Shared Destiny

Author: Norwalker

Part 11 of ?

Summary: Faith asks, in Enemies, " Everybody asks why can't you be more like Buffy. But does anyone ask why Buffy can't be more like me?" So, what if , after season 3, Buffy became more like Faith?

Rating/ Category: Rated R Romance/Angst

Spoilers: Possible season 3 and after spoilers.

Time Line: Departs after season 3

Disclaimer: Joss Whedon , Mutant Enemy and Fox own them.

Warnings: Dark fiction. Character Death happens, please be aware of this. Strong language, sexual situations between members of the same sex. Violence. Possible racial/ethnic slurs that the author in no way supports or shares.

Willow is trapped.

Trapped in a little box inside her own brain. The demon,… or god … that took over her body has imprisoned her in a tiny little box in her own brain. He can't kill her… not yet. But he can torture her, and he relishes torturing her. She can see and hear what he's doing, but she can't do anything else… most to the time. There have been a few times, when he's distracted, or unconscious, that she's been able to 'break out' for a short period of time. But it's very draining.

He's shut her off now. It's her punishment for that last little defiance she pulled. He nearly killed her, but stopped at the last second. She finally realized that he can't kill her… not until he's gained full possession. Somehow, she's got to figure a way to use that, stop him. Or weaken him enough so Buffy or Faith or someone can stop him. He's gotta be stopped.

Willow curses herself for being a fool. ' This is my fault, all my fault' she scolds herself ' I thought I was so good, so strong in magic. I was reckless, careless and drew attention to myself. This… thing… picked me because I was so easy to take over. Because I played with magicks I shouldn't have played with. Damn me. It knew once it got past my resistance, it could play on my weaknesses, my stupid vanity. It used me! And… poor Tara… she paid for my sins. He made me watch while he abused her. What he did to her… I saw the look in her eyes… of betrayal, of hurt, of sheer terror. Oh goddess, what have I done? He made me listen to her whimpers and her screams. He lied to Buffy, and then tried to seduce her, while he laughed at me… watching me squirm. Goddess, damn me to hell for being so weak. Why didn't I kill myself? While I still had some control? I'm weak, I'm a coward. I was afraid to die. I listened to him, let him corrupt me. I hate him, I hate him… and I hate myself worse.'

' He thinks he's just learned my secrets, but he's given away his own secrets… his weaknesses. But what good is that if I can't tell anyone? Every time I try to break out, he slaps me back down. I gotta find a way… somehow… I gotta tell what I know. He can be defeated. I have to help… I've got to. How… how am I going to do it? Think, Willow, think!' Willow probes around, finds that Set is sleeping. If she tries to take possession of her body, he'll wake up… but… maybe she can link minds…if she can link with Tara, maybe she can pass along what she knows… it's going to be hard. Set moved out on Tara, he went into hiding, until his power is complete. Willow senses his fear, and it makes her feel… stronger. Quietly, she begins to concentrate…she brings the image of Tara very clear in her consciousness. She has to be sure it reaches her. She senses she's not going to get another chance. Slowly, painfully she reaches out with her mind.

Tara is restless. She's never comfortable in a new place.

She moved in with Buffy and Faith when that… thing… that has Willow moved out. She went to their room one day, and Willow was gone… having taken nothing but some clothes. But Willow… no, Set… that's NOT Willow! … had left a message for her. It destroyed the room, tearing up everything it left behind. On the walls it wrote " I will kill you for betraying me! You'll die a slow, painful death". Tara's heart nearly stopped when she saw that. She's trying so hard to be brave, to come to terms with what's happened to Willow. She put up with the abuse, and the taunts, hoping to learn more about it, to help defeat it. When she saw that note from Willow… the real Willow … in her purse, she nearly cried. Thinking of her poor baby so lost and confused and alone hurt her badly. Thinking of that monster using Willow to abuse her, touched an anger she didn't know she had. She wanted nothing more than to kill that thing. Watch it suffer, like it made her suffer!

She gets up, and looks out the window. She can sense something. Something at the back of her mind is trying to get her attention. But she can't quite get to it. Too many thoughts are blocking the way. She finally gets a candle. She decides to meditate, to free her mind. Maybe then she can figure it out .

Tara turns off the lights in the room, leaving just a night light to see by. She sits in the middle of the room, and placing the candle before her, lights it. She concentrates on the flame, slowing her breathing. She begins to clear her mind, letting go of the thoughts plaguing her, concentrating only on the candle, and the flame. One by one, the thoughts drop by the wayside, until her mind is a blank canvas, ready to be used. Slowly, an image forms in her mind. At first, it's hazy…more an idea than a solid image. It seems to be surrounded in darkness. She concentrates on the darkness, and a light seems to start to penetrate the darkness. A form appears, distant… but getting closer. She finds herself walking towards the form. It's familiar, so familiar…

Willow!!!

She walks and sits by Willow. Willow turns to her, and her face is sad. But she smiles at seeing Tara.

