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"Good morning!" I said as Sheila entered.
"A good Saturday morning to you, too, Selina," she replied with a grin. "How are you feeling?"
"Pregnancy is officially Not Fun," I declared. I looked at Bruce over my orange juice, and said, "I don't know how some women can do this several times. Bruce, we have an appointment with Dr. Phillips Monday at 8. He wants all three of us there."
"All three of us?" He looked at me over the rim of his coffee cup.
I pointed. "You. Me. Experience here." I patted my tummy. "The nurse passed on the Doctor's message that 'If the father isn't with me', he will be 'Upset With Me.' I don't want our OB 'Upset With Me', so you will therefore be there. I've already called Lucius and explained the situation to him."
"This is what I miss about moving out. The friendly byplay in the mornings … " Sheila mused over her coffee.
"You can come back. Please?" I whined at her.
"Hormones acting up again?" she smirked. "Well … maybe for a while after you whelp that puppy," she said. "I'm only a few minutes away, Selina. Besides, we discussed this. It doesn't look right to have the attorney handling your affairs living with you. It's still somewhat of a gray area, ethically, to buy a house from you."
"Strictly speaking, your mortgage is through Third Gotham Bank, not from me," Bruce put in. "Besides, that was one of my safe houses. With the secret rooms, and links to the systems downstairs, I couldn't sell it to just anyone."
"True, true," Sheila mused. She looked at me over her coffee cup, and asked, "You ready to go? Barbara will be here any time now."
"Go? Go where?" I asked suspiciously.
"Shopping, you twit. Barbara's picking up Stephanie, and we're all going together. You need a few new outfits as you move along, so why don't you go get ready?" She made shooing motions, and added, "She'll be here any time now."
"Joy." I heaved myself up, and glared at her before going upstairs.
"Still hates shopping, doesn't she?" I heard Bruce comment.
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Bruce pulled the Porsche into Dr. Phillip's parking lot at 7:45 Monday morning. I had leaned the passenger seat back to try to get comfortable. Seat belts were not designed with pregnant women, or women in general, in mind I mused. I stopped, and looked at the sign with turf markers. Catwoman and Batgirl's were getting a little faded, although a new one for Lady Justice had been added. I pulled a marker out of my purse, and touched the first two up.
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I waved Bruce to a seat, and told the receptionist, "I'm Selina Kyle, and I have an eight o'clock appointment."
She pulled a file from the stack, and glanced at the sticky note on the front. "Sign in, please. Is Mr. Kyle here?"
I smiled. "Yes, he is." I entered 'Mr. & Mrs. Kyle' and '7:50' on the sign-in sheet. I spied a four month old copy of _Newsweek_ on a table, and handed it to Bruce. "Here you go, Mr. Kyle, sweetie."
"Thank you, Mrs. Kyle," he replied with a smile.
"That's so sweet," a lady next to me commented. "Your first?" She held out her hand, and added, "Amy Carter."
I took her hand, and said, "Selina Kyle, yes, it's my first, and I'm rather nervous about it."
She 'pshaw'd' that comment, and said, "My sixth. Don't worry yourself. Your husband have a good job?"
"Oh, yes. I'm glad I don't have financial worries. I just hope it's healthy."
"Have Dr. P do an amnio test. It will tell you all sorts of things, including if it's a boy or girl," she suggested. "Do you have any preferences?"
"That it's healthy, and has all the right number of parts. Beyond that … " I shrugged.
She looked at Bruce, reading an article about the 'latest' Mid-East problems. She cocked her head, and said, "He looks familiar. Where have I seen him before?"
"We both work for WayneCorp, so you may have seen him on TV once or twice," I said.
"That's probably it." She looked at me, and said, "Now, then. Any questions that you'd rather not ask the doctor? After all, he's a wonderful doctor and all, but he's still a man, and he's never done this."
"Well … I've heard delivery is painful. Any suggestions on getting through it?"
She snorted. "Well, you know your period cramps? It's worse than that. You'll be using language that your mother would be shocked to hear coming from you." She patted my hand, and said, "Drugs are your friend."
"Joy." I looked up as the nurse called, "Kyle?" Both Bruce and I got up.
"Mr. Kyle, if you'll have a seat, the doctor will call you when he's finished examining your wife." Bruce nodded, and walked back to his seat, picking up a copy of _Home and Garden_.
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"Mr. Kyle, so good to meet you. Thank you, Amy." Dr. Phillips told the nurse as she escorted Bruce into his office. As Bruce took a seat next to me, Dr. Phillips resumed his chair, then switched on a small device. A low hum filled the air, and Bruce looked at him.
"Scrambler device. Defeats bugs that any of my patients OR visitors might have planted in here. Now then, Selina, have you been following the diet and exercise plan I gave you?"
I nodded, and he asked, "When you first came to see me a few months ago, you had mentioned that you had an … accident at your night job. I presume this is the other … participant?"
I patted Bruce's knee. "Yes, he is."
Bruce sighed, and pulled a device out of his pocket, switching it on. He put it on the desk, and said, "Jamming device, and also creates an EM field that makes all kinds of recording devices inoperative." He motioned to Dr. Phillips' desktop Macintosh, and added, "It won't harm your computer, so you might as well just turn it off."
