GETTING UNHITCHED

I'd like to state for the record that I do not own a copy of the books. As such there are bound to be plenty of canonical errors (as well as all the other regular kind). Feel free to correct, shout or laugh at me. This is pure fluff, except when its not. Roger doesn't exist in this story.
Hope you enjoy - plotless.
Disclaimer : I do not own any of Tamora Piece's characters or settings. I just like to sneak into her toybox and play with them once in a while.

Thank you to Luthien RhiannonCat5, me, babymar-mar, maria, Anonymous miss, Lady Sandra of Ruatha, Tenshichild, thelastsilmaril for reviewing. }

Alanna walked into the dining hall that morning seething. She had had a very restless night plotting ways to get back at Thom, but none of her ideas were any good. She spotted a servant walking in front of her carrying a precariously balanced plate of food. An idea finally struck her.

Alanna walked up to the servant, "Excuse me," she said tapping him on the shoulder. The servant turned nearly dropping the plate he was carrying in the process. Alanna caught the side of it and steadied him. She smiled her politest smile, "Do you mind if I take this off your hands?" she asked pointing to the plate.
"Ummm…" the servant seemed lost for words and reluctant but Alanna knew he couldn't deny a Lady's request, no matter how strange. "Okay."
"Thank you," Alanna said taking the plate and smiling brightly.

Alanna began to walk over to where Thom was sitting at the table. It was really too bad that she was wearing such a long cumbersome gown. It was an accident waiting to happen she thought as she pretended to stumble. The plate of food flew out of her hand headed straight for Thom. Thom looked up and froze, not having time to react. Luckily for him Calisto, who was sitting near him, had faster reflexes. Her hands moved creating a spell, which hit the plate with such force it flew across the dining room and shattered on the opposite wall. Thom opened his mouth obviously ready to thank Calisto but Alanna interrupted him.

Standing and dusting of her gown Alanna glared at Calisto, "What did you do that for?" she hissed.
"What?" Calisto looked confused. Then Alanna's true motives seemed to dawn on her "Oh, well you should have told me. I thought it was just you tripping in those gowns of yours again. If I'd known you were trying to cream him, I wouldn't have saved him."

The grateful look on Thom's face turned to annoyance, "I guess I should say thanks. Not that your spell was very remarkable. It was actually a rather poor choice," he drawled.
"What do you mean 'poor'?" Calisto snarled.
"You could have made the plate hover before letting it gently to the ground instead of crashing it against the wall," Thom said obnoxiously.
"Please demonstrate how wonderfully you could have made the plate hover before letting it gently to the ground," Calisto pointed to another plate on the table.
"Uh…well," Thom faltered.
"You don't know the spell do you. Bet you just made all that stuff about hovering plates up. There isn't any such spell is there?" Calisto said triumphantly.
"I did not make it up," Thom said childishly. "I just can't remember it right now."
"Fine, then we'll go to the library and look it up," Calisto said bossily and began to walk out the dining hall head held high. She turned when she reached the door, "Well, are you coming."
"Coming!" Thom grumbled, getting up and sprinting after her.

Alanna watched them go then looked at the seat Thom had vacated next to Jonathan. She grinned and watched Jonathan shrink back in fear as she made her way over. He was obviously waiting for whatever agony she had in plan for him. She sat down enjoying the way Jonathan's fork, which was half way to his mouth, shook.

***

(3 weeks later)

Alanna walked into the stables with a bow and quiver of arrows slung over her shoulder. She was going to ride into the forest surrounding the palace to meet George. She wished Calisto would join her but lately she had been spending more and more time with Thom. They spent all day in the library looking up obscure spells and having philosophical discussions. Life was so boring without Calisto. There was no one around to help her fend of the Lords of the court or to back her up when she sparred verbally with Delia.

She had spent more time with the Ladies who had invited her to embroider with them after the Delia fiasco. Some of the opinions that she had held since childhood had undergone swift re-evaluation. Calisto was so interesting that she hadn't felt it necessary to make any other friends at the convent. At the palace she soon discovered that not all Ladies were obsessed with marriage, flower arranging and finding the perfect shade of material for a gown despite owning several similar colours.

She learnt that the conversations she witnessed between the Lords and Ladies at the balls were not simply meaningless flirtations but political moves in which a Lady could forward the views of herself and her husband, father or brother in between the fluttering of eyelashes. A woman could have a say in the way that Tortall was run if she used subtlety and intelligence.

Some of the Ladies who came from lands that lay close to the borders of Tortall which were frequently involved with skirmishes with the neighbouring countries even knew how to use bows and arrows. When Alanna had expressed her disbelief one of the Ladies had replied in a voice that was slightly harsh, " The women of my land learned long ago that those without swords may still die upon them." *

She especially liked a young Lady called Patricia. She had not met her in the Sewing Chambers but in the Library where Alanna had been looking for Calisto on Thom who had been as ever in search of some esoteric scroll or other. Patricia had a wicked sense of humour and could usually be found up to her elbows in books with dust and ink smeared across her cheeks and fingers. They also shared a common hobby. Avoiding the amorous Lords of the palace. Patricia did not want to take the chance of being married to a Lord who did not own any books, tomes or scrolls. After all she was already in heaven in the palace Libraries which had the largest collection of literature in Tortall and was only surpassed by the college in Carthak.