" Tara!" Willow says, her gladness tempered by guilt and remorse." Tara!"

"Willow… oh… baby, I've missed you so much!" Tara cries, reaching out to her. Willow pulls her close, and for a few moments they just hold each other.

" Tara, honey, I'm so sorry. I've screwed up so badly" Willow says, releasing her." This is my fault!"

"Willow, hush!" Tara replies, " that's ridiculous!"

"No," Willow says, remorsefully," you were right. I … rushed too quickly into the power. I didn't learn to control it. I fooled myself into believing I was different, special. I'm not. I made myself a target. Set told me. He was attracted to the dark power I was using. Oh, goddess, Tara, I screwed up bad."

"Shhh, Willow" Tara tries to calm her, " That's not true. He's lying. You told Buffy he's the king of liars. He's lying to you!"

"I wish I could believe that, Tara" Willow says, ruefully, " But I know it's not true. I can sense he's not lying. I let my vanity, my pride rule me. I was an easy target. But I don't care about that. He hurt you… oh, goddess, the things he did to you… baby, I'm so sorry. I couldn't stop him. I tried, but I couldn't stop him. Please, please baby, forgive me" . Willow turns away, ashamed to look at Tara.

Tara reaches out, taking Willow's face in her hands. " Willow, I know that wasn't you. You'd never do those things to me. He's evil, Willow. He likes to hurt. Buffy told me what he tried to do with her. He's evil, and he's going to pay for it, I promise!". Tara's tone is firm and resolved. " We'll get him out of you, somehow. I'm researching separation spells and exorcisms… something to drive him out."

Willow nods quietly. She hasn't the heart to tell Tara it's probably too late. Set has to pay, even if she, Willow, has to pay the price, too. She changes the subject quickly, not wanting to dwell on it.

" Tara, listen." Willow says, " I don't have much time. He might wake up, and I'll have to go. So, please, listen carefully. It's important".

Willow talks to Tara, telling her what she's learned about Set and his weaknesses. She's about finished when her expression changes to one of panic

" He's waking up. I've got to go! Please, it's important, Tara, remember the order. It's critical to defeating him" Willow starts to fade. She reaches out to Tara, her last words to her are " I … love …. You…." and then, the darkness returns.

Tara's eyes open, a look of resolve shining in them. She gets up, taking the candle with her, and goes to her nightstand. She takes a pen and pad, and writes down what Willow told her, being very careful to remember the sequence the steps must be done to be successful. Looking over her notes, she nods her approval.

They're going to defeat this monster, and save Willow. She just knows it. Putting the pad away, she slips into bed, her mind more at peace than it's been in weeks.

She leans over, and blows out the candle.

" I don't get it" Buffy says, looking puzzled, " You spoke to Willow? How?"

The group was gathered at the Magic Box. Buffy had called a meeting after Tara had told her about talking with Willow the night before. They sat around the table, trying to make sense of what Tara was telling them.

"Are you saying that Willow was in the house last night?" Faith asked, " Isn't that kinda dangerous, considering? And, why didn't we hear her?"

"No… Willow… Set… wasn't in the house" Tara says, " I linked minds with Willow… the real Willow. Or, she linked with me."

"Tara, please don't take this the wrong way, but how do you know it wasn't a trick?" Giles asks, doubtful." After all, Set might have done this to confuse us, or throw us off the track".

" I just know, Giles" Tara says quietly, but resolutely." I know Willow. That was Willow, not Set!".

Buffy and Faith both look at Tara, and see the look in her eyes. They nod, and Faith says, " We believe you, Tara. So, what did Willow say?".

"Set may be immortal… but he's not invulnerable. He can be stopped." Tara said, " His strength is in darkness. Light weakens him. Intense light can make him confused, disoriented. Willow told me there are three steps to taking him out, but we need some special things."

" The sword of Horus, and the Eye of Isis?" Angel asks

"Yes. How did you know?" Tara asks, bewildered

"Strangely enough, Spike" Buffy says, a little acerbically. " Seems he heard some talk around the underground about it".

" I'm still trying to get my head around Spike helping us" Faith says, " He's not exactly a boy scout, ya know?"

Buffy shrugs "Not a clue. Don't care. We can use all the help we can get. And, if he turns out to be less than straight with us, I still have a stake with his name on it".

" Willow said there was a particular order things had to be done" Tara picks up where she left off, " First of all, the intense light. That'll weaken and confuse him. Then, someone has to use the Eye of Isis on him. Evidently, it takes away his powers, particularly any protections he has. Finally, he has to be killed with the sword of Horus… it will dissipate his spirit, destroying him. One final thing. A spell has to be cast, sealing him IN this dimension. The way he avoided destruction before was slipping into a hell dimension. If he can't escape, he'll be trapped here, and his …essence will be dispersed."

"I'm going out on a limb here and thinking you're working on a spell for that?" Buffy says to Tara.

Tara nods. " And for a way to separate him from Willow's body" Tara says.

