Chapter 5
The weeks passed, and the four housemates began to settle into a routine. When Tulah got back from work (Remus had lost his job again, and stayed at the flat with Sirius and Cassie most days), they took it in turns to cook supper, spent an hour or so afterwards arguing over possession of the TV remote, then went to bed.
Remus and Cassie continued stubbornly with their nighttime coffees, insisting that 'caffeine helps you sleep!'
The foursome visited Lily and James every few days so Sirius could bring them up to date on the Rosier case details, which Tulah picked up for him from the Ministry every so often.
Tulah asked Lily no more about her confession in the bathroom, but she could tell that James had not been enlightened. On the other hand, Lily's hands were forever drifting protectively towards her stomach; it could not be long before he figured it out for himself.
Other than this, Lily and James were taking their incarceration well, often making light of their predicament and teasing Sirius about his role as secret-keeper.
"Betrayed us at all today?" James asked casually.
Sirius laughed and shook his head, shooting James a wounded glance when he thought no one was looking. "Not funny," he mouthed. James looked contrite.
"Sorry," he muttered, when they were out of hearing. "But, you know, if you can't laugh what can you do?"
Sirius had to agree.
Two months or so later, they were all at James and Lily's when there was a knock at the door. Sirius went to open it, wand out; they had become wary lately, with rumours of the Dark Lord's following spreading like flames licking at their heels.
Professor Dumbledore stood in the doorway, looking older and more worn than Sirius had ever seen him. The light which usually twinkled from behind his half-moon glasses seemed to have gone out.
"Going to knock me out, Mr Black?" he asked wearily, with a shadow of his old smile. "Is Cassiopeia with you?" He peered past the door and into the room beyond; Cassie was sitting by the window, playing wizard chess with Lily. Remus was curled up beside her on the sofa, reading a book and leaning lightly on her left arm, and Tulah and James were poring over the latest Daily Prophet, discussing the Quidditch articles with some asperity.
Cassie caught sight of Dumbledore, and her face drained of colour. She stood abruptly, causing Remus to sit up dazedly, rubbing his head.
"Where'd my headrest go?" he asked with a sleepy smile; then he too saw his old headmaster, and fell silent.
Dumbledore stepped past Sirius, who closed the door quietly and came to sit by Cassie. Tulah, James and Lily crowded round.
"Might I talk with Cassie in private?" Dumbledore wondered aloud.
Remus raised his eyebrows. "I think I speak for all of us when I say that whatever you have to say to Cassie concerns us too," he commented dryly.
Everyone looked at Cassie, who licked her lips nervously and glanced at Dumbledore.
"Albus? Is it-?"
Dumbledore nodded gravely. Cassie gave a little cry and fell back onto the couch, breathing rapidly, tears pooling in the corners of her eyes. Suddenly she looked wild, frightened, and very, very alone. Her eyes flickered from one person to another, as if looking for a means of escape.
Lily stood up angrily, James at her back. "What's going on?" she demanded.
Cassie winced at her harsh tone, and shrank a little further into her seat. Remus put a comforting arm around her shoulders without really noticing what he was doing, and was astonished when she stiffened in his grip. He let go instantly, taken aback, and shot a surprised sideways glance at her. She had gone deathly pale, and was shivering slightly.
It had never occurred to him that his touch could instil such dread, and especially not in Cassie. He'd thought…he'd thought she trusted him. He stared at the floor, overwhelmed.
"Cassiopeia. Do you want me to…tell them?" Dumbledore sounded suddenly doubtful, and that scared Cassie more than anything ever had.
The world seemed to shrink until all that was left was Dumbledore and herself, surrounded by a sea of whiteness that seemed somehow outside her consciousness.
"You realise what it would require, telling them?" he queried earnestly.
He looked at her with those bright eyes, questioning. She felt the weight of the memories press in and peered anxiously into the sea of white, afraid that they might catch up with her. Thankfully, her surroundings remained blissfully blank.
Voices swam through the mist; disembodied, discordant and somehow surreal.
"Tell us what?"
"What's going on?"
"What's wrong?"
"Cass."
A calmer voice, a touch on her shoulder; gentle, and somewhat hesitant. It could only be one person…
Even thinking about Remus pushed the mists back, lifting the burden of memories from her shoulders. His face swam into focus. It was inches from her own. She looked into his azure eyes and drew a long, slow, soothing breath.
