*~Cinderella~*
~*Chapter Three*~
Summary: **rewritten** A parody Cinderella story.
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, the Cinderella story, or anything in this except the idea and the Firebolt 5672.
Author's Note: Wow. One whole year since I last updated. Er…I was too lazy to edit? Um…the devil made me do it!
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Draco Malfoy was not having a good day.
First, he was practically molested by some old lady who thought he was attacking her, but really he was just asking her for the time. After that he was almost run over by a motorcyclist who turned out to be a girl with no manners, using a dog leash as a belt.
At another house, two Bloodhounds, a Great Dane, a black Lab, and dozen Schnauzers had almost maliciously attacked him. After calling off the dogs, the three female owners of the house (one of whom looked suspiciously like the girl on the motorcycle) begged his forgiveness. Draco, just wanting them to shut up so he could go on to the next house, said, "I forgive you." After a few minutes of attempted flirting by the owners (I would like to take this time to stress the word "attempted"), he finally recited his whole speech and left as fast as his poor almost-attacked legs would carry him, which was hard to do because some of the Schnauzers were chasing him down the driveway.
The last house Draco had to go to was Penelope's. When Draco reached the house, Pansy answered the door.
"Who are you and what do you want?" she demanded.
She's a pleasant one. "Hi. I'm Draco Malfoy," he recited with no emotion whatsoever. "I work for King Goyle and Queen Ginny."
"And I should give a hippogriff's behind because…?"
He ignored this and continued reciting. "I'm their messenger boy—"
"Ever hear of the saying 'Kill the messenger'?"
He rolled his eyes "—and I'm here to announce that in two day's there will be a Ball—"
"What kind of ball?"
Draco stopped his recitation and blinked in confusion. "What do you mean, 'what kind of Ball'?"
"You know, a baseball, a hockeyball. What kind?"
"Hockey is played with a puck."
"Whatever. What kind of ball is it?"
I think I've just found someone with the same IQ as Crabbe. And it was thought impossible. "Let me rephrase this into words you can understand: I'm here to announce that in two days there will be a dance," he said very slowly.
"Well, why didn't you say so in the first place!" she yelled.
Temperamental little brat. I pity her family.
"Pansy!" yelled a voice from inside the house.
Pansy sighed in frustration. "What?"
"Come here! I want you to test this!"
Pansy groaned. "PENELOPE!" Pansy yelled into the house. "SOMEONE'S AT THE DOOR!"
"I'll be right there!"
Penelope arrived at the door and told Pansy to get back to work.
Noticing the Royal Crest on his robe, Penelope put on what she thought was a pleasant smile. Her definition of the phrase "pleasant smile" and other people's definitions differ. So, really, she looked like she was an escapee from the loony bin. "Hello," she said in what she thought was a sexy voice.
Using all his will power to not run for it, Draco thought, That's it! Once my contract's expired, I'm quitting! I don't care how overpaid I am!
"Hi. I'm Draco Malfoy. I work for King Goyle and Queen Ginny. I'm their messenger boy and I'm here to announce that in two days there will be a Ball at the Royal Palace for Prince Vincent Crabbe so he can find a wife. All are invited. From the rich to the poor to the nobility to the poorest servant and even the Gypsies are invited."
"Why, that's wonderful." Heh, heh, heh! It's about time I get a new husband! "I hope the prince chooses me." Did I just say that out loud? Oops. "When is this Ball?"
"It will be held in two days at 7:30 in the evening."
"That's plenty of time to buy some new dress robes," she said to herself.
Wanting to be done with his messenger work as quick as possible he said, "That's nice. I have to go now."
"Bye!"
Draco put out his hand to collect his tip for delivering the message.
Penelope, being the stupid (not to mention cheap) person that she is, shook his hand, went inside, and closed the door.
"Cheapskate."
With all his messenger work done, he got on his Firebolt 5672 and flew away as fast as he could away from houses full of raving lunatics, dogs that attack him and then chase him down the drive way, and weirdoes that try to run him over with motorcycles.
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A/N: Hope you enjoyed this chapter. The first few paragraphs were a bit pointless, but I got bored and decided to add them in. I'm really sorry about not updating for so long. Really, I kept forgetting and when I did remember I was lazy. Again, I apologize.
Next Chapter: Pansy's locked in her room. Penelope, Ron, George, and Fred go to the Ball. You find out that some people really do have a negative IQ number. Who's Harry The-Human-Turnip? And what does Velcro have to do with anything?
I really hope I just described the next chapter. If not, I described the next two or three chapters.
Wishing You Prosperity and Pizza,
~Emmy Weezer~
(More commonly known as Emmy)
"She will promise you more than the Garden of Eden, then she'll carelessly cut you and laugh while you're bleeding. But she'll bring you the best and the worst you can be. Blame it all on yourself 'cause she's always a woman to me." —Billy Joel's She's Always a Woman