There is a small hush at the table. Tara, sensing their doubt, continues, " I can do this. I know I can. I have to!" She says, " I… I know I'm not a s-s-strong a witch as Willow…." She trails off, looking down.

" You're a fine witch" Faith says, covering Tara's hand with hers, " If anyone can do it, I'm sure you can" She smiles at the shy Wiccan.

There are " Right, that's right" all around the table.

"There's still the matter of the other items" Buffy says, changing the subject, " I've got Spike working on the sword of Horus, and the Eye of Isis… we may need some money there, Giles. You know Spike" Buffy says, " Actually better than I. Does it give anyone else the wiggins that he's working on our side?"

Angel makes a face " I don't trust him."

Yes, well, right now, we have no choice… unless somebody else has a those things lying around?" She looks around at the group... no one makes eye contact. "Right. Didn't think so". She continues, " But there still the matter of the lights. I thinking flashlights are going to cut it".

"Well, actually, I … uh, I think I can get that covered" A figure emerges from the bookshelves. He walks to the table, studiously avoiding looking at Buffy.

" Xander" Buffy says, her voice filled with more than a little disgust. She gets up, and walks away from the table…in the opposite direction from Xander Harris.

" Look, Buffy" Xander says, moving towards her, " We gotta talk…"

"No, actually, Xander, we don't" Buffy says, " We had that discussion already, remember?" She says, her eyebrow arched. She moves to the table, addressing the group, as if he's not there. " What's he doing here, anyway? Not sure I want to be part of a group he's part of" She says, moving towards the front of the store. Xander makes as if to follow her, but Faith puts up her hand. She rises, and goes to Buffy.

"B, stop being a child" Faith says to Buffy, her tone firm. " There isn't time for it".

"A child?" Buffy says, amazed, " Did you forget, Faith? It wasn't me that walked away from him. It wasn't ME that snubbed him. Even though he knew the charges against me were bogus, he still backed Anya when she treated me like dog crap!".

" So, you're gonna punish him for Anya being a moron?" Faith says, " that really fair, B?"

" Fair?" Buffy says, her voice low and hard, " Was it fair they treated me like some kinda leper? Don't think so."

" He made a stupid mistake. We're talking Xander here… not exactly the poster boy for intelligence, right?" Faith says.

" I so don't hear an apology" Buffy says. " Seems he was big on getting down on me when I blew it. Wasn't big on forgiveness, as I remember. So, why should I be different?"

"Well for one thing, you're Buffy, and he's Xander." Faith says, stating the obvious." You're big on forgiveness, as I recall".

"It really hurt, Faith. I needed my friends. He didn't even try to reach out!" Buffy says, knowing she's losing this one.

"So, you're just going to do the same damned thing?" Faith asks, pointedly, " besides, B., Red's his friend, too. For longer she's been yours. Is it right to keep him from helping?"

Buffy gives Faith a look, and makes a face. " I really hate it when you're right!" Buffy says, pouting. " Fine. Let him help. Just keep him outta my way, is all. And if he gets killed, I'm so not saving him!".

Faith almost cracks up at the ridiculousness of that last line, but somehow she keeps a straight face. She leads the less than happy blonde slayer back to the group.

" … well, then it's settled" Giles is saying to Xander. " You're sure you can borrow your friends equipment?"

" And my friend, since there is more than one rig, and it'll need a couple of us to bring it all in." Xander says.

"So, Xan-man, fill us in, then" Faith says.

" I've got a friend in the film industry" Xander says.

" I'll bet" Buffy says, almost under her breath, " Probably porn movies".

"Buffy, please!" Giles says, impatiently. " This is important".

Buffy makes a face, and turns away. Pouting, naturally.

"Anyway" Xander continues, overlooking Buffy's interruption, " He owes me a couple of favors. He has a lighting set up, for location shoots. They are totally powerful banks of lights that run off diesel generators. I think that may do the trick" .

" Sounds good, Xan-man" Faith smiles, " Thanks".

Buffy, thinking she's unobserved, mocks Faith. " Sounds good, Xan-man" She mouths, sarcastically. She looks up, and everyone is staring at her. She blushes and looks down. Busted!

" Hey," Xander says, to the group, " don't be hard on her. I kinda got that coming" He turns to Buffy, " Look, Buff… I know I really screwed up. We screwed up, me and Anya. But me mostly , cuz you're my friend… or were." He hesitates, hoping she'll see he's genuinely sorry. " I… I should've stuck by you, no matter what. I didn't, and I really regret it. I know that's not enough, it doesn't make it better, or right. But, I really want to help Willow. I want to be part of the team, like old times. Please, Buffy?" Xander asks, contritely.

Buffy doesn't say anything. She gets up, and walks to Xander. Xander, a little afraid, backs off…but she catches him, giving him a hug. She lays her head on his chest, and says" Thanks, Xan… that's what I wanted to hear." She smiles up at him. Xander, pleased and a little embarrassed at the same time, awkwardly hugs her back. She looks up at him, a serious expression on her face, " But you know, if you EVER do something like that again, I'm telling Willow who put the frog in her locker…" Buffy teases him.