They had spent some interesting rainy day conversation, comparing methods of discouraging the Lords of the palace.

Unfortunately Patricia had been engrossed in translating a new scroll from Scanra.

Gary and Raoul had mumbled something about sparring and she hadn't even bothered to ask if she could go along as she knew the answer would be a resounding no. Her newfound appreciation of the Ladies at court did not extend to wanting to spend another morning practicing her needlepoint.

Jonathan who had quickly gotten over his momentary infatuation with Delia had disappeared early in the morning. Probably hiding from the many eminently suitable Ladies his mother seemed do keen on introducing him to.

Alanna smiled in anticipation when she came in sight of the Palace Stable. Alanna saddled her horse and led it out of the stable until she was out of sight. It would not do if anyone saw that she wasn't riding sidesaddle. She mounted the horse and guided it at a trot towards the forest. There was still an hour before she had to meet George but she could not spend another moment at the palace. She was going out of her mind with boredom. She reached the clearing at centre of the forest where George said they should meet and stopped, dismounting her horse. Removing her bow from the quiver on her back she decided that she could at least improve her archery since she was already here. She looked around and saw that she was standing in a clearing with apple trees all around her. They would make good targets she decided. Alanna raised her bow and pulled an arrow from the quiver on her back. She pulled the arrow back on the bowstring until it pressed hard against her nose {A/N I don't actually know how to do archery so I'm not sure if this is how you use the bow and arrow } She steadied her hand and focused on the target in front of her. Alanna let go of the arrow and watched it whistle threw the air towards her target. She whooped and jumped up and down as the apple fell to the floor. Perfect hit. After that the time past quickly. She was on her last arrow when she heard the bushes behind her rustling. Alanna spun around bow and arrow raised and ready, aiming it at the intruder. Alanna looked at the person who had just emerged from the bushes and paled. It was Jonathan.  Alanna tried to hide the bow behind her back.

She laughed nervously, "Jonathan. How good to see you?" she said with a false smile.
"Jeez." Jonathan said. "I know I played a prank on you, but trying to shoot me! Don't you think that's a bit much?" Then he burst out laughing.
"What?" Alanna said angrily. She didn't care if he was the prince. How dare he laugh at her?
"It's just that you look exactly like a little kid who's been caught stealing or doing something wrong," Jonathan said fighting back laughter.

"Calm down, I like the way you normally look," he added softly.

Alanna glared, tightened her grip on her bow and fired. The arrow whizzed past Jonathan missing his head by an inch and imbedded itself in an apple on the tree behind him. Alanna walked over and picked the apple of the tree.
"Want a apple?" she asked arrogantly holding it up for him to see.
Alanna saw a look of fear on his face. She grinned she was glad she'd scared him a little. That would teach him never to laugh at her again. Her grin vanished however when she saw that he wasn't looking at her.
"What's wrong?" she asked.
"Huge. Bear. Behind you," he stammered pointing behind her.
Alanna turned and saw the bear towering over her. She threw her bow away, crouched down, grabbed a dagger from inside her boot and rolled away from the bear, standing up next to Jonathan. Fight or flight? Alanna thought grinning to herself. Definitely fight.

Jonathan pushed Alanna behind him, "Stand back, I'll handle this," he said.
"I'm the one with the knife!" Alanna said incredulously.
She tried to step out from behind Jonathan as he pushed her back. They tripped and fell. Alanna landed on top of Jonathan. She was about to get up and fight the bear, when she heard some one rush out of the bushes and a few minutes later the bear scampered away. She got up and dusted herself of. She turned to thank whoever it was who had saved them and gasped.

"Thought you needed some help," George said grinning.
"I wanted to do that!" Alanna complained.
"You're welcome," George said sarcastically.
"Oh yes, thank you," Alanna said unfazed.
She heard someone clearing their throat behind them and turned to see Jonathan standing there looking at George questioningly.
"You know him?" Jonathan asked her.
"Yes. This is George. He's a friend. He works at the Dancing Dove an inn in the city. He's in the um…item recovery business," she improvised then turned to George. "George this is Jonathan. He's the prince." She said stating the obvious.

George bowed deeply, "My prince," he said respectfully though Alanna saw the mocking glint in his eye. Jonathan looked uncomfortable.
"Don't we have to be somewhere?" Alanna asked noticing this.
"Yes, your lessons," George said.
He bowed again mischievously and began to walk away. Alanna followed leaving Jonathan standing, gaping after them.

***

{A/N No bears were harmed in the making of this chapter :p

" The women of my land learned long ago that those without swords may still die upon them." *

I paraphrased this from Eowyn's line in The Two Towers movie. I'm not sure if it's in the book too.


"Women of this country learned long ago that those without swords may still die upon them. I fear neither death nor pain."                                     Eowyn