A/N George: Desperate plea for reviews! My Uni's got the mumps, please review before I catch them and become the shell of the man I am now!

Em: Howdy Partners! How are all my readers today? Good? Well I have had an interesting weekend of Maths and English coursework! Yippee, Oh and I went to see ROTK for the ninth time! Joyous occasion.

George: Can you say obsessed?!

Em: I am not obsessed!

George: Coming from the girl who has a 5ft 9inch cardboard cut out of a certain elf!

Em: 5ft 10inches actually!

George: Your stock is not improving!

Em: *glares* Anyhow, danke schon to cHoCoLaTeChIhUaHuA for their review. Lots of people think having a bro sucks but I for one think it is rather fun! Siblings rock!

George: Speak for yourself! Oh and lil'Smartass, I am coming for you. A plan has been formulated!

Chapter Five - The voices in my head.

"Are we there yet?" Groaned George who was carrying a sniffling Pippin.

"Don't you recognize the golden trees and weird glow that make us look like we have just stepped out of a nuclear power plant?" Replied Emily who was now feeling a lot better but kept up the act of exhaustion so that Legolas, who at that moment in time had his arm around her, would not let go.

"Stay close, young Hobbits! They say a great sorceress lives in these woods. An elf-witch of terrible power. All who look upon her fall under her spell and are never seen again!"

Legolas couldn't help but laugh at the dwarf's words but soon stopped when he noticed that Emily had disappeared from under his arm and both teens were out of where even his keen eyesight could see. He turned around and signaled to Aragorn for them to stop.

"What is it?"

Legolas let Aragorn's words fall in the air and continued to scan the area until he eyes rested on two figures standing at the base of a tree to the rear of the group.

The Fellowship gathered round them and entered the conversation between the two at a confusing point.

"I dared you, you have to do it!" Shouted George.

"All right but if I get shot again it's your fault!" Emily began to scale the tree. "Yep I can see him!" She called down. "Hey Haldir you overgrown... Hang on what was it again?" Emily ceased her shouting and looked down to George for help.

"Overgrown, pointy eared, dumbass!" Called back George.

Emily resumed her shouting, "Hey Haldir you overgrown pointy eared dumbass, you're getting a bit slow. Craig Parker would have been here by now with his band of merry men... or elves as it were!"

As if by magic a group of elves stepped in, all with arrows notched on their bows.

"Hey so much for you having the eyes of a hawk Gimli!" Exclaimed George who was also trying to convince Legolas that his one bow could not take out the group of Lothlorien elves.

"Where is the girl that knew my name?" Demanded Haldir, as he swaggered past his kin.

On cue Emily fell out of the tree and landed on Aragorn.

"Where's some odor-eaters when you need them?!" Screamed Emily as she shrank away from the smell.

Aragorn raised and eyebrow, he really wanted to know what an odor-eater was.

"How did you come to know my name? I know not your face, we haven't crossed paths before." Haldir was becoming impatient and didn't like the idea of forgetting a face.

"Really long story which you will find out once you offer me and my friends protection and a place to rest!" Stated Emily, as she tried to act as if the score of bows were not scaring her.

Haldir lifted his chin in a defiant manner but then began to laugh much to the surprise of everyone present.

"Follow me!"

"Don't you need to blindfold us?" Inquired Emily.

"Emily we have a map we know the way. This isn't one of your bondage fetishes is it 'cause that is just wrong!"

"No!!!!! It just that I think the bit when they get blindfolded in the book is funny especially when Legolas gets blindfolded, he was well pissed off!"

"I was blindfolded!" Said a startled Legolas.

Gimli began to roar with laughter.

"I don't know what your laughing about, you were the reason for the blindfolds, you see Gimli the elves just don't like you! In fact no one likes you!" Explained George as he hit the unsuspecting Dwarf round the head.

The Fellowship was led off and the two teens started to sing as they skipped along the path, which was of a yellowy color.

"We're off to see the wizard the wonderful wizard of elves!

He really is a wiz of a wiz if ever a wiz there was.

If ever a wonderful wiz there was the wizard of elves is one because..

Because because because because because....

Because of the wonderful elves his got.

We're off to see the wizard the wonderful wizard of elves!"

"Do you think they may be coming down with something?" Asked a concerned Haldir to Legolas.

Legolas just laughed and walked ahead to join the giggling duo.

"You sing strange songs!" Smirked Legolas as he walked in between them.

"You think that was strange!" Laughed George, who motioned for Emily to sing again.

She began to hum the tune to Rock Show by Blink 182 but soon launched into her own version of the song.

"I fell in love with an elf from Mirkwood"

Legolas said "What?!" and George said he didn't know.