" Buffster! You wouldn't !" Xander says, pretending shock.

" Oh, wouldn't I?" Buffy says, challenging him.

"Uhhh… ok", Xander says, suitably chastened.

They break the hug, and the group is smiling. Even Faith, the eternal cynic, has a small grin on her face.

" Hey… HEY! The show's over. Don't you guys got stuff to do? Like, save the world, maybe?" Buffy asks. She makes her way back to the table. At that moment, Spike bursts into the shop, as if the hounds of hell are on his tail. He's carrying a something loosely bundled in a old sheet. He approaches the table, quickly changing his stride to a swagger.

" Well, well, seems I'm in time for the meeting of the Slayers and their attack kittens" He ridicules the group. He drops the bundle on the table. " I've managed to lay ahold of those little baubles you wanted, pet" Spike says, addressing Buffy.

" Really? Looks like you brought along your dirty laundry, Spike" Buffy says, mocking him.

Spike opens the bundle, and pulls out the items within. One is a beautifully forged sword, the blade appearing a golden color, the handle an interweave of ebony and ivory. Craved into the blade are Egyptian hieroglyphs, and a large sun flanked by three stars. The amulet, black bordered with a white center, contains what looks like the representation of an eye, made out of lapis lazuli and emeralds and other precious stones. The border has small hieroglyphs in gold.

" So, slayer, if you'll be handing over the cash, I'll be on my way" Spike says, looking nervously towards the door.

" Ummm… do you see a sign that says " Stupid" pasted to my forehead, Spike?" Buffy says, " No money til we are sure these are the real thing!"

" Bloody hell, Slayer, we had a deal! I bring you the goods, you give me money. Simple" Spike says, upset, and getting more nervous by the second.

" And as I remember, I told you to be sure they're real. So, you won't mind if Giles verifies it, now will you?" Buffy says, her tone hardening.

Spike makes an angry, frustrated noise, but knows he can't win against these odds. So he begins to pace. Giles, taking his cue, goes to the loft library to get some books to authenticate the sword and amulet. Faith watches Spike, her slayer sense buzzing overtime. Something is just so wrong her. She gets up, and without warning, pushes him up against the closest wall.

" HEY! What in bleeding hell are you doing, slayer?" Spike says, acting indignant.

" What's the deal, Spike? You're acting as nervous as a cat in a kennel full of pit bulls. What's going on?" Faith growls, not at all amused.

" Nothing is going on!" Spike spits back, " I just want to get paid for my efforts, is all!".

" You heard B. You'll be paid, once we know these things are real!" Faith gives him a sidelong glance." These are the real deal, aren't they Spike?" She says, her tone getting low and dangerous.

"Well, of course they're real! I'm not a bloody liar, you know!" Spike says, again acting indignant.

"No, you're just a thief!" A voice comes from the front of the shop. Everybody turns towards the voice, and sees what is probably the biggest demon they've every seen. He must stand over 8 feet tall, his head inches below the ceiling. He… it? … doesn't look very pleased.

"Spike, what the hell is going on?" Buffy says, getting up and approaching Spike. " Make it good and quick, or I'm ramming home this stake!" Buffy pulls out her favorite stake, pointing it directly into Spike's chest.

" Well, ummm… slayer, those items you wanted? Not exactly for sale, so I had to … appropriate them by different means" Spike mutters.

" You stole them" Buffy says, her tone truly disgusted. " So, tell me, Bleach boy. Why shouldn't I just hand you over to tall, dark and ugly over there?" She nods towards the demon.

" Little human" The demon says, " Do you really think you could keep him from me? I came for my things, and for the vampire. Out of my way, or I'll rip you to shreds!"

" I don't think so, Kareem Abdul Jabberwocky. I'd be more than happy to watch you tear Spike limb from limb, but I need the sword and amulet!" Buffy says. She drops into her fighting stance.

The demon looks at her, and laughs. " Puhlease, midget. This is most amusing, but I just want my things!" The demon doesn't take her seriously. He moves towards her, ready to brush her out of the way.

What he didn't realize is that Buffy wasn't exactly alone in this. Faith is up, and on him before he can blink. She's jumped on his back, and has pulled out a knife, stabbing him around the face and neck The demon, no longer amused, roars out, and makes to grab Faith. At that moment, Buffy does a flying kick into what passes as his solar plexus. He's flying backwards, into the shelves… of course, destroying everything on the shelves. Giles looks a little pained, realizing that in one blow he's lost a few thousand dollars in merchandise.

The demon recovers quickly, standing up and shrugging Faith off. She rolls, and lands on her feet. Buffy is charging the enraged demon, doing a head over heels kick, hitting him square…in the stomach. He bends over, and Faith, behind him, sends him flying into another shelf with a kick to his rear end. Roaring in anger, the demon turns, delivering a hard blow to Faith, who goes flying into a wall…and slides down, stunned. He turns on the other slayer, but in the meantime, Buffy has taken the sword of Horus, and is brandishing it. The demon, knowing its power…stops.

