From my dreams.
Chapter 1
8 months later...
A tall figure, a long sword in hand, trod softly along the streets of Kyoto. It was barely day break, the city had not awoken from its slumber save a few store vendors eager to start a days work. His shadow grew smaller as the sun rose in the sky. His cheek muscles contracted into an almost smile as a familiar building came into view. As he fingered a small box in his coat pocket, he regretted not coming back sooner.
He was startled when he saw the door of the familiar building slide open. A woman stepped out into the morning sun, carrying a broomstick. His footsteps did not falter however, his steady stride resumed until he was in front of the woman.
" Okashira! You're back. Okaeri."
It wasn't often when something surprised Shinomori Aoshi. This was one of those times. Okashira?
" Okashira?"
" Yes. You are the Okashira...maybe you should come in first. I'll get breakfast ready for you. I think you'll need to talked to Okina right away."
Aoshi nodded at Omasu, walking into the Aoiya with a terrible feeling in his gut. Once he was refreshed, changing out of his ninja uniform, he walked downstairs, noticing the bustling activity of the Aoiya in the morning. However, it seemed rather empty. Something was missing.
" Aoshi...you're home."
Okina sat in the dining area were Okon was setting down two trays filled with food.
" Welcome back Okashira...I better get back to work."
Okon left the room, leaving Aoshi bewildered again. Why did everyone insist on calling him Okashira? He took a seat in front of the other food tray, chewing slowly as he watched Okina scarf down his food like there was no tomorrow.
" The trip was a success. I managed to suppress-"
Okina cut him off with a wave of his chopstick. He set them down and looked Aoshi straight in the eye.
" I must tell you of the changes that has occurred here since you left."
Aoshi too set down his chopsticks and ceased eating, giving Okina his full attention.
" You have been proclaimed Okashira. This was the last request of the previous Okashira before she left."
" Misao...where is she?"
Panic rose as Aoshi's fists tightened. He feared the news Okina would tell him.
" It's not what you think. She married soon after you left, 2 months to be exact."
Aoshi felt strangely numb as he took in the news. He struggled to keep from voicing his disbelief and frustration. Making sure he would speak in a calm voice, he spoke again.
" To who?"
" Donashiro Kaede. You've met him? He and Misao were good friends even before you left."
" Donashiro...the Seiibanshuu member?"
" Yes. She wrote that when she married, the leadership would be passed onto the one most capable. I guess she didn't want the Oniwabanshuu to merge with the Seiibanshuu. You do accept this honour don't you?"
" Hai."
Okina wiped his mouth and stood, leaving Aoshi alone in the room. Aoshi stared down at the tray before him. He had left for 6 months only to find that she was out of his reach. Forever. His mind wondered back to the little box he had hidden in his room. He closed his eyes, punching a nearby cushion and swore it would never be given to the intended receiver. It would never see the light of day again, just like his heart.
____
" Ohayo minna!"
Misao smiled as she bounded into the Aoiya. Shiro quickly grabbed a chair for Misao to sit on. Her pregnant stomach was quite obvious, no matter how well her kimono had been arranged. A servant girl stood next to her, fanning Misao while she sat in comfort.
" Take a rest Kanako...theres no need for that. I'm perfectly happy!"
The servant girl smiled, sitting on a chair herself. Okon and Omasu hugged Misao until she started to protest from smothering.
" Okaeri Misao!"
" You know very well I don't live here anymore. Why do you still insist on welcoming me home? So how are things at the Aoiya?"
" Mou Misao-chan! You don't visit enough!"
Okon admonished her as she handed her a cup of tea. Misao sighed as she held the cup up to her lips.
" It's not my fault...Kaede doesn't like me to leave the house too much."
" He doesn't?"
" Erm...its because of my condition. Shouldn't move around too much he said."
" Here you go Kanako...try some of this! The Aoiya specialty!"
The young girl looked wide eyed at the bowl of udon Omasu set in front of her.
" Can I have it? Really?"
" Yep."
" Arigato!"
Okon sweatdropped at the sight of Kanako digging into the noodle.
" Don't they feed you over at the Seiibanshuu?"
" Well...they don't feed the servants so well. I give her my share sometimes."
Waiting until Kanako was too absorbed in eating, Okon leaned close, whispering in Misao's ears.
" He's back."
Misao tightened her grip on her shawl at the news. She had waited so long for this day, then he had returned. She had so many questions...but now she didn't want the answer. Misao didn't care to find out why he had left her, the wounds he had left were still fresh. Even time had not healed all wounds. But she knew she could not hide forever.
