their heads. There was one tall, dark-skinned girl with reddish hair that he singled out, talking to her quietly, even shaking her hand, before motioning toward the doors. She took a step, then stiffened, and collapsed, the Smilex he had injected already making her skin pasty-white, with her hair turning green and her lips impossibly red. She twitched and lay still as Joker laughed.
Batgirl had made it to a large support column, behind which a cop sheltered. She whispered something to the young transit cop, who nodded. The cop aimed at the ceiling over Joker. The falling debris distracted him long enough for Batgirl to throw smoke and gas capsules, which allowed the pinned-down crowd to scramble toward the exits. Joker screamed "BATTY! YOU'RE HERE!". He wrenched a gun from a goon, and started firing blindly, as the hostages screamed and choked on the gas. Batgirl threw more smoke, and then threw a razor 'wing toward Joker's muzzle flashes. Joker yelled, "Ow! That hurt, Batty! Is that any way to treat a friend on his birthday?". He cackled again, then called, "Time to go, boys!" Batgirl tried to follow, but missed Joker, catching a goon from behind, then knocking out a following goon. The smoke started to clear, and Batgirl tried to open the locked door, finally using a explosive pellet on it. She ran down the corridor, only to hear Joker's laugh fade into the distance.
She re-emerged, to find the smoke dissipating. Batgirl made her way back to the ladies' room, and Sheila emerged a few minutes later, as the GCPD finally arrived, and the scene dissolved. Sheila staggered out, and collapsed on a bench. I tossed a towel to her, and said, "Not bad for your first time against the Joker."
Sheila looked up, and was drenched in sweat. She said, "God, that thing is realistic! I could smell the gas and the blood, and the look on their faces ." She shuddered, and said, "I'm glad he's locked up now."
"With Joker, you try to bag him before the body count gets too high. Yours was ." I checked the computer. " . thirty seven. Nice little distraction with the transit cop, but you try not to put others at risk like that."
"Better a cop than a civilian, though." Stephanie pointed out. "My first time, Joker managed to catch and kill me. You did good." Stephanie held out her hand to Sheila.
"Thanks." Sheila tossed the towel around her neck, and asked, "You want to help me with this new costume design?"
Stephanie grinned, and said, "I'd love to!" They headed off toward the costume vault. # 30: Of Enemies and Allies . ***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***---***