"Ok."
Dumbledore looked gravely around the circle of faces and then back to Cassie. Remus' grip on her shoulder tightened.
Cassie leaned into the curve of his arm, her fear of his touch evaporating. She nodded to Dumbledore, who began.
"In order to tell you Cassiopeia's story I must explain a few things to you."
A slight frown creased his forehead, as if he was uncertain of where to begin. "Some of the memories that Cassiopeia has of her childhood are…well, less than pleasant," he admitted abruptly. "For this reason I performed a complex charm on her which locked some of the memories inside her away. It is not the same as the Obliviate spell because she is still in possession of the memories, although she alone has no access to them. With Cassiopeia's permission," he glanced at her for confirmation, and she nodded shakily, "I will perform Legilimency on her, which is the only way to penetrate the charm and release her memories."
As soon as he stopped speaking, questions were fired from all sides.
"Why can't you tell us?" James asked.
"Yeah, why all the Legilimency?" Lily added, backing James up as usual.
"Won't Legilimency make Cassie relive it?" Tulah inquired, looking confused.
"If you locked her memories up," Remus interjected quietly, "Why is she still afraid?"
Dumbledore held up his hands, looking overwhelmed. "So many questions!" he exclaimed. "Well, it is nice to see that Hogwarts has raised some inquisitive minds. In answer to your questions, Cassiopeia still knows about her past in general; it is merely the…details, shall we say, she asked me to obscure. Which is why she is, as you so aptly put it, Mr. Lupin, still…afraid." He paused, turning gravely to Remus, and then found his thread again. "And to reply to Mr. Potter and Miss. Evans' questions, the charm I mentioned - to lock her memory – requires also the dispersion of the memories of the perpetrator."
"So, to close Cassie's memories, you also locked your own?" Sirius queried. He wanted this clear.
"Exactly. Which means that to show you what happened – and to see for myself, for that matter – I must use Legilimency." He paused, looking sad worried and somehow very, very old. "And I am sorry to say that it will indeed force Cassiopeia to relive her darkest moments." He was silent again for a while. "Very sorry indeed," he added softly, almost to himself.
Remus had felt Cassie grow still beside him, then tremble, whilst Dumbledore was speaking. She had not stopped shaking throughout the speech, and now he could feel her throat working as she swallowed back her fear. She was braver than he could have imagined, whatever this past of her was, and the thought of what she was going to put herself through made him speak up.
"Why do we need to do this?" he questioned heatedly. "Why isn't the 'past in general' enough? How come she has to go through this?"
"The Shadow Man has burst his chains," Dumbledore said cryptically, "and he is looking for Cassiopeia as we speak. It is necessary for you all to understand the gravity of the situation – and for that, you must see what he is capable of." He sighed sadly. "I fear that I have protected Cassiopeia for too long. For her mind to truly heal, she must come to terms with her memories – and for that, she needs to confront them. Now that circumstances have made it essential, I merely felt it best that she should do so in the company of her friends."
He looked around at the assembled adults, and some of the glint returned to his blue eyes. They seemed to have unconsciously drawn closer around Cassie, as if to protect her from whatever danger was lurking. Remus' arms had crept around her waist; on her other side, Lily was squeezing her hand reassuringly. James and Sirius were perched on opposite arms of the sofa, with Tulah leaning against Sirius and James' hand on Lily's shoulder. Despite the horrifying task that lay before him, Dumbledore felt some of his old spirit return. If they were all willing to support her like this, then perhaps there was still hope for Cassiopeia.
"Well," he said, breaking the silence that had fallen and making Tulah jump. "I had better begin. Will you all gather around please, and touch your wands to mine." They obeyed, round-eyed and apprehensive of what was to come. Cassie sat opposite them, alone.
"The Shadow Man is no longer truly human," Dumbledore continued in a murmur. "But when he was, he went by the name Luke Chase…"
For a split second Remus could see Cassie's face draining of colour, before Dumbledore extinguished the lights with a wave of his hand, raised his wand to shoulder height, pointed it at Cassie and barked, "Legilimens!"
Well that is all i have...i have some ideas, but they may take a while to fall into place so next time i update in a month or so it will be a little slower...still, bear with me. lol
f-e-e