" Give it up, little human" He sneers, but it's all bravado. He's more than scared, " You can't win this".

" Oh, really?" Buffy says. Not waiting, she presses forward with the sword. The demon backs away, but is against a wall. Buffy isn't about to let this go, and with one stroke, plunges the sword in the demon. The demon screams, and all of a sudden, the blade glows. The demon is surrounded by a white hot flame, and almost instantly turns to ash. Buffy looks at the sword, impressed. Then, remembering Faith, she runs over to where she's lying. For a second, she's panicks, because Faith isn't moving. She feels for a pulse, and is relieved that it's strong. Faith opens her eyes, and sees the worried face of Buffy leaning over her. She notes the sword in Buffy's hands.

" How come it always turns out, you get to use the cool toys, and I get knocked against the wall?" Faith complains, shaking her head. "Damn, that hurts!" She starts to get up, but her knees are still wobbly. Buffy, concerned, drops the sword, lifts her and carries her to the table( mmmm… if it weren't for the bruises, I could so get used to this, Faith thinks to herself). Buffy gently puts her in a chair. She fusses around her, trying to make her comfortable.

" Are you ok, baby?" Buffy asks.

"Yeah, I'm good. 5 by 5, B, " Faith says. Ok, enough babying… well… in public, anyway, she thinks.

Buffy smiles, and goes back and picks up the sword. She lifts it over her head, smiling.

" This is one wicked cool sword, Giles" Buffy says, grinning from ear to ear, " I think we can call it the real deal".

" Well, I told you that, didn't I?" Spike says, sullenly.

" Yes, you did, Spike" Angel chimes in, " You being the model of honesty and trust."

" Listen, gel-boy, I don't need you to vouch me" Spike sneers at him, " After all, I delivered on my side of the bargain"

"What's that supposed to mean, Bleach boy?" Angel growls at him.

" It means, prince of poufs, I still seem to be a bit shy on the cash promised" Spike returns the salvo.

" Well, Spike," Giles says acerbically, " Since it was you're fault that the rather large demon wrecked my shop, I think you better be looking elsewhere for remuneration".

"That's not bloody fair!" Spike protests. Before he can say more, Giles is in his face, gripping him by the neck.

" Listen here, you burke" Giles says, his temper rising, " I don't like you anyway, I have no compunctions about beating you to a pulp. So, don't push it!". He releases Spike, letting him drop to the floor.

" Giles!" Buffy says, her tone harsh, " Give him the money."

" But, Buffy… " Giles says, looking around the shop, " He …" But she cuts him off.

:" Give it to him, Giles. He earned it" Buffy says, her face not brooking argument.

Giles closes his eyes in anger, but walks around the counter, and pulls out a box. He takes out a stack of bills, returning the box to its place. He walks over to Spike, and flings the money at him. Spike shoots him a look, but collects up the scattered bills.

"Thank you, slayer" Spike says, counting his money.

" It's all there, now get out , Spike" Giles says, his voice low, but dangerous, " before I kick you out".

" If you don't mind, I'll just count it , first!" Spike says, a little snotty in his tone.

"Get out, Spike" Buffy says, standing up. " You got your money, now go!"

"But…." Spike sputters.

" Get out!" Buffy says, moving towards him. Spike moves, making towards the door. He turns back.

" See if I do anything for you in the future!" Spike says, angry.

" Stay out of our way, Spike. That's all you need to do!" Buffy says. Spike, glowering, turns and leaves.

" Why did you have me pay him, Buffy?" Giles says, upset. " He ruined my shop!"
" First rule of war, Giles. Don't make any enemies you don't need, especially those that have access to your back." Buffy says, quietly." He might be pissed at me for being harsh, but he doesn't feel cheated. I really DON'T need to be worrying about Spike with all the rest going on!".

Giles sighs, shaking his head. He understands the logic, but still is not pleased. He returns to the table and sits.

" Don't sweat it, Giles" Buffy says, " I'll figure a way to pay you back".

" Don't be silly, Buffy" Giles says quietly.

"I'm not being silly, Giles. I know you have a lot invested in this store. I'll make good on the damage" Buffy says, closing the subject. "Lets move on. I think we can all agree the sword is genuine?" Everybody nods, " Ok, then. Giles, I need you to be sure about the Eye of Isis. It's critical all the pieces are what they're supposed to be. Once we're sure, we're going on the offensive. Don't know about you, but I'm tired of waiting around for apocalypses to happen. I say, we take it to Set! Is everyone agreed?" Buffy looks around at the group.

One by one , everyone nods. They have to agree that the sooner this is over, the better. Before Set has a chance to grow stronger.

" Tara? How're you coming with those spells? Any luck with the separation spells?" Buffy asks, gently.

