"Jeeze," Lily said, moaning. She dropped the box that was in her arms and stood up to stretch her back. She grimaced when she heard it crack. "What does James have in these boxes? A million different hard-cover books?"

"No," Sirius answered from his place on the floor. He was stuck opening up his 'boyfriend's' boxes. "More likely an extensive porno collection." Seeing Lily's grossed-out expression he laughed an continued ripping open the box in front of him. "Don't worry. You're probably right about the whole book collection. James reads a lot."

Lily nodded, relieved that Sirius was just kidding. "He strikes me as the type that does." She smiled wistfully. "One reader can always find out a fellow reader. Kind of like that neurotic people theory."

Sirius looked up at that one. "You mean where if you put two neurotics in a room, they're find each other?" He nodded his head like it made sense. "That must be how James and I met."

Lily laughed, and headed out into the hallway. She came back empty handed. "Looks like that's the end of the pile. No more obnoxiously heavy boxes for me to carry in." Sirius laughed again and looked down at what had taken up so much space in his friend's box. He was surprised to see the multiple picture frames.

Lily, looking over his shoulder, was surprised too. "Wow," she said pointing towards the picture on the top. Sirius jumped at her voice; he hadn't seen nor heard her come up behind him. "You guys must have been really young there."

It was a picture of James and Sirius, both of their arms around each other. They looked remarkably the same, with messy black hair and their expressions. The only thing amiss about the picture were the other two people in the picture. One was male, the other female.

"Who are they?" Lily asked. She looked at the raven haired girl to the brunette, sickly looking boy.

She didn't see Sirius swallow. "That's Jamie," he said, picking up the picture. Lily wasn't sure if he was talking about the boy or the girl, but knew she'd find out soon enough. She wasn't disappointed. "James's twin sister. They were inseparable." Lily noted the sound of his voice, and knew right away that she was dead.

"And that's our other friend from school." He shook his head as if to rid himself of his thoughts, and put the picture back down in the box. He carefully closed the box and called for James. He came rushing out of his new bedroom.

He smiled broadly as he rushed out of the bedroom. He was wearing a pair of loose blue jeans and a green T-shirt. He wiped a drop of sweat from his forehead. "Hey you guys," he said, squatting down on the ground. "You should see the view from my new room! Well, not you Lily," he said, a thought coming to him, "you've already seen it."

Lily didn't return his smile, and even though he hadn't known her very long, he knew that something was upsetting her. He looked from between her to Sirius. "Ok, what's going on? Did Sirius say something stupid about my choice in underwear?"

She managed a small, sad smile, before heading towards the door. "I'm going to go see if you left anything in my car, OK?" It seemed like she couldn't get out of the room fast enough. "I'll just be a mom- I'll just be right back."


She was just to the front door when her escape route was cut off. Melissa walked into the door, looking pissed-off as usual. She was wearing a pair of baggy jeans and had a jacket on over another green sweater. She scowled at everyone in the room. "Looks like everyone started this joyous occasion without me. I feel heartbroken."

"What crawled up your butt?" Sirius asked, half-joking. He had confided in James a week earlier that he didn't really like Melissa.

Melissa didn't seem to find his humor, if indeed she even tried looking for it. She glared at him. "I could ask you the same question, only I'm pretty sure that I already know." Her glare was switched from him to James.

Sirius got up to defend his 'boyfriend'. In fact, his mouth was open, ready to make a cutting remark, when Melissa gave a little huff and stormed out of the room. She slammed the door behind her so hard that one of the pictures over the fireplace shook and almost fell off of the mantle.

Lily looked between James and Sirius and walked to her bedroom, her sadness that was triggered by the picture of James's twin and the other friend momentarily forgotten. She opened the door without knocking and softly closed it behind her.

Then there were only two left in the front room. James looked to Sirius and picked up the box that had given Lily so much trouble in one sweep. "Best get these into my room." Sirius nodded and followed suit. They had all of the boxes in James' new bedroom when there was a knock on the front door.

For a moment, James was still, not sure what he should do. Where there was another knock on the door, and there was no motion from inside Melissa's bedroom from either of the two girls, James sighed and headed towards the door, Sirius following behind him. James threw open the door without bothering to look through the peep-hole. Who they saw surprised him.

He was tall with shaggy brown hair and light blue eyes. He was wearing a pair of rumpled blue jeans and a tie-dye T-shirt. He held a coffee mug in his hand. Seeing who opened the door, he stood back a step and looked at the number over the door. The letters still read 295, and seeing them, the man put a smile on his face and asked, "Where's Lily?"

James was still so surprised that all he could manage was a little grunt and to point towards Melissa's bedroom.