"Interesting …" Dr. Phillips eyed it, then said, "We might as well speak plainly, then." He looked at me, then said, "Regarding your nighttime activities as Catwoman, or Batgirl, I'd like to know if you'd like to abort this fetus? If so, let me know before you use a more high-tech version of the coat hanger. You know, there is a REASON pregnant women don't go on roller coasters, and a jump line from thirty floors up has a similar reason!
Bruce opened his mouth, and Dr. Phillips turned to him. "As for you, Mr. 'World's Greatest Detective', get a god-damned CLUE! This would be a lot easier on my nerves if YOU were in her body instead of HIM. After all, a real woman would know better! With all your money, can't you buy her a CAR instead of a motorcycle?"
I glared at Dr. Phillips. "Now wait a minute … "
"No, you wait a minute, missy. Does the phrase 'armchair detective' mean anything to you?" He snorted, then added, "This also means that you stay out of chemistry labs, nuclear reactors, and whatever the HELL else you have in that fancy cave you hang around in! If you want to abort this fetus, let me know now, and you'll find my rates reasonably extortionate." He gave us both a long glare, then added, "The longer I have to deal with metas, the more attractive retirement in Florida sounds."
"I never thought about the chem lab or the reactor." I looked at Bruce, who returned my look.
"You actually have one?" Dr. Phillips asked curiously.
"Twenty megawatt fusion," I replied distractedly.
"I don't want to take chances," Bruce said.
I glanced at him, and then said, "Doctor, are you available tonight after you close?"
"I think so." He flipped open his day planner, and said, "Nothing I can't get out of."
"Good. One of us will pick you up at …"
"Last appointment at seven … eight thirty would be good. I expect dinner."
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I was wearing workout clothes, and talking to Lady Justice when the Car pulled to a stop. The passenger door opened as it rotated on the turntable. I walked over, and said, "Hello, Doctor." I took the pizza box he handed me. With a roar, Lady Justice left on her motorcycle.
"That was …"
"Lady Justice, and no, I won't tell you who she is. It's dangerous enough that you know who we are," I told him.
"So this is the famous Batcave." He looked around. With the screech of tires, the Car left.
"No, this is the motor pool. Dressing rooms through there, weapon vaults through there." I started to walk, carrying the pizza box.
He frowned. "What's in the weapon vaults?"
I turned, and glared at him. "Kryptonite, among other things. Since you've grounded me, I presume you'd like a tour?"
"You're the one that grounded yourself, missy." He smiled, though, and said, "If it wouldn't be too much trouble."
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"… This is the trophy room. The robot T-Rex is from … " I turned about, and said, "Hello, Kal. Finished your workout?"
"Hello, Selina. Thanks for letting me stop by." He gazed at me for a second, and then held out his hand to Dr. Phillips. "Kal-El, but my friends call me …"
" … Kal," I interrupted. "Dr. Phillips, my obstetrician, this is Kal-El of Krypton, also known as … "
"Superman." He looked over Kal, and then shook himself, and shook the proffered hand. "Sorry."
Kal chuckled, and said, "Believe me, I'm used to it. It's nice to be able to escape for a bit, and just be a regular guy, you know." He indicated me, and said, "Is there anything wrong? The fetus looked healthy to me."
"That's why I'm here." Dr. Phillips lifted his scanning equipment, and added, "I'm concerned about possible environmental problems, given her lifestyle. How often do you scan her?"
"Not as often as I'd like. This is only the second time I've been here since she became, well …"
"Pregnant?" I interrupted. "I'm here, guys. You can talk TO me, you know."
"Sorry, Selina," Kal said. He glanced at Dr. Phillips, and added, "Let me have your card, please. If there's anything you see that I can help with, please let me know."
"Certainly, but how …"
With a blur, Kal had left and returned with a pen. He glanced at Dr. Phillips card, then wrote something on the back. "An email address I keep an eye on. I've dealt with my Gotham friends here for years, and I know how stubborn they can be."
I said, "Stubborn? Listen, farm boy, I'll … "
Kal silenced me with his hand. "Now, Selina, be good. Otherwise I'll let my wife interview you." I glared at him, then nodded.
"You must have an interesting wife. Does she know, err, about this?" Dr. Phillips asked.
"About who I am? Of course. I can't hide anything from her." I snorted, and Kal continued. "She knows Selina's moved in with Bruce, but not who they are. I think." I snorted again. Kal finally took the hint, and made his goodbyes.
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After he finished his sweeps, Dr. Phillips asked, "That was interesting. Does the JLA know about your little problem?"
"Which one, the pregnancy or the mind-switch?" I snapped.
"Either one."
"Oracle and the Manhunter know about both of them. The rest of them, as far as I know, don't. Catwoman isn't someone they'd normally know. Since I'm not a member, but Batman is, I have to let him handle it. Even if they did know me, they wouldn't invite me to their monthly poker games." I stopped walking, and motioning to his equipment, asked, "Got enough information? I do normally monitor the environment here, you know. Besides, I have a meeting tonight."
He nodded, and I continued, "If you don't mind waiting, I need to change. Should I drop you back at your office?"
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## Chapter 32: Of Cave and Kal
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