" I t-think I've found something th-that'll work" Tara says," I just need to practice them a little".

" Ok, do it now" Buffy says, " Giles will give you anything you need" Buffy looks to Giles, who nods.

" Is everyone clear on their responsibilities then?" Buffy asks, looking around the group. Everyone nods…except Faith. Buffy looks at her questioningly.

" I'm still not exactly sure what you want me to do, B" Faith states.

" Ummm… you're with me, Faith. We're going up against a God. I think it'll take more than one of us to distract him til everything's in place" Buffy says, quietly.

"And after?" Faith asks, "What do I do?"

Buffy's eyes glance over at Tara. " We can discuss this later, Faith", Buffy says

" Ok, B" Faith says, getting the point.

"Ok, everyone. Lets get to it. I'm tired of waiting." Buffy says, in command.

"Set's going down!"

Buffy and Faith are walking home. It's pretty obvious there's some tension between them.

"What was that about?" Buffy asks, breaking the silence, "what were you doing back there?"

" Ummm… sorry, B? I don't get ya?" Faith says, feigning innocence.

"Yeah, right" Buffy says, " next you're gonna tell me you're going out for the cheerleading squad?"

"Don't ya think I'd be cute in a short skirt, shakin' my pom-poms?" Faith says, mockingly.

" Knock it off, Faith. Cute banter is my province" Buffy says, " Why'd you do that? Do you want Tara to know that I'm gonna probably have to kill Will?" Buffy says, upset.

" I can't let you do it, B" Faith says, simply.

" You can't let me do it?" Buffy says, incredulous, " what does that mean?".

" I can't let you kill her, B" Faith says, " You got no idea what it'll do to you".

" Faith, lets get this straight, " Buffy says, " It's not a choice. If it's too late to save Willow, then I've got to kill her. I can't let Set have her body, no matter if it kills Will, what's left of her. You know that, I know that. I think even Will knows that."

"That's not what I'm saying, B" Faith says, quietly, " I can't let YOU kill her. I'll have to do it".

"No" Buffy says, firmly. " that's not what's gonna happen."

" B, you don't understand" Faith says.

" I do understand, Faith" Buffy replies, " I got it. Will is probably going to die". Buffy bites her lip to keep the emotions in check.

Faith turns to Buffy, grabbing her by the arms, so she can't move. Her face is hard, resolute.

" No, you don't understand, B. And I'm not gonna let you understand!" Faith says, her voice sounding like it's coming from her gut, "You have no idea what it's like to take a life. I do , B. I do. I've killed a few people in my life. Not demons, not vampires, B. People. Living, breathing people!"

" I nearly killed you, Faith" Buffy says, her own face hard. She's not going to let Faith do this.

" Nearly. Almost. Not quite. Not dead, B. I'm still walking around." Faith's voice is nearly as hard as her face, " I'm not buried 6 feet under, so you haven't a clue. Sure, you've got guilt over stabbing me, B. I know that" Faith says, quietly, almost gently, " I wish you'd get over it, but that's a different story. You've never seen the look in someone's eyes as their dying, truly dying. Never seen the spark of life extinguish. Never seen the fear on their faces as they realize their time is over. Never had the sleepless night, trying to reconcile the guilt you feel. You become hardened to it, because you have to , or you go crazy. You lose something B, something you'll never get back. No matter how much penance you pay. No matter how long ago, you never forget. Every day you're reminded that you've crossed the line, a line you can't cross back. It's over for you, you've lost the innocence. You're heart becomes calloused; you're human feelings are blunted. Each successive time, it becomes easier… and it doesn't. You see it over and over again, it haunts you. Their eyes, their faces are with you forever. You begin to believe what they say, that you're evil. That you're worthless, no good, a monster. I'm sorry, B. I can't let you do it. I won't let you do it."

" Faith, you don't understand" Buffy says, " You've killed some people. I know that. I know it eats at you. I've heard you in your sleep. But they were strangers, Faith. They weren't people you knew. I nearly killed you, Faith. I nearly killed someone I knew. I saw the look in your eyes when you thought you were gonna die. I saw the betrayal you felt. I saw the hopelessness, the disbelief. As if you couldn't quite get that someone you knew stuck the knife in you, betrayed you. That haunts me, Faith. I see that every day. Along with you in a coma. I see that every day too. The fear that you'd never wake up, or wake up so brain damaged you couldn't understand anything. Be a veg. I live with that thought ever day. When I look at you, I don't just see you as you are now. I see you as you were then, on that rooftop. Ready to kill me, and then dying. And falling off into the truck. And in the hospital, lying there helpless, alone. You think I don't know, Faith? You're wrong. You wonder why I didn't fight going to prison harder? Do you really wonder why? Because… I DESERVED IT, FAITH. Because of what I did. I deserved to be there, I should still be there. Because, Faith, it wasn't simple assault with a deadly weapon. It so wasn't self defense. It was attempted murder, and NOT for the reason I say. The reason I tell everyone. I didn't need you for Angel. I cured Angel, and lived. Somehow I knew that , back of my mind. No, I tried to murder you, because you betrayed ME. You went over to the enemy, without a care. You left me, you hurt ME, Faith. I wasn't jealous of you and Angel. I knew you were using him, you didn't give a rat's ass about him. You wanted to hurt me with him. No, I was jealous of Richard Wilkins. Why? Because he had you're loyalty, your trust, and you're devotion. You loved him, and you DIDN'T LOVE ME. And I couldn't stand it. I couldn't stand it one little bit. So, I wanted to kill you that night, Faith. I wanted to. To hurt you back for hurting me!" Buffy's voice is low, dry and raspy, " I hated you Faith, not because you hated me. But because you didn't care!"

