The bright orange sunlight has begun to peak over and between some of New York's finest skyscrapers. The warmth of the sun had already begun to radiate through the window that I've been looking through for the past 20 mins. Its been forever since I've seen the sun come up, almost forgot what a beautiful sight it was to see. My mind then drifts down towards the streets that are becoming more and more busy, even a few honks of the horns can be heard. Looking down at my watch, its 6:45 am, my kids will be getting up soon, the thought crosses through my mind as I remember the last time I was at home with my family and this time rolled around and Emily was banging on the bathroom door yelling for Charlie to get out. I let out a small sniff and a frown wondering what routine they would take dismorning to prepare themselves for school. A soft sound came from behind me, I turn to find Bosco slowly moving about in his bed. I walk up to him and take my seat while taking a hold of his hand and his eyes gently open.
"Bos" I whisper.
"Faith?, what are you doing here?" Bosco quietly asks.
With a small grin I respond with , "couldn't think of anywhere else I'd rather be". Bosco nods quietly and shifts his position wincing in pain at every movement.
"You Okay?" I say standing up to help move one of the pillows that had begun to fall.
Completely ignoring my question, "is everyone else okay? No one else got hurt?" Bosco asks his eyes now fixed on the ceiling.
"Yeah, everyone is fine. Cruz took out the shooter before he could let round 2 out" the silent answer of a nod while still looking up at the ceiling sent chills through my spine " Bos your…."
"I know"
I look up at him shocked at his response to see a tear slide down his cheek as he wiped it away. "I saw her die….she was next to me in the room". My heart broke at the sound of defeat in his voice.
"I'm sorry Bos"
"Don't be, I'm the one who should be sorry"
With that a nurse walks in the room, "Well good morning officer, how you doing, any pain dismorning?"
"No, I'm fine" Bosco answers quietly still focusing on the ceiling to hold back his emotions. I watch him, feeling his pain rip through me, 'Bos please don't put your pain behind closed doors'.
"Okay then, if you need anything just let me know" she said with smile and wrote something down on her clip board and walked away.
Without responding I sit back down in my chair allowing the silence to fill the room.
"Isn't Fred going to be pissed at you for being here?"
Unsure of how to respond, "No", I simply say.
"Why not? The last I checked he wanted to throw me out the window"
"He's not home"
"What happened?"
"He left the day you found out your brother was killed"
Nodding sadly, knowing why but I asked anyway "Why did he leave?"
"He was upset that I went back to work with umm, with…"
"With me" I finish for her, letting out a small chuckle like I can't believe this is happening "you should go back to him and tell him that you will find a new partner" I tell her plainly without taking my eyes off the ceiling.
"There's no going back this time Bos"
"Why not?"
"He had an affair"
"Wow this just keeps getting better" wiping away a few more tears from knowing the pain I have caused Faith "I'm sorry Faith, I…I wish I could go back and change everything that happened, for you. You don't deserve this pain I've caused you…I'm sorry"
"No Bosco, he did this to himself. I am not blaming you or anyone but him for this, he chose to do what he did all by himself you hear me, this is not your fault" I'm standing over him now with sincere eyes pleading him not to blame himself. Although he's looking up he still manages to get around my eyes and turn his attention completely off of me.
"Can I just be left alone"
"Okay" I whisper and in silent concerned eyes I finally look away. I get to the door and look back to see him begin to cry and I can only turn to walk away with a few fallen tears of my own.
"Bos" I whisper.
"Faith?, what are you doing here?" Bosco quietly asks.
With a small grin I respond with , "couldn't think of anywhere else I'd rather be". Bosco nods quietly and shifts his position wincing in pain at every movement.
"You Okay?" I say standing up to help move one of the pillows that had begun to fall.
Completely ignoring my question, "is everyone else okay? No one else got hurt?" Bosco asks his eyes now fixed on the ceiling.
"Yeah, everyone is fine. Cruz took out the shooter before he could let round 2 out" the silent answer of a nod while still looking up at the ceiling sent chills through my spine " Bos your…."
"I know"
I look up at him shocked at his response to see a tear slide down his cheek as he wiped it away. "I saw her die….she was next to me in the room". My heart broke at the sound of defeat in his voice.
"I'm sorry Bos"
"Don't be, I'm the one who should be sorry"
With that a nurse walks in the room, "Well good morning officer, how you doing, any pain dismorning?"
"No, I'm fine" Bosco answers quietly still focusing on the ceiling to hold back his emotions. I watch him, feeling his pain rip through me, 'Bos please don't put your pain behind closed doors'.
"Okay then, if you need anything just let me know" she said with smile and wrote something down on her clip board and walked away.
Without responding I sit back down in my chair allowing the silence to fill the room.
"Isn't Fred going to be pissed at you for being here?"
Unsure of how to respond, "No", I simply say.
"Why not? The last I checked he wanted to throw me out the window"
"He's not home"
"What happened?"
"He left the day you found out your brother was killed"
Nodding sadly, knowing why but I asked anyway "Why did he leave?"
"He was upset that I went back to work with umm, with…"
"With me" I finish for her, letting out a small chuckle like I can't believe this is happening "you should go back to him and tell him that you will find a new partner" I tell her plainly without taking my eyes off the ceiling.
"There's no going back this time Bos"
"Why not?"
"He had an affair"
"Wow this just keeps getting better" wiping away a few more tears from knowing the pain I have caused Faith "I'm sorry Faith, I…I wish I could go back and change everything that happened, for you. You don't deserve this pain I've caused you…I'm sorry"
"No Bosco, he did this to himself. I am not blaming you or anyone but him for this, he chose to do what he did all by himself you hear me, this is not your fault" I'm standing over him now with sincere eyes pleading him not to blame himself. Although he's looking up he still manages to get around my eyes and turn his attention completely off of me.
"Can I just be left alone"
"Okay" I whisper and in silent concerned eyes I finally look away. I get to the door and look back to see him begin to cry and I can only turn to walk away with a few fallen tears of my own.