The man nodded his head. "Oh, I see. Well, um.. I'm kind of looking for some sugar. Got some cookies to make for this girl I like down at the lib-." A thought occurred to him. "Who the Hell are you guys?"

James came out of his stupor as soon as he heard 'guys'. He looked behind him to see Sirius with the same dumb-struck expression on his face. Without answering his question James leapt upon the man and gave him a bear hug. "Remus!"

The man - Remus, as it were- pried James' arms off of him. "Hey man! What are you doing. Who are you?"

Sirius was grinning. "James, man, I don't think ol' Remus recognizes us." He dragged James over to him and threw his arm around his shoulders. Both of them grinned over at their old friend. "Now do ya recognize us, Moony?"

Remus blinked a few times as if he couldn't quite believe it. "James.... Sirius?! Is it really you?"

"In the flesh, brother."

James and Sirius' friend gave them both a hug that rivaled James's. "Man, has it been long! I haven't seen nor heard from you since.. what.... three years ago? What have you guys been up to? And what the Hell are you guys doing here? You still haven't answered my earlier question. Oh, and did you guys know that I live right down the hall? Man, this is amazing! I can't believe I'm really seeing you guys. It's been so long! What have you guys been up to? Oh.. I already asked that. Well, why aren't you guys answering my questions?"

All James and Sirius could do was stare at Remus, their mouths agape. "Whoa..." Sirius said, blinking. "Remus, I know you're half-dog - so am I, don't forget- but you're just being a tad bit hyper, don't ya think? You're practically jumping up and down wagging an imaginary tail."

"I am not!"

He was.

"Fine!" He exclaimed, realizing what the looks the pair were sending him meant. "Excuse me if I'm happy to see the best friends I've ever had after three years. I'm just happy is all."

Sirius laughed. "More like hyper-active and drunk, if you ask me. But since you didn't," he grinned, "I guess it's best if we answered your questions." He led his two friends over to the sofa in the middle of the living room. They sat down and got comfortable. "Well.. where to begin?"

"Well, I guess we should tell him about the fact that I'm the new roommate, right? That's answers about half of his questions." He winked at Remus. "And as for what we've been up to, I guess I should-" He was interrupted by one of his roommates.

"Oh great," Melissa groaned, "the gays have become friends with the neighbors. Isn't this just great, Lily?"

Remus let out a sputtering laugh. "James Potter and Sirius Black, gay? Why that's the most-"

James let out a nervous laugh. "incredible thing I've ever heard!" After James finished Remus' statement, he dragged Remus out into the hall, Sirius following at his heals. "I'll be back in a moment!" He shouted over his shoulder to Lily, who was shocked at the turns of events, and Melissa, who was just glaring.

Out in the hallway, James propped Remus up against the hallway wall, right underneath a 100 watt light bulb.

"Hey man," Remus said, shielding his eyes. "What is this all about? My eyes are freakin' killing me. And what's with Melissa and Lily saying you're gay? And why did you drag me out here? Jesus, that light bulb is burning out my retinas. What the Hell is going on?"

In front of him, Sirius laughed. "If there was one thing I forgot, Moony, it was that you asked a lot of questions when you're nervous.. or excited." He looked down at the front of Remus' pants. "You haven't wet yourself, have you?"

"No, you ass!" He looked between him to James. "Or asses, I'm not quite sure. Now will one of you please answer my questions? I'm wondering if you guys really are gay- Sirius' looking at the front of my pants kind of grossed me out a bit."

It was James' turn to laugh. "Don't worry Remus. There will be no need for you to bring pepper-spray whenever you come over to the apartment. Sirius and I aren't really gay."

Remus took this without question; at school they had some many girlfriends it made your head spin. "Then why the Hell are Mel and Lily saying that you are? And don't lie."

"I wasn't about to," James answered. "The reason they think Sirius and I are gay is.. well.. because when I looked at the place, Lily said that she wouldn't be comfortable with having a 'male roommate'. So.. I kind of told her that I was gay to make her feel better- the apartment is awesome, as you can plainly see.

"Anyway, this left me with the problem of having to find a 'boyfriend'. Naturally, I picked Sirius. I've only been here for about two months, and I haven't really met any men. Right, well, Lily told me that she wanted to meet my boyfriend, just as a little test, I gather. Well, Sirius being Sirius -or not serious, I guess. Forgive the pun- managed to screw it all up. First he spills whine on Melissa, which I think was purposeful, and then starts to mop it up.. In a public place, nonetheless! And then his ex-girlfriend comes up and drops whine on his lap. Leave to Sirius to get a girlfriend the first month we're in the States. So then Melissa and Lily were wondering who the Hell that bitch was- Melissa said that, not me. So then Sirius said that it was his ex-girlfriend!"

