Chapter 8: Kiss me, under the bearded barley . . . or just kiss my feet, jerk.

Yo, people, I do not own these characters. So there! blah! Thanks Water Goddess for reviews. Ya keep me going along with Rose and ZEIG!! I spelled it right!

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I stood in the castle, in a room of great grandeur. Jeeze, if ever there was a honey moon suite to be had . . . this was it. Where was Zeek when I wanted to be romantic. Scratch that, I was still hurt by what he had said. I folded my arms as I stared at the bed. Albert had allowed us rest from our journey, that is, after he had had his way with us. Basically the evening went like this:

I told King Albert what had happened. Zeek glared at me while still checking out my butt. Oh yeah, I knew it. Raymond explained that the orcs were simply dead corpses brought back to life to serve as disposable warriors. He was forced to create plans for them, or else they'd cut off his hands. ((quite personally, I couldn't live without my hands. I need them to type and draw. I'd die with the severing of my hands!)) He rambled on about something, but I was still too PO'd about Zeek. That's when I was shown here.

I glared at the bed. I decided to leave this castle and head for a drink at the local bar. Yeah! I wasn't in the U. S. A. anymore! I could drink if I wanted too! I smiled and walked easily out of the room, and then snuck the rest of the way out. I smiled as I reached the door. Ah! At last! Freedom. I ran down the pathway and into Bales. I was quickly surrounded by buildings with warmly lit windows. I walked easily until I came to the tavern and strolled right in. I ordered the bottle of spirits. I sighed and took a deep swig. BAD CHOICE!! The stuff was so damn strong, I made a terrible face and nearly spit it out. The bartender laughed and patted my shoulder.

"Just tell me when you get all fuzzy. That's when you start to get drunk." he told me. Hell. . . .

"It's quite fine, Victor, I'll take care of this little lady for you," said a silky voice behind me.

I turned to see Aron. He put his hands around my waist because I had almost fell off of the stool. He smiled, charmingly enough, but only sat down beside me. He received a glass from the bartender and I poured him some.

"What would drive a bright, young, and Beautiful young woman, such as yourself to drink?" Aron asked.

"Zeek. I oughta kill that jerk!" I yelled, jumping up in power, and then drinking some more. Whoo . . . my head spun for a moment.

"Why? What happened to you two? Even at the cave, you seemed pretty pissed." Aron said, rubbing my shoulders, trying to make me sit ad calm down.

"I don't know. One minute he says he loves me and then the next he says I'm the root of all evil." I said. Aron was giving me a strange look.

"Gee, that's how women usually act." he said.

"Humph."

"No offense. But I think you should put that bottle down and show him that you can be a total babe, ya know?" he said. I shot him a wary look.

"I want to get drunk."

"So do I. I also want a nice lady to sleep with, but since you saved my life, I'm not going to do anything like that to you. But, you need to let me have that bottle and go straight back to that castle. Then you're gonna get dressed in a nice little outfit and go into Zeek's room. Wake him up if you have to, but make sure to get the worries out of your mind and make him apologize. After that, sort of be seductive and when he bites the bait, leave."

"Leave?"

"Yeah."

"Why? What if I want to shag him?"

"Eh, You have to torture the man and MAKE him feel like dirt. And what's worst than being dirt is being horny dirt. Got it?" Aron asked, with a sly smile. I slowly smiled.

"Ah. . . . I like you Aron. You know both men and women's hearts!" I said. He smiled and patted my back.

"There ya go!" he said. "Do you have any money to pay for this bottle?"

My heart sank for a moment.

"No."

"Don't worry then." he said. Aron walked away to a near by table to a couple of girls. He sweet talked them and kissed each of their cheeks. He also pick pocketed them. He came back and paid for the bottle. I thanked him as he helped me to the castle gates.

I went up to my room and rummaged around in the large closet. I found a sexy dress with low cut. It also had a slit up the side. This room must have been used for the ladies of the court. They wouldn't miss this dress, would they? I slipped it on and laced up the back really tight. I looked at myself in the mirror. I noticed my B-cup was also getting bigger. That was weird. But I could live perfectly fine with that!

I walked up to Zeek's room and noticed that the door was open. He he he he . . . I'd make the bastard wish he'd been nice to me. But to tell the truth, I just wanted him to love me. I shook my head and walked in. I heard mumbling in his large closet as well. I snuck, barefooted as I was, to the door. I heard his voice and that of another. A woman. I peeked in. She was prettier than I. Her hair was blond and she had blue eyes. She was older, just by a year or two, than me, and, I noticed, larger breasts. She wore a deep blue gown and had her hand placed on Zeek's arm.

"So, you're going to go wherever my father tells you?" she asked. Albert's daughter. That was her. Ella. The princess. Master of the bow. Okay. I could deal with this.

"Yeah. You couldn't come. It'd be too dangerous." he said. Oh so he cared about her safety more than mine? He never objected to my being on this perilous journey.

"You and your father will be arriving some day after you finish, right? I tire of waiting, darling." said Ella. I clenched my jaw. What did she mean by Zeek and Dart returning? What did she wait from?

"We will, Ella. I promise." Zeek said. He started to hit some boards on the floor.

"Sweet Heart, the scroll is on the left side of the left corner." Ella said. "Now tell me how our Honeymoon will be." Ella said. My eyes dropped for a moment to blink the stinging tears away.

"Splendid, I'm sure. You're father said this scroll would let us in?"

"Yes. He did. Now tell me that you love me."

"Ella . . ."

"Say it."

"I love you."

I pushed away from the door and ran out. Zeek looked out to see the bottom of the black dress I wore. He raced out and Ella followed.

"Rose . . . " Zeek whispered. I stopped to look at him and then to Ella, who stuck her nose up and sneered.

"That's my dress." she said, laughing. How could the daughter of Albert be so mean?

I flipped the princess and Zeek off, both of them looking at me like I was crazy. They didn't know what it meant. I went back to my room and sat on the bed. I had locked the door as I sniffled a little bit.

"So smooth, Rose. Everytone on Earth would commend you for flipping them off and saying 'Screw you'." I whispered. The only problem was, I was on Endiness. No one on my side was laughing and congratulating me. In fact no one knew what screw you or the bird meant. I laughed at myself. And cried. How could I ask for more? I was already here. How could I ask for Zeek to love me? What kind of stupid Bombo was I?

And why was I pitying myself? I should be telling that jerk to kiss my ass, not me. Because I was pathetic.