" I'll go see him."
_____
Birds chirping.
The faint sounds of the Aoiya restaurant.
Tense silence.
Misao sat in front of Aoshi in the sitting room. It was deserted, with Okina in his study and everyone in the front of the Aoiya. Only she remained, watching Aoshi for any sign of emotion.
" ...so Aoshi. How was the trip?"
" It was fine."
Silence.
More silence.
" um...Did you enjoy it?"
" Why did you marry Donashiro?"
Misao's eyes widened in surprise at Aoshi's direct question. She felt unable to meet his relentless gaze, looking away.
" ...Because...because I..."
" Is it because you love him?"
Misao was speechless. She couldn't bring herself to say the word love and Donashiro in the same sentence. But out of loyalty to her husband, she could not give a negative response. She couldn't say anything.
" Even after what happened, you decided to marry another."
Anger bubbled inside Misao as Aoshi's condescending tone reached her ears.
" It wasn't my fault! You were the one who left me. You didn't tell me where you were going...I thought you weren't coming back!"
" Well I didn't think I had to!"
Aoshi's face mirrored Misao's shock. He had raised his voice. Never in all her life had she ever heard her Aoshi-sama raise his voice at anybody, much less her. Aoshi's muscles were taut from the frustration of his current situation. He inhaled, letting the air calm him down.
" ...No one told me you left....until I had agreed to marry Kaede."
Aoshi gave no answer, standing up and moving towards the door.
" Please...Don't hate me. I...I didn't know."
Aoshi looked down at Misao who was tugging his pant leg. Her large, tear filled blue eyes pleaded with him.
" Its too late. You can't go back."
Aoshi detached Misao's hand gently and slid open the door.
" Don't hate me?"
Without another word, he stepped out of the room, sliding the door behind him. He hated himself for feeling this way. He walked away, trying to block out the sounds of her weeping.
_________
Misao sighed wearily as she sat on the carriage with Kanako. She gazed out the window, trying to hide her red eyes from view. The Seiibanshuu compound grew bigger through the window as the carriage rode closer.
This was her home now. And it forever will be.
That thought made her heard clench as the driver coasted to a stop in front of the building. She stepped out, holding the drivers hand, trying to stop wobbling, unused to such shoes. Her usual ninja uniform, much less her shoes had been strictly prohibited by her husband.
" Sumimasen. Donashiro-sama would like to see you now."
Misao, startled, turned sharply to see her husband's man servant. She nodded, following the man servant inside the building. Kanako handed a small bundle to her as she left. Donashiro had never called for her like this. Checking her reflection in the clean windows of the hallways, she patted her long hair, smoothing it down. Kanako had artfully arranged onto the top of her head this morning, she didn't want to ruin her handy work.
" Donashiro-sama. She is here."
The manservant slid open the door, revealing Donashiro's seated back. Misao walked cautiously inside, jumping slightly when the door shut quickly with a loud slap, leaving the married couple alone inside the room.
" ...Kaede...I brought you some sweets from-"
" You were at the Aoiya today weren't you."
Misao, still standing, flinched at her husband's biting tone. She could feel his agitated state through his ki. Lying would not be an option.
" ...hai."
" He's back isn't he?"
Misao shuffled cautiously forward to sit on his side. She pushed the package towards him.
" Okon made these sweets-"
" Don't change the subject!"
Donashiro whacked the side of the package, spilling the sweets all over the floor.
" ...he..."
" Don't lie to me. I know he's back! You had a fight with him! Are you having an affair?"
Misao reached forward, harshly slapping her husband across the cheek.
" Why would you accuse me of such ridiculous things? You sent someone to spy on me didn't you?"
Donashiro stood, picking Misao up by the shoulders and slamming her against the wall. He slapped her on both cheeks.
" You don't deny it then?"
Tears fell rapidly, wetting her cheeks and making her eyes turn redder. Her body shook, not with fear but with anger.
" I forbid you to go back to the Aoiya ever again. You will not see that man or the Oniwabanshuu. You are to remain in this house. Do you understand?"
" And what if I don't?"
Misao stared determinedly back at him, pushing him away from her.
" Then something bad will happen. Obey me Misao or even kami can't help you. Don't betray me."
Misao's eyes narrowed, glaring at Donashiro.
" Are you threatening me?"
" Take it however you like."
