I do not own Harry Potter, Gilderoy Lockhart, Draco Malfoy, etc
Chapter One
Draco Malfoy was leaning back on two chair legs when Gilderoy Lockhart entered the
Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom, he wobbled and fell forward into his desk,
but everyone was too busy either scoffing or mooning over Proffesor Lockhart to notice.
He blushed anyway. He slipped his hand into his robes and squirted Gilderoy Lockhart
Perfectly Placed Hair Gel into his palm, and smoothed his hair back with both hands,
eyes never leaving Lockhart as he paced in front of the class in his sweeping lilac robes
telling the beaming girls in the front row that there'd be plenty of time for autographs after
class.
Proffesor Lockhart handed their quizzes out manually, making deliberate eye contact with
every student, drinking in their adimiration and jealousy. Draco's heart thudded against his
ribcage when Lockhart complimented his hair. He hoped he didn't look as lovesick as
Crabbe, who was leaning towards Lockhart and literally drooling on his parchment. Draco
jabbed his elbow into Crabbe's ribcage, and tried to look cool as his quill hovered over
the quiz. He knew all the answers, just looking at the words made his heart flutter, writing
down that the underpants Gilderoy was wearing when he defeated the Egyptian Ectoplasmatic Chimithrapop were lavender with silver accents.
When the quiz ended Draco was sweating, bent over the parchment, trying not to think
of Proffesor Lockhart, in the same classroom, Proffesor Lockhart sitting back in his chair,
and gazing at his own portrait that sat on his desk. It smiled. Lockhart instructed one of
the giggling girls near the front to collect the quizzes with her wand and send them to his
desk. He looked over them with the prettiest sour expression imaginable.
with Ghouls", I never could have defeated the Ectoplasmatic Chimithrapop if I hadn't been
wearing my lavender underpants with silver accents. Everyone knows Chimithrapop's,
Ectoplasmatic or otherwise, are repelled by silver!" he swept his arm in the air with a flourish,
and looked down at the next quiz, "Ah! Here's a bright pupil, Draco Malfoy!" His eyes scanned
the students, until he found Draco.
Draco's heart was caught in his throat, Lockhart stared at him in silence, until Draco could
manage a squeaking, "Yes, Proffesor?"
"Ah, yes, Mr. Malfoy..." he wavered for a moment, and gave a boyish grin, "You got every
question correct, and you write with such delightful style," he paused, and laughed to
himself, "I wish you were writing my next review!" His eyes left Draco and he looked over
the rest of the class, having caught a moment for self promotion, he announced, "In case
anyone has failed to get a copy of my autobiography, Magical Me, It's not too late to send
an owl off for a copy from Flourish & Blotts. How thrilled you must all be to have me for
a Proffesor this year! I can autograph your copies!"
It was hard to forget, no matter how hard he tried to push it away, he spent the rest of
the day in an embarrassing state of distraction. He tried to eat Crabbe's hand during lunch.
He did fairly well during his first Quidditch practice, because something happened to pull him
out of his lusting mire. He encountered Harry Potter & the Gryffindor quidditch team on their
way to the field. Harry Potter inspired a much angstier emotion than the lust that was brewing
about his loins for the beautiful blond proffesor. It was a very deep seated lust, for a fellow
student, and one of which he was extremely well practiced in handling, with an outward
appearence of distaste & rivalry. He got in a good dig at Hermione Granger at the same time,
it wouldn't have gone near so well, as she was oblivious to what the term Mudblood meant
if that git Weasely hadn't tried to curse him with his dodgy wand. Draco set a
good example for himself with the Slytherin quidditch team.
That evening as he walked back to the Slytherin common room, he encountered Harry
Potter and his lapdogs, Granger & Weasley. They were whispering in the hall and going
about their usual annoyingly elitest behaviour.
He spoke as he went past them, "Feeling better, Weasley?"
"He's fine, Proffesor's Pet," Potter said in a scathing voice.
Draco stood silent for a moment, and reached into his robes to throw a good hex at Potter,
when Proffesor Lockhart interupted.
"What, what, no dueling in the halls, lads! 5 points from Slytherin, Mr. Malfoy, and detention
on Friday, I should think." he nodded at them, and smiled, saying to Potter as he left, "You
mustn't let your celebrity inspire such enimity, Potter!"