"He's so cool gonna stick his pic in my window,

Everything better when he's around,

can't wait till his dad gives him the crown.

I fell in love with an elf from Mirkwood"

She stopped for breath but then returned to her song.

"Black and White pictures of him on my wall

I waited for his call

It always stopped me dating

And if I ever got to middle-earth

I'd show him what I'm worth

And that we should be mating!"

"OK that's enough EM!" Shouted George who snatched the blindfold which he insisted be used on Gimli and tied it round Emily's mouth.

"MMMmmmmmmmmmmmmm!" Mumbled Emily.

"I can only apologize for my sister, you see we dropped her on her head when she was a baby!"

"MMMMMMmmm Mmmm mmmm!"

"What was that?!" Laughed George.

Aragorn and Boromir began to laugh at the look of shock upon Legolas' face.

The laughter subsided when Haldir announced;

"Caras Galadhon. The heart of Elvendom on earth. Realm of the Lord Celeborn and of Galadriel, Lady of Light!"

The Fellowship were led to the base of a large staircase which tumbled down from the tree which stood before them.

"I don't suppose there's a lift?" Inquired George.

The surrounding elves looked on and said nothing.

"Didn't think so!"

****

Haldir brought them before the Lord and Lady, Emily and George chose to situate themselves towards the back.

"That Galadriel freaks me out Em! I'm already hearing voices in my head." Complained George.

"I don't think it's Galadriel George, did you ever get that checked out by a doctor?"

A bright light fell upon them highlighting the beautiful features of everyone's favorite elf.

"The enemy knows you have entered here!" Spoke Celeborn.

"Well that's not hard with Aragorn's smell lingering and Legolas leaving hair products wherever he goes!" Grumbled George, not to pleased with the impending danger.

Legolas and Aragorn looked at each other. Aragorn took a deep inhale of his armpit and seem pleased to find whatever smell had been trapped there. Legolas raised a hand to his hair and began to stroke down any end that had decided to turn upwards.

"What hope you had in secrecy is now gone!" Celeborn began to glance menacingly at the two teenagers.

"Urmmm... Not to interrupt, but I've just noticed that we are rather high up!" Squeaked Emily. She stepped back and was about to faint but was disturbed by the sound of hocking emanating from her brother.

"What are you doing?" Said a exasperated Boromir.

"I am lining up my shot for the best loogy ever produce by a man in Middle-Earth!" Laughed George as a big gob of spit fell from his mouth.

"Hey Aragorn, didn't you used t...." Aragorn placed his hand over the elf's mouth.

"Ten there are here, yet eleven there were set out from Rivendell. Tell me, where is Gandalf? For I much desire to speak with him. I can no longer see him from afar." Celeborn changed the subject.

"Stupid prat fell off a bridge!"

"Way to break it to them gently!" Snapped Emily as she glared at her brother.

"He was taken by both shadow and flame. A Balrog of Morgoth!" Legolas clarified the fact that Gandalf didn't just fall off a bridge.

The Fellowship along with Galadriel and Celeborn lowered their heads as grief consumed them.

"Look in the words of Arnie, 'I'll be back' or in Gandalf's case, he'll be back!" Smiled George hoping they would forgive his little outburst.

Galadriel peared into the boy's eyes looking for answers.

"Help! Em she's probing me!"

"You are so lucky that I don't have a dirty mind because I could have taken that last statement as quite offensive to my polite, well brought up nature!" Smirked Emily.

"You well brought up! You forget we share the same parents!"

Galadriel turned her attentions away from the boy and onto Emily. She delved deep into the girl's mind but soon a confused look crossed her face.

George took this opportunity to explain:

"If the book is empty, there ain't anything to read if you catch my drift?"

Galadriel turned away and looked over the Fellowship, "Do not let your hearts be troubled. Go now and rest for you are weary with sorrow and much toil. Tonight you will sleep in peace"

****

The Fellowship was led off down the stairs, much to the relief of Emily and the Hobbits. They were taken to a place where they could rest for the time they would occupy Lothlorien.

Legolas taking this opportunity to speak to other elves, whom he greatly missed having conversations with, snuck off.

"Where is he going?" Whispered George to Emily, hoping not to disturb the sleeping Hobbits.

"I don't know but I'm going to follow him!" Emily got up and walked off in the direction the elf had just gone in.

"Wait what am I..." George's words were lost as Emily disappeared from sight. "Great! Alone again! One of these days I am going to go peculiar and start talking to myself!"

****

George: The mumps are still lurking around, better get these reviews in quick! Oh and my apologies for the next chapter, I was decidedly absent when Em wrote it soooooooo it could be a tad warped!