"Well, she was!" Sirius answered, ready to defend himself.

"That wasn't part of the plan, dumbass. Anyway, Sirius forgot that we were supposed to be gay, and this left Melissa to have some questions. So, naturally, the only thing for Sirius to say was that he was Bi-sexual. And ever since then, Melissa and Lily have been on our cases. Sirius nearly cost me the apartment."

"Oh yea," Remus said after a long silence. "You guys are both definitely asses. Do you guys even realize what position this puts you guys in?" He shook his head. "You guys never did think what could or would happen in regard to your actions. Jesus, you guys really fucked up this time."

Sirius glared down at him. "Well, at least I didn't overanalyze everything. I actually lived while we were at school."

Remus glared back at him. "There was no way I could live during school. Or have you forgotten that I'm a freakin' werewolf?"

Sirius opened his mouth, probably to say something uncaring about that statement, like, 'You shouldn't have let that hold you back', but James cut him off. "Anyway, now we're in another jam."

"Oh, really?" Sirius asked, switching his anger over to James. "You finally realize how hopeless this is?"

"No," James answered, not in the least bothered by Sirius' anger; he had had it focused on him before. "How are we going to explain how we know about Remus?" They all stewed over this for a while until James came up with, "What if we tell those two that we know you from school? That's possible."

"No it's not," Remus answered. "Lily went to Hogwarts, or did you not know that?" He took in their silence. "I'm gonna go out on a limb here and take that as a 'yes'." He shook his head. "James, you still play guitar?"

James nodded slowly. "Yea... what of it?"

"Oh, nothing, don't worry. We could tell them that we met during a talent search or audition or something. That could work."

James smiled and gave Remus another bone-crushing hug. "Remus, you're a genius!"

Remus patted him on the back. "Yes, I know I am. But I won't let it rain over you."

"You're also incredibly modest."

Remus laughed and pushed James away. "Great, well, glad we got this covered. I think it's best that we go back inside- I really do need that sugar. I have to bake those cookies."

"Tell me about this girl, Moony. It must be pretty serious if you're already baking for her."

"It's not all that serious," he told him, laughing. "I just like her is all. Her name is Austynne and she's got the most gorgeous eyes. We met at the library a couple weeks ago, and we've gotten to know each other pretty well- I'm going to ask her out. Well, after she breaks up with her boyfriend. He's such an ass....."

****

At eleven o'clock that evening all five of them sat in the living room, tired out of their minds. Well, except for Melissa. She was just crabby. " I can't believe that you had seven boxes full of books, James," Melissa told him, using his giving names for the first time the entire day. "I never knew you read a lot."

He shrugged, then realized that he didn't want to do that since his shoulders hurt so much. Putting all seven boxes of his books up on their proper shelves was a lot of work. "I don't as much as I did when I was younger." He shared a look with Remus and Sirius and then cracked up laughing. "Ok, so I do read more now than I did when I was younger. When I was at school, you couldn't pay me to pick up a book."

"Oh," Lily said, settling back into the pillows at the back of the couch. "If you saw me while I was at school, you would.. well, actually, I don't think you'd be able to." She gave a little laugh. "I was always reading; my friends couldn't pry me out of a book."

Not long after Remus has told him about Lily going to Hogwarts James got a good look at her a realized how she had seemed so familiar to him. While at school, Lily Evans had been somewhat of a joke between the better-off students. She was overweight and short, with this mop of red hair and green eyes that looked about a million times too big for her face behind the giant glasses she wore. James himself had worked with her as Head Boy, and wondered at how he couldn't place her the first time they met.

He was also very surprised at the fact that she didn't remember who he or Sirius was. They were two of the more popular students at Hogwarts, Remus and Jamie included. Although Remus and Jamie were better known for the fact that they had dated for all seven years at School.

Jamie...... No, he wasn't going to think about that. Not here and now, when everyone was getting along so well. He wasn't going to ruin this evening.

James was only thankful for the fact that Lily didn't know about Jamie. That would have been a dead giveaway that James and Sirius weren't telling the truth. If she knew, Lily could tie Jamie with James and then know the truth about him and Sirius. And then he would get kicked out of the apartment. And he couldn't risk that.

"....guitar, James?"

Hearing his name, James looked over towards Remus who was smiling at him. "What? Sorry, I didn't hear you."

"I said, why don't you play all of us your guitar?"