Chapter One
Draco Malfoy was leaning back on two chair legs when Gilderoy Lockhart entered the
Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom, he wobbled and fell forward into his desk,
but everyone was too busy either scoffing or mooning over Proffesor Lockhart to notice.
He blushed anyway. He slipped his hand into his robes and squirted Gilderoy Lockhart
Perfectly Placed Hair Gel into his palm, and smoothed his hair back with both hands,
eyes never leaving Lockhart as he paced in front of the class in his sweeping lilac robes
telling the beaming girls in the front row that there'd be plenty of time for autographs after
class.
Proffesor Lockhart handed their quizzes out manually, making deliberate eye contact with
every student, drinking in their adimiration and jealousy. Draco's heart thudded against his
ribcage when Lockhart complimented his hair. He hoped he didn't look as lovesick as
Crabbe, who was leaning towards Lockhart and literally drooling on his parchment. Draco
jabbed his elbow into Crabbe's ribcage, and tried to look cool as his quill hovered over
the quiz. He knew all the answers, just looking at the words made his heart flutter, writing
down that the underpants Gilderoy was wearing when he defeated the Egyptian Ectoplasmatic Chimithrapop were lavender with silver accents.
When the quiz ended Draco was sweating, bent over the parchment, trying not to think
of Proffesor Lockhart, in the same classroom, Proffesor Lockhart sitting back in his chair,
and gazing at his own portrait that sat on his desk. It smiled. Lockhart instructed one of
the giggling girls near the front to collect the quizzes with her wand and send them to his
desk. He looked over them with the prettiest sour expression imaginable.
Tut tutting, "Too many of you have neglected your pre-term reading, how
could you have
missed question 12, it's from one of them most important passages from my book "Gabbing with Ghouls", I never could have defeated the Ectoplasmatic Chimithrapop if I hadn't been
wearing my lavender underpants with silver accents. Everyone knows Chimithrapop's,
Ectoplasmatic or otherwise, are repelled by silver!" he swept his arm in the air with a flourish,
and looked down at the next quiz, "Ah! Here's a bright pupil, Draco Malfoy!" His eyes scanned
the students, until he found Draco.
Draco's heart was caught in his throat, Lockhart stared at him in silence, until Draco could
manage a squeaking, "Yes, Proffesor?"
"Ah, yes, Mr. Malfoy..." he wavered for a moment, and gave a boyish grin, "You got every
question correct, and you write with such delightful style," he paused, and laughed to
himself, "I wish you were writing my next review!" His eyes left Draco and he looked over
the rest of the class, having caught a moment for self promotion, he announced, "In case
anyone has failed to get a copy of my autobiography, Magical Me, It's not too late to send
an owl off for a copy from Flourish & Blotts. How thrilled you must all be to have me for
a Proffesor this year! I can autograph your copies!"
It was hard to forget, no matter how hard he tried to push it away, he spent the rest of
the day in an embarrassing state of distraction. He tried to eat Crabbe's hand during lunch.
He did fairly well during his first Quidditch practice, because something happened to pull him
out of his lusting mire. He encountered Harry Potter & the Gryffindor quidditch team on their
way to the field. Harry Potter inspired a much angstier emotion than the lust that was brewing
about his loins for the beautiful blond proffesor. It was a very deep seated lust, for a fellow
student, and one of which he was extremely well practiced in handling, with an outward
appearence of distaste & rivalry. He got in a good dig at Hermione Granger at the same time,
it wouldn't have gone near so well, as she was oblivious to what the term Mudblood meant
if that git Weasely hadn't tried to curse him with his dodgy wand. Draco set a
good example for himself with the Slytherin quidditch team.
That evening as he walked back to the Slytherin common room, he encountered Harry
Potter and his lapdogs, Granger & Weasley. They were whispering in the hall and going
about their usual annoyingly elitest behaviour.
He spoke as he went past them, "Feeling better, Weasley?"
"He's fine, Proffesor's Pet," Potter said in a scathing voice.
Draco stood silent for a moment, and reached into his robes to throw a good hex at Potter,
when Proffesor Lockhart interupted.
"What, what, no dueling in the halls, lads! 5 points from Slytherin, Mr. Malfoy, and detention
on Friday, I should think." he nodded at them, and smiled, saying to Potter as he left, "You
mustn't let your celebrity inspire such enimity, Potter!"