Misao had heard enough. She stormed from the room, running for the exit. She ran outside, pulling the carriage door open and jumped inside, her hair in disarray. The driver, peeked inside the carriage.
" Take me back to the Aoiya."
" But-"
" Just do it."
___________
Misao stepped out of the carriage, letting go of the driver's arm as soon as she regained her balance.
" err...Driver. You do not have to return for me. Go back now."
" ...hai."
Misao watched the carriage ride away, dragging the back of her palm across her eyes to wipe her tears away. She squared her shoulders, putting a watery smile on her face before entering the Aoiya.
" Irrashaimase...Misao?"
Okon walked up to her, bending slightly to examine her face.
" Ara! Doushita no Misao?"
" Okon...may I stay here tonight?"
" Sure you can...but Misao-"
" Can you ask the questions tomorrow?"
Okon nodded, letting Misao walk past her and into the back.
" Can I get some food here?!"
Okon sighed, pushing it to the back of her mind as she rushed to the customer.
__________
Misao took several deep breaths as she walked up the stairs to her old room. On the way, she passed by Aoshi's room, looking through the slightly open doorway. Aoshi sat inside pensively, with his kodachi in front of him.
" ...Aoshi-sama...I hope you don't hate me. I just...I couldn't wait around forever."
Misao gripped the wooden frame of the wall, closing her eyes to hide the hurt that would have been revealed. He gave no answer.
" Say something...please."
The silence continued. She couldn't stand there for much longer without feeling like too much of a fool. She slid the door shut before walking towards her room again. When she entered, she noticed that nothing had changed since she had left it. She quickly changed into a light yukata before lying on her futon, grateful to sleep away from Donashiro for once.
She wondered, how everything could go so wrong in such a short span of time.
_______
" Donashiro-sama. Your wife is at the Aoiya. The carriage driver just returned."
Donashiro's brown eyes narrowed as he took in his man servants words. He slammed his fist onto the table.
" I told her specifically. I told her there would be consequences. Yonda."
" Donashiro-sama."
" Send someone to have Kashiwazaki killed."
" But Donashiro-sama. He is a highly skilled ninja."
" Do it, I don't care how."
" Hai Donashiro-sama."
The man servant bowed, leaving the Donashiro alone in the room.
" I told her not to betray me...I warned her."
**********
Chapter 1
8 months later...
A tall figure, a long sword in hand, trod softly along the streets of Kyoto. It was barely day break, the city had not awoken from its slumber save a few store vendors eager to start a days work. His shadow grew smaller as the sun rose in the sky. His cheek muscles contracted into an almost smile as a familiar building came into view. As he fingered a small box in his coat pocket, he regretted not coming back sooner.
He was startled when he saw the door of the familiar building slide open. A woman stepped out into the morning sun, carrying a broomstick. His footsteps did not falter however, his steady stride resumed until he was in front of the woman.
" Okashira! You're back. Okaeri."
It wasn't often when something surprised Shinomori Aoshi. This was one of those times. Okashira?
" Okashira?"
" Yes. You are the Okashira...maybe you should come in first. I'll get breakfast ready for you. I think you'll need to talked to Okina right away."
Aoshi nodded at Omasu, walking into the Aoiya with a terrible feeling in his gut. Once he was refreshed, changing out of his ninja uniform, he walked downstairs, noticing the bustling activity of the Aoiya in the morning. However, it seemed rather empty. Something was missing.
" Aoshi...you're home."
Okina sat in the dining area were Okon was setting down two trays filled with food.
" Welcome back Okashira...I better get back to work."
Okon left the room, leaving Aoshi bewildered again. Why did everyone insist on calling him Okashira? He took a seat in front of the other food tray, chewing slowly as he watched Okina scarf down his food like there was no tomorrow.
" The trip was a success. I managed to suppress-"
Okina cut him off with a wave of his chopstick. He set them down and looked Aoshi straight in the eye.
" I must tell you of the changes that has occurred here since you left."
Aoshi too set down his chopsticks and ceased eating, giving Okina his full attention.
" You have been proclaimed Okashira. This was the last request of the previous Okashira before she left."
" Misao...where is she?"
Panic rose as Aoshi's fists tightened. He feared the news Okina would tell him.
" It's not what you think. She married soon after you left, 2 months to be exact."
Aoshi felt strangely numb as he took in the news. He struggled to keep from voicing his disbelief and frustration. Making sure he would speak in a calm voice, he spoke again.
" To who?"
" Donashiro Kaede. You've met him? He and Misao were good friends even before you left."