Faith is stunned. She's never realized the depth of Buffy's feelings, nor how long she's had them. Faith knew from the first, at least on her end, something was there. She wasn't going to admit it… Buffy had been so harsh to her. So down on her, and her methods all the time. Faith hadn't realized…had she been too young?… that it was a cover. That Buffy was feeling something too… something she couldn't understand, couldn't deal with. It suddenly occurred to Faith that maybe that was what the day… the day they had the picnic…that's what that was about. That Buffy wanted to try to reach out to her. Faith so hadn't gotten it, and Buffy had been too conflicted to do more, be more upfront. Soon after that, it all went to hell.

' she's been carrying this around for years. Even in prison, she…oh, god, that explains Glennie. Glennie's nuts about Buffy, that's clear. But Buffy couldn't see her…because of me. Damn me, why didn't I see this before?'

Faith wonders if … she'd known, or figured it out, if things would've been different. She can't help but think they might have been. That's all Faith ever really wanted. Someone to love. She was right there, and I was too blind to see her. Damn. DAMN.

All this has gone through Faith's mind in a brief second. She turns to Buffy, and sees how the years have changed her. She's no longer the little cheerleader with the soft cheeks, the sweet eyes and the ready smile. She's become lean and tough. She's already lost her innocence, and Faith didn't get it til just this moment.

"Faith" Buffy continues, her voice remorseful, " I… did wrong. I screwed up. I … hurt you, tried to kill you. I lied to myself, told myself it had to be done. But it didn't. I …wronged you. And Will. She wouldn't… if it wasn't for me, she wouldn't be … I never should have let her get involved. I never should have involved her in this. She was an innocent, Faith. A civilian. She shouldn't pay for what I am. She got into witchcraft because of me. To help me fight. She shoulda gone away, far away to college. She shoulda had a normal life… and I screwed that up for her. Now she's gonna die" Buffy says, as if it's set in stone," She's gonna die, and I'm gonna have to do it… kill her" Buffy stops, staring at the ground.

"B…" Faith starts, coming to comfort her. Buffy waves her off.

"No, you don't … no!" Buffy says, moving away. " You want to help me. You want to protect me. I … God, I love you for that" Buffy says, her voice, her face sincere." But you can't, Faith. You can't. It's too late to protect me." Buffy stares off into space, the 1000 yard stare. " You can't do it, Giles can't do it… no one but me. I've gotta do it. It's my punishment, don't you see?" Buffy says, as if it's all perfectly logical and clear, and that Faith should get it, " I've got to kill her to stop … this thing. But it won't be that thing that haunts my dreams. It'll be Will, dying. Every day I'll see her… the look of hurt and pain and betrayal in her eyes. I'll see the life ebb out of her, I'll see her stop seeing. Every day, I'll see this…because it's right. Because it's my fault". Buffy looks at Faith, her eyes empty, " It's my punishment".

"For what, B? I was evil. Lets get this clear. I was with the Mayor, I woulda killed you, your friends, the whole town." Faith says, her tone harsh." That was you're fault. Tell me, B, how was that your fault?" Faith stops, waits for a response. Nothing is coming. " Didn't think so. And Willow? Did you put a gun to her head? Did you say" Willow, do magic or die?" Faith waits again. No response. " Right. Buffy, people do things they want to do. You can't stop them. You can't follow after them, and wipe their noses when they bleed. They do stuff, right or wrong, because… they do. It's their doing, not yours. It's their responsibility, not yours. You can't take the whole worlds wrongs on, and take the blame every time someone does something stupid. You just can't, B, without going bonkers". A sound, logical argument. It's too bad Buffy isn't listening to logic.

" You're… just wrong, Faith" Buffy says, not listening, " I could've stopped it. I could've tried harder with you, I could've found a way to get through to you, but I didn't. I could've stopped Will. I could've stopped her and Xander from being involved, but I didn't. I didn't, and now it's come home to roost. I'm the slayer, Faith. My job, calling, whatever the hell you want to call it, is to protect the innocent from the forces of darkness… and I've so failed."

" You didn't listen to one word I said, Buffy. You're not everybody's mommy. You can't protect them all from themselves. It's impossible, no one can do it!" Faith says." It's foolish to think you can!"