James quirked an eyebrow. As soon as the three of them had stepped into the apartment earlier, the first thing out of Melissa's mouth was, "What the Hell is going on?" James used his acting skills through good use and told her that they had just been catching up. It wasn't a lie, not exactly, but Melissa must have known something was up because she asked how they knew each other.

James was thankful that Remus's idea about the audition had worked.

"Well, OK. What do you guys want to listen to?"

"Oh, Queen!" Everyone looked over at Lily and burst out laughing, Melissa laughing the hardest. James wondered how she could look so different while she was laughing.

James got up off of the ground. "Yea, let me just go and get it from my bedroom."

James' bedroom was the smallest of the three, but it was pretty large. On two of the walls there were floor-to-ceiling bookshelves that were now filled with books. On the wall that shared the door there was James' queen sized bed. The floors were wooden and everything color coordinated; the bedspread was maroon and gold, which went along very well with the floor.

The fact that his bedspread was Gryffindor colors had nothing to do with pride.

James grabbed his guitar case and headed out towards the living room. Sirius was telling a humorous story that had everyone in stitches. "...And then they made me their chief." Lily was on the floor, probably from falling off the couch, while laughing, and was practically rolling.

James sat down and waited for everything to quiet down. It took a good five minuets, but it happened. "Oh, hey man," Sirius said as James started to take out his guitar. "Didn't see ya there."

He smiled. "It's OK. I doubt anyone else saw me. Well, except for that fine ladies over there." He winked at Remus. Everyone started laughing all over again; everyone knew that Remus was as straight as they came. Well, not as 'straight' as Sirius, who would have a new girlfriend every week. But since they were pretending to be gay, they weren't supposed to know that.

"That was by far the grossest thing I've ever seen you do." Remus struggled with the next words. "What would your boyfriend think?"

"I don't know," Sirius said, chiming in. "But I know what I'm thinking. THREESOME!"

Everyone slowly backed away from Sirius... who promptly moved closer. "What do you say?"

"I say, 'Never in a million fucking years."

"I agree with Melissa," Remus said, smiling. "And I like to think that Lily agrees with, well, the both of us."

Lily gave a flirtation little smile and scooted closer to James. "Oh, I don't know, Remus. James is one very good looking man. So what if he's gay? I could change his ways." No one knew what to say, so they just gaped. Well, except for James. He was just blushing. Lily burst out laughing. "Oh my God. You should have seen your faces. Oh, it was priceless."

"Actually," Melissa said, " it was pretty freakin' gross. I'll never be able to look at you and James the same way again. A torrid love affair... with a gay man." She shook her head. "OK, so that was just nasty. Bad, bad thoughts." She smacked her head with the heel of her hand. Everyone started laughing again.

James was the first one to stop, so he started strumming his guitar and tuning it. It took him a while to realize that everyone was staring at him. "Um.. what?" He asked.

"Oh, nothing," Lily said. "It's just that you can actually play, you know? Like, you fell it.. or.. whatever." She gave a self-depreciating laugh. "Um. Never mind. That was just the writer inside of me trying to get out. Disregard that please."

"Um... sure." James started strumming his guitar. "So, what do you guys want to hear? I can play many different things from different genres. So, whatever you want, I can try. Well, unless is polka music." He pretended to gag. "I don't really do the whole, 'who stole the keeshka,' crap."

Lily laughed and leaned in closer. "I thought I already told you. I want to listen to Queen. I want to hear how good you are."

James shrugged. "I'm afraid you're going to be disappointed, but OK. What do you want to listen to? I know everything except for Bohemian Rhapsody. Can't do all of that harmony stuff with only one person."

Melissa nodded. "I can understand that. How about you sing... Play the Game? That was always my favorite."

James shrugged again and tried out some of the chords that he would need to use. He had to tune one, and then he was off, singing as if he was Freddie Mercury.

Open up your mind and let me step inside
Rest your weary head and let your heart decide
It's so easy when you know the rules
It's so easy all you have to do
Is fall in love
Play the game
Ev'rybody play the game of love

When you're feelin' down and your resistance is low
Light another cigarette and let yourself go
This is your life
Don't play hard to get
It's a free world
All you have to do is fall in love
Play the game ev'ryone play the game of love

My game of love has just begun
Love runs from my head down to my toes
My love is pumping through my veins (play the game)
Driving me insane
Come come come come play the game play the game play
The game play the game

Play the game everybody play the game of love

This is your life - don't play hard to get
It's a free free world all you have to do is fall in love
Play the game yeah play the game of love
Your life - don't play hard to get
It's a free free world all you have to do is fall in love
Play the game - ev'rybody play the game...

When it was over, no one knew what to say. "Wow..." Lily said, the green eyes wide. "That was... wow." That seemed to be the consensus.