" Donashiro...the Seiibanshuu member?"
" Yes. She wrote that when she married, the leadership would be passed onto the one most capable. I guess she didn't want the Oniwabanshuu to merge with the Seiibanshuu. You do accept this honour don't you?"
" Hai."
Okina wiped his mouth and stood, leaving Aoshi alone in the room. Aoshi stared down at the tray before him. He had left for 6 months only to find that she was out of his reach. Forever. His mind wondered back to the little box he had hidden in his room. He closed his eyes, punching a nearby cushion and swore it would never be given to the intended receiver. It would never see the light of day again, just like his heart.
____
" Ohayo minna!"
Misao smiled as she bounded into the Aoiya. Shiro quickly grabbed a chair for Misao to sit on. Her pregnant stomach was quite obvious, no matter how well her kimono had been arranged. A servant girl stood next to her, fanning Misao while she sat in comfort.
" Take a rest Kanako...theres no need for that. I'm perfectly happy!"
The servant girl smiled, sitting on a chair herself. Okon and Omasu hugged Misao until she started to protest from smothering.
" Okaeri Misao!"
" You know very well I don't live here anymore. Why do you still insist on welcoming me home? So how are things at the Aoiya?"
" Mou Misao-chan! You don't visit enough!"
Okon admonished her as she handed her a cup of tea. Misao sighed as she held the cup up to her lips.
" It's not my fault...Kaede doesn't like me to leave the house too much."
" He doesn't?"
" Erm...its because of my condition. Shouldn't move around too much he said."
" Here you go Kanako...try some of this! The Aoiya specialty!"
The young girl looked wide eyed at the bowl of udon Omasu set in front of her.
" Can I have it? Really?"
" Yep."
" Arigato!"
Okon sweatdropped at the sight of Kanako digging into the noodle.
" Don't they feed you over at the Seiibanshuu?"
" Well...they don't feed the servants so well. I give her my share sometimes."
Waiting until Kanako was too absorbed in eating, Okon leaned close, whispering in Misao's ears.
" He's back."
Misao tightened her grip on her shawl at the news. She had waited so long for this day, then he had returned. She had so many questions...but now she didn't want the answer. Misao didn't care to find out why he had left her, the wounds he had left were still fresh. Even time had not healed all wounds. But she knew she could not hide forever.
" I'll go see him."
_____
Birds chirping.
The faint sounds of the Aoiya restaurant.
Tense silence.
Misao sat in front of Aoshi in the sitting room. It was deserted, with Okina in his study and everyone in the front of the Aoiya. Only she remained, watching Aoshi for any sign of emotion.
" ...so Aoshi. How was the trip?"
" It was fine."
Silence.
More silence.
" um...Did you enjoy it?"
" Why did you marry Donashiro?"
Misao's eyes widened in surprise at Aoshi's direct question. She felt unable to meet his relentless gaze, looking away.
" ...Because...because I..."
" Is it because you love him?"
Misao was speechless. She couldn't bring herself to say the word love and Donashiro in the same sentence. But out of loyalty to her husband, she could not give a negative response. She couldn't say anything.
" Even after what happened, you decided to marry another."
Anger bubbled inside Misao as Aoshi's condescending tone reached her ears.
" It wasn't my fault! You were the one who left me. You didn't tell me where you were going...I thought you weren't coming back!"
" Well I didn't think I had to!"
Aoshi's face mirrored Misao's shock. He had raised his voice. Never in all her life had she ever heard her Aoshi-sama raise his voice at anybody, much less her. Aoshi's muscles were taut from the frustration of his current situation. He inhaled, letting the air calm him down.
" ...No one told me you left....until I had agreed to marry Kaede."
Aoshi gave no answer, standing up and moving towards the door.
" Please...Don't hate me. I...I didn't know."
Aoshi looked down at Misao who was tugging his pant leg. Her large, tear filled blue eyes pleaded with him.
" Its too late. You can't go back."
Aoshi detached Misao's hand gently and slid open the door.
" Don't hate me?"
Without another word, he stepped out of the room, sliding the door behind him. He hated himself for feeling this way. He walked away, trying to block out the sounds of her weeping.
_________
Misao sighed wearily as she sat on the carriage with Kanako. She gazed out the window, trying to hide her red eyes from view. The Seiibanshuu compound grew bigger through the window as the carriage rode closer.
This was her home now. And it forever will be.
