Disclaimer: I don't own the show the characters, etc. of Smallville and Lois and Clark and I'm not affiliated with creators, producers, etc.

To everyone that reviewed: Thank you very much for your comments. They are the essence of what encourages a writer to keep going. I appreciate the support greatly. Hope you all enjoy this chapter!

Authors Note: This chapter contains a nice few Lois & Clark jokes, but for the most part, you don't need to know much about the show. Also, to clear up any confusion prior to the reading, Lois is the connection between the two. She herself is from the Smallville universe, but where she is also a character connected to both (Chloe's cousin, Clark's future fiancé) then she knows about the show Lois & Clark. The two universes mix and voila, we get Jerry Springer a la Smallville and Lois & Clark. Sorry if this is confusing, but it was just for a bit of fun. You know, the dramatic irony, lol. As for how such a thing can happen – well that's up to you.

It was late in the afternoon and Jonathon and Martha Kent where wondering where their son could have gotten.

"I think Chloe came by earlier and he went somewhere with her." Martha told Jonathon.

"Yeah, well he neglected to finish his chores."

Jonathon let Martha know that he was going outside to replace the rotten fence posts near the edge of the property.

"Sure honey, but can you switch on the television for me? It gives me a bit of company while you're outside." Martha said, while removing a pie from oven after baking.

Jonathon walked into the living room and turned on the television. The channel was set to Fox Rochester. He heard the blare as the noise paraded through the room. It was a talk show, the most distasteful one he knew of – Jerry Springer. He was about to change the channel when Jerry made an announcement.

"Now we're back with our guests Chloe, Clark, Lana, Lois and Pete after the mysterious fire that occurred earlier in the studio."

Jonathon's jaw dropped. "Martha, I think you might want to see this."

"What is it honey?" She walked into the room and was shocked at what she saw. "So that's where Clark is."

Jerry went on to say, "As a recap, Chloe and Lana are fighting over Clark, Lois is trying to convince Chloe that she needs to find someone else, and Pete just admitted that he loves Lana. We've also learned part of Clark's secret he's been hiding."

Martha could see Jonathon's temper begin to flare. "Just who the hell does he think he is anyway? I should go there right now and rip Jerry's head off! And what the hell does Clark think he's doing?"

"Jonathon, calm down."

"Like hell I will! Clark is on national television, Martha. National television! And they already know some of his secret! I'm going there right now!"

Martha, realizing that it was no good to argue with him, gave in. "Okay," she said, "just give me a second to take the rest of the pies out of the oven."

Back on Jerry Springer...

The audience finished chanting, "Jerry, Jerry!" and Jerry looked at the camera.

"Alright," he announced. "So far we have five guests. We've established that Chloe and Lana both love Clark, but Clark only loves Lana back, and their relationship is restrained because Clark is keeping secrets. We've also learned that Pete loves Lana. Now, I would like to introduce Mr. Lex Luthor! Come out, Mr. Luthor."

And so, Lex Luthor walked out from backstage. He walked in a very dignified manner, and was dressed in a black suit with a tie. He took his place in the seat next to Pete.

However, Clark noticed something quite different about him. While the Lex he knew was supposed to be bald, this man had short, wavy, black hair. He also had a sinister smile replacing the friendly one Lex usually had. This couldn't be Lex, could it?

"Hello, Clark," the new Lex said, and then completely turned his attention on Lois Lane. "Ms. Lane, you are most beautiful in your attire tonight. Would you care to join me tomorrow night for dinner at Chez Lion?"

Lois looked at the man with utter disgust. "Uh, no! I don't even know you! Why the heck are you asking me out for dinner?"

"Of course you know me, Lois. You were the first one that interviewed me, remember?"

Lois scrunched up her eyebrows. "Okay then. You definitely have me confused with someone else."

Chloe was sitting in her chair sulking. She looked at the new Lex. "I don't know who the hell you are but you are not Lex Luthor!"

Clark stood up. "Okay, everyone just calm down and we'll figure it out okay."

"Shut up, Kent!" 'Lex' said. "Or I'll tell the world your secret!"

Clark went pale. "W-what secret?"

The new Lex laughed. "It's so obvious, I'm surprised that Ms. Lane hasn't figured it out yet."

"I don't believe you know anything at all!" Clark shouted, bravely.

"Oh come on Kent, everyone knows that you're Superman!"

"I'm whozit?"

Lex laughed again, mockingly, as if to say, "Who doesn't know who Superman is?"

Lois suddenly burst into laughter. "Oh I get it! Hey Lex, I think you're about 10 years ahead of yourself. You're too early! This is Smallville, not Lois & Clark!"

Then everyone else followed suit, and soon everyone erupted into laughter at the new Lex. Lex bowed his head in defeat and shut up for the rest of the time being.

Jerry looked confused. "Erm, okay well I'd like to introduce the real Lex Luthor!"

Out walked the real Lex, again with his business suit but also having the normal, bald- head, which he usually sported. When he reached the other Lex, he glared at him.

"Who the hell are you and why are you impersonating me? I mean I don't even look the least bit like you!"

The other Lex sighed. "Forget it," he said.

"I assure you that it's not something I forget about when someone walks in pretending to be me."

And thus, the two Luthors were caught in a headstrong battle of wits.

Out of nowhere, a man in his thirties wearing blue tights and a red cape walked onto the set.

"Hey! I didn't introduce you yet!" Jerry yelled.

"Who the hell are you?" Clark asked.

"Superman. Geez, I thought everyone knew who I was by now."

Clark glared at the guy and immediately burst into tears laughing. He began to laugh so hard that he was rolling on the floor holding his gut.

Pete looked at the guy. "You're wearing tights, and a cape," Pete said rather sarcastically. "So what do you do?"

"Well, I help out wherever I can. I save people, and help with accident and emergency scenes. I'm usually in the Metropolis area."

With this, Clark paled and ceased his gut-wrenching laughter. "W-what?" he stammered. Then the meaning of the 'other' Lex's statement about his secret became clear.

"Yeah, you heard me."

"How come I've never heard of you, then?" asked Chloe, the ever-intrepid reporter.

"Actually, I haven't the faintest idea why. Most people have." He shrugged.

"Oh my god. Oh my freaking god." Clark whispered, as his throat had gone completely dry.

Superman pointed to Clark. "What's wrong with him?"

"He's experiencing shock." Pete offered.

"What's his name?" Superman asked.

Pete smirked. "Clark Kent."

Superman's smile suddenly faded. "But that's impossible!"

The other Lex spoke up. "It makes things interesting doesn't it Superman?" He smirked.

Lana, and Chloe stared ahead blankly. Lois had already caught on.

Clark sat down, closed his eyes, and formed a ball. He began to rock back and forth. This had to be his most embarrassing moment. "I'm going to be that?" he thought. Then he sighed.

Next (one or two chapters): Lex (the real one) reveals a shocking secret, Clark's origins become public news, Jonathon and Martha reach the set, and Chloe and Lana's dispute may be resolved! It's an ending you wouldn't expect!