"Um... thanks, you guys. I'm really not all that good, but-" He was cut off.

"Bullshit," Melissa said, glaring at him. "You know you're great, and still, you pretend to be modest, but I bet inside you're just bursting at the knowledge that you can wow a lot of people. And to that I only say, hypocrite." She then stormed out of the room and slammed the door much the same way she had earlier in the day. The only difference was that Lily didn't go after her. Instead, she sighed.

"Well, she took that way out of proportion." She got up to clean the cans of coke that were all over the floor and table. "I apologize. Her boyfriend broke up with her today, and she's just upset. " She then carried their cans over to the kitchen.

After a few moments of silence, James started to pack up his guitar, his good mood long gone. Was this what it was going to be like, living with two girls? Dear God, he hoped not.

****

Yay! I finally finished this chapter! It's not what I wanted it to be; it had started out as the second part of Lé Crunch. But.. I didn't like that so I just went a head with this. So yea. Hope you don't mind too much.

And thanxz to everyone who reviewed! I appreciate it! Here are the people that did.. and... um.. comments! YAY!! COMMENTSCOMMENTSCOMMENTS.

Oh, and just so I don't forget... Melissa isn't a bitch. Just.. bitchy! There's a difference.

Ok, NOW on with the comments:

Aus: Um.. I don't know why I you always say 'Off for More Pie'. But.. PIE PIE PIE PIE!!! PIIIIIIIIIIIIIIE!

Alysia: THANXZ! I had to have Melissa in there.. She's just a great character. I'll be getting into further details as the fic goes along. And James doesn't strike me as the 'gay type' either. That's why I put that in there.

Brit : Oh, thanxz! I hope you like my other works. They're all dramatically different. But that's A-OK! :P

i o u a name: Thanxz for reviewing! I love you fics! Anyhoo, I did make this chapter large/longer! It was eight pages before I added authors' notes and the such. Hope you like!

Nike25: Um.. did you want me to update She Went All The Way? 'Cause.. I did. After a long, long, LONG time, but I did. Yay, go me.

chewy1: Hmmm, must rent that movie. I rented How To Deal yesterday. That's a good movie as well... :P

pen-paper-action: Well, ok, so there isn't a second half to the last chapter. But... Um.. THERE'S THIS!

NiNaPoP: Thanxz! I appreciate it!

Julie38: It's not great, but thanxz anyways!

patrioticangel : You would be surprised at how many people say that. Thanxz for reviewing!

BREAKS INTO SONG AT RANDOM TIMES GIRL: Buwajajajajajaja. You fooled the system! Whooooo! You deserve an award or something.

little key: I honestly didn't know about the whole Three's Company thing until after I posted this. But ok, fine. BE THAT WAY!! j/k j/k

Remy's Gurl: I don't think that it's 'fucking hilarious',. I don't even try to be funny. Well, in this chapter I did. But.. well... I don't think it worked.

carameLisSa: Yay! Another Melissa! I love meeting other ones.. 'cause they're just SOOO hard to fine. :P

MarryMeJames: Um.. well.. sorry it took so long. ::sigh:: I've just had MAJOR writers' block. And.. um.. yea. Well.. I can't think of anything to say! NOOOOOO! This has never happened before! I AM DYYYYYYYYING!

That was slightly weird. Eh.

PeRkieGuRL: Thanxz Jenna!!

Agloechen; Eh, it was something to write.

The Spatula Chick: Finally, some criticism! THANK YOU!!!!!! I shall try to make your ideas to make this better come true!

Sarumia: Well, HERE YA GO!

Marissa Ann: Thanxz! And.. I posted. Do I get a brownie point?

lilynjamesAAF: Thanxz. I like to think I come up with weird ideas.

Starre: Honestly, I had no idea about the Three's Company thing. But if you want to believe that, that's A-OK with me.

Mistress of the Lake: yay! XP

B-a-B-i: I love that line too! I always use it.. 'cause I'm weird and such. Anyhoo, Sirius would make an awesome boyfriend! Don't cha think?

dolphingurl1: I posted! Yay, go me. :P

MonkeyGurl1: Waldo. Yes.. I vaguely remember. :P

Sakura : Thanxz! :D

aPPle-FrrEAk: Ewww! Drool! Don't you hate it when that happens? Anyhoo, no part two. Sorry.

Ok, well, THERE YA GO! I am done! The next chappy shall be up.. um.. IT WILL GET UP! Ok then. Anyhoo, I didn't use a beta for this chapter. But IT WILL GET BETAD! OK, glad we got that covered. WHAT DO YOU THINK!?

Melissa