That thought made her heard clench as the driver coasted to a stop in front of the building. She stepped out, holding the drivers hand, trying to stop wobbling, unused to such shoes. Her usual ninja uniform, much less her shoes had been strictly prohibited by her husband.
" Sumimasen. Donashiro-sama would like to see you now."
Misao, startled, turned sharply to see her husband's man servant. She nodded, following the man servant inside the building. Kanako handed a small bundle to her as she left. Donashiro had never called for her like this. Checking her reflection in the clean windows of the hallways, she patted her long hair, smoothing it down. Kanako had artfully arranged onto the top of her head this morning, she didn't want to ruin her handy work.
" Donashiro-sama. She is here."
The manservant slid open the door, revealing Donashiro's seated back. Misao walked cautiously inside, jumping slightly when the door shut quickly with a loud slap, leaving the married couple alone inside the room.
" ...Kaede...I brought you some sweets from-"
" You were at the Aoiya today weren't you."
Misao, still standing, flinched at her husband's biting tone. She could feel his agitated state through his ki. Lying would not be an option.
" ...hai."
" He's back isn't he?"
Misao shuffled cautiously forward to sit on his side. She pushed the package towards him.
" Okon made these sweets-"
" Don't change the subject!"
Donashiro whacked the side of the package, spilling the sweets all over the floor.
" ...he..."
" Don't lie to me. I know he's back! You had a fight with him! Are you having an affair?"
Misao reached forward, harshly slapping her husband across the cheek.
" Why would you accuse me of such ridiculous things? You sent someone to spy on me didn't you?"
Donashiro stood, picking Misao up by the shoulders and slamming her against the wall. He slapped her on both cheeks.
" You don't deny it then?"
Tears fell rapidly, wetting her cheeks and making her eyes turn redder. Her body shook, not with fear but with anger.
" I forbid you to go back to the Aoiya ever again. You will not see that man or the Oniwabanshuu. You are to remain in this house. Do you understand?"
" And what if I don't?"
Misao stared determinedly back at him, pushing him away from her.
" Then something bad will happen. Obey me Misao or even kami can't help you. Don't betray me."
Misao's eyes narrowed, glaring at Donashiro.
" Are you threatening me?"
" Take it however you like."
Misao had heard enough. She stormed from the room, running for the exit. She ran outside, pulling the carriage door open and jumped inside, her hair in disarray. The driver, peeked inside the carriage.
" Take me back to the Aoiya."
" But-"
" Just do it."
___________
Misao stepped out of the carriage, letting go of the driver's arm as soon as she regained her balance.
" err...Driver. You do not have to return for me. Go back now."
" ...hai."
Misao watched the carriage ride away, dragging the back of her palm across her eyes to wipe her tears away. She squared her shoulders, putting a watery smile on her face before entering the Aoiya.
" Irrashaimase...Misao?"
Okon walked up to her, bending slightly to examine her face.
" Ara! Doushita no Misao?"
" Okon...may I stay here tonight?"
" Sure you can...but Misao-"
" Can you ask the questions tomorrow?"
Okon nodded, letting Misao walk past her and into the back.
" Can I get some food here?!"
Okon sighed, pushing it to the back of her mind as she rushed to the customer.
__________
Misao took several deep breaths as she walked up the stairs to her old room. On the way, she passed by Aoshi's room, looking through the slightly open doorway. Aoshi sat inside pensively, with his kodachi in front of him.
" ...Aoshi-sama...I hope you don't hate me. I just...I couldn't wait around forever."
Misao gripped the wooden frame of the wall, closing her eyes to hide the hurt that would have been revealed. He gave no answer.
" Say something...please."
The silence continued. She couldn't stand there for much longer without feeling like too much of a fool. She slid the door shut before walking towards her room again. When she entered, she noticed that nothing had changed since she had left it. She quickly changed into a light yukata before lying on her futon, grateful to sleep away from Donashiro for once.
She wondered, how everything could go so wrong in such a short span of time.
_______
" Donashiro-sama. Your wife is at the Aoiya. The carriage driver just returned."
Donashiro's brown eyes narrowed as he took in his man servants words. He slammed his fist onto the table.
" I told her specifically. I told her there would be consequences. Yonda."
" Donashiro-sama."
" Send someone to have Kashiwazaki killed."
" But Donashiro-sama. He is a highly skilled ninja."
" Do it, I don't care how."
" Hai Donashiro-sama."
The man servant bowed, leaving the Donashiro alone in the room.
" I told her not to betray me...I warned her."
**********