" But I can protect my friends" Buffy says, quietly, " I can protect the ones I love."

"B, stop it! You're … you're still in prison. In your mind. You've been free, your body anyway, for a year. And still, your mind is still in prison. You keep punishing yourself over your imagined sins. You gotta stop it, Buffy. You've paid… more than paid…for any wrongs you might've done!"

"No, Faith, no" Buffy says, quietly. She begins to walk away. She gets half a block, and calls back, " Not until I've atoned". She turns, and continues walking into the darkness.

Faith watches her. She can't understand this massive guilt Buffy is carrying around like stone on her back. It's just not right. She won't let Buffy do it. She won't let her add to the guilt. She'll stop her someway, and do it herself. Buffy saved her life. If not for her, Faith knows she'd be in prison… and she couldn't survive there. She'd die… or kill others. So she's not going to let Buffy take the fall for this. Not this time

She couldn't. Not and live with herself.

A lone figure stands on Hillman's Bluff overlooking Sunnydale.

He is strangely dressed. He looks more like a medieval knight than anything else. He leans on his broadsword, the tip touching the earth before his feet. He looks out over the town of Sunnydale, his face contemplative.

" This is where our God has led us. He calls us here, to fight for him. There are those below that'll need our help. He calls upon us to lend our aid" The knight ponders. " How will it turn out? Only our God knows! " He kneels by his sword, swearing his fealty to his God. He stands, and rejoins the band of men he's with. He confers with them, and they turn, riding off into the night.

It's approaching the twilight of the next day.

In the ruins of Sunnydale High, a group of figures are moving about, setting preparations. They have set the blessed urns at the proper intervals, and are now painting the ruins close to the entrance with the sacred glyphs. Soon, the master will join them, after the sun has set. There is a buzz of activity, as the celebrants are preparing the way for their dark lord to return to this mortal plane. If all goes as foretold, this will be the last sunset. The cursed orb will be cast down as it should be, according to their master. The darkness, the night will rule. The hellmouth shall be opened, and the Old Ones will again inhabit the earth, destroying the plague of humanity that infects it.

The sacraments for the ritual are brought to the fore. Three people, bound and unconscious, are laid before the makeshift altar. The blood of a virgin(not easy to come by in these times), the Horn of Azrael, the uncorrupted heart of a warrior, packed in ice, and the bones of a child are placed close at hand. The Crook of Set, his scepter, is prepared for his arrival. Taking the blood, two of the celebrants draw a sacred circle around the altar, creating a holy place for their lord to rise to his full power. Once this has occurred, the ritual for the opening of the hellmouth shall begin.

Across the way, hidden behind trees in the park, Giles, Xander, Anya and Tara, along with the slayers watch over the preparations. They've made some of their own, unbeknownst to the Cabal. The fight will soon be joined, once Set, in the body of Willow arrives. Spike, who despite his little fit in the magic box, wouldn't miss this for the world, and Angel, will arrive when the sky is a bit less light.

As the sun hits its nadir ,and the sky blackens, Spike and Angel make their appearance. They come from opposite directions, and upon seeing each other, make for the opposite ends of the group.

"So, are we ready to go?" Angel asks the group.

" We're just waiting for Set to make his appearance" Faith says, " Evidently he's not fond of daylight, either."

"Yes, well… God of Darkness and Chaos… kind of a tip off there" Spike says, looking over at the preparations ongoing across the street. "What are those bleeding sods doing, anyway?"

"Making nice for the arrival of his nastiness" Buffy says, watching. Something is bothering her." Kinda funny though, don't you think? I mean, these guys have been pretty much prepping everything behind the scenes. Real hush-hush. Now all of a sudden, everything's all out in the open.

" Well, it is their big moment" Giles mentions, " They probably figure that there's no more reason to hide what their doing".

"Speaking of preparations, are we all ready to go?" Buffy asks, looking around at the group. There is a general nod of assent. "Tara? You're spells. Are you ready with them?"

"Y-yes, just need to mix the ingredients." Tara says, working away at her magic." T-Thinking I want to wait til they are involved with their own rituals, so their mages won't sense the spell".

"Good thinking" Buffy praises her, " Xander? The lights. Are the positioned as we talked about?"

" Yup, Buff. All in place, and camouflaged. Got people standing by to activate them" He says, holding up a walkie-talkie.

"Great!. Now…everybody has weapons. We might have to do a little fighting… not too much, but enough to keep them off balance until…" Buffy's interrupted by Spike.

" Ummm… slayer? Was there a parade scheduled for this evening?" He asks, looking down the street.

" Huh?" Buffy asks, coming over to Spike. He points where he's been looking.

Buffy looks down the street, and there is Willow/Set walking towards the abandoned high school. She's followed by what must be nearly 100 demons, vampires and a horde of less desirable beings. Her heart sinks into her stomach.

" Oh, crap!"

To be continued

Next: the battle is joined!